• Published 23rd Jul 2012
  • 3,786 Views, 85 Comments

Misinterpreted - Twifight Sparkill

Ponyville residents consider Rainbow Dash to be a careless and lackadaisical pegasus. They couldn't be more wrong.

  • ...

Her Truest Loyalty

Misinterpretedby Twifight Sparkill

The morning struck as a burgeoning welcome, issuing all things living and willing towards its warming beacon. Deep pearled reds and oranges gave way to the brightest yellow-whites, and soon dawn prevailed over shadow whilst played against a blossoming blue backdrop.

Today was clear and endlessly serene – perfection. Here remained a bathed turquoise void that had no rival, just daring someone to traverse its deceptive calm; winds, drafts, all manner of chaotic movements threatened to maul whoever defiled this almighty expanse – only a fool would accept such a perilous endeavor, surely.

High up in the clouds above Ponyville stood a sole cyan pegasus, up since before dawn as ever, prepared to defy the yawning unknown regardless of any obvious danger. From her cumulus precipice, she peered down at the vast countryside miles below, wearing a trademark cocksure smile.

The mare's heartbeat began to quicken with restless anticipation – she carefully drew back from the cloud's edge, sucked a deep breath in between gritted teeth, and held it.

"All right, Rainbow Dash," she exhaled heavily. "Here we go again."

She raised her left wing – check: pollex pointed, primary and secondary remiges aligned, vanes prominent and straight. Right wing: check.

Now the only thing left was... too late. Her hooves had already begun moving. She condensed and streamlined, then threw herself at the yawning emptiness with vigorous resolve – it was definitely too late for secondary checks or fleeting thoughts of turning back now, damn 'em anyway.

Without resistance, she committed before able to manage another full breath.

"Wahoo-ooo!" Rainbow cried in a choked glee, striking the breathtaking canvas with a near perverse excite. The rushing air tore mercilessly past, a signature spectrum trail painted brightly behind, as she dropped headlong from the heavens.

She plummeted towards the awaiting ground at breakneck speed for an alarming length of time – every sense tingled as they were left ripped and whipped by oncoming winds; whether there were gusts or squalls, whether breezes, gales, storms, hurricanes or typhoons, nothing had ever stood to deter the pegasus from her truest and greatest passion: speed. Today wouldn't be any different.

Laughing all the way down, Dash eventually had to relent – that or go splat – unfurling her feathered appendages against the violent pressure screaming past at a painful velocity. The sudden shock hurled her upwards, snapping her body with a whiplash that left Rainbow seeing stars. She'd feel that in the morning, undoubtedly.

Speed: in kinematics, the speed of an object is the magnitude of its velocity (the rate of change of its position); it is thus a scalar quantity. The average speed of an object in an interval of time is the distance traveled by the object divided by the duration of the interval. The instantaneous speed is the limit of the average speed as the duration of the time interval approaches zero – this explanation, something Dash could likely recite in her sleep, mattered the most since it was her constant and addictive require.

There was simply nothing that could compare, neither love nor want or drive that would ever touch the unrelenting ecstasy of going really fast – the frightening disorientation; the rapid rushing towards what would be a messy demise if even the slightest miscalculation were made. All the more reason to toss caution aside and embrace the unknown.

This wasn't some death wish, to clarify; more of a solemn vow to live life to its fullest every chance she got.

Once upon a rightly adjusted flight path, Rainbow Dash steadied her frantic thrashing and opted for a languid glide, taking a moment to consider the sights. At this immense height, she nearly felt free from the oppressive pull of the world below. She'd succeeded thus far in her defiant struggle against the inevitable earth, staying well away from the reminder as much as possible save to meet up with her beloved friends or to visit Sugarcube Corner for treats, yum. Certainly, once time had removed her physical abilities, she'd be forced to walk upon the hard ground – until then, forget it. Stupid, selfish soil! Though its beckon was akin to an intoxicating siren song, this high up her ears were filled with the oncoming slap of rushing eluvium. No consequence.

Having properly stretched her wings, albeit left chaffed and wanton, Rainbow Dash began her warm-up routine with a few easy aerial acrobatics – a loop here, a barrel roll there. After that, she would be dutifully committed to imitating the appropriate stratagems perpetrated by her idols, Equestria's illustrious Wonderbolts: during their winter training, the pegasi squadron would fly two conditioning sessions per day, six days a week, in order to manage their 192 annual aerial exhibitions safely. The separation between the formation of bodies and their maneuver altitude would be gradually relaxed over the course of about two months – suppressing the possibility of wings crossing, mistakes being made, and a potential for injuries due to the progression of fatigue.

