• Member Since 18th Aug, 2017
  • offline last seen June 3rd

Witchrblizzad


Feel free to ask for feedback everyone! Also Luna, Sunset , Vinyl and Flutter shy are the best.

T

A shove, pushing, thrown projectiles and hateful words. All seem to be having a field day with CHS. For the last week, this is all Sunset Shimmer has known. Ever since this Anon-a-miss had started her life had been hell. It had gotten to the point where some days she didn't even get through the day.  

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 79 )

Wait, the story repeats itself after the first instance of Fluttershy receiving the letter.

I would like to point out that everything after this line

“Now.” Luna had the mic again. “I would like you to see what your actions caused, seeing as you were not around when these events took place Anon-a-miss.”

Up through Fluttershy reading the 'Goodbye', is repeated a second time.

8785529
I noticed that too might want to fix that.

Still, this one hits the heart with sadness :pinkiesad2:

Heartwrenching. Also, the last few paragraphs copied themselves, making it repeat.

8785529 Yeah, I noticed that myself.

Here's hoping that the author will fix that before long, as it's a bit distracting.

Otherwise, great story.

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Wow can't believe i missed that! thanks for pointing it out

This is some Grade-A wangst you got here.

well girls i hope it was worth it. sunsets dead, and the three of you probably are never going to see the outside of prison, lets see given the internet act and the bullying trickle down effect we have...

identity theft one count
physical harassment (... gonna just attempt to ballpark it here) thirty six confirm-able counts
physical assault too many counts
public deformation
fragrant misuse of government resources and properties (funny fact, school computers owned by the school/district which is considered part of the government)
and oh yes, premeditated manslaughter in first second and third degree.

yeah never mind the whole 'tried as adults tried as children' argument, your pretty much going to get out of juvenile hall, directly onto a bus for prison.

Well, CMC, I hope you all are satisfied. You destroyed a girl’s life and drove her to suicide just because you were jealous and didn’t want to stop. So enjoy your free trip to prison, ladies!

With all these suicide stories it spawned, I REALLY don't want to read that comic now. At least the Forgotten Friendship episode has Sunset coming through it better than ever, from what I heard. And the CMC are behind it? Here we thought what their pony counterparts did in Ponyville Confidential was bad.

(Not hating on this story or any others like it just so you know, and I did read it)

8785747
The only difference I see with Anon-a-miss and Pony Confidential is that Diamond Tiara blackmailed the CMC in PC and the CMC did Anon-a-miss themselves. No blackmail in that.

8785607 For my part, you're very welcome.

I like to help out where I can.

8785840
That makes it even worse that they'd do something like that on their own. I know comics are separate continuity from the show, but still. It sounds almost as bad as Chrysalis killing a kitten in Issue 3. (Oh, if Sunset found out about that, we know she loves kittens as much as I do)

8785840
Actually diamond only blackmailed them when they tried to stop. The whole Gabby Gums thing was entirely the CMC's idea.

8785867
don't forget the hypocrisy of the ponies

you should have had Twilight rip the traitors a new one

also out of curiosity what do you mean by "expelled indefinitely"

CAN'T WAKE UP

Seriously, though. What did I just read and how was I able to predict from the fucking tags that Sunset would straight up kill herself? Oh right, because that's the obvious way to go about things.

Not to mention the fact that this is hilariously unrealistic and just serves to bully Sunset into submission in order for the audience to feel sympathy for her. I'm sorry, but you can't just fire someone and kick them out of an apartment because they're a supposed "bully". That's not how the law works and that landlord/manager would probably end up receiving jail time.

I understand what you were attempting to do, but this is straight up completely and utterly abusive to a character because people thought she was Anon-A-Miss. Not knew, assumed. Nobody would go this far to drive someone to suicide unless they knew for sure, let alone an entire school.

Also:

“As far as punishment goes, those that physically harassed Sunset will be have an out of school suspension for two months, then given three more months of in-school suspension and after-school detention. Those that uploaded to Anon-a-miss will be given three months of in-school suspension and detention. Those that verbally harassed Sunset Shimmer will be given six months of detention and with have privileges stripped away. Finally Anon-a-miss themselves will be expelled indefinitely and handed to the police.” Outrage filled the auditorium. The loudest was the sisters of Sweetie Belle, Apple Bloom and Scootaloo.

This is not how school suspension works. I once physically assaulted a teacher and got two weeks suspension at most. You're not going to get a 2-3 month suspension for assaulting a student, even if it indirectly drove them to suicide. Especially since the entire school was in on this harassment. Does that mean that the entire student base is just straight up barred from the school? They're losing a whole TWO MONTHS of school over this.

This entire story is in this bizarro universe where one minute everyone hates Sunset Shimmer then when she fucking kills herself, suddenly everyone gives a fucking shit. If she was hated THAT MUCH, NOBODY would give a damn. But for the sake of garnering audience sympathy, everyone now feels bad.

