A Pegasus foal that Rarity found in the unexplored Windless Woods appears to be as uncivilized and savage as they come. Seeing it as her sworn duty as the Element of Generosity, she takes him into her home and with some help from Sweetie Belle, tries to teach him the civilized skills needed to integrate into pony society...
Considering that he seems to have the mentality of a Timberwolf, and appears to lack the basic concepts of pony communication and ways of life, this could prove difficult.
Current cover art commissioned by JitterbugJive
Chapters (16)
I take a rare look away from my writing to the new section and find this little dandy.
Keep it going!
I just gotta say it boys will be boys.
This story seems pretty good. I can't wait to see how it progresses. Good luck with future chapters. If you keep the updates coming, I'll favorite this story.
OK, this chapter was awesome. I enjoyed the discussions between Critter and Rarity, especially the feces comment. Lastly, it's interesting that you took some Tarzan references for this story.
you're doing a good job on the spinoff to Tarzan. (I mostly happy because there's no Disney clichéd.) 20 Brownie points for rarity stepping into poop. That was hilarious
Wow that was really fun to read, a nice spinoff from the Tarzan movie/movies. Tarzan is not my favourite thing, but it is definitly a good movie, i like the new movies, and it has a nice opening.
Well i want you to know that i think it was a really good chapter, and nice how he used his wings to hang on the branch, i just think that was a nice detail you thought of. Even if everybody knows that Pegasus ponys have wings, not everyone would have let him use his wings like this i think.
I would like it, if you would make it a long story and please let the romance take a while. I could believe, that the colt maybe would be a bit interessted if he sees something he like, because he would probably don´t even think of a romane if he like to hang out with Sweetibell or which one you choosed for the romance.
Because the colt has this background i somehow think Sweetiebell would fit very well in the role of (Jane?), at the same time i hope you don´t make to much similarities with the movie, that means i hope they go back to poniyville and don´t start to live in the jungle or something like that.^^ I can see how he would play around Fluttershys cottage, or how Diamond Tiara sees him and he get´s angry at her or somethign like that.
PS: And please don´t make him learn everything to fast. I mean i don´t want him to talk like everyone else in chapter 3 already. Let him learn some words for a while, i think you could maybe even do something funny with that.
PSPS: favourite
Nice opening chapter
MORE FOR SHITS SAKE plz
Awesome story! I really like the idea behind it!
What kept the Pegasus from flying for help?
5265880 Being cornered in a really tiny treehouse by a manticore with the door being the only way out, and the fact that the windless woods' manticores seem to have actual use of their wings due to being so light, unlike their Everfree Forest cousins.
The mom would've been killed either way.
5266895 so basically, what you're saying is that their Jaguars. That makes sense.
5268536 Ehhh...kinda. You know how lion's appearance is different based on their gender? The males have giant manes and are huge and lazy, but the females are a lot smaller and quicker and do most of the killing? Kinda think of it like that, except both genders in this case have basically the same build. They're still lion-like, but they all look pretty much the same.
So yeah, pretty much Jaguars.
Nice idea for a chapter. I guess now lets see how Fluttershy reacts to Timber. Something tells me he may not like being squished by a cream colored Pegasus at this moment. Great job with this chapter.
I hope he don´t make it easy for Fluttershy, but i hope they befriend each other in the end.
At the moment i am probably more eager, to get a new chapter for this story than one for a different story. I think i am statisfied with the name, and i hope you really don´t let her have an easy time with him.
I always hope for a long story, but i think if you do it right, this could probably be a long story, half of it because of the lagnuage barrier and that he simply have to acclimate to ponyville or any other thing.
Good story, very interessting for me.
Good work. I look forward to seeing him adapt to civil life. This story has a lot of potential.
Great chapter.
I have a question. Will Prof. critter be a love interest to rarity?
5280781 Maaaaaaybe.
i
'd the chapter, can't wait to read more.
5280825 well at the moment i don´t like him enough to want him together with Rarity, the professor i mean.
Actually i think i would like it, if it would be only Rarity, Timber and friends for a while. I think i would prefer it if the romance is for Timber, after he adapt a bit more to the civil life.
If you should still choose someone for Rarity, i hope it isn´t something likek instat love, even if it is Rarity. I don´t say that because you do that kind of things no, i just want to say it befor it is to late. I started to prefer if it is not instant love like in Equestria Girl, where Flash change his girlfriends like his Underwear.
I think you should do a romance for Rarity in a sequel, i really think this story could go with several storys if you take your time to think of something.
5281634 Just keep in mind that maybe doesn't necessarily mean yes.
And the focus is going to be mostly on Timber (and yeah, he will get a fillyfriend/marefriend or whatever you want to call it) with Rarity sort of taking that "Adopted Mom" role. If I ever plan on Rarity having romance at any point, it would more likely be in a sequel...
But I have this one to focus on first.
5282134 yeah your right sorry, but i think you say what i wanted to hear anyway, but i won´t force you to do anything, if i should maybe sound like it sometimes.
Well i was happy to be able to read that chapter, befor i had to go to work again today
5282229 hey can I ask you a question. Is English your second language? Because when you're writing it sounds like you have an accent.
5282134 that sounds good, I kind of think you should go about writing him as a friend to rarity. A slow growing friendship, that way you have a choice if you want him to be a love interest or not. Plus I think the colt needs a father figure in his life.
5282546
yes english is my second lagnuage, i try to better my grammar a bit, but i don´t think it will improve that much. As long as you are still able to understand me i am ok, i don´t want to say anything to complicated. Even if i would start to learn a better grammar, i don´t think it would be that easy and without help maybe even not possible for me, i somehow don´t think it would be easy to learn it in a book.
I wanted an accent as i was younger, so i guess i have reached one goal at least.