The team would continue to revise until the grand opening of their show season in Canterlot's illustrious Sky Auditorium. From there, they would then fly to their various show venues throughout Equestria, conducting circle-and-arrival orientation maneuvers until reaching their predetermined destinations. Never stopping, never losing a moment to improve their already clinical precision.

There simply was no rest in the life of a Wonderbolt, that was well understood – to be the very elite, you must present perfection every moment of every day that your wings dare touch so much as a draft.

Today's routine, a month before summer, would consist of a moderate attune as before the Fall's finale – inverted and aileron rolls, minimum radius turns, horizontal rolls, sneak trot pass low alongside the imagined spectators at high speed. Possible Sonic Rainboom, if she still had the strength.

All these patterns and plays she'd performed solely for the purpose to one day be amongst the best of the best, which was her driving desire for as long as she could ever remember. Rainbow Dash had tirelessly researched all aspects of the team's rituals over years of scrutiny, studying every facet and nuance – Daring Do was most certainly not her first literary love, despite what certain other ponies were led to assume. They were good books, though, no deny.

What truly mattered, one might ask? Her answer would be simple: it was the hours she dedicated, fluid unremitting spans spent shaving precious seconds and risking everything to refine and reproduce daunting aeronautical feats consummately, all accomplished at an obscenely disturbing pace – that's what actually mattered to her.

It even disrupted her mental presence, making it hard to concentrate on the trivial things, like... remembering how to do the Pony Pokey. Or Rarity's birthday. She loved her friends dearly and would do anything for them, but this nearly debaucherous drive domineered her: improvement, investigation, dissection, reinterpretation, then flawless unyielding execution.

Others were passably aware of the desire, but they'd never understand the truest parts – the ones that Rainbow couldn't control anymore. All those scrapes, the bandages, contusions and bruises – oh, that was just Rainbow Dash being clumsy again. No, it wasn't her constantly pushing a battered, breaking body to impossible limits every day ad infinitum for being hopelessly addicted – of course not. It was just another unfortunate accident. Yeah, silly ol' Rainbow. That'd been a far more acceptable explanation.

It had to be – nopony else would ever understand her drive. She barely did herself, honestly.


The day's precious time had slipped away before Dash ever noticed, and not a moment too soon – with no proper measure to determine what she'd emotionally and physically committed since the skies turned from dark to inviting pink to now highest noontime. All that she could muster now was the insisting need to cease and desist.

Every inch of her body ached terribly; her hide completely soaked and matted, her head pounded as if to burst, her eyes left bloodshot and bleary – she was having difficulty drawing a proper breath again. This was admittedly the only way she could stop these days.

Rest or death, whatever came first. Ad infinitum, as ever.

Finding the nearest cloud before she literally fell out of the sky from exhaustion, Rainbow landed flat upon it before succumbing to merciful unconsciousness. Another self-immolating day completed – that was her reward for now, and it had to be enough.

She didn't know how long it would take to be considered a candidate for the Wonderbolts. She wasn't sure she had much time left before her poor body gave out altogether for trying – it didn't matter though, honestly. She would be patient with this if nothing else. Her most precious dream; the only thing she was ever truly loyal to before becoming the elemental embodiment...

... perhaps even afterward, which quietly terrified her.


Pinkie Pie bounced along a park trail outside Ponyville, humming a nondescript tune that'd popped in her head that morning in the bakery – she'd eventually put proper words to it, but for now, it was just too catchy to ignore. "Hm-hmm hm hm hm HMM hm hm hm hmmm," she sang, addressing the beautiful noonday sun with a bright smile. "All I really need is a simile... a soda... a sack of socks in a sauce... I'm on to something," she mused.

Rarity happened to be walking the same path coincidentally, approaching from the opposite direction.

"Good afternoon, darling!" she chimed, waving to Pinkie once within earshot. "Where are you off to this fine day, hmm?"

Pinkie came to an abrupt halt before nearly bowling the alabaster unicorn over.

"Hiya Rarity! I'm looking for Rainbow Dash, have you seen her anywhere? We're supposed to be helping Twilight organize her super new book delivery! It's really really important to Twilight – after I offered to help, she insisted that I bring somepony else along for... what is it she said again? Hm... oh, right. Damage control! I think that's actually some special code for something," she giggled, wriggling her eyebrows. "Super-duper sleuth stuff, yannow? Maybe Twilight expects a ninja attack? That'd be great! Ninja party!"

