Six ponies and one young dragon sat around the table in the throneroom of Twilight's castle. Twilight herself was slumped over on the table, face down, hooves limply splayed out next to her head. Every once in awhile, she let out a deep sigh.
"And… she's been like this for how long?" asked Applejack, cocking an eyebrow.
"About a day," Starlight said with a shrug. "She was fine after she came back from Canterlot, but then yesterday she got some sort of a letter."
With another groan, Twilight pushed an envelope out from under her face, sending it sliding across the table. It stopped in front of Fluttershy, who hesitantly picked it up.
"Oh," she said sadly after looking through the papers inside for a moment. "It's from the palace. It's… the forms Twilight needs to fill out to divorce Queen Chrysalis."
"I'm going to lose her," moaned Twilight into the table, as the other ponies looked at her with varying degrees of sympathy. "I messed up everything and I can't get over what she's done, so now I can't love her even though I do and I'm going to be all alone forever—"
"No, Twilight, everything's going to be just fine!" Pinkie said cheerfully, bouncing up and down next to Twilight's chair. "We can figure this out! You just need to cheer up and give it a good think! And there's no better way to do that than with a PARTY!"
She slammed her party cannon onto the table and set it off right next to Twilight's head. The explosion of confetti blew the alicorn's mane off to the side and decorated it with confetti, but otherwise had no effect.
"I'm sorry, Pinkie," said Twilight despondently, "but I don't think a party can help me right now."
Pinkie, staring at Twilight, blinked. Then she blinked a few more times. "I know the words you just used, but I don't understand the way you used them," she said finally.
"Look, I don't see what the problem is," said Rainbow Dash, waving a hoof dismissively as Pinkie slunk back to her seat. "Who cares if you got some papers from the palace? Just don't sign them."
"It's not that easy, Rainbow," sighed Twilight. "If I don't sign them, the divorce will be contested. Then we'll have to go to court to settle it, and… I'd rather not put Chrysalis through all that."
"Well, what if the papers 'accidently' got destroyed? There's a lot of candles in your study, right? So—"
"It's a felony to destroy official palace documents."
"Okay, then what if you lost them? I can hide them somewhere you'll never find them!"
"Underneath one of the tables at Sugarcube Corner," Twilight said with a sigh.
"How did you know—I mean, no, I'm talking somewhere really hidden!"
"Behind your framed and autographed portrait of Spitfire."
"Stop it!"
"The point is… there's a time limit on this. If I don't sign and return the papers soon enough, it becomes a court issue. Then it becomes a media circus, and I'd really like to avoid that. Not just for myself, but…" Twilight sighed again. "If I just sign the papers, this will all end quietly. There will be some noise when it gets out, sure, but Chrysalis will be safe from that. She'll be in her hive, and you can be sure none of the changelings will let any reporters in.
"But if I turn it into a contested divorce, if we have to go to court, she'll have to see me again. That's the last thing she needs when she's trying… trying to get over me. And after what she already did—admitting I never loved her, vowing to all of Equestria that she would win me over—putting her through another gauntlet of reporters when she has to go to the courtroom would be cruel. I can't do that to her."
"Okay, then what if we delay it somehow?" asked Rainbow Dash. "We could—"
"Dash, please." Twilight finally raised her head, a tired, resigned smile on her face. "I appreciate you trying to help, but… I don't think there's anything that can be done. I think it's over."
"This isn't just about you," huffed Rainbow Dash, sitting back and crossing her forelegs. "Other ponies are going to be affected by this."
"What are you talking about?" asked Twilight, tilting her head to the side in puzzlement. "Are you really that concerned about my romantic relationships?"
"No, it's just…" Rainbow Dash looked around at her friends looking back at her, and sighed. "Look, Queen Chrysalis really likes you. Like, a lot. You make her happy. And that makes the changelings happy. And… they're really cool, okay? After I fought them off during your wedding—"
"CoughBLACKEYEcough!" Applejack suddenly started coughing into her hoof. "CoughTWOBROKENRIBScough!"
"After I fought them off," continued Rainbow Dash loudly, "We went to a bar and had a few drinks. It's not like there was actually any bad blood between us. And… well, like I said, they're actually pretty cool. I've started hanging out with a couple of them. We even fight every once in a while. Well, more like sparring, I guess. That whole hivemind thing is really annoying too because as soon as one figures out something that works against me they all know it. It's been taking everything I have just to keep up with them!"
"CoughKICKEDYOURFLANKUPANDDOWNPONYVILLELASTWEEKcough!"
"It sounds like you've got something in your throat there, Applejack," growled Rainbow Dash, glaring across the table at the smirking farm pony. "Do you need a pitcher of water for that? Like, upside your head maybe?"
"Careful now, sugarcube," Applejack said with a challenging grin. "I might be a changeling, and then you'd really be in trouble."
Fluttershy let out a gasp. "But you're not, are you?"
"Would it matter if I was?" asked Applejack, shrugging.
"Look, Twilight." Rainbow Dash turned back to her, dismissing the other ponies. "All I'm saying is, if you actually do sign those papers, everypony will be miserable. Queen Chrysalis, the changelings, and even you. I don't know if you do love her or not, but it's pretty obvious you care about her a lot. It’s just…”
She took a deep breath, then continued. “Look, you’re my friend, and the changelings are my friends, and I just want you to be happy, okay? And… I think you staying with Queen Chrysalis would make all of you happy.”
“You do?” asked Twilight breathlessly, and Rainbow Dash nodded uncomfortably. “Why?”
“Oh, geeze…” Dash squirmed in her seat, but she was no match for Twilight’s wide, hopeful eyes, and she finally slumped down. “It was just this look you gave her sometimes, you know? You’d smile, and… okay, this is really sappy, but… you looked like she meant the world to you. And even when you got mad and yelled at her, it always seemed like you were never really angry. Just disappointed. Like you weren't surprised she'd done whatever it was that made you angry, but you wanted more out of her. And, well… I think that's how you act when you love somepony.”
