A Route Obscure and Lonely

by JapaneseTeeth


Poisoned Sleep

“Spike.”

He buried his head in his blanket. The alarm hadn’t gone off yet. If Twilight wanted to go over the checklist for the Summer Sun Celebration a fourth time, she could do it herself. After spending all day helping her, he had earned some shuteye before the ceremony started.

“Spike!”

He heard his name again. Despite the fabric balled up in his ears, the voice was even clearer.

“What do you want?” he asked, in the most ornery voice he could muster. He liked few things less than being woken up.

“Spike, I need to talk to you.” The voice echoed in his head, as if it had bypassed his ears entirely. For the first time, he actually listened. The voice wasn’t Twilight’s.

“Who’s there?” He sat up. “Hello?” The emptiness of the dark room swallowed his voice.

“Spike, you need to wake up!”

He spun around. He couldn’t tell where the words were coming from, but it certainly wasn’t in front of him.

“I am awake,” he said. He slowly climbed out of bed, his eyes carefully searching for any sign of who was talking to him. Even in the darkness, the dim glow from the window meant that he could see the room was empty. He couldn’t decide if that made it better or worse. “What do you want?”

“I need to talk to you.”

“You’re already doing that!” he snapped. Right into my head, he thought. That’s not how it’s supposed to work.  It had to be magic. He’d have to find Twilight. She’d be able to explain where the voice was coming from.

“Yes, but our mental link is weak.”

“Mental link?” He opened the bedroom door and stepped into the kitchen. A pot of gemstone stew bubbled on the stove. “What are you talking about?”

“You need to wake up, Spike.”

“I told you, I am awake!” He opened the refrigerator door and glanced into the basement. Twilight was nowhere to be found; all of her magical testing paraphernalia sat still in the dust. “And I still have no idea who you are!”

“You know me, Spike,” the voice said.

“Uh, I’m pretty sure I don’t. If I did, would I be wasting time like this?” He rolled his eyes and stepped through the pantry door into the bathroom, where he was greeted by the sound of the shower. He squinted into the steam. The shower was flowing, but there was still no sign of Twilight. “Would it kill you to tell me who you are?”

“Luna.”

Spike’s claw froze halfway to the bathroom door handle. “You don’t sound like yourself,” he said. “Why don’t you just come over to the house instead of doing all this weird mind magic?”

“I cannot do that.”

“Why?” Spike asked, as he opened the bathroom door and walked into the library foyer. “It’s only a five minute walk from Town Hall to the Library. You’ve got plenty of time.”

“Yes and no,” she said.

Spike snorted as he took a seat at the table in the middle of the room. “What does that mean?” He opened a book, took out an apple and took a bite. “Why don’t you just tell me what’s going on?”

“I suppose I will have to go with my second plan.”

“Huh? What plan?” Spike tossed the apple core over his shoulder into the fireplace. This time, he didn’t get any answer.

He shrugged. “Wonder what was up with that. Oh well.” He stood and turned to the desk that sat behind him. There was a sandwich there with his name on it.

“Spike!”

He nearly jumped out of his skin. The voice was unmistakably Luna’s, and this time it came from directly behind him. He spun around. The wooden carving that had always adorned the library table was no longer a generic soldier; it was now the spitting image of Princess Luna. Spike blinked a few times to make sure that his eyes weren’t playing tricks on him. Then the carving started to speak.

“Now that I have your attention,” the carving said, “I need your help.”

He nodded dumbly.

“You are dreaming,” she said.

“What? I just woke up! You woke me.”

The carving shook from side to side. “No. You only dreamed that you awoke. You still slumber.”

“Huh?”

“Have you never dreamt of waking up, only to then wake up in reality? Take a look around you, and think. Things are not as they should be. Things are not in their proper places.”

He scratched his head. “Now that I think about it, the fridge doesn’t usually lead into the bathroom…”

“Yes, keep thinking.”

“And you’re usually just a carving of somepony’s head…”

“Good, good.”

He looked back at his sandwich. “And Twilight would never, ever let me keep food on her desk!” A shiver poured down his spine like cold water. He clamped his eyes shut and took a deep breath to stop the trembling. He opened his eyes slowly.

Everything was wrong. The bookshelves were all in the wrong places, and the room itself seemed twisted and stretched. For the first time, he heard the silence. Not just the quiet of an empty library, but the utter absence of any sound besides his own breathing. The hustle and bustle of everypony’s last minute preparations for the Summer Sun Celebration were nowhere to be heard. As a matter of fact, he couldn’t even see the moonlight coming in through the windows. He couldn’t see much of anything through the windows.

