It's the year 2559. The UNSC barely managed to fight off the hordes of the Covenant. That victory came at a hefty price. With the war over and the rebuilding process beginning, the UNSC Tuscany is sent out to investigate potential new worlds to colonize. It's crew and captain are in for a surprise when a gravitational anomaly turns into a tense situation where cooler heads must prevail.
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Chapters (32)
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I'm not gonna lie here, I'm more than impressed
.
Now correct me if I'm wrong (in which I have a high likelihood), you used an actual ship from a book!? And got the class right!? You sir have earned 5/5 mustaches and a fav for accuracy and skill. Keep it up
i like it already
Sweet! A Halo and MLP fix? AWESOME!!!
Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice, Like, fav and 'stach for you
At first I thought this might be another fic were the UNSC ship(s) crashes somewhere on Equestria, it might as well be but I never heard one where it splattered Rainbow Dash mid-flight. This might be different than the rest, I hope.
2535900
I'm sorry to tell you this but I don't remember a UNSC Tuscany in any of the books nor in any canon Halo media. I could be wrong though but I usually remember UNSC ships whenever I can and I don't remember a Tuscany anywhere in my head right now.
this looks likes its going to be good
2536313
UNSC Tuscany is of my own design. The Prowler class is, however, a part of the Halo universe.
2536631
Sweet, I do really like the Prowlers. I'm not sure if it's because ONI tend to use those kind of ships a lot or its freaking ability to cloak.
Or maybe I just simply like spy ships.
Oh and since the Prowlers can only carry less than a hundred crew members, I'm wondering how they could hold up with such small numbers against what ever they have to fight. Then again, the UNSC is way far ahead in tech compared to the Equestrians. Quality against quantity perhaps?
The ship I used in my Halo crossover is the UNSC Pony Express and it's actually a canon ship in Halo: Ghosts of Onyx. I can't believe no one used it on any Halo crossover with MLP but then again, it would be funny if there's a ship call UNSC Friendship Is Magic splattered across the hull.
2536728
Prowlers have been used widely for reconnaissance and exploration missions due to their small crews and ability to cloak. A perfect ship for this story. The one from Halo Legends influenced the Tuscany's design.
2536313That's cool. I was wrong, but what the heck. I myself am more of a Battletech breed, having played Mechwarrior 2 when I was only six, then discovering the books when I was 12. Now I own almost all of them, and my collection is still growing. I know almost all the 'mechs, vehicles, battle armor, clans and sphere houses by heart
2536759
Ah, good ol' The Package. When you said Prowler the first thing pop in my mind was the UNSC Red Horse from The Mona Lisa but I think they're pretty much the same except that Red Horse doesn't have cloak as I recalled, well that or they didn't used it.
2536794
Yeah I know how you feel, I've been a semi-hardcore Halo fan since Halo: Combat Evolved came out. I nearly got all the games, books and whatnot.
Well, this is an impressive beginning. Poor Dashie, she's been hit by incoming ships several times now (from what I've read). You'd think she would put on some navigation lights or at least a crash helmet by now. Heh, at least they didn't plow through Cloudsdale like that guy in the glider.
I can safely guess that a few typical questions will be answered in the next chapter:
What's the protocols on "First Contact"? Despite the planet having stuff right out of a fairytale book...
Do we speak the same Common language as Equestrians?
Any communicable diseases? I assume they have quarantine protocols when putting an alien inside the ship's Med bay?
How badly fubar'ed are the engines and will they be able to leave? I do hope they're working on the communication systems or, at the least, a way to send up a rescue beacon.
Is the magic of Equestria harmful to humans or their stuff? Can it be measured? Is it just some weird form of benign radiation? Will the stealth tech on the ship work at all versus magic? Is the optical stealth working? (The huge trail of gouged earth from the crash landing might be a giveaway to it's location, but then some ponies aren't the sharpest tool in the shed)
Questions for later:
When is Pinkie Pie gonna try to throw them a party and have rifles pointed at her (and nearly shot) for setting off the party cannon? You have to do this, it's cannon. [doh!]
Will Twilight manage to make even an AI get annoyed with how many non-stop questions she's asking it about everything?
Rainbow Dash riding shotgun, head out the window, on a go-fast land vehicle? Wheeeeeeee!
How aware of the greater universe is Celestia and, more likely, Luna?
You had me at horse nebulae. Good beginning, can't wait for further chapters.
Fix the grammatical and punctuation errors and you're all set.
Also, PLEASE don't make them speak the same language. It takes so much out of the story!