“Dash…” Twilight was trying to blink back a few tears, reaching a hoof out across the table to the blue pegasus. “Thank you. I never knew you had so much insight into relationships—“
“Alright, cut it out,” grumbled Rainbow Dash. “I’m just telling you what I saw. Don’t go trying to turn me into another Rarity or something, all obsessed with romance novels and trying to get ponies to fall in love.” She gestured across the table, at the throne with three diamonds on its back that was currently occupied by Starlight Glimmer. “Besides, we had enough trouble sneaking in here without being noticed. I don't think all of you could have gotten past Rarity and me.”
Twilight made a face, then it relaxed into a smile. "Thank you, though, Dash. Seriously."
Dash waved a hoof in nonchalance, and Twilight sat up, straightening her back and looking determinedly at her friends. For the first time since they'd seen her that day, she looked back to her normal self.
"This is exactly why I came to talk to you all," she said confidently, tapping a hoof on the table. "I know that with your help, I can figure out how to confront my feelings. After all, you all support me in this."
Silence raced around the table, as most of her friends fidgeted nervously and did their best to avoid eye contact.
"None of you think I should stay together with Chrysalis?" she asked timidly.
"I do!" said Spike from her side, enthusiastically waving a claw.
Rainbow Dash raised her hoof, frowning around the table at the others. Fluttershy kind of shrugged her shoulders, looking like she wanted to raise her hoof but ultimately not doing so. Applejack's hoof made it almost halfway up, then slowly descended back to the tabletop. Pinkie Pie continued to stare off into space. And Starlight didn't move at all, her forelegs resolutely crossed over her chest.
"Why?" asked Twilight, ears drooping, her voice sounding small and lost.
"Because she's mean, Twilight." Fluttershy, to everyone's surprise, was the first one to speak up. She even had a bit of a frown on her face. "Gilda mean, almost. But at least Gilda didn't enjoy it the way Chrysalis does. She thinks it's funny to push ponies, or trip them, or call them inferior.
"She's nice to you, but… not anyone else. And we know you like her, and she really likes you. It's not that we don't want the two of you together, especially if it's what you want… but we're afraid that she might not be right for you. You're the Princess of Friendship, and it just seems like you should have someone friendly as your special somepony."
"You don't think maybe someone who's kind of unfriendly would work?" asked Twilight pleadingly. "I-I could teach her about friendship! Doesn't that make more sense than someone who's just like me?"
"I'm not saying it wouldn't work, that you two couldn't be happy together," said Fluttershy, lowering her head and looking up at Twilight with nervous eyes. "J-just… we're worried about you. I'll support you no matter what you want to do, I'm just not sure how I feel about having Queen Chrysalis around more."
"Oh. That's… understandable, I suppose."
Twilight looked down at the table and sighed, and Fluttershy frowned. "I'm sorry, Twilight, I didn't mean—"
"No, Fluttershy, it's okay," Twilight cut her off with a raised hoof. "The fact that you'll stand by me no matter what decision I make means a lot to me. And I can understand that you might not be excited about Chrysalis becoming a permanent part of our lives, even if you are happy for me."
Twilight shifted her gaze to the farm pony who was currently tapping her hoof on the table and frowning in thought. "What about you, Applejack? Just a few days ago you were fine with the idea of us staying married. You even seemed upset that I hadn't decided yet. Well, I suppose you had a few reservations about the whole assassination thing…"
"And I still do." Applejack looked up, eyes level as she met Twilight's gaze. "But that ain't my problem with the Queen. Or, not the part I'm concerned with right now. Fluttershy's right, though. It just doesn't feel like Chrysalis is right for ya. She's… dishonest. I don't mean lyin'—even I gotta admit, I don't think I've ever heard her straight up tell a lie, at least not while she's walkin' around as herself—but not lyin' and being honest are two different things.
"She's… slippery. She sneaks around. I know she's a changeling, and that's just how they are and we shouldn't judge them... but it sets my teeth on edge. A lie of omission is still a lie, and she seems perfectly happy tellin' all of those she wants."
"So, you think she's wrong for me too?"
"Well, now, I didn't say that. She does seem to make you awfully happy, and I ain't gonna say you should stay away from somepony who treats you so nicely. It's jus'... I think she might be a bad influence on you. You like her, and you accept what she's doing, or at least shrug it off, and the next thing we know you're acting like her too, all manipulative and what not."
"Oh." Twilight looked at Applejack guiltily. "Is this about how I lied to all of you about loving her in the first place?"
"Shoot no, Twi." Applejack gave her a grin. "Matter of fact, I happen to think the only one you were lyin' to about that was yourself."
Twilight blushed, a smile on her face. "Well, m-maybe…"
"It's like Fluttershy said, we're just worried about you, is all. We just want to make sure your special somepony is someone who can treat you right, the way we want to see our friend treated. And we're just having trouble gettin' Queen Chrysalis to fit into that image, even after seein' how she's been actin' towards you over the last few months."
"She really can be very nice," Twilight said insistently. "It's just that you aren't around her enough, and she tends to reserve a lot of her affection for the hive, and me. And she always has to be 'a true Queen' out in public… you don't get to see what she's really like."
"I'll admit, y'all got a point there," said Applejack with a nod. "So what is she like in private? What is it about her you like so much?"
"Well…"
Twilight, facedown on the bed, groaned into the sheet as Chrysalis's hooves worked their way up her spine, and the changeling let out a small chuckle.
"You really need to relax more," she chided the pony, who squirmed beneath her. "You know, I spent a year in Canterlot disguised as a masseuse before I managed to get ahold of Cadance, and not once did I have a customer whose muscles were as tense as yours can get."
"That's not exactly the kind of story that makes me want to relax…" grumbled Twilight, any further attempts at a reprimand fading away into a long sigh as Chrysalis put a hoof directly between her wings and dug it in with all her force. Unlike the ponies at the spa, Chrysalis had enough power to break apart the stiffness in Twilight's alicorn muscles, and she knew she could use that strength without hurting the pony.
"Now, now, conquests and kidnappings are actually great ways to relieve stress." Chrysalis let out a throaty chuckle, increasing the speed of her massage. "How would you like to give it a try? Say, Canterlot, a few days from now…"
"Mmm, sorry, but I'm onto your tricks," Twilight sighed. "You're going to have to do better if you want to bribe me into something like that…"
"Bribe, you say?"
