Heroes come in all shapes and sizes. Though sometimes, they come in the form of a sociopathic CEO. Enter Handsome Jack. Bandit killer, head of the company that manufacturers the most accurate firearms ever made, and destroyer of the CL4P-TP steward bot line.

But, above all else: he's the most handsome king to ever rule over the Crystal Empire.

Follow the Handsome one as he attempts to purchase Canterlot from Princess Celestia! Will he succeed in doing so? Or will this be a story in which the hero doesn't emerge as the victor?

Edited by James Fire.

Reading by Winged T. Spears,

To be inserted into Equestria, it's a dream come true for anybrony!

Meet the ponies!

Have super awesome magical adventures!

Use foreknowledge to avoid all those silly pratfall moments without screwing things up and causing irreparable harm to the Mane 6...uh...hopefully!

And all for the low cost of possessing Princess Luna, denying her any real freedom or the ability to move on with her life since she's in your head and you're walking around as Nightmare Moon!

Yeah...there had to be a catch in there somewhere, didn't there?

Applejack breaks her hoof and is unable to buck apples for awhile, but that doesn't stop her from using her head. Literally.

Princess Celestia has been planning for this day for years: the return of Nightmare Moon, the restoration of the Elements of Harmony, and the ushering of Equestria into a new age of friendship and love. Now that it's finally arrived, all she has to do is wait for Twilight to get to Ponyville, make some friends, hunt down the Elements, and save the...

Wait, what'd that letter say?

She didn't get on the chariot?

She went to whose party instead?

Oh. Oh, this could be bad. And more importantly, it's gonna need some hooves-on interference from Celestia to get her master plan back on track. But it'll probably all work out in the end. After all, how big a deal could one party be?

Third-place finalist in Aragon's "Comedy (Is Serious Business)" contest

One does not simply blaspheme the princess's tits.

Consequences may include, but are not limited to, snuggling, court-martial, and third-degree burns. And not necessarily in that order.

Entry for the Comedy (Is Serious Business) contest.

The selected prompt was "We learned something hot."

This story is a sequel to That Changeling's a Pony!

Maxilla is an exiled changeling who resides in Baltimare and writes stories for a living. Life’s pretty normal and pony-like for her, until she’s visited by a very unusual fan who just won’t leave her alone.

Lyra is convinced that Ruby Pinch and Berry Punch are undercover supervillains, and she will do whatever it takes to expose the truth before it is too late.

Starlight Glimmer has learned many lessons over the course of her time as Princess Twilight Sparkle's student. The values and meaning of friendship, not to enslave a town and steal their cutie marks, and how to turn the shower on in the castle.

However, her greatest lesson has yet to be learned. And it shall come to her when she goes on a journey to purchase a can of soup.

Entry for The Comedy (Is Serious Business) Contest under the prompt: We Learned Something Archaic

Pre-read by King of Madness and Zendar.

Edited by James Fire

Cover art by HPBudgecraft,

They say she's the whitest unicorn that ever lived.

They say she carries a guitar case with her everywhere she goes.

They say if you cross her path, bad things will happen to you.

If you venture into the seedier parts of Old Mexicolt, you'll hear whispers and rumors in the shadows of dusty bars and dingy hotels.

Rumors about her...the one they call La Rariachi.

Not long after the events of Forgotten Friendship, Sunset Shimmer decides to go back to the beach that she and the girls met up at when they lost their memories of her, but this time at night, where no one could see her. She wanted to go by herself to do a little something to unwind: skinny dipping.

WARNING: Contains spoilers to the Forgotten Friendship special, Skinny Dipping, Stripping, and Nudity.