Connor and Sweetie Belle have been doing some quality time together: helping with homework, walking to school, playing, talking, comforting after a personal dispute. After a while, Sweetie Belle begins to crush on the colt. She wants more than anything for him to be her coltfriend, but what will hold her back? The Cutie Mark Crusaders, Connor's obliviousness, or the fact that Connor is already dating Fluttershy? Dun-dun-DUNNNNNNN!
first
NOW i had time to read it sorry about that anyway.
I cant wait for more once again you have produced a masterpiece.
I salute you sir
Awesome! Gonna get right to this!
kapitiseniornet.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/and-so-it-begins1.jpg?w=584
Who disliked it?!
i.imgur.com/tZOS8.gif
This is gonna get interesting
a.deviantart.net/avatars/a/w/awwyeahplz.png dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Sweetie_Belle_lolface.png (I NEED A CONNOR EMOTICON)
634347
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/113/729/look-at-all-the-fucks-i-dont-give-theyre-just-falling-from-the-sky.jpg
there be a shitstorm a'comin
Sometimes I wonder...
Haven't read this yet. I intend to.
That being said, regardless of how well the story is written, get ready for a world of hate to be rained down upon you.
Lets see the rundown.
- Self insert OC? Check
- Dating one of Mane 6? Check
- Happens to be Fluttershy? Check
- Fillyphile? I'll give this a half check. The summary seems to suggest that the problem isn't that hes old enough to go to jail for it.
But, alas, I think I will enjoy this, cause it seems funny and the art is good. How bad can it be?
Yay this finally been posted.
I am so happy
634385 About what?
Why people keep posting 'first!' on new stories. It's incredibly annoying and moronically childish.
634407 Ah
634407
And pathetically easy at that.
634411
And why people keep on doing such a thing is beyond me.
634391 I strongly disagree that Connor is a fillyphile. Plus, Connor was a cartoon character I created for my high school comic series, who is pretty much based on me.
But, yeah, I can see where you are going with that. You've read my first fic, "Equestria's First Human", right? Everything should make sense before you read this one.
Well, we will just have to see how much hate is rained down upon me.

634427
Hate won't be rained down upon you if you don't deserve it. You've done nothing that proves you do to me. Your story is a bit repetitive, I'll give it that, but you're still a budding writer. Once you get a grasp on it, original, interesting characters should come easy.
634437 Well, I'm certainly not a professional
I write these for fun. I enjoy entertaining people
634448
I write for the art of writing. It drives me to perfectionism and it gets to a point where I become overly critical of myself and take longer than I need to. For example: It's taken me two months to write the first chapter of my fic Paradise Lost, and I'm still not done with it. Each scene has gone through at least fifteen different revisions. After my final revisions in the coming days, I'm posting it.
Uh, maybe you did this in your other stories, and I'm too much of an idiot to notice back then, but there seems to be a lacking of contractions in many places. It seems kinda odd to me. Like, you'll use "you are" and then a paragraph later use "you're". Just a minor complaint.
Anyway, still curious how this will play out. It does make some sense, what with Belle being ignored by Rarity, but I can't help but feel that it will end in ... Er, heartbreak for her.
634391 but this is a sequel to his first story and that got featured so i dont think it will get that much hate, and is it so wrong for a child to crush on someone older than them?
im sorry im stubborn
634407
Hey Least they most don't post this:
1.bp.blogspot.com/-_TkbcIBMy1Y/T2Ioh3r-T_I/AAAAAAAABGA/BAJcgUhFm7c/s1600/firstpost.jpg
634492
Goddamn it!
634495
Hey I don't like first posters to...but at least they aren't posting that...
Dammit I just did
634427 - I was only saying the summary should tell us that Connor is also against it, (or at least oblivious)
634489 - It's not wrong, I was merely saying that someone who hasn't read his previous stories might get that idea.
You are quick.
Please let there be
mclean.alltheragefaces.com/img/faces/large/surprised-clever-girl-l.png
moments
I MEAN THERE'S GOTTA BE
mclean.alltheragefaces.com/img/faces/large/surprised-clever-girl-l.png
MOMENTS
I imagine this getting awkward for Connor veeeery quickly.
634448
Adding to what I previously said:
It's because of that perfectionism and more likely my ideas that I won't become featured here. Besides that, it just takes me forever, but I can't win everyone over.
To wrap things up: keep up the hard work. And by that, I mean: edit, revise, question. Especially question. You have to be able to do that before you become good.
I'm off.
-RaptorSenior
PS: Have a delicious Wakfu battle scene: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5N77tmqmMpA
634524 I put down obliviousness in the description
Done!
No offense man, but get an editor. Please. ;_;
So times you used "wee". And other stuff.
BUT IT WAS AWESOME ANYWAY.
634407 Im sorry i was just so exited about the story that i wanted to leave a longer comment but i got pulled away so i just left it at that i have changed it now that i am back, trust me it bugs me to and im sorry
634368 Am i supposed to care?
634492>>634495
dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/firstpost.png
634680 You should care about as much as I do dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Derpy_Hooves.png
The only unsetting thing here for me is that the colt's name is Connor.Nothing against the name itself,is just that human names on these ponies is something I can't see as fitting.
Unless...this is a self-insert OC?
Question; Connor is dating Fluttershy, right? Why isn't he living with her instead of Rarity?
So I finally read this, but now I have to go to bed. Here's the stuff that I'm too lazy to comment on (I want to go to bed!):
>"Of course, we have math. Show me what you need help on."
>"You had gotten every single one correct!"
>Apple Bloom said as she stuck her head inside a huge hallow knot of a tree.
>And pretty... pretty... cute, too..."
>Clop... clop-clop... clop-clop... clop-clop... clop-clop...
634691 Go read the first story
634796
[youtube=t348e24vDyA]
This Is a awesome story I love it keep going.

Can't read...gotta college.
Gonna finish college...read later...and laugh my a$$ off. (<--See that money there? That will soon be yours. PROFIT INCOMING!)
634796
I've got to agree with that, but the easiest way to explain it would be... The evil bunny who should be named devil...
634782
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m3znj6NyN41qhlbvk.jpg
Brilliantly cute! Looking forward to more!
Have a good one.
634961
Makes sense. Maybe he will move out since this is gonna be extremely awkward.
Oh wait...
634989
Where would he go? You can't just have him move out the awkwardness is a major factor to this story... denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw2594-5Zd1w.png
635052
Notice the 'oh wait' in my comment.
635069
I did... Just now... damn.
635071
Ok, I cannot keep a straight face!
It's ok... we all make mistakes...
Nice job dood. Keep doing your wonderful work for me to read.
scranton.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw4943-131224.png
-Glassed
Hark! A sequel is ahoof!
634691 Feel free to read my first fic, which was pretty popular in FIMFiction. It's called "Equestria's First Human."
It should all make sense after you read it
Oh this is gonna be good.