Chrysalis's hooves start to travel down her back, moving in small circles and breaking up the pockets of tension they found. But they didn't stop, continuing down until they were just above her hips, slowly massaging her sides. Twilight let out a soft moan; Chrysalis had shifted her position slightly, and she could just feel the changeling's breath, hot on one of her ears. Slowly, Chrysalis's hooves moved inwards, stopping just above the small of her back. For a moment, they seemed about to move downwards, then instead swept upwards in a simple back rub, gently massaging the pony's back rather than giving the deep, tension-relieving strokes they had been earlier.
Twilight did her best to stifle a groan. She knew exactly what Chrysalis was doing, and she wasn't going to give the changeling the pleasure of knowing her attempts to turn this into anything more intimate than the kind of massage one might receive from a spa—a reputable spa—were bearing fruit. Of course, Chrysalis, with her hooves pressed firmly into Twilight's back, felt the groan anyway, and let out another chuckle.
The pressure on her back suddenly disappeared, and for a moment Twilight wondered what was going to happen next. Then one of her wings was firmly grasped in two hooves and pulled, and she grunted as sore, underused muscles were suddenly stretched to their full extent.
"You need to fly more," tsk'd Chrysalis, shaking her head. "It's not good to keep these wings folded up all the time."
"You sound like Rainbow Dash," grumbled Twilight.
Then she gasped as Chrysalis began to preen her wing. Twilight's own teeth were flat and blocky, and did a serviceable enough job cleaning her feathers and pulling out broken ones. But Chrysalis's teeth were pointed, and she enjoyed letting them scrape along the skin of Twilight's wing, which sent a wonderful shiver of pleasure along the pony's spine.
The massage was nice, and the teasing of something more had been… intriguing, to say the least, but this was pure bliss, and Twilight let out a sigh and melted down onto the bed as Chrysalis slowly worked her way along the wing.
Twilight's friends stared at her. She hadn't said a word after trailing off, but her face had gone an alarming shade of red as she stared into her own memories.
"She treats me like I'm the only thing in the world she cares about," said Twilight finally, blushing even harder as she realized exactly what she had just been thinking about in front of all her friends. "And… she has strong hooves and sharp teeth."
"I'm… not going to ask what you mean by that last part," said Applejack, a puzzled and slightly embarrassed look on her face. She glanced away, drumming one hoof on the table, then sighed and turned back.
"Look, Twi," she said, face stern, "I gotta be honest with you. And not just because of my element. Queen Chrysalis is… not a pleasant pony to be around most of time. I'll be the first to admit she's not quite as bad as we thought, and I've actually seen her be downright kind once or twice to ponies who weren't even you. But she's still one of the meanest, orneriest critters I've ever met. I ain't never seen somepony get so mad about the number of sprinkles on their cupcake! And that just ain't the kind of pony I think you should spend your time with, let alone the rest of your life.
"But… she loves you. Shoot, anypony can see that! I can't imagine anything else that would make that changeling do some of the things I've seen her do for you. I don't think there are many ponies that would give you everything the way she does. Or give up some of the things she has. And just looking at the way you're sufferin' makes me think you feel the same way about her, even if you can't get over all the things she's done.
"That might make me okay with the two of you stayin' married. You ain't just gonna forget what she's done, but you can forgive her, I think, and even somepony like her deserves to have somepony who loves her. Plus, since you won't forget, you won't be lettin' her try something like that again, and I doubt she can change who you are. So all them worries I have about her corruptin' you probably mean about as much as the slop I feed the pigs. Heck, if anything, you might actually make her nicer."
"Applejack…?" asked Twilight quietly. "Does that mean…"
She trailed off, and Applejack shook her head. "Nope. I ain't sayin' the two of you should stay hitched. But I ain't sayin' y'all shouldn't either. I'm sayin'... I trust you. Same as I said when I first found out you'd married that Queen. I think you know what you want to do, and I don't think it's my place to tell you either way. You don't need any of us to tell you what to do."
Twilight stared at her for a moment, then gave her first real, confident smile of the day. "Thank you, Applejack. That means a lot."
"No big deal, ma'am," drawled Applejack, with a grin and tip of her hat.
"So, then," said Twilight, shifting her gaze, "that leaves…"
"The pony that Chrysalis has done her best to kill, torture and/or drive out of the castle," confirmed Starlight, with a sharp nod of her head, and Twilight winced.
"That's not—"
"Fair?" asked Starlight, arching an eyebrow. "A completely reasonable description of the things she's done? Exactly what happened?"
"I-I was going to say it's not the full story—"
"Oh, right. I forgot the part where she did all of that just because she couldn't stand you living in the same building as another pony. That does make everything she's done completely understandable. Sorry for overexaggerating."
"She's just kind of protective—"
"Twilight, she's a jealous monster!" Starlight banged a hoof meaningfully on the table. "And I know a thing or two about being a jealous monster."
"Of course she's jealous, she loves me!" huffed Twilight. "And we're married! How did you expect her to react to me living with another pony while she had to stay in her hive most of the time?"
"Not with attempted murder!"
"That just means she respects you." Twilight looked at Starlight's face and winced. "I'm not saying it's a good thing, it's just how she is. And she did tone it down after I asked her too, didn't she?"
"Oh, yes, it's been fantastic," said Starlight, voice dripping with sarcasm as she rolled her eyes. "After all, now I only have to worry about being crippled by a Changeling Queen who's mad with jealousy over a completely platonic student–teacher relationship."
"Wait, crippled? That's not right, I told her nothing more than mangled." Twilight winced again at Starlight's expression. "Sorry, sorry, bad joke."
"Twilight, that's my problem, right there." Starlight leaned forward, scowling. "You let her just… get away with everything! She burns down a building? Oh, she paid to have it rebuilt, and now she knows she's not supposed to do that kind of thing. She tries to kill me? Oh, she's just a little jealous that we live together, she'll only try to wound me now. She tries to kill the Princesses? Oh, she's just trying to assert her dominance, it isn't serious."
"Starlight, she doesn't—"
"Don't tell me she doesn't mean it! You know she does! The only thing, the only thing holding her back is that you've told her she can't do any of those things. You're relying completely on trust, that the maniacal villain is so in love with you that she's willing to put aside everything else she wants in her life just because you say so."