Nice job with this story. I can't wait to see what happens to Timber if he is taken to Ponyville. That would be funny.
Love this chapter.
that was great, I really like the conversation that you wrote for each of them.
I hope not too much focus is placed on Fluttershy. Rarity was set up to be the main character, so she should be the one to help him adapt the most. One of the things I like about this story is how it's Rarity and not Fluttershy taking care of the one in need, unlike a lot of other stories.
Keep it up!
5294077 so basically Rarity is Jane?
5294095 It took me way too long to get that reference.
Maybe? I've actually never seen that movie so I wouldn't know. Thinking of it, that's probably what this story's based off of.
5294077 As much as I love Flutters, Rarity is pretty much the adopted mother here. As nice and cute as Fluttershy is, her role in adoption fics and things of that nature is very overdone. Not bad, it's just been done a lot.
Also in a way Rarity could be seen as Jane, except Rarity is way too old to be Timber's love interest. Who THAT will be will come a while down the road.
isn't a pony technically an animal?
oh, and good chapter.
5294302 Technically all living life forms except for plants are animals, but it only says that to basically say that he's savage, currently not capable of coherent speech or understanding it, and overall acts un-ponylike.
And glad you liked it.
5294319
JK
In that case, I want to be a lion.
Of course Timber would speak and act like a timberwolf.
And it seems that Raritt is indeed going to be the adoptive mother figure for him. I quite like that. There's not enough stories where Rarity is the mother figure.
I hope Timber is doing his amount of great chaos if he is a ponyville, maybe he should bring down Big Mac or giving him a hard time with a suprise attack
I just try to think what he could do in Ponyville, everythign has to be new, and somehow i don´t think that he would like shampoo because of the new smells, probably perfume that could be in the bottles or Rarity really would use this to get the smell out of him, but of course that would not be the only bath she could give him
5294152 i'm calling it now,sweetie belle is going to be jane,and if i predicted that right,you owe me a cookie!!!!!!!!
also,this story is awsome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This was a funny chapter. Great job. Good luck with the next one.
Nice chapter.
5295977 Glad you like the story. Thank you.
Although until the time comes for Timber's love interest, I ain't gonna explain shite.
Something bad happens, eh? Ominous!
My only recommendation for the story would be to "show" more instead of "tell." For example, instead of:
You could say: "Critter raised an eyebrow at Rarity's curious gaze, but he quickly made the connection as he traced her stare to the dejected form of Fluttershy. He explained, ..."
Nice chapter.
5298907 Yeaaaah, I tend to do that a lot. I'll try to work on that.
(imprinted) I am suprised that Rarity know this word, i don´t think that everyone have to know it if you don´t do much with animals, but then again she is more intelligent than other ponys i suppose. It is really not bad, i just think maybe Fluttershy or critter should be the one who speak about him being imprinted on Rarity.
The chapters maybe start to get small, but if we are able to have a few more because of that, i don´t mind to wait a bit. Hoonestly i would wait far longer for this story, it is just to interessting to have a story about a wild animal/pony, which doesn´t speak right after the third chapter.
The only thing i would ask from you is, that you make sure not to let him speak to soon, maybe a few words, which could be easy for him but not much. I just think that it would be bad if you just break the language barrier, this is one thing that makes the story interessting for me.
I would guess they get attacked from the friends of the manticore or maybe his Timberwolf family shows up, if he has any.
, that would probably end in a dark/comedy Tag for Rarity
Or if you say somethign bad happens, Timber just makes himself dirty again
I don´t know if he is nearly as strong as Tarzan, but i would like it if he is special, but at the same time not to strong, but clever in a fight.
I think i am done thank you for the sweet chapter.
5298930 awesome chapter, I really like the banter between rarity in the professor. That's good characterization, especially with timber. ~he he, stupid eyebrows~. So, is it safe to assume that your writing him as a friend now?
5299437 Mostly.
5299117 The term "Imprinted" also applies to humans, so in this case, it'd be only natural that a majority of the sentient species of this world would know what it means. And they are sorta referring to an animal-pony, so it fits in that sense.
I won't end up breaking the language barrier too soon. He kinda has to learn to talk eventually, but just not yet. At the moment, Fluttershy's just sort of giving rough translations, which could very well be right or wrong, seeing as her Timberwolf language is a little rusty.
And what I mean when something bad happens, don't worry about Timber, he doesn't lose a leg or anything (
), but probably will result in some major feels.
And yeah, if he's able to pin a grown manticore to the ground, I'd say that he's pretty clever in that sense.
Everypony will be in the Windless Woods for a few more chapters, and I'm not going to spoil anything, but some serious stuff happens.
I seriously wish I could put sad AND comedy on here at the same time. Or at the very least have a feels tag available or something. The way the tags are now can be REALLY misleading sometimes.
I'll just say it'll have its moments.
5299526 so, the annoying friend then.
5299537 His personality is kind of a mix of Applejack and Discord. He kinda likes getting on Rarity's nerves because they don't see eye-to-eye on a lot, but can sometimes find Rarity high-class attitude really annoying.
But at the same time he's got a good heart and knows what he's doing in the jungle.
So yeah. Kinda the annoying friend.
5299526
well i just meant Rarity would probably hate it if she have to wash him again, and that alone would be worth a dark tag for the drama queen
or tragedy.
Well you rememvber me of some points i had forgot for the moment, like the thing that he already have to be clever if he won against a manticore.
I don´t mind if it is going to be a bit more serious, something like this can´t be that good if there in´t something bad or sad happening. Every good moment that comes after something bad is probably even better, and sad don´t meant that someone has to die or anything, i just say it like that because i want to say i am ok with this, suprise me.
Naaaahh it maybe makes not that much sense what i say, but today is my weekend and i don´t want to think to much right now