• Member Since 25th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen Feb 24th, 2015

Sapidus3


I really need an actual a better avatar.

T

One night a year, on the Eve of the Summer Sun Celebration, Princess Celestia is sad, at least according to Twilight's observations. She has a plan, a boardgame, and is determined to try to cheer up her mentor.

No clop, but suggestive content.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 85 )

Was it Pinkie you left out?

If there's ever been a oneshot more deserving of a feature, I haven't seen it. This is incredible. Seriously, Luna's mane/5 stars.

Commence read.

At least they got to finally play their game.

5514206 It was Spike wasn't it? And also Twilight's wings. Unless Spike isn't in that shot (though I think I see the hint of a shadow) and you're counting the princess part of Princess Twilight as a character (like how character tags used to work on fimfiction.)

beautiful, just beautiful, probably deserves a sequel where it moves from yearly kisses to monthly kisses or more

That was a very sweet story. Totally complete and fine the way it is. But if you wrote a sequel, I'd read it. :pinkiehappy:
Also it was Spike, the small clear spot on the carpet. Excellent job of covering by the way. :raritywink:

5515299 5515317
We have a winner!

This is absolutely beautiful. I... I've come across something truly amazing over here. This is one of the best Twilestia fics I've read.

A small error, though; you sometimes use "Mareopoply" instead of "Mareopoly" . Also--please not that this is just me nitpicking at a really fine level--I think "Maneopoly" is a closer ponification of the game's name.

I didn't feel like this story made any sense whatsoever. Celestia basically acted like a teenager, struting around a moping because the self-described neurotic had a slip of expression that could be taken as hurtful. At no point did it apparently occur to her to treat Twilight (or herself!) like an adult and just TALK about what swiftly became a deeply improper and self-destructive relationship for the two of them. Not to mention that by setting their relationship as starting in what ammounts to Twilight's teens or even tweens (an untold number of years before the show, basically), this fic treads right into that whole "taking advantage of a minor" thing that squicks people out about Twilestia. Also, Twilight isn't the most social of ponies, and Celestia is her neurotic blind-spot, but I hardly doubt even she could be unaware that this cycle of sex and mutual self-loathing the two of them had fallen into was both unusual and unhealthy. In fact, (part of) her problem with Celestia is a neurotic obsession with her perceived ideas of decorum, so even Celestia kissing her should have freaked her the hell out, let alone all the making out and sex they were apparently having. Even barring that this problem is kind of out of character for them, you also really underplayed how destructive this kind of scenario would be to the two of them.

It had a cute ending, but that scene should have taken place within a month of the frst night, not a year. By drawing out the timescale you basically turned a somewhat flawed, but interesting premise into something bizarre and frankly messed up. Hell, I would have dug putting the whole story into one night and just focused of fleshing out and exploring Twilight and Celestia's characters organically from the basic prompt of "Twilight tries to comfort Celestia over a boardgame."

So, yeah, those are my thoughts. Sorry if I'm the guy who rains on the parade.

Aww, that was excellent. It just felt perfect. just right where they almost swapped positions, with Celestia for Twilight instead of like before...I just...Yes. Good. Me likey.

Sapidus3
Sorry bro, but i love twilestia without sex.

5516256
I always love feedback.

In regards to the age issue. The way I have always looked at is that the mane six all seem to be adults at the start of the show. Rarity for example seems to have been running her own business for a few years. At the very least her buisness seems to be established. I figure this places them around twenty six. Old enough to be dealing with serious issues, but young enough that they are still not wise to the ways of the world. I have no idea if this matches up with how most people see things. Given that starting age, things could have been going on between Twilight and Celestia for a number of years without it getting into "squick" territory. However, if you feel that the mane six is like eighteen or something at the start of the show, then yea, I can see how this fic would rub you the wrong way. Even still, you are right that Celestia's actions are inappropriate. There is a reason she apologizes (even if her heart really isn't in it).

I probably could have compressed the story to one night, but then it would have been a very different story (in my mind, the passage of time is key). However, I think I have seen some fics that do the Twilight spends a night with Celestia while Celestia is sad about Nightmare moon thing before, and I wanted to do something different.

I had hoped Celestia's thoughts and reasoning came across in the fic, but if they didn't they didn't, and that's my bad.

I considered going more into the damage the relationship was having on Twilight, but I felt it would have actually distracted from the main focus of the fic and decided just to leave it as "Twilight is depressed."

Once again, thanks for the feedback. Hopefully someday you might read and enjoy one of my other stories.


5516345
Not quite sure I get your comment. Are you saying your prefer platonic Twilestia / Twilestia friend shipping, or just romance that doesn't reference sexual relations?

