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Damaged


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Comments ( 112 )

What kinda transformation?

Pretty interesting start. And Elizabeth didn't decide to just screw earth over even though she was leaving, considering the concrete sealed door. The demoness' attitude is amusing too. First summon in who knows how long? It's worth being a bit lax and generous with them.

7299558 She has a cutie mark and a pony tail, I think we can assume pony? :rainbowwild:

7299577 A thousand years, the demon can wait a few hundred more to claw her way out of there. And hopefully by then there will be weapons undreamed of that will vaporize her quickly... maybe...

7299596 ok and what of TG and mental change are for?

Hmm, looks like she got a lust demon there. Robably the least potentiall evil of the types you can get. Never did like the whole black and white description of them all.

Interesting so far. Looking forward to seeing where this is going. Upvoted on put on my tracking shelf. :twilightsmile:

7299601 TG is, well, you can assume there is only one character changing right now, I think it is obvious who will change gender. Mental changes are, because, there was something significant about the jolt she got that will be revealed slowly.

7299603 I am sure she greatly appreciates your words, but would appreciate a pick-axe more. :rainbowlaugh:

7299655 Thank you! :heart:

Yyyyeah, I think I like ocalhoun's interpretation of that particular concept better.

7300030 Which concept? Demon summoning?

7300033
Equestria in a human. The story even has the same name.

7300044 Wait, what? That story was of the world of Equestria inside someone? How the horse-apples is that anything like this?

I mean, the names are the same, mine is a metaphorical one, not literal. The plot, I think you will find, is VERY different. Maybe you should read this?

Wonder what bunker it is, maybe the one Hitler died in, she could bring him back and they could get it on before taking over the world together?:rainbowlaugh:

7300097

How the horse-apples is that anything like this?

It isn't. That's why I liked it better. I didn't really click this expecting to see commissioned fetish porn. Oh well, my own fault for only reading the title, I guess.

7300105 Well, sorry about that. I did make sure it was all in the description but I can see where you could think it was about the same thing.

7300100 If we are talking about his stronghold in Berlin, I would say not. That thing was taken apart quite well and, I believe, is well gone.

7300120 But didn't he & Ava suicide in another bunker which I believe still exists buried under a car park in Berlin somewhere still? He could sure give the demoness some ideas. Assuming that's the bunker, unlikely as it is of course. (Sorry if my day is consisting of random thoughts)

Well, it's off to an interesting start.

It's not tagged as 'dark' so I will assume that, while she may pay a hefty price for the way she came to Equestria, it won't be anything too harsh. Dealing with demons isn't exactly an evil act, but it's definitely not a good one, either. She did at least try to prevent the demoness from escaping and hopefully there are secondary and tertiary layers of wards that the demon hasn't discovered yet that will keep her contained until her power runs out and she has to return to wherever it was that she came from.

Looking forward to seeing where this is going!

She could be greased lightning? :rainbowwild:
Here's to hoping she didn't leave the book inside her prison with the demon...
Keep going! ;)

now that is settled - now that that is settled
for such informal eating them - for such informal eating them
cry out and try to - crying out and trying to
latched on to her horn - latched onto her horn
enough and flushed hot - enough and she flushed hot
dilemma firmer against - dilemma more firmly against
held her firm, just as firm - held her firmly, just as firmly
as she held Twilight's - as she was holding Twilight's 
Twilight then, she began - Twilight then, and she began
grip, she drove - grip. She drove
need to fess up - needs to fess up

*****
Interesting developments...

For the record, dandelion blossoms, stems, leaves, and roots are all edible and, so I hear, quite tasty. :twilightsmile:

7363954 All fixed... except for the first one. It was used in quotes and I stand by it.

And yes, I swapped the focus tag from RD to Twi. RD was intended to be the target but that has shifted, as per the commissioner's request.

Good going Twilight, let's just pump magic into the unknown-state human in the middle of a unknown transformation! We blame horny-- I mean hormones.
Keep going! ;)

That would be wings I guess? Go with the flow girl, you may as well get used to nakedness, pony time soon.:pinkiehappy: As she transforms the clothes won't fit and probably will all tear up anyway.

