• Member Since 26th Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen Jul 31st, 2019

Enter Madness


I'm just a guy. Who likes ponies. And fan fiction. Why not both?

Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 133 )

If this doesn't get featured, I will cut multiple bitches. This is one of the most beautiful stories I have ever read, and I sure as hell ain't lying to you, my friend. It took me almost half an hour to read it, but it was worth it. Fantastic job. I just... there are no words.

If I might make a suggestion. But, really strive on the descriptiveness of the story. Like we get that the first scene with Octavia and Vinyl together is a memory, and memories can become unclear and shift over time. The focus is on her and her relationship to Vinyl. For her nervousness, was she jittery, with a quick tapping sound as the hoof contacted the floor? Or perhaps the bow jumped and quivered? Or teeth chattering, or if she's well disciplined, so as to maintain the professional aloofness, perhaps her heart beating rapidly, the thumping filling her ears? The vision pulsing as bursts of brightness and darkness washes over her vision from her hyper-awareness and strong, rapid heartbeat? What about lighting? Is it strong and steady, like the spotlights/ lights used in a concert hall, were there the rapid flashes of strobe lights, lasers, colored flecks of light emanating from disco balls, were there colored spotlights, and were there patterns and designs in the film over the spotlights, like at a rave or a mosh pit? What about the background noise of the audience cresting as the impatience grows, before Vinyl drops the bass? Paint us a picture with your words. Your story can only benefit from it, taxing though it may be.

I really like the nightmares that escalate in intensity as time progresses, and the effect it has upon Octavia, fraying her nerves, causing her to become quicker to lose her temper, her sleeping becomes restless, when she sleeps at all. Her revulsion to music, because it reminds her of her departed spouse, and awakens the intense ache and agony of missing her spouse and the memories resurrecting her grief afresh. I like how it gets so intense that she winds up hurting herself unintentionally and blanking out at times.

I especially like how it has a road of redemption/ healing to it. That even when Octavia has hit a really low point in her life, the ponies who care about her encourage her to play, as a means of expressing her grief, and to begin some measure of healing. That's not to say that Octavia won't miss or feel an ache when thinking of Vinyl, but enough that she can live again, play the music that they both loved. And we are shown the firstfruits of her road of redemption/ healing. She's beginning the healing process, she's beginning to reconnect with her family and friends, and she's beginning to play the music that Vinyl and her loved.

Dr. Freud though. Does your Equestria not have pharmaceutical industry/ medicines? Or does the doctor prefer a psychological holistic approach, than the proscription of antidepressants? Or would he see it as treating the symptoms but not the cause behind the symptoms? I like that Octavia is seeing him to help her work through this difficult time in her life.

Also, you're proabably wanting the word bear, than bare.
Of course, Octavia knew that she wasn’t fine. She told herself that she was, but she never really believed it. She was a musician who couldn’t even bare to look at an instrument most days, let alone her own.

Not gonna lie, I'm dealing with some liquid pride over here. This is at once heartbreaking and uplifting. There are some minor mechanical issues, but in the end, they don't matter -- this is truly beautiful.

Edit: Lolwut? I compliment the story and get downvoted? Geez. Protip: comment downvotes are for spam and trollish insults, not so you can just crap all over a story and/or those who like it.

I KNEW THIS WOULD GET FEATURED. :pinkiehappy: Congrats, you deserved it~

Heartbreaking, and excellently written. Good job.

Eldorado
Moderator

Congrats on your feature. Had a feeling it was headed there the minute you asked me to edit it.

Oh lookie here! Another one of these.

26 likes, 7 comments... and Featured. seems legit.

2511448
If you don't like it, don't read it.

For all that this is an early feature (not your fault that people are getting pissy over it), I really liked the story. It was a short, sad, but sweet one-shot.

2511514

If you don't like it, don't read it.

Do you understand how retarded this sounds? How can one dislike something without reading it?

Plus, this excuse would be warranted only if you were 7 years old.
... are you?

Take comfort in the fact that you'll clearly show me by downvoting my comment. Yeah. Because having an opinion. Who gives a fuck, right?
I upvoted yours.

