Alcohol. The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Sometimes people indulge.

Sometimes people overindulge.

Sometimes people get shit-faced whammered and write about cartoon horses in relationships.

Join us as Captain Unstoppable abuses his liver and writes some OTP for you and me, along with some side-pairings that we like. A series of prompts I gave him while he was drunk as a skunk. Written by him, polished up by me. Will update the next time Cap gets into the Angry Orchard.

Twilight Sparkle - magus, heroine and Princess - has learned of worlds overlapping Ungulatia in space and time. Though this has been a well known phenomenon, safely traveling to these other worlds has always eluded pony mages. But now - after years of research and careful experiments - she prepares herself for the most audacious of all experiments: stepping hoof on the surface of an alien world and returning safely! What wonders will she find once she walks through her magic portal?

This assumes that Equestria Girls never happened.

An ongoing collection of stories and poems too short for standalone FIMFic publication. NOT a scraps file — there are some contest winners in here! Contents, newest first:

The Pony Door [Crossover] – A cult leader, in their pursuit of secret truths, makes a startling discovery about the goddess(es) they are chasing. (8/2021)
Retirees [Drama] – Celestia and Luna have a plan for their post-princess days. Fifth place, "Through A Mirror Brightly" Writeoff! (3/2019)
The Shipper Is: IN [Random] [Romance] – Discord takes advantage of Cadance's metaromantic powers.
The Illusion Of Choice, Or Vice Versa [Drama] – A prodigious filly struggles with the burden of high expectations. Finalist, "Illusion of Choice" Writeoff! (10/2015)
Moon Bright [Slice of Life] – Two isolated farmers try to figure out how to react to Princess Luna's return. Third place, "The Morning After" Writeoff! (12/2016)
We Only Live Twice [Slice of Life] – When Bon Bon walked into her own funeral, that didn't shock us nearly so much as Lyra walking in alongside her. Tenth place, "It's Your Funeral" Writeoff (3/2016)
Charlotte's Goop [AU] [Crossover] [Comedy] – A changeling queen is leaving messages on Applejack's barn about her farm animals.
F=MC^2 [Alternate Universe] – The great and terrible road to the Manehattan Project.
Through The Fire And Flames [Random] [Comedy] [Equestria Girls] – Blue Oyster has a fever, and the only cure is a brainless minific.
The Slow Fall of an Unfamiliar Star [Sad] [Romance] [Human] – Sunset watches a sunset, alone with her memories. Eighth place, "Just Over The Horizon" writeoff (10/2014)
Eponalepsis [Slice of Life] [Far Future] – The immortals gather at Celestia's end, and debate forgiveness. 22nd place, "Famous Last Words" writeoff. "Highly Recommended" by Present Perfect! (8/2014)
Why I Left [Human] – A chance encounter at a failed pony convention. Eighth place, "Long Way Home" writeoff (6/2014)
Torn, Discarded Pages From An Old Notebook [Romance] [Adventure] – A young Twilight Sparkle writes about the adventures of a pony who is completely made up and imaginary. First place winner in the Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipfic Folder badfic contest! "Highly Recommended" by Present Perfect! (6/2014)
You, Ms. Harshwhinny, And A Pair Of Cougars Go On A Double Date [Random] – what
Night Mare's Party [Filk] – Luna's transformation vs. Oingo Boingo.
Alicornication [Filk] – Twilight Sparkle's ascension vs. the Red Hot Chili Peppers.
On Alicorn Fiction [Slice of Life] – Twilight has found plenty of nonfiction for her collection of Celestia's writings, but she's having a hard time finding any novels.
Deleted Scenes [Comedy] – Celestia introduces Luna to movies.
War Averted [Alternate Universe] – Cadence solves a problem.
From The Stars [Adventure] [Poem] – When a star falls upon ancient Equestria, a filly journeys to save what remains of her tribe.
Breaking The News [Comedy] – Ponyville prepares for disaster. (Published in the Everfree NW 2013 conbook!)

A collection of short stories. A little bit of this, a little bit of that. All, hopefully, about what it means to be human.

Except, you know, with ponies.

I'm afraid of Changeling: Drone 42531 is insecure and decides he needs to see a professional, whether or not the professional wants to see him. [Comedy] [Random]

One thousand and one: A family keeps a long vigil, regardless of the cost. [Sad]

Uncoordinated: Twilight Sparkle and the Cutie Mark Crusaders conduct an experiment. Accidentally. [Comedy] [Random]

But the Greatest of These: Every pony has to grow up someday. Every dragon, too. [Slice of Life]

Wonder: Pinkie Pie's farm is grey. The sky is grey. Her sister is grey. The world is grey. Until, one day, it isn't. [Slice of Life]

The Apple of my Eye: Apple Bloom finally gets her cutie mark. It's not what she wanted. [Comedy] [Random]

Bookworm: Twilight Sparkle finds an odd message in her books. [Dark]

At the End of the Day: Just what does Pinkie Pie do in her free time? [Slice of Life]

The House at the End of the World: Some promises shouldn't be kept. [Adventure] [Dark]

Pantone Perfect: Rarity and Twilight Sparkle enjoy a refreshing argument at the spa. [Comedy] [Random]

Medium Rare: In which we learn the secret, scarring horror that was Fluttershy's first experience with a dragon. [Comedy] [Random]

One Thousand Flowers: How long do gifts take to grow? [Slice of Life]

Tempest: A pegasus teaches his son the nature of the rain. [Slice of Life]

No Natural Predators: The days have grown longer as the world winds down. [Adventure] [Dark]

Six More Weeks: The first day of Spring is a wonderful time to be a pony. Just make sure you get the date right. [Comedy]

Derecho: A daughter starts a long quest in a forgotten city.[Slice of Life]

O Death, where is thy sting? Human Flash Sentry travels across the multiverse. [Adventure]

The Lotus Eaters: Heaven is different things to different people. A Friendship is Optimal vignette.[Slice of Life]

Tour of Duty: Duty can be lighter than a feather, or heavier than a mountain. [Slice of Life]

Nickel-Iron-Cobalt: An explorer discovers a world without life. Perhaps. [Anthro][Adventure]

(Based on prompts from the Thirty Minute Pony Stories tumblr. All written in 30 minutes – give or take – unless otherwise noted.)

There's a story behind every Magic card, but they probably don't have quite as many ponies in them as these do. Set throughout Equestrian probability space, each of these stories was inspired by a card chosen through Gatherer's Random Card function. As such, categories and characters will vary.

Done for One-Shotober.

Can the Twilight October evade the clutches of the Equestrian navy and bring glory to the Motherland?

When trust is betrayed and ideals are discarded, does the Twilight October have what it takes to survive?

Also, Pinkie is a shark.

In an Equestria where it is more than okay to be gay, Roseluck finds herself without a special somepony of her own. However, change in the form of an earnest, yet odd, quills and sofas salespony is on the way. The only problem is this: he's a stallion. And Roseluck's no filthy breeder, is she?

A commission for T_K_21.
Featured on Equestria Daily.

Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo swap bodies. What could possibly go wrong?

Wallace and Gromit go to the moon for a picnic. They find a lonely pony, a lovestruck robot, and an incredibly cheesy life-lesson.

Rated E for Englishness.

Featured on Equestria Daily as of 22nd January 2014!

Saw some Wallace & Gromit pony art. Then this happened. Enjoy!
Thanks to Mr101 and Craine for pre-reading.

During a lull in the conversation at an upper class charity dinner, Rarity takes a moment to contemplate some commonly held assumptions made of Princess Celestia. Specifically, her table manners.