• Member Since 26th Sep, 2011
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Forget not that I am a derp.



There's a story behind every Magic card, but they probably don't have quite as many ponies in them as these do. Set throughout Equestrian probability space, each of these stories was inspired by a card chosen through Gatherer's Random Card function. As such, categories and characters will vary.

Done for One-Shotober.

Chapters (32)
Comments ( 482 )

:facehoof: I can't believe I didn't catch that reference the first time.
Great story though, I liked it.:twilightsmile:

I want to rewatch that scene with derpy but I can't find it anywhere for free.

Totally agree. They're basically monsters. Sonata's a cute monster, but a monster nonetheless.

Also, Ditzy knows all about magic horses running around loose because she met one once. As I recall, said grey pegasus in disguise made a waspish comment about how the Multiverse was conspiring to make her look like an idiot.

How cool that your first random draw is so relevant to current events.

Also that it picked a card old enough for me to recognize. I think I've got a play deck with one of those in it!

Oh my goodness, someone used Raspberry Fluff! :pinkiehappy:
I am seeing a lot of fics where Sonata breaks free of Aria and Adagio, and I love it! :pinkiesmile:

What is this a crossover of?

Magic: the Gathering. Not sure it really needs a crossover tag, but it looks like it's going to share a continuity with his other stories which heavily used elements from Magic. If that's the case then it definitely merits the crossover tag, since Ditzy and Pinkie are both Planeswalkers.

I got a fevah, and the only cua is moa cowbell! :coolphoto: (Or Discord, in the next chapter.)

This one hasn't been taken down as of this posting.

Yeah, Jordan convinced me on that one. Sonata has the ignorant bliss of someone who has others to do her thinking for her. Without the other sirens, she's trapped in a world that changes too fast for her to even think of keeping up. She only figured out beepers last year! :applejackconfused:

I'm actually not sure whether or not this story is EoH-verse canon, though it certainly works. I'm considering how 'walker Ditzy might deal with the sirens, and I don't want it to be just "Wow, those are some nice black mana nexuses around your necks" and a triple Disenchant.

It's a fine name. However, I had to use Blue Oyster for the cowbell player.

Well, that's it for Mix-and-match monster.

5086669 Yeah....coming up to them and yelling "YOINK!!!" doesn't make for much in the way of tension.....:rainbowlaugh:

The terastodon is no more. It's framed and hanging on my wall.

Eh. She'll come around. I make sure they always do. :rainbowkiss: Well-written otherwise.

Sadly, that's not the reason I'm here. I can't let this stay in the EQG group in good conscience if it's going to be a miniscule part of a 30-ish story anythology. Nothing personal, either; this is a new rule in response to a situation that's never come up until now, and not the only story I've applied it to. If you wish to turn the Sonatafic into its own story entry and add it, that's perfectly fine!

Apologies, and best of luck with the rest of your project. :twilightsmile:

Oh, no offense taken. After all, I'm not the one who put it in there. Nor any of the other EQG groups people have been sticking the story into. :trixieshiftleft: Really, this hasn't been a case of jumping the gun so much as pole-vaulting the Howitzer.


:rainbowlaugh: Fair enough. I'm on a curating spree now so I've been taking the weed-whacker to a bunch of stuff.

"Are we just ignoring the part where she ate pe—"
Ditzy shook her head. "Not the time, Razz."

I lost it. :pinkiehappy:

Sweet character interpretation. I like it! (but Sonata's cuteness is so delightful when you ignore the fact that she's a monster. . . . hm. . . .) But seriously, great job with the story. You really portrayed Sonata's frustration toward Adagio and bewilderment at Ditzy's optimism and cluelessness as to what to do next well.

"And she was said she'd bake us apology muffins if this didn't work."

Derpy spoke, a bit more anxious than before.

"Was" should be deleted and "Derpy" should be "Ditzy", if you care about typos in these little oneshots.

Thanks. I knew there would be plenty of stories focusing on what I'll call "the waifu factor." I wanted to offer a counterpoint before people completely forgot that the Dazzlings were literal monsters. Characterizing Ditzy's bandmates was also fun.

And there is no story so short that I won't care about typos. However, I greatly appreciate that your comment wasn't just correction. Thanks for that. :pinkiehappy:

I haven't seen EQG:RR (I hate those crappy cinema cam versions) and I can't tell if this is spoilery or not so I don't know whether I can safely read it >_<

Looking it over, there are a few spoilery bits. However, this is a compilation. Just skip "Fish Out of Water" until you see the movie. The other two have nothing to do with the technicolor monkey universe.

(Note that there will be one other story set around Rainbow Rocks, and it will be entitled "Rock On." Just a heads up.)

Ok, this is simply great. Although now I want a story from ***** ****'s point of view :-P

Twi should also comment on how her teacher has no sense of humor......:rainbowlaugh:

Loving this series, and especially the challenge of trying to armchair deduce what card was chosen before I reach the end. So far I've gotten exactly zero right, but it's fun to try!

> Let's stop and think about that one for a moment. Twilight Sparkle thinks you're working too hard. If that isn't a warning sign, I don't know what is.

Truer words were never spoken.

