• Member Since 4th Oct, 2011
  • offline last seen Aug 25th, 2018

Melon Hunter


E

Pinkie Pie is on top of the world right now. Why wouldn't she be? She just found out that she's a part of the most awesome family in Equestria (well, almost definitely). However, when a chance encounter in the market leads to the discovery of another distant Apple cousin in Ponyville, she realises that everypony should have a chance to know if they're related to the best family ever!

The only problem is, 'family' has very different meanings for different ponies...

Written for the 'Pinkie Apple Pie' prompt on Equestria Daily.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 20 )

This is probably the best story of this type I've read so far!

I like it! If this doesn't win some kinda honorable mention AT LEAST, I will be very disappointed in EQD!

This is seriously great. The pacing was maybe a little languid between hard jokes for the type of comedy it seems you were going for, but everypony's character shines through and are very likeable, when the humor does hit it's wonderful, and you manage to tie everything together with a sweet and sentimental moral.

I wouldn't be surprised if you have two stories climbing the feature box pretty soon.

Now that was a fine story. I agree, this has got to make it into the top three at least!

I really liked this story. It read like a follow up episode of the show; I could totally imagine them turning this into an episode.

:pinkiehappy: :pinkiesmile:m:rainbowkiss::rainbowlaugh:m:twilightsmile: :raritystarry: :ajsmug::derpytongue2::yay:Is all I can say

I have to say this is a cute little story and was definitely fun, but I feel like the ending is overshooting it. Adopting a dozen different ponies one barely knows into one's family in a single day to me is moving much too fast. It feels like a romance story were the couple falls in love on first sight and immediately gets married. I'd think things would need more time than that.

3789791 3789982 3790184 3790172 3790735 Thank you all very much for your kind words! Unfortunately, I don't think EqD feature any of these stories above any other (they just all get bundled in together by the looks of it), but I'm flattered that you think it's one of the best of the bunch! :twilightsmile:

3797992 Thanks! I can't say I agree entirely with the critique, and the marriage analogy definitely falls flat for me, but I think that's probably down to different interpretations of 'family'. I know I would certainly find it strange to suddenly adopt someone into my family, but that's because mine is small and close-knit. From what we've seen in the show, the Apple family is so gigantic and wide-spread, there's little hope of any one Apple being close to all of their relatives. Applejack seems to take it in her stride whenever a new relative who she's never met before turns up.

Furthermore, all those ponies adopted turned up to see if they were an Apple not because of any material gain, but because they were all looking for a sense of belonging. One way or another, they didn't have a real sense of family (and Thunderlane and Rumble especially so), which AJ had been lucky enough to have always experienced. Faced with that, and the inherently sprawling nature of the Apples, it doesn't seem especially wrong to introduce them.

Really, this is just a clique of friends who formed out of a particularly chaotic situation and a mutual yearning for a sense of belonging. It's much more a first date than a shotgun wedding; the way I see it, those dozen are simply granted a sense of family and an offer of inclusion. Obviously, the familial ties don't form straight away—and you're right it'll take a lot of time before these characters would consider one another more than acquaintances in that regard—but after what happened at the end of the episode regarding the smudged scroll, I honestly can't see Applejack not extending an offer of companionship to those hankering after a family. What those seeds will grow into is unclear, but I wouldn't consider it out of character for her to at least do that.

I realise this has turned into a rather rambling essay, but I thought I'd just show you all of the method behind my madness :rainbowwild: Don't get me wrong, I certainly see where you're coming from, and I realise it's a pretty huge leap in family numbers from the beginning of the story to the end. I guess it's just left up to the reader what exactly it means to be accepted into the Apple family like that. Chalk it up to me trying to break the mould when it came to interpreting that prompt, I guess!

3798340

Apple Family best Family.

Also, must feel for BonBon. I know she was in the crowd in Apple Family Reunion and she's more of a cousin to AJ than Lyra.
Four seconds in, far right center.

Strudel joke. :rainbowlaugh:

3798340
I'm glad I read this story! I wasn't expecting to find feels in it, but they're the best feels I've felt from any of the stories from this event so far.

Still dont get the bit about the strudel... But excellent story regardless!

I really like the underlying concept here, and the "moral" as it were too. That so many ponies wish they had a bigger family was really touching (and I think, very true), and as was noted, the "Pinkie invites everyone!" thing could totally be an episode of the show itself. My one criticism is that the overall story is a bit loose and uneven. The important/impactful elements feel scattered throughout the narrative, rather than fitting into a tighter arc of plot. The humorous points are a bit haphazard as well. I'm by no means saying I didn't still enjoy the read (I did!), but I think if you tightened things up a bit—really focused both the plot and humor elements—then it could go from being a good story to a truly great story.

A torn scroll shouldn't be that big a deal to Twilight. If she can come up with spells for pony-Breezie transformation, summoning parasprites and altering vampire fruit bat diets, I'm sure a scroll-mending spell isn't that much of a stretch. Worst comes to worst, she could always transcribe those records onto a clean scroll.

an impromptu lasso made of a torn scroll

Never mind!
img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20121222152716/mlp/images/d/d9/Rainbow_Dash_whistling_innocently_S3E8.png

*Grins and applauds* Bravo.

This was a really nice story. I enjoyed the fact that it was very in keeping with the narrative style of the show, and I found the occasional dips into more mature comedy very enjoyable.

I agree with the "Seattle's Angels" critics who said you wrote Pinkie Pie exceptionally well. It's rare to see a funny Pinkie story that toes the line between absurd and clever so well. I also liked the fact that this was a somewhat silly premise played sincerely, rather than just a gag.

Great writing. I hope to find time to look at some of your other work, given how much I enjoyed this one. :twilightsmile:

Not a gut-buster (Seattle's Angels comedies never are), but a fine read. Second-from-top-notch Pinkie Pie, story worthy of canon, and it always does me good to hear authors say that any given member of the mane six has six friends instead of five.

“And to family bein’ together!”

“Family bein’ together!” Everypony laughed as they took their final gulp and sat back down.

They all mimicked her accent. :ajsmug:

This was cute, and Pinkie Pie trying to figure out if everyone is related to her and the Apples (and everyone being related to the Apples in a small town) are both amusing ideas.

And of course, Rainbow Dash proposing to get free cider is very silly. Oh Rainbow Dash. :rainbowderp:

On the whole I enjoyed it, so it got a green thumb~ Though with the Apples it would be more of a green hoof.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

Not bad at all. :D

6374931 Thank you very much! Glad to hear this gets a stamp of approval from you :twilightsmile:

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