He walked cautiously to the door and stepped through. Then he blinked, making sure that his eyes were actually seeing what he thought they were seeing. They were.

The Golden Oaks Library didn’t look any different on the outside, but Ponyville was gone. The tree was now rooted on a plateau at the top of a barren mountain. A range of rocky peaks, some sharp, some cracked and oozing streams of lava, stretched to the horizon in every direction. Above his head, instead of the sky, another range of sharp crystal hills and mountains hung upside down. Rivers of what looked like liquid rainbow spiraled around the inverted formations, cascading from the peaks down into the valleys below.

It felt like standing between two sets of teeth. His eyes began to ache. The world wasn’t supposed to look like this. He stumbled backward into the library and close the door behind him.

“So, I guess I’m...  dreaming.” He steadied himself on the table. The ever-so-slightly twisted shape of the room was making him dizzy.

“How very astute of you,” the carving said. He couldn’t tell if the wooden eyes were rolling, but they probably were.

“Why didn’t you just tell me that?” he asked as he rubbed his eyes. “You know, with your” —he tried to think of the correct term, but it wouldn’t come to mind— “mind-talk or whatever that was.”

Luna sighed. “I suppose some explanation is in order. Right now, you are dreaming lucidly; that is, you are aware that you are dreaming. When I attempted to contact you, your subconscious rather than conscious mind controlled your actions. I thought it would be best to attempt to bring you into lucidity before attempting to give you any meaningful information. As you were not consciously aware, your subconscious would simply have processed the information I gave you without your conscious mind understanding the content.” She paused long enough for him to stare at her. “Does that sufficiently answer your question?”

He stared at her for a moment. He recognized most of the words, but they refused to mean anything to him. “Not really."

Luna sighed. “While you were dreaming, you couldn’t understand what I was telling you, so I had to wake you up first.  Is that easier to understand?”

He took a second to think it over. “Yeah, I think so.”

“Good. Now that you are awake, or at least in the process of waking, we have other things to discuss.”

“So why did you do the whole mind-talking thing instead of the… uh…” —he waved his claw at the carving— “that?”

“Projecting my voice directly into your mind is a good deal simpler and requires less magical energy,” she answered curtly. “Unfortunately, it didn’t seem effective, so I decided that projecting myself into your dreamscape would be an expedient way of prompting your conscious mind to take control. You may feel a bit disoriented for a few moments, but that is normal. Sometimes I forget how difficult it can be for those not accustomed to it.”

“Right. Of course.” Spike said absently. He took the sandwich from the desk. It might be a dream sandwich, but that just meant Twilight couldn’t chide him for eating it. “So, why did you go to the trouble of using all that dream magic stuff if you could just send a scroll? There’s no way I would’ve slept through coughing one of those up.”

“That was not a viable method in these circumstances,” Luna replied. Her mane attempted to flow, but the wood limited it to swaying stiffly back and forth in the nonexistent breeze. “I am also asleep at the moment.”

“Wait, I know it makes sense for me to be asleep, but weren’t you supposed to be helping Twilight get ready for the ceremony? She’d never let you take a nap now.” Spike took another bite of his sandwich.

Luna furrowed her wooden eyebrows. “I am not taking a nap, Spike. I am not asleep because I want to be. There is something important I must tell you.”

“You were so tired you fell asleep?” Spike cocked his head to the side. He couldn’t think of many circumstances when one wouldn’t want to be asleep.  Then again, Luna was something of a night owl. “But aren’t you normally awake at this time anyway?”

The carving shot him a glare that made him glad he wasn’t talking to Luna face-to-face.  If it hadn’t been muted a bit by the ethereal haze that hung in front of his eyes, he might have fallen out of his chair.

“As I said, I am not as asleep by choice,” she continued. “While I do have an affinity for dreams, I would much prefer being awake at the moment, all things considered. Because there is a—”

“So you just contacted me so that I could come wake you up? I’m pretty sure Twilight will wake you. After all the time she spent scheduling this she’s not going to let you sleep through the ceremony.”

Luna shook her wooden head. “That is not possible. Unfortunately, she is also asleep, because—”

“What?” He cocked his head to the side. “There’s no way that Twilight would fall asleep now. Not with the amount of coffee she’s been drinking.”