And yes, suicide is a serious issue and shouldn't be handled lightly and there was at least an attempt at writing a good story here, but nothing makes sense and it all comes off as some young person thinks bullying is, or what would happen if someone killed themselves due to bullying. This is absurd, even for Equestria Girls.

I would say this was wasted potential, but there's probably at least another 30 stories with this same idea due to how often people source the Anon-A-Miss story-line for cheap drama and an easy way to establish a bullying motive. You know what the worst part is? This isn't even close to the damage bullying can do. This is straight up assaulting someone and should have been taken care of as soon as possible, not giving the students fucking 2 month suspensions AFTER SHE KILLS HERSELF. WHAT GOOD DOES THAT DO FOR ANYONE?

Alright, alright. I'm being too harsh. But this story is so overdone and it's handed so poorly and with leaps in logic that would make a frog blush, I can't say I liked this. Others might because they get emotionally invested in the drama and ignore the glaring logical flaws, and that's fine, whatever. But just know that there's massive logical flaws in the story. We all have our vices and that's okay.

Poor Sunset. Aka Trixie 2.0

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im using the other definition of indefinitely. "to an unlimited or unspecified degree or extent." Celestia has made their expulsion public for all the world to see. Much like they did with everyone's secrets.

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Thats perfectly fine, I can understand the flaws you pointed out and I respect your opinion. I will take this into account the next time a write a story. Thank you for the feed back.

8786004
Yeah, sorry about going full nerd rage. Wasted potential is my pet peeve.

8786054
its understandable. I actually like getting feedback like this.

I think its safe to say the Friendship Games are canceled. Because I don't think even Cinch would go through with them after this. Let alone the school board.

So with that, I don't think we have to worry about any more magical disasters. Unless of course Princess Twilight does not obliderate the mirror and then throw whatever's left into a black hole, and Sci Twi stumbles through.

But that's a whole nother thing.

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They didn't hate her that much, they just acted stupid, and blinded themselves to what was going on. anger and stupidity mixed together can do this.

They also Assume Sunset was faking or wasn't that badly affected so, yeah yeah I know but even a lesser level of bullying can lead to the target taking their lives in real life.
But the rest yeah it was way too out there, thou yes the sisters getting arrested could happen, thou should of had Twilight scream at the three elder sisters for being hypocrites, they defend their sisters for being arrested and expelled but they easily turn their backs on Sunset?

Should had a bit with Twilight ripping in them, and maybe thier magic leaving them suddenly and painfully.

geb

It’s good.

What I enjoyed about it was that while it did reinforce some of the problems that some people have with Sunset being suicidal it didn't push the readers face into it, it brought it up, and explained how it was led to. But other than that it was decently set up.

Sure it's unethical and immoral to fire someone from a job or kick them out due to bullying a relative, but the problem is that if she's an illegal alien then that means that she doesn't really have any rights. Which is sad for her but it's the truth.

Thats one of the things I liked. Another thing was that it wasn't something big that set her off, it was all the little things that just kept building and building till she couldn't take it.

I liked it
the issue is I feel its too rushed should have been longer.
id say rework it to be longer. the ending needs work XD
like it feels like it suddenly stops. i would have loved to have seen the aftermath of this.

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yeah i get it. im planning on making a sequel

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If you do make a sequel can you have someone point out to the three older sisters what hypocrites they are?
As they protested their little sisters being arrested, but it was Sunset they would cheered for it.

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yeah, planning on it for sure. I think Shy and Twi is gonna be te ones to do it

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Heck, I can’t help but wonder if those three had wanted the CMC to get off scotfree without any punishment.

8814634 Thankfully, I've read some fics where the opposite happened, and AJ, Rarity and Dash ripped heir little sisters a new one once they found out/figured out that they were the ones who were (are?) actually behind Anon-a-Miss.

Heck, in one of the aforesaid fics, Rarity actually even kicked Sweetie out of the Boutique, and sent her back to live with their parents full time, she was so mad at her.

8837848
I meant in this story.

I seen those fanfics. Especially the one at the end: Rarity told Sweetie Belle that she wasn’t going to let her stay if she wasn’t going to respect her or her friends.

A little quick there. Especially the ending there. Twilight was like hi bye which felt hollow. Meh could of been better

8844216
She's sticking around for now, Im gonna make a sequel eventually

You may want to parse this through a grammar and spell checker. There were a few words that were off, like a misspelling of immediate. There are also spots where it looks like you forgot or misplaced the quotation marks. Those errors aside it was pretty good.

8844588
When the sequel be out?

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i don't know, im working on getting a few new stories out first.

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I can honestly say that I always find the Trixie 2.0 thing odd, they are similar if you boil it down to using an artifact for power but beyond that they have little in common other than being reformed and female.

8785973
I agree man. Anon-a-Miss is really hard to do well, and is often a cheap excuse for scuicide stories.

Omg! I AM OUTRAGED! I HOPE YOU THREE SUFFER THE GUILT!!! (I am a biased Sunny fan, bite me!) but this was really good! Nice job!

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