A collection of short stories. A little bit of this, a little bit of that. All, hopefully, about what it means to be human.

Except, you know, with ponies.

I'm afraid of Changeling: Drone 42531 is insecure and decides he needs to see a professional, whether or not the professional wants to see him. [Comedy] [Random]

One thousand and one: A family keeps a long vigil, regardless of the cost. [Sad]

Uncoordinated: Twilight Sparkle and the Cutie Mark Crusaders conduct an experiment. Accidentally. [Comedy] [Random]

But the Greatest of These: Every pony has to grow up someday. Every dragon, too. [Slice of Life]

Wonder: Pinkie Pie's farm is grey. The sky is grey. Her sister is grey. The world is grey. Until, one day, it isn't. [Slice of Life]

The Apple of my Eye: Apple Bloom finally gets her cutie mark. It's not what she wanted. [Comedy] [Random]

Bookworm: Twilight Sparkle finds an odd message in her books. [Dark]

At the End of the Day: Just what does Pinkie Pie do in her free time? [Slice of Life]

The House at the End of the World: Some promises shouldn't be kept. [Adventure] [Dark]

Pantone Perfect: Rarity and Twilight Sparkle enjoy a refreshing argument at the spa. [Comedy] [Random]

Medium Rare: In which we learn the secret, scarring horror that was Fluttershy's first experience with a dragon. [Comedy] [Random]

One Thousand Flowers: How long do gifts take to grow? [Slice of Life]

Tempest: A pegasus teaches his son the nature of the rain. [Slice of Life]

No Natural Predators: The days have grown longer as the world winds down. [Adventure] [Dark]

Six More Weeks: The first day of Spring is a wonderful time to be a pony. Just make sure you get the date right. [Comedy]

Derecho: A daughter starts a long quest in a forgotten city.[Slice of Life]

O Death, where is thy sting? Human Flash Sentry travels across the multiverse. [Adventure]

The Lotus Eaters: Heaven is different things to different people. A Friendship is Optimal vignette.[Slice of Life]

Tour of Duty: Duty can be lighter than a feather, or heavier than a mountain. [Slice of Life]

Nickel-Iron-Cobalt: An explorer discovers a world without life. Perhaps. [Anthro][Adventure]

(Based on prompts from the Thirty Minute Pony Stories tumblr. All written in 30 minutes – give or take – unless otherwise noted.)

Twilight Sparkle suddenly finds herself caught up in a grand tradition for the immortal rulers of Equestria: holding their own funerals. What can possibly go wrong? The answer: a lot. A whole lot.

Sex tag is for only the mention of it happening. Nothing truly explicit happens.

A commission from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

This story is a sequel to Little Bea

Pregnancy can take a toll on any mare, but it seems to be hitting Trixie harder than most. Flam, for his part, couldn't be happier (even if the little bundle of joy was unplanned) and he's been bending over backwards to jolly her along. But he's getting the nagging feeling there's something she's not telling him.

It's been two years since Chrysalis and her hive's reformation, but tensions are high as ponies are still getting used to the idea of working with changelings. Twilight Sparkle, determined to open up Chrysalis to the idea of friendship, convinces her to attend the annual royal meeting. To everypony else, it's simply a mundane meeting to catch up on current events. To Chrysalis, she would be in a room with all those who were once her mortal enemy.

No pressure.

Featured: 8/10/16 - You guys a freaking incredible! Thank you all for reading!

Rated for suggestive, sexy themes.

Special thanks to Setokaiva for proofreading. I do not own the pic, nor know who owns it, but if anyone can point me in the right direction to get permission I would appreciate that.

This story is a sequel to Changeling Courtship Rituals

Queen Chrysalis attacked Canterlot, brainwashed Twilight Sparkle's brother, kidnapped her former foalsitter, defeated her mentor in combat, and conquered her kingdom. She kidnapped the sisters of Twilight's friends, turned them against one another, and tried to drain all of Twilight's magic. Queen Chrysalis has, at every opportunity, done her very best to utterly destroy Twilight Sparkle's life.

