• Member Since 9th Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen May 5th, 2019




They say she's the whitest unicorn that ever lived.

They say she carries a guitar case with her everywhere she goes.

They say if you cross her path, bad things will happen to you.

If you venture into the seedier parts of Old Mexicolt, you'll hear whispers and rumors in the shadows of dusty bars and dingy hotels.

Rumors about her...the one they call La Rariachi.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 35 )
Wanderer D

Moth. Moth, what are you doing to my culture.

...Your mind goes weird places, and I respect that.

The same thing I do to my own and everyone else's. Mercilessly skewer it with parody, humor, and wit. :pinkiehappy::raritywink:

I remember this movie.

... So who gets to be the one with a rocket launcher disguised as a guitar case? Pinkie?

Also, is it bad that I thought of Quick Draw McGraw before anything else?

Ironically, that's where this STARTED--me picturing Rarity as El Kabong. And then my mind veered into this tangent, and I had to write it.

Best damn $7,000 movie I've ever seen. Yes, it cost Robert Rodriguez less than you'd pay for a quality used automobile these days to make El Mariachi, and I'm excited to read Moth's take on it.

... What the fuck did I just read?

Never seen any of the El Mariachi movies by Robert Rodriguez, I take it?


Can't say I've ever heard of either of those, no.

Never saw the movie but I love Rarity so...yeah favorited.

:pinkiegasp: Wow. You...need to do something about that, pronto. (Or maybe not. I mean, Robert Rodriguez is basically Mexican Quentin Tarantino. If you like Tarantino, you'll love Rodriguez. If you can't handle Tarantino, you're better off not bothering.)

Recommended viewing:
El Mariachi
Once Upon A Time In Mexico
(These three are the El Mariachi Trilogy)
From Dusk Till Dawn


Don't think I've seen any Tarantino movies.

:pinkiegasp: Not even Pulp Fiction?!


No. All I know about it is the memetic "English motherfucker, do you speak it?!" scene, which I've seen, but I've yet to actually see that. And yet I willing went to see and enjoyed Pixels...

A portly, middle-aged burro with a thick black mustache stood behind the bar, wiping a grimy patch of filth with a grimy rag.

This made the patch less filthy without impacting its overall grime levels. How this was possible is a mystery best left to bartenders.

I'm afraid I'm unfamiliar with half of the crossover, and Pinkie could definitely take "Pony with No Name" pointers from Cheese Sandwich, but this was still a fun read. Guitarity presents some truly glorious story opportunities.


Robert Rodriguez also made the Spy Kids movies, the first two of which were pretty great, then the 3rd one sucked, then he waited like 7 years before making another one, which also sucked.

I like it. an MLP version of DESPERADO. and Rarity is a lovely (equine)
Antonio Banderas. very cute.

So should we ask what's in the guitar case?

The biggest funny horn cannon you ever funning saw.

You know, if there is an apocalypse, I'm sure there are worse ways to go than being metal'd to death by best pony.

quote-unquote Eeyup.


Piso Mojado

:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh: Now I know why they call us wetbacks! :rainbowlaugh: All that's left is for us to wake up hungover!

Yes.... so much yyeess!!!!.....

Um..... Rarity knows how to do a sex change spell? Oh to hell this was awesome, and the best tribute ever to The Maricachy.

Rarity: Soy una pony muy honrada,que le gusta lo mejor, los vestidos no me faltan niel dinero ni el amor. Jineteando como caballo, por la sierra yo me voy, Luna y sus estrellas, ellas me dicen donde voy!

I don't know what's going on, but I have a feeling I should watch El Mariachi sometime soon.

Actually, the movie you NEED to watch is Desperado. El Mariachi is a great film, but it's harder to track down, in Spanish, and the important bits of the story are retold in a flashback sequence in the more well-known sequel, Desperado, in which Antonio Banderas takes over the role of El Mariachi.

The trilogy is as follows:
El Mariachi (filmed on a shoestring budget, in Spanish)
Desperado (has big-name stars, is in English, and has major collaboration from Quentin Tarantino)
Once Upon A Time In Mexico (Less well-known, mixed reviews, tosses Johnny Depp into the cast)

Harder to track down? Maybe, but it's on Amazon Video (really not my favorite way to watch movies, but usable). The hard part is finding the time to sit down and enjoy a movie properly.

Wow this story was just wow.
I had to do breathing exercises to calm down from laughing to much. Lucky i am home alone.
5/5 story.

Great story! And I can see Rarity doing that! :raritywink:

(Now I'm imaging a meeting between El Rariachi and Mafia Octavia...)

I hope to see this continued (it is marked as incomplete...)

Comment posted by superfun deleted Aug 2nd, 2018

Good story but need a update

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