• Member Since 18th Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen March 24th

Inquisitor M


Why 'Inquisitor'? Because 'Forty two': the most important lesson I ever learned. Any answer is worthless until you have the right question. Author, editor, critic, but foremost, a philosopher.

E
Source

Cadance, Discord, and Fluttershy walk into a blizzard, but it's no laughing matter: there's something out there, buried beneath centuries of ice. But it's going to take teamwork to find it, and it's neither the Princess of Love nor the Lord of Chaos that are holding all the cards.

What's more, somepony predicted everything that is about to happen, and it turns out that history has an unexpected cadence.

Audio reading by S. Ninja.

Base background image by Kitana-Coldfire.
Primary edit by Pascoite.
Additional editing and assistance from: Abcron, RainbowBob, wYvern, PresentPerfect, Nightwalker, Prak.
Inspired by To Make a Spark, by Chris.
Originally written for the May Write-Off prompt 'Beneath the Mask'.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 33 )

5060002 I was very worried about using something over the top that would be distracting. I started with a little tri-colour set of notes as a png, but it drew far too much attention. I tried using three generic notes, then three reduced-size notes (Alt+14, by the way). Eventually I threw away the reference to three and went with the single, which I thought looked about perfect.

Whoo, finally here! Glad that it came out so awesome! :heart:

Well, that's a very odd trio. I like it, though. I like it a lot.

A good story indeed, and wonderful to see the final product.

But I alo have an entire kingdom

Still not without need of cleanup, though :raritywink:
That, and the final section's paragraphs could use some shoring up and alignment. But that was all.

5061005 God dammit! I should naver have trusted GDocs. The last scene all looked tabbed properly when I important it (unlike the rest). I guess I was overly hopeful that it was playing fair by the time I'd formatted the rest and more than a little googly-eyed when it came to giving it a visual sweep.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

Ah, it comes home at last. :)

This was amazing. Truly.

The bit about Luna being cryptic got me to thinking: is show Luna actually more cryptic than show Celestia? It seems like most of the convoluted and obfuscated stuff from the princesses comes from Celestia, and in, for example, "Luna Eclipsed" and "For Whom the Sweetie Belle Tolls," she was positively forthright.

Anyway, I wasn't sure if the "an" here was intentional or not:

Finally, she saw an herself, Fluttershy, and Discord walking in the snow,

I know humans can sing multiple notes at once, but I ain't know nothing about no horse throat.

“Come on, Fluttershy,” said Cadance, gesturing towards her own bed. “You had it easy on the way here; it’s your turn to keep me warm.”

Oh, Cadence :heart: What ever would Shining Armour say? Apart from 'why couldn't you wait until I was there as well?'

Finally got around to reading this story, and i have to say... I don't get it. I'm sorry, but large portions of it were just confusing to me.

Of course, that's not a bad thing. On the contrary, that's good. It means that the story is far more intelligent than I am.

Not that that's much of an achievement. I'm terribly stupid.

That was a very awesome story, so bravo there. Discord's dialog was excellently crafted, and Fluttershy and Cadance both came through strongly as well.

A couple of nits to pick... Discord's constant back and forth between prankster and sincerity started to wear on me a bit by the end. I get that his canon character is pretty much like that, but... it definitely felt repetitive to have each of his scenes start with his over the top nonchalance before one of the other ponies said something to drag him back into honesty/sincerity mode each time.

Frostbite, and her internal monologue were great. The conflict in her head over what to do, and the alternation between optimism and realism felt very real and very alive. The overall weaving in of that plot with the present-day trio flowed pretty well too, bringing things to a head only a few moments after I "solved it" myself. Most stories tend to drag it out way longer, so I appreciate the well-timed denouement here.

All in all, I really loved the story, and it's great mix of heartwarming character building, along with adventure/tragedy. Thanks for sharing! :yay:

Wow, that was great. I think I have a new favorite story by you, Scott.

5079575 It's the Discord, isn't it?

5079587 Partly him, partly Cadance. Probably more the latter, to be honest, her portrayal really worked for me.

5079623 Yeah. Making Cadance interesting one was of the purposes of choosing her. It was actually Luna when I first constructed the story, but she'd getting a bit old hat – even for me.

What he said. Still... Have you ever considered submitting this story to Equestria Daily? You can find out how to do so here.

5084410 Thank you, but it got submitted to Equestria Daily and The Royal Guard before it even appeared here :)

This one should be my 6th on EqD and 5th at TRG, I think. Since an EqD pre-reader and a TRG pre-reader were among my editing crew, it shouldn't be a reach to think it'll make both with a minimum of fuss.

You can never tell, though, and I appreciate the prod about it.

A nice tale. Possibly the first I've ever read from you. I don't think it's quite Skywriter levels of Cadance writing, but don't feel bad, unlike him, you're only human.

I felt like the present day tale was more Cadance and Discord's than fluttershy's, but recognize how the story wouldn't work withou her there as a second foil to Discord.

Nice work.

Oh such a cute and fuzzy story

I just head! Equestria Daily! Congratulations!

He flicked both forks simultaneously, producing a single, perfect chord...

Quite a feat, there. Was he using distortion? :derpytongue2:

Once again, excellent work!

This is a masterpiece. Thank you for writing it :twilightsmile:

5875617 Thank you, though I don't pretend it isn't without several flaws. As long as people can enjoy the characters' antics, though, I'm happy.

5875780
Regardless, they didn't detract from my reading experience. I stand by my masterpiece assertion.
Although that makes me ask: what in your story collection would you point me to next?

Read for the Goodfic Bin! Because I thought this was really, really cool, I'm accepting it into the bin.

Here is ribbon! Here is decision!

i.imgur.com/GizVyc0.png

Have a good day!

Have a long-overdue review from the Pleasant Commentary and Review Group!

Apologies for getting this out so late. Feel free to PM me if you have any questions, comments, or concerns. :twilightsmile:

That was gorgeous. All I have to say is that I have tears in my eyes. Thank you for writing this.

7943892 Thanks Kitcat! Writing Discord was a ton of fun, as was showing a slight spin on Fluttershy's relationship with him.

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