"Um, sorry, Starlight, but it sounds like you're actually arguing that I should stay with Chrysalis," said Twilight meekly.
"Do you know what the most infuriating thing is?" Starlight asked after a long, uncomfortable moment of glowering at Twilight. "She's never had to apologize for any of the things she's done. Queen Chrysalis tried to take over Equestria, she tried to enslave everypony, and what do you say? 'Oh well, changelings will be changelings'. She hasn't had to grovel and beg for everypony's forgiveness! She doesn't have to spend every single day trying make up for the things she's done! She doesn't have to do friendship lessons!"
"Starlight, what…" Twilight cocked her head to the side. "I'm not quite sure I follow what you're saying."
"DON'T YOU THINK I WANT TO TAKE OVER EQUESTRIA TOO?!" yelled Starlight, slamming one hoof to the table and pushing herself up with it while holding the other to her chest. "I've filled up three notebooks with plans since I came to live here! Oh, but I can't act on any of them, can I? No, the slightest hint that I'm backsliding and I'm sure I'll get rainbows in places rainbows aren't meant to go.
"But then little miss perfect changeling comes along, shakes her flank in your face and gives you a ring, and suddenly you're completely fine with a 'former' villain who gets to be your friend and try to take over Equestria at the same time. Suddenly it's 'cute' and 'amusing'."
Twilight blinked disbelievingly at Starlight. "Are… are you jealous of her?"
"No!" Starlight sat back down with a huff, crossing her forelegs again.
"Listen, Starlight…" Twilight hesitate for a moment, then continued. "I'll always be your friend. You know that, right? But… I also have other friends. And a pony like Chrysalis is a very special friend who means more to me than my other friends. That doesn't mean that you and all my friends are any less important or special to me than you were before, just that my feelings for Chrysalis are… different. You see, when two ponies really like each other—"
"Oh, Celestia." Starlight buried her face in her hooves. "Twilight, I am well aware of what love and marriage are and what they mean. I am not jealous and I don't feel like she is somehow going to 'steal' you away from me! I'm just worried that you're giving her too much leeway. And it's a bit of a double standard, too. I get forced to apologize and start learning about friendship, but you just wave off everything she does? Why were my attempts to take over Equestria so much worse?!"
"You did destroy the world with time travel," pointed out Rainbow Dash after an uncomfortable silence. "I mean, Chrysalis just tried to take over Equestria aaaaand I'll be quiet now."
Starlight turned her glare from Rainbow to Twilight.
"It's… different, with Chrysalis," said Twilight, fidgeting under Starlight's gaze. "She's a completely different kind of pony than you are. In fact, she's not a pony at all, she's a changeling. Telling her to stop trying to take over would be like telling a pegasus not to fly. The things she does are just… the way she is.
"And she doesn't mean it, not really. If she actually wanted to take over Equestria, she could have by now. She has, I will admit, gotten me to lower my guard enough that I wouldn't even see it coming. But she hasn't conquered Equestria. In fact, she almost goes out of her way to let me stop her. I don't think it really matters to her whether she wins or not, just that she makes the attempt. And I think as long as I'm around, she doesn't actually want to win. Because she knows how that would make me feel."
Twilight took a deep breath, looking levelly back at Starlight. "And I don't think you're that kind of pony. I think you truly want to be friends with everypony, that you want to move away from your past and become a different pony than you used to be. Am I wrong?"
Starlight sighed and closed her eyes. "No, Twilight, you aren't. And… I don't really want to take over Equestria anymore. Not seriously. Making all those plans, writing them down… it's just a way to get it out of my system. I do still feel the urge, every once in awhile, and that's how I deal with it."
"And that's good!" Twilight said encouragingly. "You can always come talk to me, too, if you need to. Just like Chrysalis can always count on me to foil her plans."
With a exasperated groan, Starlight threw up her hooves. "I give up. You really are in love with her, aren't you?"
"I'm almost sure I am," said Twilight meekly, a small smile on her face. "Maybe ninety-five percent sure?"
"I don't know what you see in her." Starlight shook her head slowly. "I certainly don't see it, that's for sure. But if you really want to go through with this… I won't stop you. I'd never stand in the way of happiness for one of my friends, even if I can't understand it. And if Chrysalis does end up living with us, I'll do my best to get along with her. Hopefully being actually married to you will mellow her out a bit."
Starlight leaned forward, pointing a hoof at Twilight. "But I'm telling you right now, I don't trust her. Just like you didn't trust Trixie... but at least she was reformed. And when this all blows up in your face and I have to rescue everyone, I'll definitely say I told you so."
"Duly noted," said Twilight with a smile, and Starlight gave a nod and sat back. But as she did, the smile slowly ran off Twilight's face, and she took to studying the table's surface again.
"Is Starlight right?" she asked after a moment, lifting her head to gaze around at her friends. "Is it a bad idea to stay with Chrysalis? She is dangerous, Starlight's right about that. And I can't seem to find that love inside me that I know is there, so maybe… would it be better to just let her stay away now that she's decided that's what she wants? Just chalk all this up to a big misunderstanding, something that might have worked out but ultimately didn't?"
"That would probably be a really bad idea," said Pinkie, speaking for the first time since the discussion had begun. All the ponies turned to her, blinking in surprise, but she didn't look up and just kept idly tracing circles on the table with one hoof. "I mean, just think of what Queen Chrysalis would do. We all know she loves you with all her heart, and with a changeling that can be an awful lot of love. You know, depending on her diet. But imagine what would happen if she was forced to keep all of that inside herself for years… maybe even decades. She won't just pretend you don't exist, Twilight. Oh, she says she doesn't want to contact you ever again, but you know she's going to be watching you just like she was before. Except even more so now, with how you'll probably be interacting with changelings on a daily basis as they become citizens of Equestria. You may not see her, but she'll see you in the hivemind every day. She'll start finding excuses to have changelings visit you, so she can glimpse just a few extra minutes of you in their memories. 'Why not me? What did I do wrong?' she'll ask herself, day in, day out. And that love in her heart, once so pure, will fester, turning into a black bile that chokes her every time she thinks of you. Eventually it will become hate, but she'll be so consumed by it at that point that she won't even notice, and finally she'll unleash her legions upon Equestria, crushing all resistance under her hoof and taking you by force. But at that point there won't be any love left. She'll try to love you, and she might think she does, but it will all be hate, a dark, bitter hate that she can't get rid of no matter how she tries, and the twisted mockery of a relationship she forces you to have with her will turn both your lives into an eternally suffering hell from which there will be no escape."