For some reason, this has not caused the pony to fall in love with her.

However, due to Twilight's misunderstanding of changeling customs, it does mean they are now married. Twilight eventually managed to tell the Queen the truth, but she forgot that whether it's a kingdom or a heart, changelings conquer.

And since the changeling way of conquest didn't work, Chrysalis is determined to try the pony way. The only problem is, of course, she has no idea what that is. But she knows someone who does: Princess Cadance.

Now, with the absolutely sincere help of her mortal enemy, the pony she once locked in the caves beneath Canterlot while trying to steal her husband on their very wedding day, Queen Chrysalis is going to woo the sister-in-law of that very pony.

Surely this is the most perfect plan ever devised.

***

Proofread by ShutterflyYay.

Takes place roughly after season five (so Starlight Glimmer is running around occasionally)

After his little... er... misunderstanding with Tirek, Discord seemed eager to attone for his crimes. That's why Princess Celestia decided that perhaps it wouldn't be such a terrible idea to give him a little job. Well, never mind. Now that he's figured out that the job wasn't really all it seemed, what's the worst the all-powerful Master of Chaos could do?

This story is a sequel to Somepony Tries to Sell Twilight Insurance

Ponies were very surprised when Jackpot Enterprises' managing director, Crystal Jackpot himself, started allowing Ponyville's richest residents to insure their properties with his company - not least because the last thing anypony ever expected was that Jackpot Enterprises would do something enterprising. However, they were even more surprised when a crippling blow was dealt the idea by none other than Princess Twilight Sparkle.
Not only did she not have her castle insured: she also urged every single one of her friends - her rich, powerful friends - not to take insurance out either. Nopony would suggest that Jackpot was a resentful stallion - nopony who didn't want to find himself homeless within the week, anyway - but it was, all the same, surprising for Twilight when just about everypony she knew took out insurance against, er, her.

Ballpoint Smudge has one job. It's not an easy one, but it's one he's determined to do to the best of his ability. The only problem is that as soon as he meets Twilight Sparkle, everything he's ever learned about princesses goes flying out of the window. He was expecting her to be regal, haughty and bossy. Instead she's warm, friendly and welcoming. Perhaps she's genuinely a nice pony? Nah. It's got to be a test.

Based on an idea by Ambrose Bierce, from his excellent Devil's Dictionary. Just look up 'Insurance'.

Featured at 12.30 GMT on 15/06/2016. I am very pleased indeed about that.

"Shining? You think Mom and Dad might've been kidnapped by ninjas?" Twilight Sparkle nervously asked her brother.

"Looks like it," Shining told his sister openly. "Why else would they be so late?"

Thus began the night of a thousand fibs.

This story is a sequel to The Face I'll Wear

Dear Small Pony Book,

Hello. My name is Thorax. I am a changeling formerly of the Badlands Hive, ruled by the terrible Queen Chrysalis. Nowadays, I am fortunate to call the Crystal Empire home, and their Royal Family my friends.

Since I'm rather new to living in pony society—without orders to infiltrate, of course—my new friends have been doing their very best to help me get acclimated to this strange, alien way of life. To this end, Princess Cadence has instructed me to tell you of my experiences so that we might use this as time to reflect together. However, I do find it strange. How am I to discuss my day to day interactions with a book? Especially one without a name? You can't not have a name, that would just be rude. So, I will just have to figure one out for you.

I'm not sure why Cadence is laughing at that, or why Shining Armor is groaning. This is a very serious issue.

These ponies are strange. But I don't think I'd have them any other way.

A little thing for me to fiddle with when I'm bored. Updates will likely be sporadic. Tagged as a prequel/sequel to The Face I'll Wear because it will explore some of the same themes and will show events before and after the story.

Preread by Timaeus.