Also, I am vaguely amused that every manticore in canon is now named "Manny". That was the name of the one that befriended Celestia and Luna in "The Journal Of The Two Sisters," too.

"I have no idea what's going on right now, but this chair is comfortable and ponies are listening to Fluttershy. Works for me."

Oh, Celestia has a sense of humor. It just goes numb around Discord. NaN years of utter madness are going to leave a bad impression.

Huh. Manny Roar is the manticore equivalent of John Smith. Good to know.

Actually, I thought the card was a VERY somewhat mean spirited granny smith :-P

5095676 I can think of another usually jovial figure who's the same way around a character portrayed by De Lancie..

Faving just for this chapter (though I'll get around to reading the others eventually) because dude. Speaking as someone with the Dazzlings as my current icon... I love what you did here. All the Sonata redemption fics out there are all well and good, but it's nice to see someone who recalls that she's also evil. Part of what makes her character so great, in fact; she can really go either way and it would make sense. Good on you for taking her on the other path. :pinkiehappy:

Ohgod I feel sorry for poor Joaquim.

Also Cheerilee's reaction is a bit harsh. I mean, the children learnt things! Maybe not good things, but they learned them! :-P

Innocence is a myth born of nostalgia. You've seen Diamond Tiara. There is no cruelty like that of a child.

And no destructiveness like that of a Scootachicken.

"Hey, what's this do?"

Words you never want to hear a Crusader utter.

It's only missing the part where he rises from his grave and goes on a rampage. :trixieshiftright:

5100449 you mean famous last words.

Honestly? I expected a 'Scootaloo dies a bunch' reference, but this is okay, too.

The Sparkle-Adjusted Ponyville Disaster Scale needs to be a Thing.

Is the scale geometric, exponential, or logarithmic? I'm picturing the latter, kind of like the Richter scale for earthquakes; the notion that disasters span ten orders of magnitude, and the flower sisters panic at events that barely register on the disastrometer, is just too plausible.

Oh, she loved Apple Syrup with all her heart. She just didn't want Mac striving for an ideal he's already surpassed without knowing it.

I knew the sirens would be the second coming of changelings in terms of redemption stories. I figured we'd need a counterpoint early in the process, lest everyone forget just how evil those three actually are in canon.


Spirit, not Zombie. :raritywink:

Huh. I hadn't considered Scootaloo Dies At The End at all when writing this, but I can certainly see how you'd think that. Still, Discord was there, and the only thing he likes less than death is dead children. All that potential, wasted? Not on his watch.

You know, it's funny. I was actually writing out the details of the SAPDS before telling myself, "No, no, this is just too dorky" and deleting them. I should've known better.
In any case, yes, the scale is logarithmic. Note that the "Sparkle-Adjusted" means adjustments made both by Twilight and for her. She did usher in interesting times, after all.

5100670 Thoughts exactly.

Well, you've given the world a sequel hook.....

Too bad you didn't get Badlands as a card!

Clearly I need to brush up on my undead taxonomy. Pretty sure the 'going on a rampage' part is mandatory for revenants, though.

(Yes, I know he doesn't have rampage. Hush.)

So, in the end, these guys were right:

Some look at it pragmatically. The Shades, they say, are terrible, but they are a concentrated terror, a contained one. Were Celestia to stamp them out, future creatures of fell darkness might not seek a haven, but try to create one wherever they find themselves. By removing the Shades, Celestia might be inflicting their darkness on the rest of Equestria.

In a manner of speaking :-P

Most of the siren stories so far aren't this well-written. Green-thumbed.

Nicol Bolas will bite your head off for suggesting there's an older dragon than him.

And the flavor of Rolling Earthquake is so suspect. "An earthquake! Good thing I'm nice and stable up here on my horse!"

Oh, boy. An influx of angry refugees who think the worst of their hosts. This would also be an interesting idea for a larger story.

A giant monster named Behemoth who dwells in the bowels of the earth... why do I keep thinking of Worm?

Why do I think that he and Valencia died of a case of the stupids?

I expect a fair number of these to be lead-ins for more involved stories that I'm not going to have time to write. My creative process in a nutshell, really. :derpytongue2:

Oh, Granny Smith would nip that right in the bud.
"Apple Syrup, you stop all that wailin' and move on this minute!"
"Yes, Momma."
"That's a good colt."

As we all know, "in a manner of speaking" is Cryptic Mentor for, "I could tell you more, but it would make your head explode." So, yes, in a manner of speaking.

High praise, given the source. Thank you, sir. :twilightsmile:

It's in Ungula. He's willing to give the upstart a pass, given that Pinkie Pie is still there.
Also, yeah, Rolling Earthquake doesn't make much sense, which is why it's perfect for causing international incidents.

It was certainly an inspiration, but Discord isn't a space whale, and no bullied fillies are going to develop bug-control powers.

You two have put probability space through the ringer more than enough for one day.

I believe you meant 'wringer'.

"Your head got so feathering swelled


:ajsleepy: Son, I am disappoint.

That said, Dash is probably one of those rare few individuals that could make a kismessitude between themselves work.

Also this chapter was particularly good. I wonder what it is about Rainbow Rocks that gives such a good reaction...

especially when he wants to distinguish herself from her locsl counterpart.

Your grammar fairy betrayed you here, methinks.

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