5516694
Yep, Like in your other stories.

I can forgive the spelling errors, but in Monopoly when you roll doubles you get to go again! :flutterrage:

5516714
Ah, OK. This was something a bit different for me. You'll be happy to hear I have some Twilestia friendships in the work.

5516722
It's because they didn't read the rules closely enough... Not because it's been years since I have played it. Yes, that is certainly not the reason.

5516736
Glad to see that!:pinkiehappy:
Рад слышать это.

5516736 I'm happy to have more shipfics coming, for one. Thank you for writing this one. It was a great way to start the day. :twilightsmile:

Hmmmm, I like the story and its wonderfully written.

But in all honest feedback I feel its a little disappointing at the end? Not really sure why, maybe because it seems like they are friends with benefits and with celestias position over twilight that seems wrong. Have no problem with them in a mutual relationship, bit this doesn't feel like one. Sorry if this doesn't make sense, it's just like it's missing something

You are a beautiful human being, pumping out so much Twilestia in such a short period of time.

At first I thought you'd just tease us with Twilight perma cock-blocking Celestia.

Thank god it ended adorably happily.

5516256 you'r logical, its rare on the internet

The time skips were a bit too abrupt. Could have used some type of scene break to separate the times.

I wrote a review of this story. It can be found here.

I really enjoyed this one, so please don't take anything I say next as any indication to the contrary. Remember, I liked it a lot. ^.^

For me, the ending did two very bad things. First and foremost, it blamed the wrong pony. None of this was Twilight's fault, and I'm rather irritated that the story tries to say it was. For starters, given her estimated age around the time of the pilot episode and how many years this story spans, Twilight was barely a teenager the first night she spent with Celestia. In no way could Celestia expect someone her age to not only be able to process and fully understand all that happened between them, let alone swim through her own feelings, but also to be the one responsible for making the right move. Of course Twilight isn't going to know the right thing to say the next morning (this is unexplored territory that should not be explored at her age), and to hold her accountable for calling Celestia princess "when she didn't want to be" by completely cutting Twilight off and not even discussing where the two of them now stood and what their relationship now meant is absolutely the wrong thing to do. She's taking total advantage of Twilight's ignorance and inexperience and throwing her out into the ocean without a lifeline. The amount that goes unsaid between them is destructive for a pony of Twilight's age, let alone the kind of personality that she has.

Celestia is the adult here; it's her responsibility to not only take the initiative but make sure her and Twilight understand one another, and that Twilight isn't left walking through the minefield of sexuality and love all by herself.

I was waiting for them to finally talk about it in some way by the end, but they never did, and that's the second thing the story did; I feel like the ending was a cop out. By this point, so much has happened and there's so much left unknown, unsaid, and in confusion, that for the story to simply wipe all that emotional complexity away by having Celestia visit Twilight and act like nothing was wrong between them, and then for Twilight to just "get it" and have that be that is...well, very emotionally unsatisfying. I reject the idea that this simple encounter would heal Twilight of all the confusion and unaddressed questions and self-inflicted guilt that have been simmering for years. The ending felt like an emotional dues-ex-machina.

So while I really enjoyed this for how it built a very complex issue between Twilight and Celestia (and I love that it takes place over so much time), I very much disliked how most of that complexity was never addressed, and that the entire blame for everything was lain on Twilight's shoulders, as if she should have known better. All that self-inflicted guilt was apparently deserved, and Celestia gets off scotch free, despite the fact that her actions could easily have seriously screwed Twilight up emotionally, stunting her in so many ways.

Oh my gosh! What a ride! This was beautiful, so many ups and downs. At some points it all seemed good and at others it was almost heartbreaking. Seriously I nearly cried. That ending was brilliant, I'd love to see a sequel to see how this turns out after Twilight becomes a Princess herself.

I thought I was gonna cry, you monster, but then everything went better than expected. Good job.

I would love to see a sequel to this. :twilightblush:

A long time ago, I made a bad decision on the Eve of the Summer Sun Celebration, and it cost me a very important pony.

My first assumption was that she means Luna; then I thought that she wouldn't be quite that sad now that Luna is back, and then I remembered that if Twilight is living in the palace (and doesn't have any friends to play with) then Luna is still gone!

Lovely story, and slightly heartbreaking through out. Of course, we the readers are able to guess what the problem is, and what makes things worse, but Twilight doesn't.

I was worried this was going to have a slightly sadder ending than it did. Kudos on the fic, Sapidus3. Definitely glad I started following you!

Nah, no sequel.
It is better as a standalone IMHO.

