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It's lunchtime in Ponyville, and Twilight Sparkle's stomach is calling for something with a little more flavour than what she usually feeds it. How will she and her friends react, though, when the lavender unicorn discovers that there is no place in Ponyville where a pony can get a decent burrito?
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... DAT TWILIGHT
This story = what it's like to find a real burrito north of Oregon.
I haven't eaten since...I guess some time yesterday? I'm not exactly sure.
Anyway, I'm going to Taco Bell now. We don't have real Mexican where I'm from.
Stalin is amused! Another comedy! Stalin thought he completely drowned in a sea of Dark/adventure fics.
Humor is good. Pacing is fine. Characters are acting properly. Idea is... interesting. Overall: nice little fiction for evening entertaiment. Keep the good work and good luck!
Cute! I know how tough it can be when you're really jonesing for a good burrito. If you sub black beans in for black eyed peas, and add enchilada sauce, then bake the whole thing, this burrito recipe is essentially exactly they way I make vegetarian enchiladas.
Fixes: tainted should be "tinted," "frackus" should be "fracas."
This is why I put hot sauce on pretty much everything. I loves Dat spice. Being the half Mexican I am I also eat almost everything in a tortilla. Those tacos or burittos are always manly. There's a whole lot more to say but no one wants to see a wall of text. So yeah. Dis fic is major win
/)
Definitely on par with the rest of your work over on Fanfiction.
Fantastically done. The characters behave like you'd expect them to if this were actually in the show. It's not rushed at all which a lot of folks seem to do with one shots (not that I expected you to, of course). Twilight temporarily loses it again, which is always fun to watch/read.
And lastly, Derpy and Lyra! Thumbs up, my good sir.
Aspicio, diluculo Infinitas Noctis
Shadow Horizons
encrypted-tbn3.google.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSiInxTbN9fZ0ommj1Rd_oqeDh_OPuuHVH-NDquI8ehm6fUO_ec
I love REAL tacos and burritos.
Taco Bell can go fuck its own face.
Cheers
~iraqlobstah
I would cut out RD's description when she first shows up. Normally it's a good idea to give a character a detailed description when they first appear, but when using characters that your readers will already know, you should just skip the description. My feeling at that point was "yeah, it's Rainbow Dash. I've seen her in hours of cartoons, and I have a folder of RD pics on my HDD. Move on."
Overall, though, not too shabby.
Ah awesome story. You did a great job with capturing the characters and playing them out just right. Not to mention, the concept is refreshingly unique! Quite an enjoyable tale, my friend.
(Although I do have a fierce craving for a burrito now...)
306390
I do agree with you on that point about describing Rainbow Dash when the fanbase knows what she looks like, since I do have over five years now of fanfiction writing experience under my belt, I felt early on while writing it that I would need to practice writing the ponies' physical descriptions so that I'll have already done it once or twice before they appear as characters in my Kingdom Hearts epic over on Fanfiction.net
But thanks for the comment. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
May the Grace of the Valar Protect You
Shire Folk
Twilight’s horn became encased in magenta light, as did one of the burritos on the plate. She brought it to her mouth in her spell’s grasp, and bit down into the burrito.
It was horrible.
"FUCK YOU APPLEJACK WHY IS THERE APPLES IN THIS?"
"What sugarcube? Everything has to have apples in it!"
"FUCKING RACIST HICK, SUCK A DICK WHORE!"
Twilight was suffering from what me and my friends call Taco bell withdrawl. where one craves it so much you tend to lose your senses until you get your mexican styled goodness. sad to say I know a lot of people who succomb to this myself including which is why I love this story
So... Ponyville is Sacramento but with better inhabitants. I'll have to get Twilight to So Cal some time for reallfood.
305958
Okay… I know your awesome because
1. You're from Oregon
And 2. DAT AVATAR
I had a delicious real burrito a few days ago. It gave me food poisoning and I threw up a ton but it was totally worth it. (What? Those things are good!)
Anyway, point is: 'twas a fun little story!
I'm mexican and we don't have Taco Bell here.
really 
Now, I loved the story, it reads like an episode.
Better than i expected nice job...
Thanks a lot, now I'm hungry.
Silmarillion? me gusta.
Dear Princess Celestia,
Today I learned that good friends will always be there for you. No matter what problem you may face, they will do whatever it takes to help you. Just today, I felt a craving for a tasty burrito, but found to my dismay that this delicious Manican food was unknown in Ponyville. Seeing my unhappiness, my friends worked together and found a way to help me. Rainbow Dash even flew all the way to Canterlot (and back) to get the special ingredients needed to make them.
I also learned that if I run around looking panicked, ponies will do just about anything to calm me down, including flying to Canterlot and back if necessary.
Your Faithful Student,
Twilight Sparkle
Dear Twilight Sparkle,
It looks like you've learned something important about friendship today. However, I simply must ask you one thing: what's a burrito?
