Princess Twilight Sparkle wakes up to find herself in an alternate Equestria, where everypony is nice, nothing ever bad happens and everything is just 'perfect'.
Naturally the place bores her to death.
Chapters (1)
Bendy
Joined 14th Jun, 2012 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Golden Age · 1.1k words · 15 4 · 1.4k views
- Bendy · 1.1k words · 112 13 · 3.2k views
- The Orange Nebula · 1.2k words · 54 1 · 861 views
- TheExhaustedBrony · 1.4k words · 21 1 · 911 views
- Derpator · 2.1k words · 43 2 · 1.4k views
- Loganberry · 3.4k words · 49 2 · 1.6k views
- Tired Old Man · 13k words · 28 5 · 1.3k views
- Derpator · 6.5k words · 32 2 · 1.2k views
Featured In11
The Writers' Group56,392 stories ·9,291 members
One-Shots18,906 stories ·2,369 members
- Comedy Sketches831 stories ·186 members
Twilight is Best Pony6,371 stories ·3,071 members
Twilight Sparkle12,272 stories ·4,753 members
- Struggling Authors25,180 stories ·3,671 members
Short Stories5,069 stories ·547 members
The Shameless Self-Promotion Bureau49,225 stories ·5,456 members
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Stats
Page generated in 0.098 seconds
Total duration
805 users online
1,220,922 hits today, 2,280,440 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
This kind of peace is what all heroes strive for.
Really put the finger on what makes this show good: conflict.
Kudos.
4575077
Well yeah, if everything was perfect I most likely would have never watched the show. And perhaps the Brony fandom might not have ever existed.
4575034
My boy!
4575156
Wait. So I didn't end up cumming inside Rainbow Dash?
Huh. That makes a change. Though I can't tell if that's good or bad. I think it might be good?
But being serious now, this was great. Magic.
4575248
Not this time. Thought I'd so something a bit different.
Mr Bean is magic man.
The concept of perfection is unattainable. Because no matter what, someone's going to find fault with it. And sometimes, in a paradoxical sort of way, that fault is perfection itself.
While I think this is a solid philosophical message you're presenting here, it's hard to take it seriously when you're playing it solely for laughs. Which is ironic, because honestly, the humor is rather lacking. Nothing in this was really all that funny. I know what was supposed to be funny, but lamp-shading can only get you so far, my friend.
Also, why did Perfect!Twilight zap Princess Twilight to her world to begin with? To take away the pain of losing Golden Oak Library? To have somepony new to play with? Because the Almighty Cthulu told her to? You'd think that Twilight would ask that at some point after discovering that this isn't the home she knows and loves, but she never gets around to it.
What really gets me, though, is that this could've been a lot stronger if you went a different route. If this was more Lovecraftian in nature, or perhaps modeled after The Twilight Zone (no pun intended), it would've made for a more compelling read, thus making your message that much more resonant. I honestly thought Perfect!Twilight was going to insist on keeping her doppelgänger in this purgatory of blandness forever. Seriously, she was kinda creeping me out. But, you shut that notion down before it could even get started. Tsk, such a waste.
As it stands, you had the potential for a great philosophical think-piece, but you didn't bother to take advantage of it. I'm sorry, but I find that to be most disappointing.
4575275
What an insightful comment.
Well, I don't have much time on my hands. So, I just wanted to make a quick slightly more intelligent one shot than usual. *Points to trollfics.*
I know perfectly well I can't write to save my life. So if anyone thinks they can do better, I would love to see someone write a story (and a better story) with this very concept.
I think something's worth pointing out: your narration very much feels like the narrator is directly speaking to the reader.
I find it unsettling.
Maybe it was on purpose.
4575275
"Life is pain, princess. Anyone who says differently is selling something."
Don't know what to say, really. I liked it, but you know, no offense, it did fell rushed as if more could have been done instead of "that one conversation that is the entire story".
Still, it had some funny bits, and you didn't overextended the element of repetition, which could have easily made the story annoying.
Overall: good comedy, (personally) too short, okay concept, although nothing too original, fun read.
I'd give it a solid FUN out of FUNNIEST.
*also yes, this *cough* review *cough* was completely unprofessional and was more of a rant.
Well that was... Short.
What is the cure to everything?
I shall never use the word magic in this context ever again if this is what I sounded like! 
Magic
...
EVERYTHING IS MAGIC!
Maybe you need some MAGIC MAGIC MAGIC BITCH!
4575836
Magic is best answer.
4575836
Just like how...
I'm sorry.
Possibly this is some sort of gotcha! aimed at those fans which dislike Grimdark fanfics or Deathfics, but if so it's just too silly to offend.
At first I thought this was going to be about Generation 3...
I'd be frightened if I was put into a world like that..... Seriously, though human kind is pretty chaotic and violent, I would prefer that then...."Perfect world."
But this story was hilarious! XD
4576315 Wish that would say everything is magic
You know, reading this I can kinda see Discord's view on things.
Who the hell would want to live in a place that terribly boring?
4577684 It kind of is like generation 3 though.
Da faq did I just read?
...
......
.........
4580597 A PERFECT FANFIC!!!
Seems like normal Equis to me.
4580634 I don't know about "perfect"- pretty damn good, but not perfect. the first sentence confused the shit out of me until I figured out what Mr. Rush was trying to say.
4580973 Well you catch my point it's hilarious and entertaining.
4580957
Uh King Sombra and other random evil ponies?
4581029
Sad excuses for villains if you ask me.
I like the story.
4581142 Well, Sombra DID enslave the crystal ponies after all.
4583289 He's a brat, not a villain.
4583538 He is? I had no idea actually.
Next question..
"What's your name?"
"Magic"
"Where does all your magical energy come from?"
"Magic"
"But.. that breaks the law of conservation"
"Magic"
"Why do you like Celestia?"
"Magic"
"Mind control?"
"Magic"
"How did I get here?"
"Magic"
"How can I get home"
"Magic"
4575275
The reasoning to bring Princess Twilight there.......
magic
The answer for everything is Magic, how could i not see that?
4586857
It is kind my response to some MLP FIM fan fiction that depict equestria way too perfect.
4586765
What should come next is Twilight returning with friends to de-perfect their perfect world for them. That world ... um how could Pinkie Pie even be in a world like that at all? It is horrible.
4580957
No it doesn't and you know it. So please stop pretending to be retarded.
4605279
I'm sorry, I don't recall knowing who you are. You must not know me very well, I like to make jokes about these kinds of things. Get it? A joke. J-O-K-E.
Even if you didn't get it, don't be a little fucking pussy about it.
4605435
... Aw shit man. I'm REAL sorry about this.
My pills were wearing off, and when they do, I get impulsive. I just read some horribly misanthropic Conversion Bureau tripe, so I was a little depressed.
Impulsiveness+Depression=Regrettable Actions.
Sorry...
4605614
Don't even fucking try that. I've heard more than plenty of this bullshit before where people are like, "hur dur, I had a rough day", or "mah peels didn't work". So I wouldn't even bother.
4605639
... I deserve that.
Guess I'll just have to accept the fact that I burnt this bridge before it was even built.
I'll stop bothering you.
4584188 What is the meaning of life?
"magic"
Teehee, just have this musical number and it would be even more "perfect".
Appreciate that I killed at least 60 brain cells listening to that mush.
4658102
I just listened to that song. I too felt I lost 60 brain cells listening to that.
4661729 I felt so deliciously evil posting that
Magic. Magic. Magic. Magic.