Rarity blinked a few times.

"I'll... help you find Rainbow Dash, dear," she managed. Pinkie nodded vigorously in approval.

The two began to check the sky for their colorful friend, Rarity finally spying Rainbow adrift on a small cloud some distance away.

"Oh, there she is." Rarity pointed, indicating the dozing Dash. "Doesn't it figure that she would be sleeping at this hour? Honestly, I love the girl dearly, but she's easily the most lethargic pegasus I know!"

"Yeppers!" Pinkie agreed, nodding. "If I know one thing for sure, it's that Rainbow Dash is a seriously lazy pony!"

The End.

Author's Note:

• The gracious Seattle's Angels review can be found here, analyzed by Belligerent Sock, Scribble Stick, and Nick Nack.

• Find the very ambitious live reading of this choking tome via The Living Library Player Society here. This complicated piece is narrated by FreeHomeBrew, with the parts of Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Pinkie Pie voiced expertly by the talented ShadowPaint.

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Comments ( 85 )

I liked reading it! :pinkiehappy:

I think I learnt something reading this. I'm just not sure what. Big words, big words everywhere. :applejackconfused:
Either way, you successfully justified the one link I had to Rainbow Dash, her laziness. Curse you. :fluttercry:
Great job! :moustache:

957535, 957548

Hello! Thanks so much for dropping by and commenting on the second story I've ever written - sadly, I am left feeling I have a lot to learn about writing, ugh.

I really appreciate the encouraging words, I really do! I think I'll stick to silly pony stories though. I don't think I'm cut out for... this. You know? I tried though! That's what counts!

:rainbowhuh: - Now that I think about it, I guess I am pretty lazy.

957733 If the story was good, then I think you do have talent. Keep it up!

Echoing voidless' comment, I think it was good! :rainbowkiss: Rather unique as well, the show chooses not to touch on the fact that while she may be the most athletic of the group, she is also the laziest, two polar opposites. You explained it well, and if the writers needed an explanation to it, I have no doubt they'd go down this route. Still, you should write what you enjoy, it turns out better for both the readers and the author. But practise is practise, so this story might have helped you in the long run. :pinkiehappy:

Look at me, trying to give advice. I've never done that. :applejackunsure:

957758, 957860

You two make me very happy. Thank you.

:pinkiehappy: - Makes a girl wanna cry! Oh wait, that's my hangover! Word to the wise guys, never drink and write. Once you get behind the keyboard, LIVES ARE AT STAKE! Always use a designated typist! Remember - DON'T DRINK AND PUBLISH!

Seriously though, way humbled and flattered! YAY! MADE MY DAY!

This was good! Kinda reminds me of myself in some ways... Certainly explains why she's sleeping all the time. It's funny though, using such an advanced vocabulary to describe Dash. Not to say that she's stupid, just thats she's a little more...

*equips sunglasses*

Down to earth...


An interesting piece of descriptive verse. Certainly, the tones and mood of freedom aren't lost on the bulk of the work. You've managed to capture a rather good interpretation of the duology of Dash's nature. The split between illustration and exegesis was well balanced, I felt, and it's really nothing more than a good photograph of scenery wrapped around a loose idea - which is what all good fiction should be.

My only complaint would be that Pinkie's dialogue didn't seem to be something I could hear her say, but that is nitpicking to extreme levels. Otherwise, keep it up!


Thanks so much for reading and liking my stories! Leaving comments really means a lot to me. You're awesome, Red. I see you reading alot of the stories I like, so this means EVEN MORE to me, as you've got great taste! Check out two great stories I think you'd like - Austraeoh and On the Edge of a Cliff. Also that joke was terrible. See you around!


Hey KitsuneRisu! Wow, it's ages now since we talked. Thanks for coming by! I have to disagree with you on Pinkie - and I hate to, seeing as we're practically sisters you & me - I think she's perfectly annoying as she is. You're such a crazy Pinkie fan! Sigh! So amusing. Be well, girlfriend!

:pinkiehappy: - U MAD?


Yes, well, I do so love the Pinkie. She makes my ovaries twitch.



I suddenly don't miss you as much.

This was genuinely fun. And I plan to rely on some variation of it next time somepony accuses me of being indolent.


Thank you, Dusty! I'd lost faith in writing a serious story really, now... now I'm so happy! YEE!

:pinkiesmile: - Comedy still rules though!

Pretty good. I'll be waiting for more from you.

