• Member Since 13th Jan, 2013

dziadek1990


Hobbyist writer and a math geek. Mostly writing dialogue-heavy super-short Slice-of-Life/Comedy comics (fimfics: a lot less)

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Found 557 stories in 342ms

Total Words: 9,451,386
Estimated Reading: 3 weeks

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This story is a sequel to Sleeping Arrangements


It's one thing to have a bodyguard as beautiful as she is deadly. It's another thing entirely to be hopelessly in love with her.


Part of the Bodyguard!AU Series, based on Earthsong9405's AU where Twilight is the bodyguard to a "Princess/Queen Rarity". Prior knowledge of the AU is not necessary to read the story, but some knowledge helps.

Chapters (2)
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Right Angle, Ponyville's resident building inspector, has seen a lot of strange domiciles in his life. Twilight Sparkle's castle, however, just might be the strangest.

The castle seems to think so, too.


Inspired by a discussion with the lovely Perfectly Insane. A big thank you to ChudoJogurt, gapty, and AllThatShimmers for prereading.

Ko-Fi. Y'know. If you feel like it.

Featured on Equestria Daily!

Chapters (1)
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Blueblood just wants to run his charity and be left alone, but High Society - and starry-eyed mares - have other plans.

He's not a good stallion, but maybe he's a better one than even he would guess. Now if only he'd stop being so cynical...

Chapters (10)
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Spike carries each of the most important ponies in his life home after a long day.

A commission-turned-gift for B_25

UPDATE: A Spanish language translation for Carry Me Home is now available, made by Spaniard Kiwi on his deviantart.

UPDATE (2024): Them's Writin' Words podcast did a wonderful review of this story. I appreciate all the thought and work put in to their critiques and all the kind words.

Chapters (7)
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Ever since moving to Ponyville, Twilight has neglected something: her other residence. The rooms she used in the Canterlot Archives are still filled with her possessions. It's been nearly a year, and the Archives want her to clear out already so the place can go to the new departmental librarian. She has until sunset -- or anything still there just might remain so. Spike, knowing the deadline is hours away from arriving, recruits the Bearers to help her.

But Twilight doesn't want help.

A deadline is in front of her, and she's -- stalling.

They have until sunset...


(Part of the Triptych Continuum, which has its own TVTropes page and FIMFiction group. New members and trope edits welcome.)

Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages.

Chapters (1)
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Twilight's power, along with that of Celestia, Luna, and Cadance, has been claimed by Tirek. Drunk on power, the demon-centaur is unleashing destruction upon Equestria, his reign of terror just beginning.

But there is hope. A crystalline chest, a gift from the Tree of Harmony, able to be opened by six keys. Keys which Twilight has now claimed the last of. All they can do is hope, hope that whatever is contained inside the chest is enough to stop Tirek.

And then something goes wrong ...


Note: This story is in no way connected with my other fanfics. It's very much a one-off in good fun.

Chapters (1)
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This story is a sequel to BY THE BLACK AXE OF NIGHTMARE MOON!


After an incident regarding Twilight's browser history, the truth comes out: she's far, far nerdier than her friends ever thought. With her secret found out, Twilight Sparkle must introduce her friends to the wide, strange world of Live Action Role Playing Games.

At least Sunset seems kind of interested?

Chapters (6)
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Discord has one friend. One. A single tie binding him to Equestria, a lone strand of pink tail hair keeping him in some sort of line. His interest in the world's welfare may exactly equal that of his friend's lifespan -- unless there's a next generation for him to adore. And so in the name of the realm's survival, Fluttershy is going to start dating, with Equestria's greatest expert in attracting ponies as her very reluctant prison-sentenced advisor. All Fleur has to do if she ever wants to come home again is get the world's most socially hesitant pony happily married off and pregnant, while constantly keeping Discord in the dark about what's truly happening.

What could possibly go wrong?




Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages. TVTropes entry can be found here.

Cover art by Harwick. Please contact him for commission rates.

Chapters (50)
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Scootaloo needs to talk about sex. Unfortunately, she goes to Twilight for help, and gets a lecture, instead.


(Possible unequivocal spoilers in comments)


And with a YouTube audio reading, apparently: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SUBgt876x8Y
They really nail the panic in Scootaloo's voice! I love it!

Chapters (1)