• Member Since 28th Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen August 2nd


I am a Scotsman who writes stories, not all of which are of the self-insert variety; I also have a Let's Play channel. :twilightsmile:



When Rarity meets a human who speaks with an accent she's never heard before, she tries hard not to let it interfere with her professional demeanour. But that professionalism is thrown out the window when he makes what he thinks is an innocent joke...

AUTHOR'S NOTES: This was just a little idea I had. We've all seen how Rarity can be in an argument. But how will she fare against a human who speaks with a heavy Scots accent? Comments contain spoilers.

Chapters (1)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 36 )

Quite humorous. Have an upvote, a comment and a mustache. :moustache:

What a twist! The dude is actually a fashion critic. I love the irony. Somehow, I picture him looking like Wreck-It Ralph.

It gae whit it said it woods, an' fur 'at Ah cannae faut it. it's written weel, an' Ah dae hiner 'at thaur will be a continuation ay thes. up voted an' favorited.


Thank ye. Ye're awfy kind.

I... freaking... love Scottish accents.

I do Wildlife rescue, and this one call out was to this bloke who had quite a heavy Scottish accent. The bird he called me up about had apparently been able to fly, and took off just before I got there.

So he's describing the bird, and how one of its legs was busted, and then he tells me this, quoted, with a completely straight face -
"Yeah, it was this brilliant white, with a brown streak down the back of it's head. Like the colour of runny baby shit."

Took everything I had not to burst out laughing.

Haha! Do a sequel chapter of her reaction! :rainbowlaugh:

Feck'n oat', I'm more int' Irish accents but Jesus... Rarity's gonna shit herself when she see's that mag. Oh, and I'm actually Aussie, for the record.

I think I have the Demoman from Team Fortress 2 permanently linked to a Scottish accent... because that's what I imagined Jock looked like.


That was brilliant! SEQUEL, DO IT! And SCHNAUZER! :moustache:

You just earned yourself a favourite.

This was the funniest thing I've ever read :rainbowlaugh:
Oh and Fuck you Rarity. I'm half Scottish (don't think that counts though. Does it?)

I ... I could follow it perfectly fine. Maybe you should have gone all-out Scots.

I understood enough to know what happened. Poor Rarity.

I'm not scottish, but I understood it. I blame the fact that I have to push my way through impenetrable accents all day every day.

Oh, lad, I Cannah breathe! Ta' good. :rainbowlaugh:

lol I'm Glaswegian, such a difference in accents between here and up north
Loved the story :twilightsmile:.

Scottish people always have the best accents.:twilightsmile:

So....Is that a well known magazine that Jock writes for?

But the conversation between Rarity and Jock reminds me of me and Mother's students (who think that you're spoiled if your life isn't a complete train wreck)

This a great, didn't have any issues with everything going on. Looking forward to whatever else you'll put out, cheers! :twilightsmile:

Before I read this: I will laugh if this Scotsman is the Demoman.

Dern! Was still funny as hell though!

Haaa. Understood every word. Good show, sir!

Bah, that was clear as a bell.
How one can't understand him I can't imagine.
Also, utterly brilliant and supremely hilarious.

I understood this clear as purified crystal.

Aw mate, I'm well chuffed. Ye've gie pleased a wee Scotsman wi' yer radge banter. Pure quality mate, top-notch shite here, keep up the bangin' patter bud, awrabest man.


Scottish people always sound fun with their awesome accent! :pinkiehappy:

This is absolutely brilliant

LET ME LOVE YOU, AUTHOR!!! :pinkiehappy:

Oh who DOESN'T love a good Scottish accent. Makes me wonder if people outside the US have such fascinations with our various accents. I could understand the love of a Southern/Country accent. Maybe some of the city ones but those are the only ones I could think of. Now I have to got hear about the difference in Northern and Southern Scottish accents.

And dammit, I'm thinking in a Scottish accent after just reading it... :facehoof:

Jack Wallace comes across to the reader as the embodiment of the negative stereotype of a Scottish male - a boorish individual with no respect for a female that will not put up with how he acts and that will stand up for herself in the face of his chauvanistic behavior. He puts me very much in mind of many of the reporters in the news media - a bully that cares nothing for those whom he ruins or hurts with what he publishes so long as it sells his fashion magazine. His crude humor I find to be unacceptable in his line of work and unacceptable when addressing a mare or woman. He should never have made such a joke. Had he been a truly decent person, he would have apologized for his unacceptable behavior once Rarity objected. Instead, Jack sees nothing wrong with his behavior and blames Rarity for not going with his crude (one might say chauvanistic) humor. As an act of revenge, he misused his position as editor of "Fashion Scotland" to ruin her. Being true to his character he makes no apology for his behavior in "The Scotsman And The Fashionista" when Rarity comes to him in the sequel "The Scotsman And The Fashionista 2" to print a retraction. Instead he further twists the knife in the next issue of his magazine, unwisely opening himself and his magazine to both legal action from Rarity and a backlash from his readers.

Congratulations on making a thoroughly dislikable character in Jack Wallace. Getting such a powerful negative reaction from myself shows the good writing that I enjoy with your other stories. I especially enjoy the stories involving Geo, John and Ace. Thank you for sharing your talent with us!



Aye, the wee las gets 'er temper up o'er nuthin' eh. Who agrees?

I understood all that plenty, I'm Scottish and I have many friends who have a thick accent and dialect of Scottish origin so it's easy to understand it.

I just don't speak it often myself unless I am really angry at someone.

Before I read this I thought she was gonna meet the Scotsman from Samurai Jack!


I've never watched Samurai Jack. :twilightsmile:

I’ve watched it and I thought the same thing!

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!