Ah, just completing this story made me feel more intelligent heh. Though i can't shake the feeling something is missing, as if more could be added, nonetheless it was a good read and i enjoyed it to the end. Once again good work.


You're right, of course.

I admit that when I jumped on ideas during my first stories, they were barely thought out - i'd literally just sit and write whatever craziness came to mind. I've since been taught, by a very good friend, that I should slow down and perhaps consider the most important question most ask of a story - WHY? As in, this exists and is of importance because of..? WELL!?

I appreciate your reading and liking my silly word marathons. You're good stuff. Charitable to a fault! Cheers!

It has so many words I can barely remember the definition of!



Another satisfied customer!

I made most of those words up, eh. Lazy, lazy me.

Why does this appear in my "not-read" section every once in a while? Have you been changing something?


I was forced to do a major re-edit for having the entirety dissected, then I changed the title and foreword - does that affect anything? I have friends I watch that've done more & I've never had any notification! How is that fair? How come YOU'RE so special!?

If you read this a while back, perhaps it's worth a redo for my having comrades that're willing to offer brilliant suggestions - out of what I've dared to show, this remains the work I'm most proud of. If it's causing you grief, I'm so sorry! I don't know how to write!

Please, accept whatever apologies required - I'M A BAD PERSON.

:pinkiehappy: - ... in a good way, AMIRIGHT?


Oh, it's not causing me grief at all, I was just curious. In fact, now that I know it has been edited, I'm gonna give it another read :pinkiehappy:


Well that's awesome, because for KitsuneRisu it's vastly improved.


The weirdest thing is i'll get messages from writers who've changed their stories' titles, and i'll have no idea what I read in the past - then I check, reread, and voila!

Yet i've been told by several readers that my stuff continually jumps in their lists - WHY!? Am I that special? NO.

Such a weird world.

Nicely done! Poor Rainbow Dash. She needs to open up to her friends more often.


I appreciate your candid opinion, and... I'm very sorry we had to meet for negative circumstances.

Thanks for being openly honest. I really am grateful for it.

Oh, speaking of honest, I noticed this more in your first fic, but also once or twice in this one: Just because spellcheck says it's okay doesn't necessarily mean it is. In your first fic, you used "he" once to refer to Twilight. I'll leave it to you to find out where :trollestia:


I saw where you'd noticed the "he" in A Bad Decision - I was clumsily referring to Spike in regards to Applejack's arrival amidst the second or third paragraph - but I'm lost in this fic. Where did I use the wrong pronoun? PLEASE TELL ME!


Oh, it wasn't necessarily a pronoun in this one, just noticing the sort of things that spellcheck can't. I honestly forgot what it was now, sorry :applejackunsure: in any case, it wasn't a big deal, and would probably be overlooked entirely by most people.


Hm. I've reread it three times now to no avail - I am my own editor, sadly. I simply can't find the mistake. At least we tried, hm?

Pfft! That was funneh!!:rainbowlaugh: You always give me a good laugh, chuckle, giggle, or otherwise any way of expressing happiness and/or amusement. Nice job!:raritywink:

This story, I am completely floored, this is one of the most remarkable things I have read in a long while:ajsmug:

Comment posted by Nasty Mister Monket deleted Feb 6th, 2014

I like this story. It truly deserves its dark tag.

Wow her friends are asses for not realising how hard she works :twilightangry2:

What? I didn't comment on this the first time I read it? Bad horse.
I didn't read it as "mental illness". Is that why it has the dark tag? I could read it as "there's a fine line between passion and mental illness". But mostly I felt the passion.
Also, we both got a story in the same review post! That means our destinies are tied. I am afraid. Please be gentle. :fluttershyouch:


Thank you so much! You made me cry - usually that's reserved for bad things, but in this case it was wonderful. I truly appreciate it.


... you have two accounts?


1897261 I don't use "Shagbark" anymore, but that was what I used at first.
I'm thinking about the "dark" tag on this story. Maybe it says something about me that I didn't read it as dark the first time.

This is the definition of forced ideals. You have in this sense provided an explanation--and not without just reward. Excellent.

I can't think of the words to appropriately describe this, so instead I'll just say I liked it, and leave it at that.

1894133 I think it's past the point of passion and more along the lines of an obsession or a compulsion. That and the premise that she might be wrecking her body by crashing into stuff and pushing past her physical limits so much might justify the Dark tag.

On another note, I'm glad this got featured by Seattle's Angels. I think I first saw this story on the front page a month ago when I was procrast- taking a break from studying for a final I had that morning, and I wound up liking it.