Princess Celestia
>>MisterFluttershy
Oregon, yeah! Go all the way, from the lush green forests to the deserts of BIGness, hoorah! Heh, Oregon.
What better way to finish a Twililicious day than to read a fan fic where our a-dork-able purple unicorn snaps?
This one was satisfying --maybe as much as Twi's burrito. Seeing that you mentioned your experience with fan fiction writing, this really should not have come as a surprise. The transitions between scene flowed like water being poured into a glass; nothing felt out of place. Your use of all characters --mane cast, background ponies, and even Fluttershy's cousin-- fit together better than slices of bread in a loaf. The way you portrayed them in here feels very accurate to the show.
I, for one, would like to disagree with Derpy Mooves concerning the need to describe Rainbow Dash's physical traits. It is very true that a detailed description is rather unnecessary when the audience clearly will know these things, but I think at the same time it was important to do it for this fic for the sake of practice as well as the possibility that few readers who may not have known immediately who RD is.
Whether you find it necessary in future writings is entirely up to you.*
So was there anything wrong with this fiction? If anything I would have to say that I did not see any destruction of the fourth wall coming from Pinkie Pie, but even that isn't saying much at all. Perhaps a "thumbs up" does not do justice as a rating here. 5 stars then.
*I realized as I was typing up that paragraph that is was the lessons from English Composition II ans Speech 101 that kicked in. Dang, I take personal pride in that and the fact that Twi is my favorite pony --students for the win!
And this is when I'm thankful that I can go and make my own burritos and tacos here in Mexico
310874
Washington, actually. That's why I know the lament so well.
311028
Haha! YES!
May the Grace of the Valar Protect You
Shire Folk
This story is great, the characters behave almost like in the show, I just have 2 nitpicks...
What is a tortilla shell? Are you refering to those things Taco Bell uses? or something else? I know that a burrito must be made with a Flour tortilla (tortilla de harina here in Mexico) that are completely different to what TB calls "tortillas", here in Mexico we don't have TB's because we wouldn't stand for that s***. I went to a TB once but it was years ago when I visited L.A. the food wasn't bad but it wasn't good or mexican either. Wow I got off topic.
The other is the pun for Mexico, it didn't sound right; some people use the "Mexicolt" but you can't change that to an equivalent for Mexican (Mexicoltian?), maybe the term Marexico and Marexican would have been better. I'm not hating on the story because of this, but "Manico" didn't sound right to me.
That's all I got to say, great story and I hope to see more.
The stomachs of the four hungry ponies that had skipped lunch making lunch growled sharply. Twilight was the first to break out laughing.
Shouldn't that be "five"? Unless you're counting that flower RD ate?
311182
I believe that "tortilla" and "tortilla shell" are interchangeable for the same thing. I know that personally I've always called flour tortillas tortilla shells because you also call an empty taco a taco shell. Weird bit of logic, but it makes sense to me.
As for the pun for Mexico, "Mane"ico was really the best I could come up with while still keeping the "ico" to become "ican food". It was probably just my lack of imagination/experience when coming up with pony puns.
Thanks for enjoying it! I'm probably going to end up writing more MLP one-shots because of this.
May the Grace of the Valar Protect You
Shire Folk
311199
Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy are the four ponies who skipped lunch making it.
May the Grace of the Valar Protect You
Shire Folk
311226
Sorry. I'm tired and my mind is still blown from today's episode. Excuse my idocy.
I want a burrito now. God damn it.
And now I'm hungry. Thanks!
Fuuuuck. I want a cheesy potato burrito now.
I want Chipotle.
BUT
I live in Germany.
weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/freddie-mercury-so-close-pose1.jpg
Give me a brohoof dude
Come on you know you want to
Making a story like this you deserve a brohoof so come on
Give the father of time a brohoof
312346
"Chapter 1"
"Complete"
What?
MOAR
Whaddaya think are the chances she'll go through all this effort to get one, then find out she doesn't like burritos...
Ah, well, I guess she did like it! Bahaha, silly me.
Yes, make more food chapters!
Please?
Why dose that pic make me think of Nyan Cat?
I wonder? What wuld Gassy_Mexican say if he saw this?
I love mexican food, my only exception is that if it isn't spicy I refuse to eat it
OH MY FUCKING GOD DAT COVER ART IS SO ADORABLE!!!!!!!
Now I want Mexican food
To bad i live in the middle of Kentucky
I hate mexican food. It gives me indigestion and even makes me feel like vomiting my lower intestines out my ass.
Fucking mexican food.
IM GOING TO DO A YOUTUBE READING ABOUT THIS TONIGHT. EXPECT IT TOMORROW!!!
https://www.youtube.com/user/ChaseWCanon/
311028 And then Twilight killed Princess Celestia
And Rarity and Spike got nothing.
The End