Twilight and her friends all wore the same expression—that of a pony who had been hit by a cart and was trying to figure out exactly what had happened and how they had come to be laying halfway down the street from where they had been standing a quarter of a second earlier.
"And things might actually end up even worse for everyone if she doesn't do that, Twilight. Because of you," continued Pinkie, not noticing any of this. "You know you love her, but you can't admit it, can't bring yourself to feel it. So in every relationship you have from now on, that will always be in the back of your mind. 'Do I love this pony as much as I love Chrysalis? What happens if I suddenly realize I do love Chrysalis?' It will poison every attempt you make at trying to love another pony, like a venom running through your heart. You'll grow bitter, blaming Chrysalis for your failures at forming meaningful relationships. Eventually you'll shut yourself away, refusing to even try forming those relationships at all on the off chance that you might suddenly decide to reject them for Chrysalis. And so you'll wait, alone in your castle, your love congealing in your heart until you can't feel anything at all anymore. And finally, after who knows how many interminable, dreary years, you'll give in. You'll go back to Chrysalis, claiming you love her, asking her to take you back. And she will, because she loves you so very much that she won't even notice your lies. Because they will be lies, won't they, Twilight? You won't love her at all. No, not after so long. Not after blaming her for the failure of every relationship you've ever tried to have. You'll be resentful, spiteful. Everything she does will be wrong, every imperfection in your lives will be her fault. She'll keep trying, though, dying of thirst and begging for even a drop of your love. And that will be your marriage. You, an icy, bitter matron, hating your wife with every fiber of your being even if you don't realize it. And Queen Chrysalis, reduced to a fawning sycophant, desperate for nothing more than a nice word from you, a kind touch. Just a smidgen of love that never, ever comes."
Done talking, Pinkie went silent again, still making circles with her hoof. She didn't notice her friends staring at her, which made sense seeing as they were all sitting in a shocked silence, their eyes wide and jaws hanging agape.
"Uh, wow, Pinkie, that's—" Twilight started to say, being the first to recover.
"What?" Pinkie looked up, blinking a few times. "Oh, hi, Twilight! Sorry, what did you just say? I was thinking about parties!"
"Um…" Twilight opened her mouth, raising a hoof, then sat back, shaking her head. "Just… wondering what you think about Chrysalis and I staying married? Or not being married?"
"Oh, you should definitely stay married!" said Pinkie, nodding her head energetically. "You two are just so adorable together! Plus, if you broke up…"
She trailed off for a moment, and everypony in the room held their breath. "If you broke up, everypony would be super duper sad!"
A gust of wind blew around the room, as the ponies in it started breathing again.
"So then, you like Chrysalis?" asked Twilight nervously.
"Oh, she's so much fun!" said Pinkie happily, bouncing up and down a few times in her chair. "She likes playing tricks just like me! She doesn't seem to like surprise parties very much, though… which is why I found this neat crepe paper that burns up really fast and clean, so next time we probably won't have to call the fire department! Plus I'll get extra balloons, since she likes to pop mine so much!"
The other ponies in the room looked at each other, and they all instantly and silently decided to pretend that Pinkie hadn't said anything before Twilight asked her what she thought.
"Well, there's still someone here I should talk to," said Twilight, smiling down at the dragon next to her, "but I think I already know what his opinion is."
"I do like Chrysalis," said Spike, almost shyly. "And all the changelings, too. They've all been really nice to me. And… it's been like having two moms."
Twilight blushed as her friends giggled, but then her face became serious.
"Two moms… I wonder... " she murmured thoughtfully. After a few moments her friends became restless, and she shook herself. "Sorry, I just had a thought. Chrysalis is always kind to her changelings—it, uh, may not always look like it, but long-term she really is. And since she's nice to Spike, too… she might see him as my changeling, my 'hive'."
"Well, that is kind of interestin', I guess," said Applejack with a shrug.
"No, don't you see?" Twilight said excitedly. "That's why she's always so mean to everyone! Well, okay, that's not right. It's why she's nice to the changelings, and to me and Spike. We're part of her hive, and everything she does is to keep the hive safe and happy. If you're not part of the hive… you're her enemy, or at least unworthy of consideration. After so many years alone, protecting her changelings, that must be the only way she can see things now. That doesn't really change anything, but at least it's a step towards understanding. Towards getting her to interacting more casually with ponies."
Twilight deflated slowly. "If, that is… I get her back. If I want to get her back."
"Twilight…" Starlight shook her head in frustrated puzzlement. "You just spent five minutes arguing with me that she's a perfectly harmless and sweet little bug who means the world to you. And now you're going on like you two have broken up for good and you don't ever want to see her again. I mean, I'm sorry, but make up your mind!"
"I'm trying!" cried Twilight desperately, flopping forward on the table. "But everytime I think I've figured out my feelings something else pops up and I start leaning the other way! It's just all so confusing that I can't figure out what I want!"
"Well," said Fluttershy timidly after a moment, "I know someone who's really good at figuring out things that don't make sense…"
"No!" Twilight's head snapped up "Don't say his name, don't even think—"
"Too late!" said Discord cheerfully, head snaking out from behind her throne. "Even an oblique reference is enough to get my attention."
He looked around the throne room, smiling widely. "Good to see everypony's here and doing well—Twilight!" he cried, suddenly noticing who it was he'd responded to after popping into the room. "It's really nice to see you here. And not stone anymore, either! Celestia figured out that whole mess much faster than I thought she would."
"I… what are you—"
"Whoops! Dear me, am I not where I thought I was?" He pulled out a pair of reading glasses to peer intently at a tattered, leather bound book in one hand. "Ah, yes, of course. You're the one who got married to the bug queen. See, look, I made a left at Amblequerque to get here, not a right."
"What are you—" Twilight followed Discord's finger to the page he'd held up in front of her face, then suddenly jerked back, her hooves going to her eyes "GAH! W-what is that?!"