“Unfortunately, caffeine has little to no effect when it comes to potent sleeping spells,” Luna said. “Speaking of which—”

“Sleeping spells? Why would she cast a sleeping spell?” There was a vague feeling at the back of his mind that he was supposed to react with something other than mild confusion, but he couldn’t seem to find the appropriate emotion. “And why doesn’t Celestia wake the two of you up?”

“Because she is also sleeping.” Her eye twitched.

Spike stared at the carving while the words sunk slowly into his brain.“Why? I’m asleep because if I don’t take a nap now I’ll fall asleep during the celebration, but all of you should be awake! Is everypony in Ponyville asleep or something?”

Luna stared coldly at him for a moment before answering. “Yes. All of them. I do not intend to sit here and individually list all the ponies in Ponyville.” She snorted. “Every pony in Ponyville, as well in the immediate surrounding area, is in a deep sleep.”

“What? Why would everypony go to sleep?”

“Because Ponyville is under attack.”

Spike’s eyes widened and his claws began to shake. The feelings that had been so slow to appear began to return.  The haze that had been clouding his thoughts began to evaporate.  A torrent of excitement, fear, and anger washed over him.

“Under attack? Why didn’t you say so?! We have to save everypony!” He leaped from his chair and grabbed the mop that was leaning next to the fireplace. He held it in front of him like a lance and kicked the front door open. “Hold on, everypony! I’m coming!”

“Spike! Wait just a moment—” Luna’s words fell on deaf ears as he charged outside with a shout.

“GRAAHHHHHH!!” He whipped the mop back and forth as he shouted. “I’m gonna squash every last one of… uh…”

The landscape was every bit as desolate as it had been before.

“Oh right,” he muttered to himself. “I’m dreaming.”

“Are you done?” Luna asked when Spike stomped back into the library.

“Of course I’m not done! I can’t just keep dreaming if Ponyville is being attacked by something!” He threw the mop on the floor. “Why didn’t you tell me what was going on right away?” He grabbed the carving and began to shake it. “You have to wake me up! I have to go help everypony!”

“Calm down, Spike!” Luna’s voice sounded so solid that Spike froze mid-shake. “First of all, there is no rush. Time passes differently within a dreamscape than it does in the material world. Our entire conversation has taken perhaps a few seconds at most.”

“Oh.”

“Second, I decided that since time was not pressing, it would be prudent to give you time to adjust. Awakening from a dream is a confusing experience for those not used to it.” Her eyes narrowed. “Third, please put me down. It is disorienting enough projecting myself into your dream without you picking up my head and shaking it.”

“Sorry,” he mumbled sheepishly as he set Luna back on the table.

“In any case, now that you seem to have finally acclimated, I suppose it is time to inform you about what has taken place.”

“That would be nice, yeah.” Spike folded his arms and tried to look cross. It always bugged him when he got left out of the loop. “What happened, exactly?”

“A short time ago, perhaps a quarter of an hour in real time, a massive spell was cast over Ponyville, causing everypony within its range to fall into a deep sleep. Sleep spells are quite a simple construction, but this one was sufficiently powerful to overcome the latent spells that Celestia, Twilight, and myself typically use to protect ourselves from such things.”

“Wow, that must’ve been one crazy spell,” Spike said. Certainly not the craziest he had seen, but still impressive.  “Even Twilight still has trouble with area of effect spells.  This one must’ve been a doozy.”

“Yes, that is one way of putting it,” Luna said. “Even I am unable to physically awaken. That is why I contacted you.”

“Okay, but why me?” Spike asked. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to know the answer. “Wouldn’t it make more sense to go to Twilight? Or Princess Celestia? They’d both know more about how to break up a sleep spell than I would!”

“That’s doubtlessly true,” Luna said. “Which is why I attempted to contact them before coming to you.”

“Oh.” His voice sounded very small in his own ears. A chill ran through his veins, growing colder with each word Luna spoke.

“I was unable to enter their dreams by any method,” Luna continued. “Neither mental projection nor a more direct manifestation was possible. The secondary effects of the spell appear to be designed to prevent me from even viewing their dreamscapes, never mind entering them.”

“What about everypony else?” Spike said softly.

“As I was unable to reach the other Princesses, I naturally attempted to contact the Element Bearers. I was, with great effort, able to view their dreamscapes, but contacting them proved impossible. And I believe that their situation is by no means unique to them. It seems that their circumstances are the default for the spell.”

Spike rested his head in his claws. He was starting to get dizzy again, and he didn’t want to know what happened if you fainted when you were already asleep. “If the spell can do all that.. it must be ridiculously complicated.”

