• Member Since 9th Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen Dec 29th, 2022

Visiden Visidane


Is that a terrorist?!?

T

We went in expecting vicious graverobbers, desperate bandits, even crazed grievers who had trapped themselves down there.

If only we were so lucky.



(For Halloween. Part of the Upheaval world)

Chapters (11)
Comments ( 18 )

What is the Upheaval setting? I've tried googling it, but couldn't find anything.

7637045
Its Visden's world where he sets several of his stories. Link to the first part of the main story.

7637045
Check Visiden's profile. All will be made clear.

I very much enjoyed this lost journal styled entry of the series.
It kept a suspenseful tone the whole way through, with a well paced descent into madness.
Plus more world building is always a treat. I love how ominous the ocean is in this universe XD

Overall good stuff.

7643455

Oceans are evil. No wonder Billy had to kill them.

he's snapping alert at everh flickering shadow.

Typo there on "every".

Heh, day 5 right here reminds me so much of a Darkest Dungeon level that is going poorly. You got the stress eater, running low on light sources and one person in the party is talking about stuff that's only stressing everybody else out.

Wierd fishy smell too. Could just be Deep Gem though.

Weird
Great line though. :rainbowlaugh:

One question:

If they are underground; how are the diary entries listed as days?

Wouldn't Entry,1Entry 2 etc be more logical?

There was no way, these were kill by ponies.

There is no way these were killed by ponies.

Made me sick at heart when the Captain told us to get him to shut up.

I get the feeling this was meant to imply killing, but I'm not sure. It would be quite easy to silence a horse with a muzzle without hurting them... if everyone else is thinking rationally.

I'm keeping a knife close.It might be him or us soon.

Should be a space after the full stop.

Comment posted by Beware The Carpenter deleted Nov 8th, 2016

If Ash Frost died in a one mare raid on the Imperial Capital, did they ever get her body back or did they just build a memorial?

This is almost like a shorter version of Pen Stroke's Into the Depths only with no Alicorns involved. I liked it. :twilightsmile:

Any place connected to the Old Kingdom should be scoured for any lingering monsters or traps (and if possible remove/destroy them) before they consider doing anything with them. Much less turning one into a burial site for respected legionnaires.

Comment posted by Follower of Chaos deleted Feb 20th, 2018

I have reviewed this here.

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