7443444 Ah, this usually goes one of three ways:
1. they take it unexpectedly well
2. they freak out and attract more attention than necessary
3. they try something ridiculous to wake themselves up and then just try to adapt as best they can.

Alright! Joining club Pegasus, huh?
Enjoy the tits while you can, Spike, they won't be with you for much longer!
Keep going! ;)

7445555 Clearly, wings are best anyway. I mean, anypony can move things around like a unicorn, but how many unicorns can actually fly? (not a lot!)

7445680 yeah, flying is pretty great. My ponysona is a Pegasus in fact...

7445691 Alas, in my HiE self-insert fic, I had to go with unicorn. Personally, heights bother me, and a pegasus afraid of flying would have been a pretty sad pegasus. :pinkiesad2:

7445694 agreed. I got over it with the realization that, so long as you don't fall all the way, there's really no difference between being ten feet in the air and a hundred feet up. You just need to get skilled in not touching the ground at speed! :rainbowdetermined2:

A tail?

"A

Rainbow Dash leaned over Elizabeth, so when the woman opened her eyes she was staring up into a face that was at least one-fifth cooler than any she had seen before.

img4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130405221911/mlp/images/e/e1/FANMADE_Luna_I_see_what_you_did_there.jpg

"That as may be Spike, we need to take care of her even more in that case."

"That's

She liked rubbing herself against thing.

things.?

She had gotten a full three inches with the bones of those creatures.

Poor sheep. :fluttercry:

7445694
7445704 I suspect my acrophobia is actually an aspect of agoraphobia, since I'm pretty sure it's the distances involved that make me uncomfortable, not just the thought of falling. I much prefer to keep my feet on the ground and a wall (and hopefully ceiling) nearby. Anyway, I'm definitely a unicorn at heart, personally.

Oh buck her indeed! *nudge nudge, wink wink*

Gohan: still five

Well it's got possibilities. I don't see what the demon is so consoled about yet, though. I mean, mortals are normally never free of their the world they're dumped in. That's sort of why she was summoned in the first place. It's kind of adorable how Twilight is caught completely off guard by the feelings her new anatomy is giving her.

7533724 Ponies have pets, some of the pets are exclusively carnivorous. Fishing seems like the nicest way to keep them fed.

So Elizabeth any ideas on a pony name yet or haven't thought about it yet? :rainbowhuh:

Spike, do you think you can handle working along side this strange mare and does occasionally catching her in her human nudeness bother you? :moustache:

Scootaloo, if Twi can grow your wings bigger, would you go for it? :twilightsmile:

Names...names...ooh how bout Tempest Wrangler? :pinkiehappy:

7533789 AAAH, Still no chapter name on comments, this was a reference to Twi's 'Go fish' remark end of ch:3. Sorry, until Fimfiction fix this I'm going to start my comments with chapter names from now.:facehoof: Stallions might be fishing for sumtin' other than fish!:twilightsmile:

ch:4
Hey Damaged, was just trying to put Liz's name into a pony name generator (cause I'm bored OK?) and just realised nowhere in the story does she introduce herself full or first name to anypony or did I miss it? :rainbowhuh:

I'm actually wondering if Liz cutie mark could mean something sexual, considering she felt said mark, while also feeling something between her legs as she rubbed them together. Kind of a pity the chapter already ended! I hope to see more of it soon! :yay:

This fic is quickly becoming my guilty pleasure! I'm really enjoying seeing the drama unfold.

Oh Rarity, make sure you preserve your notes they may become useful later...
Keep going! ;)

Twilight had teleported, as was her want, when things got too crazy for her.

wont,

Rarity's gonna have an uphill battle on her hooves trying to make dresses faster than Liz is changing.

"Please stay here!" It wasn't Twilight's brain doing the talking. She was maddeningly hard again, her embarrassment saved only thanks to the spell. "I mean, I know what you can do, too! Spike was fine at cleaning my tree-house, but this thing," she gestured to the castle around them, "is just too big for one little dragon. So please, if you want that is, work here as my maid."

You know, I have the feeling Twilight only wants to see her in a maid outfit! :rainbowwild:

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