“Very. In the known history of Equestria, I can think of perhaps a dozen who were capable of designing such a spell, let alone powerful enough to actually cast it. Combining a practical effect such as forced sleep with such high level magical manipulation and anti-interference measures takes a great deal of skill. Not to mention the secondary effects of the enchantment.”

“Secondary effects?” Spike closed his eyes and breathed deeply. “Just how many effects does this spell have?  It sounds like it does a whole bunch of different things.”

“The primary effect of the spell simply puts the target to sleep. But rather than inducing natural sleep, the target is trapped within their dreams and made incapable of both becoming lucid within the dream, or completely waking up at all. But the additional effects are even more insidious.”

“Like what?” he asked.

“The spell siphons magic off of those trapped within it, and uses the energy to make itself stronger. I suspect that is why I was unable to penetrate the spells surrounding my sister and Twilight Sparkle. Like myself, they possess far more magical energy than an average pony, and the spell is stronger as a result. I suppose this is also why I am incapable of waking up, and have had such difficulty projecting myself outside of my own dreamscape. So far, you are the only exception. And that is why I need your help.”

Spike pointed at himself. “Me? Why?”

“You are the only one in Ponyville who can escape your dreams.”

“Y-you mean that not even you…” His mouth felt very dry.

She shook her head. “While I am still incapable of travelling to your dreamscape due to the spell’s effects on myself, you will likely be able to do so. It appears that whoever cast the spell failed to account for you.”

“You mean it didn’t target me?” Spike bit his lip, unsure of how happy he should feel.

“Yes and no. The spell targeted you, but because you are a dragon, it could not absorb your magical energy.”

“So what you’re saying is that the spell just made me fall asleep and didn’t do anything else?” He asked. “I’m not trapped like everypony else?”

“Exactly.”

“And you want me to go get help.” Spike’s voice sounded muted in his own ears.

“No.” Luna said. “You are the help.”


As he walked toward Sugarcube Corner, Spike reminded himself that he wasn’t still dreaming. The prone forms of the unconscious ponies that littered the road made that clear enough, but the world didn’t feel real. His feet felt too light. He balled his fists hard and felt his claws digging into his palms. It stung.

Everypony had slipped into a quiet sleep right where they had been when the spell hit. He gave them a wide berth. According to Luna, touching them now would cause some difficulties, and besides, the bodies gave him the creeps. The ponies were supposed to be up and about, not lying lifeless on the streets.

The clock tower rang, and Spike nearly swallowed his own tongue in sheer terror. He put a claw over his heart and took a deep breath as he listened. The bell rang five times, the clangs echoing through the empty streets. Today was the only day the tower would ring so early in the morning. The five o’clock bells were a signal for everypony to finish up what they were doing so they’d be ready for the celebration at six. Twilight had always called it the one-hour warning. He wished he knew how much time he had.

“Once you awaken, you will have to hurry,” Luna had said. “Time will begin to flow normally once more, and we do not have much of it. There is no time to seek outside help, and precious little time to put our plan into action. We would do well not to waste it.”

He felt a gnawing sensation at the pit of his stomach. He wanted to imagine that it was a scroll coming up. Luna had allowed him a moment to send a message to Cadance and Shining Armor; they couldn’t trust anypony else to help. In the back of his mind, he knew Luna was right. Cadance and Shining Armor were almost certainly sleeping normally, and even if by some fluke they received the message, by the time they arrived it might very well be too late. It was a long shot and he knew it. Luna had been very clear about that.

“You’re sure there’s nopony else we could ask for help?” He had asked the question several times in the futile hope that the answer would change.

“Who would you go to? Discord? For all we know, he is the cause of this mess. I will not risk it. Right now, you are the only one who can do anything.”

“Yeah, no pressure there,” he muttered to himself as he scurried along. “Save Ponyville from mysterious evil forces that even the Princesses couldn’t escape. That’s all in a day’s work. No problem! When this is all over I’ll probably get a parade and a statue in the Canterlot Statue Garden. Life-size, even!” He forced himself to smile.

“Or maybe double size or on a really big pedestal or something. With a nice plaque on the bottom. And maybe I’ll get Celestia to throw in a barrel of sapphires. Can’t do anything with a statue anyway. Unless they put it in Ponyville so I’d be able to see it more often. That would be pretty cool. They could put it right there!” He pointed, and immediately realized that he had already reached the town square. As a matter of fact, he was standing right in front of his destination.