2511555 porn and clop there you go

2511578 Who said I'm a fan of clop?
Y'know what? Don't answer that. I can already see I'm in the autistically assblasted pit of doom.Why the fuck am I even trying? I'm so stupid. :rainbowlaugh:

Read Later! :twilightsheepish:

2511352 Thanks for having confidence in me!

2511137 Thank you for taking time to point out these things. I like to think that Dr. Freud is more focused on making Octavia better permanently, rather than just pumping her full of pills and leaving it at that. So yes, she wants to treat the cause, not the symptoms, as you said. Also, you refer to the doctor as a "he," and I don't remember if I specified it in the story, but I always imagined her as a mare. Not sure why.

2511249>>2511385 Thank you for the kind words! I will certainly do my best to continue to entertain in the future.

2511514 Thanks for sticking up for me, dude (or dudette).

2511629 I would appreciate it if, when you took the time to comment on my story, you said something constructive about it. If you didn't like it, you could tell me why not or what I could improve, and if you are bashing it based solely on the premise, then... well, there's not really anything I can say other than that seems remarkably closed-minded and obtuse.

I could barely read this and type this comment. Everything is blurry and I`m getting double vision from all of this crying. I cried so much! More than a story has ever made me cry I think. This is beautiful! Bravo!

2512748 You have no idea how much this comment means to me. The fact that something I wrote could possibly make anyone cry is beyond incredible, and I offer my sincerest thanks for your kind words.

2512758 I`m happy that I made you happy. I just love sad stories. The emotion they invoke. The way that they take you away from your life and engross you. Sad stories are like a song, the flow of emotions, the way that they take your breathe away, all accompanied by the steady sound of your heart beat. Without sadness and pain, how can we feel?

Before I read I have one thing to say. By the time I finish I better be crying my ass off!!

2512817 Oh gosh... (I know! I'll just make them cry with this comment!)

Um... sick puppies! (yeah, that's sad, keep doing that)

Old people! (That's not sad, what am I doing?)

Animal abuse commercials with Sarah McLaughlin! (Alright, back on track.)

Sad clowns! (Hitting 'em right in the heartstrings.)

Uh... other sad things? Yeah, I'm out of sad things. Maybe the story will help.

Add to Read Later...
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_leoswyja5u1qangpe.gif


On a side note, who the hell is disliking all the comments?!

2511419 Man, I forgot to thank you when I was dishing it out! Thank you for editing my story and helping make it good enough to entertain all these fine, upstanding folks here on the FimFictions. Couldn't have done it without you.

Eldorado
Moderator

2513147 Hey, editing is my job, after all. You're most welcome. Although I'm sure you're giving me more credit than I deserve.

2513173 I think you undersell what you do for me. It's not just the editing, but the fact that, since I don't trust myself to objectively analyze what I've written, your compliments usually give me enough faith to put it out there, and that is worth more than I could say. So I'm going to thank you again, and you're gonna like it!

Whoa, sorry, getting a little sappy, and, uh... overzealous. So, y'know, thanks, or whatever *shrugs nonchalantly*

I don't even know what I'm saying anymore, so I'm going to stop before I hurt myself.

2513197

Heh, this reminds me of my current situation. Though he and I have barely started, lol. :moustache:

In other news, I've been given a good first impression, and the premise itself intrigues me (though I'm a bit scared how I'll react after getting into University Days). Will read soon.

Eldorado
Moderator

2513197 I love you too. :rainbowkiss:

I must ask, is this a sequal to somthing?:rainbowhuh:

2513393 what am i about to read that has gotten to this conversation that I got myself into randomly:rainbowderp:

2513659 This is not a sequel, just an idea I had. If you would like more information on where the idea came from, feel free to check out this blog post.

2512711 As stated, I did read it. Not reading it and disliking it is stupid.

But I'm too much of a lazy fucktard to say something. :twilightsmile:

2513709 It's alright if you didn't like it, I just don't appreciate the blatant insults and profanity when no one made a personal attack on you. To each their own, but... come on.

2513746 I didn't insult the story nor it's author (you). I did, however, insult the one who tried to censor me.
T'was something minimal, though. Nothing like ordering him to fornicate with self. :twilightsheepish:

2513993 Do you even funny and original?

Beautifully done. Bravo!

Eldorado
Moderator

2513753

I didn't insult the story nor it's author

That's funny. Your first comment:

Oh lookie here! Another one if these.

Hypocrisy alert! You decided to bash the story without offering any sort of reasoning, just being miserable for the sake of being miserable. Now you're claiming your hilarious overreaction and shouting was in self-defense.