--
Some tiny typos:

I’m suppose to be helping you.

supposed

For awhile she hoped that she might get to say something at the Grand Galloping Gala.

For a while

Before I read this, I'm gonna guess what this story is about using only the title then compare my guess to the actual story, I haven't read the description yet or any of the comments. So, the title's one night a year, so one night a year it's Christmas? :pinkiesmile:

Wait, Twilight doesn't seem to know about Luna, did this take place before twilight met the mane 6? :rainbowhuh:

Wait, Twilight brought a board game, well I guess board games are sorta related to christmas. :yay:

It's... Monopoly, MONOPOLY!?!?!?! You brought Celestia MONOPOLY!?!?! Out of all the board games Twilight, just why? :facehoof:

Why are they hugging!?!?!?! :rainbowderp:

They... OMG They just kissed!!!!!!!!! :pinkiesick: I give up on reading this fic, it obviously has nothing to do with christmas, it takes place in the summer, it has monopoly, and it has kissing! :pinkiesick: I guess this fic isn't for kids. :twilightblush: I'm just going to awkwardly walk over to another fic now.:twilightsheepish:

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! (Arms flail about in giddy from the amount of adorb)

At some point along the line Twilight was fairly certain that she was no longer able to call herself a virgin. that she stopped being a virgin, but was not exactly sure which year she had lost her virginity. When her mother had told her all about the birds and the bees, the discussion and questions afterwards had all been about a mare and a stallion. Even when Twilight went to the library to perform her own independent research, she had been unable to determine what counted as “sex” for two mares. Being too embarrassed to look at any given book for more than a few pages may have contributed to part of the difficulty, but she was convinced that the library was woefully lacking in proper literature on this point. At one point Twilight had even come dangerously close to asking Cadance for advice. Still, whatever it was, she was fairly certain they had done it.

Aww! :pinkiesmile: Statutory rape has never been cuter!

A bit melancholy, but I like it. Twilight is so clueless sometimes, I swear. :facehoof:

5516694 It's always funny how different readers experience a story in a different way. See, I had pages worth of thoughts going through Celestia's mind on the 'board game' nights and over the years and also many interpretations of them.

And of course Twilight was hurting; but Celestia was hurting just as much if not even more. She became lonelier with every morning-after 'Princess' and I really felt sorry for her. If anything, she made the impression of being just as inexperienced and clueless as Twilight although we didn't get to read her thoughts as the story is told from Twilight's perspective. She also never put pressure on Twilight.

As for the age difference: I see Celestia as ageless, even forever young. With the playful and at times mischivous streak she even from time to time appears with in the show, she gives me the impression of not being truly 'old' but just having been around for a very, very long time.
In this light it'd be perfectly reasonable that she'd connect with someone like Twilight if only she could get past the rank-difference.

Anyway, to cut this essay short: everything fits together, the pacing is fast but fitting, I loved your story and it receives a fav. Thanks for sharing.

Just one question. Why would Mareopoly have a thimble? No fingers! :twilightsheepish:

one thing wears the sex? they only made out

5523378
I tagged it for sex because it is rated teen but there is reference to sexual content and it is mentioned that they have sex. The story description mentions that its not clop. I try to avoid misleading people in the description, and apologize if I failed.

5523274
I... Stupid ponies not having fingers. Maybe they have hoof sized thimbles.

5518061
You are right that it seems like the ending implicitly blames Twilight. That is not something I consciously intended. I'm not entirely dissatisfied with that, being that the story is from Twilight's perspective and that's what Twilight does. If I was going to do this story again, I would, however, probably go back and add some line that makes it clear that Celestia blames herself (even if Twilight doesn't get it). I wouldn't say Celestia gets off free. If the story was told from Celestia's perspective I'm sure that there would be plenty of Celestia Angst (Celestangst, Angstlestia?).

I knew that having Twilight "get it" without a long drawn out conversation was a gamble that would not pay off with some readers. I really did not want an overly long drawn out conversation, and wanted to let Twilight have an actual moment of non-cluelessness.

no need i guess i did not notice

5523397

You are right that it seems like the ending implicitly blames Twilight. That is not something I consciously intended.

I don't think it's completely misplaced. I realized even in elementary school what it meant when a girl started kissing you, so this is less a feature of her being young and more of her, personally, being really, really dense and having OCD-induced intrusive thoughts.

I do like the story in general, too. The theme made clear up-front, stuck to tightly and executed very cleanly, while alluding to the tension between the two without becoming vulgar. Nothing that really intensely grabs your attention, but uniformly good without any quality lapses.