You nailed it - this was totally a dark tag idea wrapped in an "Oh, Rainbow Dash is so lazy!" ideal. Goodness knows I struggled with how it should have been presented, but I'm glad the dark tag is getting some recognition. Very astute - good work.

This story was actually published mid-September and during the update had its title accented, sending it somehow to the top of my story pile. Do I mind? Heck no! I love this wordy little jaunt! Makes me happy every time I see it! Juicy enough to be interesting, yet small enough in portion to be quickly satisfying.

Sounds a bit like Regidar.

Whom I LOVE.

1903138 Believe it or not, this story's release date actually had me confused for a while. It took me about three days to notice that some of the older comments were about 15-20 weeks old. That might not sound relevant at first, but when I realized that this story had been here for a few months (as opposed to a few days) and was still sitting at a few hundred views...

Long story short, I'm the one who recommended this to Seattle's Angels. You can actually see that on their fic recommendation thread (comment ninety-something). Whether or not what I posted on that comment does this story any justice is debatable, but in the end, your story got some time in the spotlight and I have a 16-bit version of your story's cover image, so I think everyone's a bit happy with the end result.


Wow. I... really don't know what to say, Phazon. Thank you seems sort of anemic considering, but... well! THANK YOU from the BOTTOM OF MY HEART for liking this story enough to recommend it, but mostly for liking it - I am touched, and though the scope of our language allows us a myriad of ways to communicate, sometimes the simplest and obvious gestures suffice:



1905927 Aw, hey, don't mention it. :twilightsmile: I just really liked this story and thought it had gotten less attention than it deserved. I haven't actually read any of your other stories yet, but I think that's something I'll get around to sooner or later. Feel no need to look at mine, though. One of them is just an OC story, another one's a sequel to that OC story, another one is a ponified version of a 3DS game that was released about a year ago, and the fourth one is something that I may or may not end up cancelling (depends on what I decide to do with it when I finally look back at it again).

Author Interviewer

Having looked back over the Angels' review of this story, I'm going to have to disagree with them. There's nothing mind-blowing about it; it all makes perfect sense and thus makes me question why it needed to be written. Certainly, the purpleness of the prose, not to mention the nouning of a couple verbs (require, deny), don't seem to serve any purpose. If the caveat had been "Rainbow Dash is extremely smart and just has a hard time expressing herself," there might have been something more to this. The only thing that caught me was the line about her being afraid of her true loyalties. That was insightful; the rest bordered on incomprehensible.


Fangirling moment - bear with me: OMFG LunaUsesCaps read my stuff! WOO!

... very embarrassing, yet necessary and satisfying.

As far as this little introspection goes, I'm sort of poisoned by presentperfect's somewhat scathing opinion - he's certainly not wrong. However, for a bit of instant gratification it exists and I'm proud of it and I've had more positive than negative feedback, so... mm. I am apparently fixating. Silly of me! I mean, this had to be recommended to even qualify for Seattle's Angels, um... yeah.

I'm still totally fangirling. Thanks LUC!



I mean, this had to be recommended to even qualify for Seattle's Angels,

Not necessarily, except in the respect that they might not have found your story if it was never recommended. In fact, out of the 27 stories they've featured so far, I think only six of them were taken from their recommendation thread, and they've had dozens on fics recommended to them. In a small way, I'm almost as fortunate that they agreed with my recommendation as you are for getting featured.


Nevertheless, I am strictly attuned to it all being due your malfeasance - YOU WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL PERSON!

C'mon, seriously... it's an 1,800 word essay on what could be considered obvious. Whether my first serious stab at an actual story or no, the fact that it's getting a second glance makes me SO HAPPY.

Let's hope I can at least live up to it all. NO PRESSURE.

:raritycry: - WAH!

It's okay. The prose falls flat with some grammatical errors, though, and it just makes me feel like someone's just trying to sound smart.


Very valid, the part about someone trying to sound "smart".

I was vainly attempting to create the feeling that Dash herself was quite eloquent and thougtful, akin to perhaps some manner of unanticipated genius.

Sadly, I possess NONE of those qualities myself. It's not Dash's fault; I let her down with poor grammar and abundant abuse of the language throughout.

At least you gave it a read and had the decency to comment. I really appreciate that.

:pinkiehappy: - Thank you! WOO!

:rainbowhuh: - What the heck is grammar!?

:facehoof: - ... I have no idea, apparently. However, if you need any verbs nouning or whatever, apparently I'm your mare.

:pinkiesmile: - You're silly, Twi.

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