There are a lot of relics, artifacts, and other ancient items of power strewn throughout the world. I should know; I've found safe homes for a lot of them, and even destroyed a few. A good rule of hoof is that the older it is, the more powerful it is. Not because it's old, but because it's survived that long, either because of its own toughness or the defenses its creators put around it.

The Weapon of the Ancients predates written language. Ahuizotl wants it for himself. I can't let that happen.

(Fourth place entry in the April 2015 Writeoff Competition. Prompt: Great Expectations.)

Silver Spoon spins the bottle and becomes rather distraught when it lands on Button Mash instead of — well — anypony else...

Dear Diary,
Looking back, a scientific, step-by-step plan is completely ineffective for social situations (Note to self: don't do them, ever). Inviting Princess Luna to a Pinkie Pie Hearth's Warming party, with a checklist of steps in your head, was an awful idea. There are too many variables that a checklist cannot prepare for, such as an entrancing outfit. The plan resulted in a spectacular failure of when awkward meets anxious.
For future use, a spreadsheet might be better.
- TS

A super-duper, awesomely-wonderful, amazing podcast review of this fic can be found here by Lapis Lazuli and Inky J! Seriously, they're great. <3
More Awesomeness! Doom Pie has done a super-duper reading for this fic! Thank you so much!

Cover art courtesy of the wonderful lovelyneckbeard, which can be found here.

Dinky Doo asks her mother a question.

Derpy Hooves finally reveals a truth.

Story collaboration with Rootbeer Dew, who helped to write up the ending.

Picture by some guy on Deviantart. Doomcakes, I think it was? XD

Popular Section! 5th July, 2014, Saturday! Thank you everyone!

UPDATE - There is a sequel to this story! To read the sequel, look up TheMyth, and his story 'Where Is The Love?'. This is the official sequel that I gave him permission to write up. Thank you everypony for your views and support! You guys and gals helped to make this a special story!

Link to the sequel! Where Is My Love?

After Big Macintosh helps the Mane Six out of a jam, he finds his ordinary life of
peaceful routine thoroughly disrupted by the various misadventures those crazy
ponies always seem to get themselves into.

Artwork provided by the talented Zemious

One night a year, on the Eve of the Summer Sun Celebration, Princess Celestia is sad, at least according to Twilight's observations. She has a plan, a boardgame, and is determined to try to cheer up her mentor.

No clop, but suggestive content.

Finally, after years of begging, Celestia gives Twilight permission to access the Forbidden Wing of the Royal Library, a wing so secret even the other princesses can't access it. Twilight rushes to Canterlot, excited for the research potential.

Then she finds those books…

(There's an FAQ here. Please read that before commenting.)

It has been one of the closest guarded secrets of Canterlot's royalty. Deep in a specially constructed dungeon, surrounded by warding spells and powerful magic barriers, exists an enigma. Within a cage that could only be described as something out of a nightmare, it waits and watches all of Equestria. A creature that cannot age, is immune to disease, does not thirst nor hunger, and resists all injury. But, it also holds secrets and knowledge that could safeguard the kingdom. Its powers are frightening, but it is civil enough for debate when patience permits.

Princess Celestia has sought counsel with the creature before, enduring it making deal after deal for its services. The Princess walks a fine line when dealing with it, knowing full well anything could give it an advantage despite its imprisonment. She has had to go back on her word in these dealings, and from this a deep animosity between them has been born. It is a necessary evil as she is convinced this is a being capable of untold evil far and above anything Equestria has ever dreamed of. So long as it remains within the confines of its cell, her kingdom is made safe. So much magic has been woven to ensure that, there is little chance of escape.

So long as the magic holds, there is no danger. So long as the cage remains strong, the nameless creature stays enthralled in his cavernous dwelling. If that were to change--if the magic failed--not even the wisest could say. But one thing is assured, it does not bode well for Equestria.

This story is a sequel to Where Did Daddy Go?

Even after many years... his love for her never faded... The one, who held a special place in his heart. Well, no more waiting! No more hoping! He was going to find her, and damn anypony to Tartarus that would try to stop him.

Prequel by UniqueSKD
Collaboration with Lucky 424
Edited by Flamer_Brony
Artwork by Neko-Me

Rarity’s friends have noticed that she smells an awful lot like apples lately and want in on it.

Cover art by the inimitable White Diamonds.

There is now a Spanish translation of this story, courtesy of Spaniard Kiwi