5523397

I'm not entirely dissatisfied with that, being that the story is from Twilight's perspective and that's what Twilight does.

Hm, that's a good point. I do still think Celestia gets off free, though, if at least because the story isn't from her perspective. Yes, we do see her get more and more irritated as the years go on (and are left to surmise the reason for ourselves, which I have no problem with), but Celestia suffering or not suffering angst or guilt isn't exactly what I mean by saying she gets off free.

More so that what she's done to Twilight is wrong and harmful; having sexual relations at such a young age, never talking about it with her and thus leaving Twilight to sort through her own emotions at an age where she can't do that in regards to sex, and most importantly, allowing twilight to have full responsibility for her actions, such as calling her "princess" the rest of the year. What I mean by this is that Celestia takes Twilight saying "princess" to heart and gets hurt by it; she's assuming Twilight knows exactly what she's doing; after all, someone accidentally insulting you is different than them purposefully doing it, right? If you know or even think it was an accident you don't get worked up and probably try to find a way to communicate the insult to them; if you think they did it on purpose, you get upset and hurt, and might shut yourself off from them. This is what Celestia does to Twilight each morning after; and while you can call it an honest mistake, it's a really, really dumb one; she ought to know better, given Twilight's age and position and personality. But see, rather than saying to Twilight "Twilight, I thought we agreed to not call me princess" in order to let her know where she would like the boundaries of their relationship to now be, she stays totally mum on the matter and instead acts hurt by it, as if Twilight is self-aware enough to purposefully say "I don't want to be close to you" by calling her princess again.

None of this makes the story bad; in fact, it makes it really good. It's why I liked it so much. The best stories often have good people doing very bad things. But there's no point where we see Celestia realize or come to terms with what she's done; she doesn't ever have to openly face the consequences of it, what it's done to Twilight. Twilight never gets to say "I've been really confused over the years and hurt and I don't know what I did wrong to you and it's killing me" and Celestia never says "that's my fault, I should have done such and such, I'm sorry." That's what I mean by saying she gets off free.

However...looking at it in the light that the story isn't saying Twilight was in the wrong, it's just herself doing it, and having Celestia get off free...it turns it into a tragedy, in my eyes. Twilight is essentially in a harmful relationship, and instead of the problems being righted or her escaping, she blames herself for everything and continues it, with the guilty member not changing their ways any. And while I doubt the story was trying to portray anything like a tragic ending, I'm fine with that interpretation ^.^

And remember Sapidus3, I did really like this. It's one of the reasons I reacted strongly to the ending; the story got me invested and rose my hopes up high. Most Twilestia stories don't do that, because the majority are unoriginal clichés of the genre. I think you managed to do something rather original here, and that's great in my book :D

I knew that having Twilight "get it" without a long drawn out conversation was a gamble that would not pay off with some readers. I really did not want an overly long drawn out conversation, and wanted to let Twilight have an actual moment of non-cluelessness.

That's fine. Whenever an author does something I don't like, if they do it purposefully and with reasons, then I really don't consider it "bad writing", because they knew what they were doing. I may disagree with their choices, and here I personally would've liked a long conversation, but that's just my preference when it comes to Twilight and Celestia stories. And I don't think a drawn out ending is even absolutely necessary for there to be good emotional catharsis here, or to keep Celestia from getting off free.

wlam #47 · Jan 19th, 2015 · · 1 ·

5524409

More so that what she's done to Twilight is wrong and harmful; having sexual relations at such a young age, never talking about it with her and thus leaving Twilight to sort through her own emotions at an age where she can't do that in regards to sex, and most importantly, allowing twilight to have full responsibility for her actions, such as calling her "princess" the rest of the year.

There's no actual indication about what age this occurs at and how long it lasts. If I were to go by character voice, I'd have to say that first year Twilight doesn't sound that much younger than last year Twilight, although a lot more insecure. Don't let your own hangups make you invent facts there. A lot of people I personally know are perfectly fine despite having started sexual activity as early as 14, or even a bit younger.

5522272

Kids shouldn't really be on this site in the first place. I'm pretty sure we have a lower age limit on this site.

just kranking out the stories now, i cant keep up lol, fantastic feeling as a FimFic regular

5516694 I happen to agree with you on the age of the Mane 6. They're obviously independent adults. I'm not sure how OLD exactly that it means they are, but certainly they've all been considered adults in their world for some time now.

Which means they've been past the age of consent just as long. If, as author, that means you've decided that Twilight was past the age of consent by the time this story started, I'm willing to go with that.

Now, what age Equestria considers adulthood to be... that's a different story.

Oh. And nice story.

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