I'm too much of a lazy fucktard to say something.

Then shut the fuck up. :ajbemused:

2514085 It's not hypocritical. I just stated that this is one of those stories. What those entails wasn't said, so it may be really bad or just something I read and thought "meh". Still, I did not insult the author. Nor his story.
And I really don't intend to. Ever.

I also didn't bash the story. Doing so would be me writing "this is worse than cancer" and just leave.
(In case you might be wondering, this is just a hypothetical scenario. I do not think this story is worse than cancer)

Overreaction? But I'm chill as a popsicle, ponybro. Sugary, tasty and sticky like one too. :twilightsmile:

Then shut the fuck up. :ajbemused:

Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
From 1 to 10,
How buttmad are you?

2514085 It would be in everyone's best interest to stop this conversation now. Caddy, I love you, but I don't need you to defend me. This person is attempting to get a rise out of others, and the best way to handle it is to just ignore them, I promise. Dropping to their level will not be constructive, because they lack the basic social skills to interact with people on a normal and functional level, so they must subsist on negative attention. We must cease providing the attention they so desperately seek, so that they eventually wither up and die.

tl;dr Don't feed the troll.

2514132 I agree that this conversation has lived its fullest and things are only going downhill from here. Still, I got to reply to the threats being made to me, no?

Just because someone disliked your story and replied to the comments, defending him/herself, it doesn't make him/her a troll, ponybro. I'm really not stroking my e-dick as I reply to you guys.
(No, I'm not being sarcastic either)

PS: It's not nice to imply things about other people when all you know about them is text. I'm really a nice guy/gal who only had to defend myself from those comments, explaining my side. Honest! PM me if you wanna talk something.

PPS: To reiterate: I am a lazy fuck. This is why I have nothing productive to say. :twilightsmile:

Eldorado
Moderator

2514118

For "too lazy a fuck to say anything," you sure say a lot.

From 1 to 10,
How buttmad are you?

-30. To me, you're somewhere between a cockroach and that white stuff that accumulates in the corners of your mouth when you're really thirsty.

2514132
Sometimes, people like this are actually being serious, and I always give them the benefit of the doubt and one or two responses. Probably the greatest friend I've ever made over the internet was someone I called out for bullshit when she was shouting about morality on darf's rape story between Shining and Twilight. I told her to GTFO, we argued, I "fed the troll" for awhile, and then when darf blocked her I sent her a PM and we continued the argument there. Couple days of back-and-forth later, and she actually came around to see she was in the wrong and we became incredibly close friends. So... I don't write people off anymore. I give one response, and if I don't see any hope of the other party accepting any reasonable standard of logic and entering a decent debate, I dismiss them entirely and move on. Believe me, I'm more level-headed than that, and I've better things to do than fight it out over trivia. I just can't resist a debate with a worthy adversary (DualThrone), and am severely disappointed when people like this idiot show up who won't even provide a sporting challenge. So yeah, I'm done.

2514172 What can I say? Chatting is easier than analyzing stories. :twilightblush:

To me, you're something between a cockroach and that white stuff that accumulates in the corners of your mouth when you're really thirsty.

That really isn't very nice. Are you sure you're not mad?

2514172 Alright, at least you're dropping it now. Also, I appreciate the Con-Air reference.

2514132 Feel free to tell me to shut the fuck up and I will. Promise.

Eldorado
Moderator

2514182 Shit yes, I was hoping someone would catch that! I love you.

2514181 See the above.

2514194 I'm really feeling bad that I made you feel bad.
Can we put this behind us?

(I really mean it)

Beautiful story, with an even more beautiful ending. I'm in tears. :heart:

Eldorado
Moderator

2514203 You didn't make me feel bad. I'm laughing my ass off. The whole reason I replied was the same reason I might pick up a scratch-off lottery ticket from the curb. It's either something I can really enjoy, or a useless scrap of trash I can discard without a second thought. You turned out to be the latter.

You're giving yourself way too much credit, boyo.

I have to ask is this it like a one chapter story becouse well it was awesome and personally I think this could becouse even better than it is right now but:raritywink: just a suggestion

2514217 Well, okay, then. :applejackunsure:
Still, that wasn't very nice.

I'll just go.

(I really, REALLY mean what I've said about putting it behind)

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!