Ponies have a strange attitude towards technology. They ride railroads and fly chariots. They have advanced hydroelectric power plants and light their homes with fireflies. They plow their fields on muscle power and invent crazy apparatus for squeezing cider out of apples. They use x-ray and parade around with spears. They play dubstep and listen to cello. They have indoor plumbing and grow rocks in fields. They like horse drawn horse-drawn carriages and take color photographs of them to show their foals.

These are the stories of ponies and their schizotech.

A collection of independent short stories united by the common theme of ponies creatively applying their knowledge and friendship to push the boundaries.
I do not expect this to be a regular thing, but this will get added on to in the future.

Have you ever woken up somewhere you don't recognize? I have, once before. This time was not all that different. Headache? Check. Dry mouth? Check. Upset stomach? Check. Hooves? Uhm, that one is new.

Hi, I'm Bruce and I'm 32. Currently, I'm in a light blue Earth Pony foal's body no one has ever seen before. The rest of Equestria thinks I'm 9 and something really traumatic happened to me. It doesn't help I swear like a sailor and I could really go for a smoke right about now. I just hope that the Everfree Forest, rampaging monstrosities, evil dark abominations against God and the Cutie Mark Crusaders don't kill me before I have just one last drag.

Oh, and ponies are hella creepy when you really think about it. Geez.

A little comedy side project. EDIT: HAHA Main project. More characters to be added if I get that far. Categories might be refined as I write. Entire thing is unplanned except vaguely. Don't Expect excessive cursing to be written out, just hinted at. Oh, and as the character is a 30-ish year old in the body of a 9 year old, sexual jokes might exists but sex itself will not occur.

Special thanks to user Momomojito for the awesome-tastic picture! First fanart, I'm so HAPPY. I've gotten more since then! I should collect it all here. Collected!

Rainbow Dash is a well-known pegasus mare in Ponyville, but her parents know her as a colt, Sonic Dash. When they come to visit, she must confront both her parents and her friends with the truth of her identity. Will her parents accept her as their daughter instead of their son, and how will her friends handle the secret she has kept from them for so long? A story about family, gender identity, growing up with the wrong body, and, of course, friendship.

Frequently Asked Questions

TTS Reading of the entire fiction: Courtesy of the FanFiction Reader on Youtube.

Character List: Courtesy of TruthHut (A work in progress)

Handy is not a happy man at the best of times.

He was even less happy to find himself in an alien world that offended the very laws of physics and got injured for his own stubborn refusal to accept the obvious path fate had apparently laid out for him.

For his trouble he is now on a journey, with the long term goal of finding his way back home, only to find himself involved in plots and machinations so far above his head and cares that he quickly becomes a pawn in a game played by powers who care not for his well-being.

Quite like his life back on Earth if you think about it.

Needless to say, Handy does not care for any of it. He is much more preoccupied with the more immediate and pressing mundane concerns of day to day life a human needs to worry about while in Equestria.

Obtaining a new pair of shoes for example.

All this and one almighty hangover, what's the worst that could happen?

Rated teen for harsh language and minor violence

Proofread by JBL, Jude and Usurper

It's usually boring work, maintaining an Equestrian border crossing. Doubly so if you're stationed at the Badlands crossing, with no incoming and a general populace still too busy licking its wounds to try anything funny. But it pays well, so guards tend not to complain.

But then you get the occasional day where everything goes wrong. Where an errant changeling with an attitude and an extremely punchable face tries to waltz past the station with a cart full of contraband, and sticky gross contraband at that.

If the border guard can get out of this one with all of their brain cells, they're definitely applying for a transfer to Ponyville.

Written as a birthday present for Carapace

The cultists thought they couldn't go wrong with a resurrection of King Sombra. They'd get a cool ruler, rad hallucinations, and he'd probably chain them up and whip them! It was the perfect plan...

Until the police showed up, hit the Dark Lord of Crystals with a paralysis spell, and dragged him off to court.

"All rise, Princess Celestia presiding..."

Inspired by the utter hilarity of naturalbornderpy's 101 Interesting Facts About Draconequi.

There's a lot of unpleasant surprises that can be found in photo albums. A third pony in what you thought was a private moment, inexpertly applied bodypaint, or just evidence of that time that your mother dressed you up like a burrito.

Twilight Sparkle was expecting to come out of Family Night with a few fresh blushes on her cheeks. What she wasn't expecting was a mysterious pair of wings in her baby pictures.

Hopefully Celestia will have some answers.

Many thanks to Present Perfect for supplying the brilliant concept, and to Evehly for the beautiful artwork.

Most ponies don't know every single detail about their friends. And even when certain details are known, they usually don't bother mentioning them without rhyme or reason. For example, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy both know each others' families pretty closely, but nopony's looking for an excuse to remind themselves that Zephyr Breeze is a thing.

Conversely, when your friends first find out about a heretofore-unmentioned sibling, they will probably want details. So when Twilight receives an invitation to her brother's wedding, her friends are naturally curious about him.

Turns out, there's a good reason why she doesn't talk about him.

Written for F*** THIS PROMPT #14.

Rainbow Dash was the Iron Wing. She was a war hero, the Slayer of Shadows, the Liberator of the Crystal Empire, the Wrath of Celestia. And depending on who you ask, she still is.

But the war is over. There's little need for a pony like her in peacetime. So she keeps telling herself that she needs to adjust, that she needs to find a new role to fill in the world that she saved. But Equestria seems content to let her remain what she has become, even though they have no need of a warrior.

"This isn't how it's supposed to be", is something she keeps telling herself. But every time she says it, the only thing she can reply is, "so what should it be?"

One whole year after the close of the war, and Rainbow Dash still doesn't have the answer.

Art by NCMares.

Equestria is a magical place. Almost everything that happens in Equestria happens because of magic. The changing of the leaves in autumn is no exception. It's a beautiful, quiet thing, the sort of experience that makes some ponies really stop and think for a while.

Vinyl Scratch is one of those ponies.