"Oh, you act like you've never seen a hyper-multidimensional travel log before," complained Discord, with a roll of his eyes.
"I've never seen anything like that before!" She shuddered, her eyes still covered by her hooves. "What language was that? And the… pictures? Maps? I don't think those were even images! Ugh, it hurts my head just thinking about it! Not a headache, but the thoughts themselves hurt!"
"Oh, fine, I'll put it away." Discord tossed the book over his shoulder and it disappeared with a flash. "But someone's going to have to teach you how to travel on the quantum fractal highways and leap from manifolds to D-branes eventually, and if your little Sun Princess isn't going to do it I might as well."
"If it's going to be anything like that, then no thank you." Twilight sat up, rubbing her head and glaring at Discord. "Why are you here?"
"I was going to ask you that very same thing! I just heard you call and came to help." He stretched out on the table, cradling his head in his palms and fluttering his eyelashes at Twilight. "So, what can I do for you?"
"Nothing at all! In fact, we were just finishing up, so—"
"We've been talking about Twilight's marriage to Queen Chrysalis," said Fluttershy, making Twilight groan. "Twilight isn't sure if she loves Chrysalis or not, and Chrysalis is divorcing her now."
"Hmm…" Discord rubbed his chin with one hand, apparently actually giving the idea some serious thought. "That is tricky. Love can be quite chaotic, of course, but I can't actually say it's in my wheelhouse. So I might have to—"
He suddenly snapped his fingers, then looked at the frozen ponies surrounding the table. "Good, that should let us talk in privacy."
"What did you…" Twilight looked at her friends as well, and suddenly realized they were all standing as stiff as boards, not even breathing. "What did you do?!"
"Oh, I just stopped time for a moment, no big deal," Discord waved a hand. "Although we don't have much time—that is to say, our time—to talk."
"Why not?"
"Well, let's say you have an engine running at full throttle. And then you decided to hold the crankshaft still. It might be okay for a fraction of a second, but what would happen to it after… well, not very long at all?"
"It would… tear itself apart?" ventured Twilight worriedly.
"Yes, exactly! Now imagine that engine is time." Twilight gulped, and Discord nodded. "That's right. Also, this obviously doesn't work on alicorns, and Cay-Cay gets ever so upset if I do it for too long."
"Alright, fine, make all your jokes and let's get this over with, then," said Twilight, with a sigh.
"Jokes? Moi?" Discord put a hand to his chest. "Why, if I was going to joke, don't you think I'd have kept the audience?"
"Then what is all this about?!" snapped Twilight impatiently.
"I just want to tell you that you do love that deliciously twisted Queen, of course."
"I—" Twilight paused, blinking. "What?"
"Think for a moment, my precious little Princess of Books. In all the worlds, across all of time and space, what causes more chaos than love? It positively drips off you whenever the two of you are together. In fact, I can see it on any two ponies who are in love. I bet you didn't know this, but I'm almost as good of a matchmaker as Cadance."
He leaned in closer to Twilight, speaking in a low voice. "Don't tell her this, but I was actually up for the title of 'Princess of Love' back in the day. Turned it down, though. The tiara clashes with my beard."
He sat back. "And love aside, the sheer amount of chaos the two of you together would create would just be a positively delightful show! I mean, Equestria being peacefully invaded by an army of changelings, all trying to adapt to pony culture? And ponies, trying to coexist alongside a species that lives off their emotions? Why, the chaos that would create is second only to the potential for violence and bloodshed!"
"You—wait, what?!"
"Let me break this down for you," said Discord, his voice dropping to a menacing growl. Twilight gulped and shrank back in her seat as he loomed above her, his eyes now burning red embers.
"The love you and Queen Chrysalis share, the chaos that represents, is so great that it rivals even the most magnificent of my works. To not see you two together would be to go against the very fabric of my being. I want the two of you to be together, in happily married bliss, more than I ever wanted to bathe Equestria in chaos. To put it another way… I ship you so hard it bends reality."
"Um…" Twilight, shaking and sweating, glanced around. The room had grown dark and oppressive, and a heavy fog had begun rolling out of the shadows. Things lurked in the fog, things that at first appeared to be ponies but, the more she looked at them, the more they seemed to be shaped horribly wrong, twisted and bent in ways no living creature should ever be. Faintly, just at the edge of her hearing, she could hear whispers, promising her all the horrible things she lusted after in the far, dark corners of her heart, the things she'd never admitted even to herself that she wanted.
"And moreover," continued Discord, "I am, despite your objections, your friend. That means I want to see you happy. And you have no idea how happy Chrysalis would make you. I used the phrase 'happily married bliss' before, but that's only because I don't know any words stronger than bliss. That is what the two of you would share. Your marriage would become one of legend, heralded throughout the ages as the pinnacle to which two lovers can aspire. If you were to go through with your silly little divorce, I can guarantee you would feel regret later. But that would be only a simple pond, compared to the ocean of regret you would feel if you knew how wonderful and sweet your marriage would have been. Twilight, no matter what direction your life takes from this point on, I can promise you this: there is no future in which you will be happier than the future in which you stay married to Queen Chrysalis and finally get it through your little pony head how very, very much you love her."
"Are you...." Twilight blinked at him in stunned surprise. "Are you saying I do love her? And you think we'd be happy together?"
"Of course," Discord replied, his voice a sibilant hiss. "What does it sound like I'm saying?"
"Well, it's just, your eyes are glowing red, and the whole thing with the room and the darkness…"
"What?" Discord turned to look at his eyes in the wall mirror floating next to him. "Whoops!"
He turned around, waving his hands at the smoke and slowly dispersing it. "Sorry about that, it's been so long since I've done this. Had the thing still set to 'evil'. This was supposed to be fluffy pink clouds and cherub ponies with bows and arrows that had little hearts on the end!"
"Well, maybe if you ever actually came to a dress rehearsal…" said one of the shadowy figures over its shoulder, as it slowly exited with the fog.
"Oh, really Jerry, you're going to do this now?" Discord snorted in anger. "I thought you were supposed to be a professional. Look, all of you just head back to casting and find some cherub outfits. And put the eldritch horror stuff back in storage."