Mr. Cake was slumped on the sidewalk just outside of his home. A short ways down the road his cart, bearing a three-tiered chocolate cake, had rolled to a stop against a bench.

“Eesh, he barely even made it out of the house,” Spike whispered. Mr. Cake obviously wasn’t about to wake up, but Spike couldn’t bring himself to break the silence that the spell enforced. His voice still echoed in his ears as if he had shouted. He looked over his shoulder, just in case whoever had cast the spell happened to be behind him. If they were there, they were invisible.

“So you don’t know who’s behind the attack? How are we supposed to do anything if we don’t know who we’re fighting against?”

“I may not know,” Luna had said, “but I have a several ideas. This plan will help me find out for certain.”

“B-but what if you’re wrong?”

She had taken a distressingly long moment to answer. “In that case, at least we will not have made our situation any worse.”

Maybe not for her, he thought. She didn’t have to creep through a ghost town, alone, with only a vague assurance to keep her moving forward. And for all he knew, whoever had cast the spell was hiding behind a nearby tree. More than anything he just wanted to turn around, run back to the library, and bury himself in his blankets. Unfortunately, chances were that as soon as he fell asleep, Luna would just give him a stern talking-to and wake him back up.

He took a step toward Sugarcube Corner.

Luna is counting on you, he thought, and forced himself to take another step. So are Twilight and Celestia.

Then his other foot moved. And Rarity.

He forced himself forward once more.

And Applejack, Pinkie, Rainbow Dash, and Fluttershy.

The next step was easier.

Everypony in Ponyville needs your help! 

He didn’t even pause between steps anymore. 

I saved the Crystal Empire, didn’t I?

He was practically skipping now. 

Though that was really more luck than anything.

He slowed to a walk.

And when they tried to honor me for it, I made a fool of myself.

He stopped.

“I’m not cut out for this! The Crystal Empire was a fluke and you know it! I was just in the right place at the right time!”

Luna had scoffed at him. “Does that matter? Fluke or not, you saved the Crystal Empire.”

“I saved the Crystal Empire by accident!”

“Perhaps you will save Equestria by accident.”

He’d felt like the library was shrinking around him. “But… but the chances of me being able to do anything—”

“Are better than if you sit here and do nothing.” Her voice had been like ice. “If you have any alternate plans to suggest, I would welcome them.”

He had thought about it ever since then, and he still couldn’t think of anything.

But she was right. Sure, the chances of success were miniscule, but they existed. It might just be luck that helped him escape the spell, but it beat being trapped along with everypony else.  A small step was better than standing still. He had reached the doorstep of Sugarcube Corner; all he needed to worry about now was going inside. He steeled himself and opened the door.

Sugarcube Corner had never been so silent. There was no Pinkie Pie singing as she made cupcakes. There were no babies screaming for mommy and daddy or laughing at Pinkie’s antics. There were no irate customers complaining that their misspelling on the cake customization form had been faithfully recreated in frosting. There were no dings, no whirrs, no ticking timers. There was only silence, weighing on his head like a boulder.

Mrs. Cake lay snoozing on the couch; she had likely sat down for a moment of respite after finally sending her husband out. Spike doubted that she had meant to stay there for so long. But she wasn’t the one he was looking for; Luna had been very clear about that. He strode past her, trying to ignore all the odd creaks and groans that houses typically made. Last Nightmare Night’s haunted house didn’t have anything on this, though at least Mrs. Cake had left the lights on.

He tiptoed past her into the living room. Pound and Pumpkin Cake were sprawled in their crib, snoozing soundly, unaware that they were trapped in the midst of a crisis. He put his claws on the edge of the railing. He found it hard to believe that this was where his quest to save Equestria began.

“The Cake twins? They’re the first ones that we’re going to try to save?” Luna’s plan had been a bit confusing, but nothing Spike couldn’t handle. Years of listening to Twilight’s rambling had given him an ear for needlessly complex explanations. But this just hadn’t made sense, and this time he couldn’t blame it on his dream-induced confusion. “Shouldn’t we start with somepony who might be able to help us more?”

“I know it seems odd,” Luna had said, “but we need to start small. If we alert our enemies to our presence, all is lost. You must trust me.”

“Of course I must,” Spike murmured to himself. “What choice do I have?” He took a footstool, shoved it next to the crib, and climbed up. “Well, here goes nothing.” He reached down with both arms and gently placed his claws on their foreheads. As his fingers brushed their coats, a wave of fatigue washed over him so quickly that he didn’t even have a chance to be surprised.

He closed his eyes, and the world vanished around him.