Ermh. Dash hitting the ship would result in a very splattered dash. No offense, but the laws of physics were screwed at a level only acceptable for ogres.
2538145
Ship was only doing about thirty when the impact happened, plus the laws of physics are slightly skewed on Equestria. Magic and all that jazz.
I don't really like how casual this captain Daniel Ryan is. Still, tracked because Halo.
2538182 Ship is several hundred thousand pounds. When a flying mountain of metal hits a squishy little pegasus, pegasus is a pancake. Or more accurately, mulch.
So.... Why did Dash didn't got vaporized?
This is good. I will watch.
2539415
The impact was relatively slow and she had enough plot armor to avoid serious injury.
Hah, not sure how Dash would feel being called roadkill. I'd love to see her face!
yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes
Ha, I know that feeling. It's one of the greatest motivational push in the world!
Need more fuel, wait lemme reg 50 or so more times and will upwote it
I just love this story so far, I'm not a big HALO ( game ) fan but i played the first game, and the universe always been awesome, and MLP added, it's just 20% cooler
Though one thing i say as constructive notice, The captain let Dasy off, and now she is back with her friends, even though they know her name, they behave a bit as like saw her first time, obv don't know her fully yet, but earlier she could walk around in the mass hall while the crew enjoy breakfast which is in quite contrast with the end part of approach of her and her friend ( also considering she promised to bring books back to the Captain )
The only complaint I have is that the Captain's attitude toward Dash was much too lax.
To have an alien of undetermined faction be treated the way she was probably would never have happened.
Humanity just got out of the galaxy-threatening war with the Covenant.
I'm sure there would have been protocols of some kind for a situation like this.
It would have been better if they took her to a secured and guarded med-bay, where the guards would have prevented Dash throwing the tantrum like she did.
The SPARTAN (and technically, they are supposed to be all caps) should not have been so forthcoming with any info regarding humanity; the same goes for anyone else.
These are military people who have fought the only other known alien races because of some error in a religious text.
Dash should have been detained, questioned, and once it was made clear Equestria is not hostile, be released.
She should not have just been given directions on how to leave the ship on her own. Thats a massive compromise to the security of the ship.
And, this is just a personal thing here, I HATE when magic is considered the 'unexplainable, undetectable energy'.
The Forerunners could make artificial stars on the INSIDE of a hollow PLANET. I call shenanigans on that magic (at least in the Halo universe you have put it in) is something unique and unknown to the rest of the galaxy.
Sheesh, this came out longer and more brutal than I meant it to be. I still like the story though!
2542937
All of that is fairly accurate. I would respond with a few points.
None of the SPARTANS had really any direct interaction with Dash. The captain was really the only one to actually talk to her at any great detail.
Also, just because they cant figure out how 'magic' works right now doesn't mean they wont.
All I can say is that Captain Ryan's decisions will be explored and explained as the story progresses.
I'm glad you liked the story despite the handful of odd plot points.
2540089
Are you saying Rainbow Dash has a big butt?!?
Well, it's one fine flank but nowhere near the padding found on Celestia's royal rump.
2543039
Plot Armor
2542987
Thank you for responding in a civil manner.
On the note of magic in regards to it being in the Halo-verse......
PLEASE don't make it ACTUAL magic. PLEASE.
In the words of Clarke: "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic."
And considering the Forerunners, the tech could be so advanced the ponies don't even have to know they are using it.
Also, do you intend to write in 1st person or third person?
2543074
There's no point in yelling at the people who politely point out the weaknesses in ones work.
First person will be used for all the Personal Logs of the crew while third person will be used for the rest of the story.
2543096
Alright, good to know.
Also, since the timeline escapes me, is this pre or post-Halo 4?
2543111
It takes place two years after the Battle of Earth.
'that she had escaped any major injury, but would be very sore for a few days"
I find that strange. She was run over by a spaceship. She should have had irreparable damage to her body.
Super Anal Halo Lore Nitpick mode:
The Fall of Reach actually contains an off hand references by Halsey to "climate-controlled weather" (on page 22) for an entire colony, and there is also talk of "Atmospheric Processors" (This is technically an Aliens reference but is canon all the same), and we also know the UNSC has for instance Terraformed Mars so weather control actually is probably something they do routinely. So it should probably be more like "wait you control it by pushing around clouds with your feet?" rather then shock it's done at all. It would probably look rather different from what Equestria does (duh) and probably not nearly as precise, but the overall effect of a stable climate devoid of violent swings or damaging phenomenon maybe pretty much the same. Keep in mind that the UNSC is 500 years in the future after all. Though really I only bring this up cause I've been pecking away at my own crossover and the topic came up in passing.