"Hmph. Calling me unprofessional…" muttered the figure, finally vanishing.
"Jerry's actually a really great guy," said Discord apologetically. "He's just been under a lot of stress lately, I guess his relationship with his girlfriend hasn't been going well… you know, I should do something nice for them, maybe take them out to dinner at a fancy restaurant…"
"I, uh…" Twilight scratched her head. "Can I just pretend none of that happened?"
"Probably for the best."
Discord walked across the table to sit on its edge next to Twilight. He reached out a paw and she tensed up, but he just put it gently on her shoulder.
"Look, Twilight," he said, voice earnest, "I could go on about how the two of you are a nexus of chaotic love like nothing I've ever seen and so on and so forth… but that wouldn't mean anything to you. So I'll just keep it simple.
"I've seen enough of both of you to know you love her. The two of you are good together. She did hurt your family, but I think you can get past that, to see her for who she really is, to see how much she cares for you. If you can forgive me for all the terrible things I've done, you should be able to do the same for her. Go to her. Love her. It's what you want in your heart."
"That's…" Twilight wiped a tear from her eye. "That was beautiful. Thank you, Discord."
"Yeah, well... " He stood up, walking away from her so she couldn't see his expression. "That's why I wanted to do it here, in private. I do have a reputation to uphold, you know."
"Oh, I'm well aware." Twilight snorted, then suddenly looked at him suspiciously. "So is it wrong that I'm actually even more confused now? I do want to love her, but the fact that you also want me to makes me think I should do the exact opposite. Sorry, but I still find it kind of hard to trust you."
"Oh, there's nothing wrong with that at all," said Discord quietly. Suddenly the room was black again. Discord's face shoved up against hers, his eyes blazing like two little windows into the fires of hell. "That just means you're learning."
He snapped his fingers, and the room was back to normal, sans one draconequus. Twilight looked around wildly, blinking, and her friends stared back at her.
"Are… you alright, Twilight?" asked Rainbow Dash, concern in her voice. "You kinda spaced out there."
"Wha… bu… Discord was just here, and… the shadows..." Twilight stammered, trying to put together a coherent explanation of what had just happened.
"Um, sorry, Twilight, but no he wasn't," Fluttershy said apologetically. "I invited him, but he said he had dinner plans. He did say he wished you luck, though. Um, and that Jerry did too? I'm not sure who that is…"
"Urgh, that annoying son of a bi—ahem." Twilight sat up straight for a moment, then slumped down again. She looked around the table, at each one of her friends in turn, then looked away and sighed.
"We weren't very much help, were we?" asked Fluttershy, ears drooping.
"No, no, you were! You girls all gave me a lot to think about. It's just... " Twilight let out another sigh, which turned into a groan. "I didn't need more to think about. I need to know what to do next. I was hoping you'd all agree, that I could use whatever consensus you came to as a guide. But instead, all I got were the same arguments I've been going over in my head for the last few days."
"Sorry, Twi, but you should have known it wouldn't be that simple," said Applejack, with a shake of her head. "I think that the fact we can't agree should tell you this is something you need to decide for yourself. You can't just count on us to give you an easy answer."
"Count on you? Easy answers? That's it!" Twilight beamed happily at her friends. "I trust all of you, so I can just have you vote, and whichever answer gets the most votes is what I'll do!"
"Wait…"
"Okay, who thinks I should stay married to Queen Chrysalis?"
Rainbow Dash, Spike and Pinkie Pie put their hooves (and a claw) in the air.
"I also vote for parties!" put in Pinkie Pie. "Parties and cake!"
"Noted," Twilight said, nodding gravely. "Now, who thinks we should separate?"
Starlight raised her hoof forcefully, and began waving it around.
"No!" said Applejack.
"Okay, so that's two for no—"
"I mean no, you can't do this, Twilight!"
"Wait, so is that a yes? You should have voted during the first round then, Applejack."
"Consarnit, stop pretendin' you don't know what I mean!" snapped Applejack, banging her hooves on the table. Twilight drew back, blinking, then slumped down with a guilty, sheepish expression on her face.
"I-it's just so hard…"
"I know it is, but that ain't no excuse for trying to cheat or take shortcuts." Applejack glared at Twilight for a moment, eyes narrowed. "You know, I'm just about ready to get our resident expert on love in here to sort you out once and for all."
"No!" Twilight jerked upright, a look of terror on her face. "I'll be good! Please, anything but that!"
"I don't know, she might set you right in order…" mused Applejack, a sly grin on her face.
"That's the opposite of what you want, Applejack, trust me," Twilight pleaded. "You're telling me I should decide for myself what I want, and you're right! But if she were here, I wouldn't be able to do that. You know exactly what she'd tell me to do, and she wouldn't take no for an answer. She'd say—"
"Oh Twiiiiiiiiliiiiiiiight, where aaaaaaaaare yoooooou?" Rarity's voice suddenly rang throughout the castle, and everypony around the table froze. "I know you're in here somewhere…"
"Run," said Twilight.
She and Starlight used their magic to grab up whatever loose furniture lay around the throne room, barricading the entrance. That done, Twilight quickly flapped her way up to one of the windows, pushing it open.
Rainbow Dash went first, quickly turning into a pale blue dot that vanished into the distance. Fluttershy followed behind her, though not nearly as fast, and then there was a flash as Starlight, with Spike on her back, teleported onto the sill next to Twilight. She hopped out into the air, magic wrapping around her body to guide herself gently to the ground, and then Twilight turned back to the room.
"Okay, you're first, Pinkie—" she started to say, only to realize the pink pony was nowhere to be found.
"First for what, Twilight?" said a voice from behind, and Twilight spun, blinking as she saw Pinkie sitting on the sill and regarding her with a questioning look.
"Um… first to… leave now that everyone who can fly is out of the way?" said Twilight hesitantly.
"Oh, okay! Bye!" With a cheerful wave, Pinkie jumped out the window, sliding down the steep side of the tree-shaped castle on her back. "Wheeeee!"
As the sound of her merriment faded into the distance, Twilight turned back to the last pony still in the room.
"Hold on, Applejack," she called, flapping her wings.
She'd hardly moved at all before jerking to a halt, as someone began to pound, hard, on the door to the throne room, shaking the hastily thrown together barricade.
"There's nowhere else you can be Twilight!" cried out the enraged Rarity. "So you let me in this instant!"
Twilight hesitated, eyes darting between Applejack and the door.
"Don't you dare, Twi!" yelled Applejack, just as an end table fell off the barricade and the door cracked open an inch.
"I'll tell everypony you died a hero!" called out Twilight over her shoulder, as she shot out the window.
"You lousy, no good, yellow-bellied—"
Applejack's ranting cut off as the doors burst open, scattering furniture across the room, and a fuming Rarity strode in.
"Oh, Rarity! W-what a surprise to see you…"
"Where is she?" growled the fashion pony, trotting forward.
"I don't know who you mean… oh, are you talking about Twilight?" Applejack let out a nervous laugh, studying the ceiling a desperate attempt to avoid Rarity's eyes. "You know, I just heard her talking the other day about, uh, wanting to… visit Sunburst! Yeah. You know, Starlight's old friend, also studies magic? They were meeting to discuss… uh, magic. So I think she's in the Crystal Empire right now!"
Rarity had stopped, blinking in surprise. Now, seeing Applejack's scrunched-up face, she chuckled and started forward again.
"Oh, Applejack, you should know better to try to lie. Especially to me. Now, come on… you're going to tell me everything."
Applejack gulped and tried to back away, but she had already been as far from the door as she could be when Rarity burst in. So all she could do was whimper and slide to the floor as Rarity advanced, a grim smile on her face.
The rest of the day was filled with a merry chase through Ponyville, Twilight managing to stay a hoofstep ahead of the meddling-intent Rarity for longer than she had thought possible. Rarity had finally caught her, but with both ponies exhausted from the chase all she'd been able to do was growl a few disapproving words at the Princess before both had trudged back to their homes.
But at night, things were different.
Nights always woke somber moods in ponies. Luna had often been asked if that was her intention, but an enigmatic smile was always the only response. Ponies that had been bright and cheerful during the day became thoughtful and solemn when the night fell and darkness overtook the land. Optimistic thoughts became pessimistic, and the worst outcomes always seemed the most likely.
So Twilight paced in her study by the light of candles. Occasionally she'd glance over at her desk, where the packet of papers from the palace sat waiting to be signed.
She had a choice to make, one that would affect not only her life, but the lives of those closest to her, and possibly the lives of everyone in Equestria. With a deep breath, she stopped her pacing, and tried to put everything into simple terms.
Queen Chrysalis loved her. And she loved Queen Chrysalis… except she couldn't seem to actually feel that love.
There was too much history between them, Chrysalis had done too much, pushed things too far. Twilight knew now that all of it—well, most of it—had been done out of love. It had all just been Chrysalis's way of expressing her love, and she thought Twilight had known that and had been going along with it. But Twilight hadn't, and it was too hard now for her to separate what she'd thought Chrysalis had been doing from what the Queen had actually been doing. She might understand it all intellectually, but her heart was another matter.
And despite all that, she still wanted to be friends with Chrysalis. She even wanted to love her, to return her deep, fierce affections. She'd tried to love the changeling, she'd tried her absolute best—she'd dated Chrysalis for months, gone to her friends and family for advice… but nothing has been able to break through that barrier. She still wasn't able to feel the slightest bit of love beyond what she felt for any of her friends.
Was she scared to? Was she just afraid of being in love? Or had everything Chrysalis done just been too much for her heart to forgive? Was her love lost forever because of a simple misunderstanding?
Maybe so. Chrysalis had certainly believed it to be true, and she had left. Partly because she had known the futility of continuing to try and draw love from what seemed to be an empty well… and partly out of her own love for Twilight, to free Twilight from any obligation to try loving her. To, as one final act of love, free the pony she loved to go and find her own love.
The worst part was… Chrysalis had been right. There was no point in pretending; Twilight could fake being in love, they could even have a real marriage and a real relationship like that. It wasn't like she didn't love Chrysalis, she was just hung up on a few issues. Surely with time, and enough love from Chrysalis…
But Pinkie's words had cut deeper than Twilight had thought. Now she could see another future, one where she and Chrysalis tried to pretend they both loved each other. It could work with anypony else in the world… but not with Chrysalis. Not with a changeling. No matter how they pretended, Chrysalis would know. And the longer things went on, the more they tried to lie to each other, the more bitter and angry Chrysalis would become. No, that path would only end in disaster.
So, if Twilight couldn't pretend to love Chrysalis, and if she couldn't actually love her…
...then Chrysalis had been right to leave. Maybe this was how it had to be.
Twilight slowly approached her desk. The papers sat on it, waiting. Sitting down in her chair, she began to leaf through the stack of forms. They all seemed fairly standard; initial here, sign this, put a date here, and that pony you're married to will be out of your life forever. There was a familiar pang of sadness at that thought, but thinking of Chrysalis at all now brought that feeling. Other than that… she didn't feel anything out of the ordinary.
So she began to fill out the paperwork. Initial here, sign this, put a date here… She worked slowly, methodically. She didn't want to mess this up, didn't want to draw things out. Finish it all here, end it cleanly. Just like Chrysalis wanted. There wasn't much Twilight could do for her anymore, but she could do this right. It would be her last gift to the Queen. That's why she held the quill in her hoof, rather than simply using her magic; this was personal.
Finally, Twilight came to the last page. There was one final signature, this one confirming that all of the above signatures were correct and that this truly was what the pony signing wanted. It was the last key that, when turned, would lock all of the chains in place. Signing this would remove Chrysalis from her life forever.
Twilight thought all of this, staring at that empty line waiting for her signature and felt… nothing different. Nothing that she hadn't felt before. So, with a steady hoof, she signed her name.
Then she sat back, staring at her signature, the quill still in her hoof. That was it. Chrysalis was gone now, for good. It was all there, on official palace documents and signed by her, a Princess. Now bound by the iron hand of law, she would never, ever, ever see Queen Chrysalis again. The words saying so were right there in front of her, in cold black ink. The harsh reality of what that really meant was laying on her desk, and that realization began to beat inside her head to the pulse of her heart.
Her hoof started to tremble.