Other then that this is pretty good so far. Although I think what exactly happened to the ship in the first chapter could have been a bit better explained as I honestly found it rather confusing. I also kinda have a feeling what you might have been hinting with the planet fall, but the planet magically seeming to have a variable gravity well really needed to be commented on more. It's impossible for a ship that can accelerate fast enough to reach other planets in a system in hours to pull away from it, and yet then when it hits the atmosphere the gravity magically shifts to being low enough to allow a controlled landing? I think some "gravity doesn't work that way" comments are in order, as might some speculation regarding if they could lift off again. (The Captain's confidence he can make orbit again seems a bit strange in light of having just been yanked down the planets surface for instance)
Still I'll be keeping on eye on this as I do most of these, so good luck with it.
2543309
Well that would depend on the actual relative velocity of the impact. Mass alone is irrelevant after all you don't explode into bloody gore when you trip and fall even though you've collided with the earth which weighs something like 6000 billion billion tons. Then we have to factor in that we've seen Dash repeatedly walk away from crashes that look like they ought to have had impact forces like a car wreck. How durable she is, or isn't, seems to vary solely based on the needs of a writer if she needs to break her wing for the plot she's suddenly very mortal. Then the next day she can flying kick her way through half a dozen oak trees without scuffing her hoof.
In light of that I can't really get much venom up for him having her shrug off bumping into a spaceship, it's not exactly unprecedented durability for her.
2543356
Ah, I had forgotten that part of the Fall of Reach. For the purposes of terraforming in this story, it is a large scale process to make an atmosphere more hospitable for human life.
Also, more information about the engines and gravitational anomaly will be released in future chapters.
I like this story so far,I cant wait until you are done with the next chapter!
2542937
The Forerunners could make artificial stars on the INSIDE of a hollow PLANET that is my fucking point! equestria may be a forerrunner world
2536810Bloody oath eh?
Personally I would have changed the ponies a bit, not making Twi so gamebreaking. I mean it's fun in the show, but when you mix it with a more serious work it just doesn't fit. I remember when some HiE made humans immune to magic but then everyone dropped that. It's always, the cute librarian and break the bones of the supersoldier, or Fluttershy can stare Master chief to death... Try not to run in the same cliches.
If planet was a forerunner shield world (with an invisible crust) it would make more sense for the sun and moon to move on their own. The librarian might manipulate thir progress too as an experiment.
I have to agree with the other guy. They are in a new unknown planet, fresh out of decaded of fighting agaisnt every alien they have meet. First thing they do is offer her a salad and let her go, knowing she can compromise them? Its just... how the hell did this guy become a captain? It's an idiotic decision, no matter how much of a good guy he might be.
So far this is looking really good. You got a thumb up and fav from me.
2547633
I will make a point to better explain Cpatain Ryan's position. I intended him to be and ODST working directly for ONI.
That's exactly what should be happening. Stuff moves at constant velocity without applied acceleration. If you want to stop a spaceship, you have to accelerate in the opposite direction.
2552346
Very true. It's worded incorrectly. I'll add that to the list of revisions.
Revised that section. Thanks for catching it.
This is amazing. Keep at it you glorious bastard, you!
*Salutes*
2553417
Well since you asked nicely... okay.
I think it was much more than that. I think it was more than 20 billion, and that's before the battle of Earth, in which it's population was reduced from billions to 200 million.
Though... it seems he broke too easily?
Its going good so far.
I was just off-put a bit when he cried.
But I think that was because I'm so used to reading stories that, should they include military characters, said characters had much different ways of going about their past.
I think the impact was made doubly so since this is a UNSC Frigate captain.
A captain who could be set off to tears at the mere mentioning of the war, as horrible as it was, wouldn't be fit for command.
I dunno, maybe I'm thinking like this because all the other popular Halo stories (MIA, On the Wings of Angels) feature
military characters who were pulled out of the fighting, or are still fighting.
I guess if some of those same characters had the amount of time to dwell on the past like everyone in this story, their attitudes would be different.
But regardless, I eagerly await for MOAR.
2553445
I intended for him to be an emotionally broken person, not some badass who never shows sadness. Just because you are in the military doesn't mean you are immune to emotional pain. And it wasn't so much mentioning the war that set him off, but that it led back to his family.
"Okay, weekly friendship progress reports."
What you did there. It's there, and I see it.