An alarm sounds. There's a planet nearby. I wonder if anyone can hear me.

When the Royal Wedding scatters defeated changelings all over Equestria, a member of the hive winds up being captured in Ponyville, tied up, stunned, repeatedly shot by a cannon, and held against his will.

The truly frightening part is he’s starting to like it.

Thank you to my twisted editors: Tek, Seether00, GameKnut, Cerulean Blue and Peter
The picture Pinkie Pie uses Party Canon is from Atmospark at DeviantArt

This story is listed as comedy⁽*⁾ because the author has an odd sense of humor. No changelings were harmed⁽¹⁾ during the production of this story, despite what the newspapers printed or the ongoing lawsuit from the ESPCA⁽²⁾. The management would like to remind all readers to spay and neuter your pets. Unless your pet is a changeling, in which case…

(*) Dark humor, to be exact. If you are someone who finds pleasure in the misfortune of others, enjoys watching the occasional inept chainsaw juggler or cheers during a NASCAR crash, welcome home. Also, get help.

(1) Excluding blunt trauma, thermal impingement, chemical exposure, radiation, thaumaturgic infusions, and confetti ingestion. All characters represented, including changelings, are the exclusive property of Hasbro, no matter what they may shout at you from between the bars of their cell. Any violence or pain inflicted on the changeling in this story was simulated on a stunt changeling with special effects and mirrors. Except for the cannon. There is no truth to the rumor that Queen Chrysalis provided the stunt changelings from a supply of disobedient changelings in her dungeon⁽³⁾.

(2) Equestrian Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Arthropods

(3) The Changeling Kingdom does not have dungeons. They have Call Centers. It explains a lot, actually.

Here is a link to some appropriate background music to listen to while reading: Piotr Tchaikovneigh’s 1812 Overture

Additional Note: This story is tagged Sex because it has the occasional reference to… well, sex. There are no explicit references, but there are things.

After Rainbow Dash accidentally says the wrong two words to exactly the wrong unicorn, she learns a lesson about the power of language -- in more than one way.

(Part of the Triptych Continuum, which has its own TVTropes page and FIMFiction group. New members and trope edits welcome.)

Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages.

You know what would be funny? Robbing a bank. Pinkie's pretty sure of that.

Not like the others have a say in the matter anyway.

Proofread by: Octavia Harmony, Neko Majin C, The Maskedferret, and Abcron.

Special thanks to Selbi and Lucky Roll.

[Complete! With TVTropes apparently!]
Also, apparently, an animated trailer.

In a world of brass and steam, Twilight Sparkle had thought she had made a life-changing discovery with the invention of the telescope. For better or worse, she was correct.

Now her discovery has not only changed her life, but the lives of those she seeks out in her desperate attempt to contact the only other creature as lonely as Twilight herself.

It all would have been much simpler, but it had to be the one Twilight could only call The Mare on the Moon.

Decidedly not within walking distance, then.

[Featured on EQD before story was meant to be submitted. 4/03/2015]

[Editing team: Southpaw, Wolfvenom, Maskedferret, SwanSong and BluePaladin42, without whom this story would be a fraction of its current state.]
[Special thanks to Novel-Idea for the updated cover]

This story is a sequel to The Sun Burns Brightly

When you're the immortal ruler of an entire kingdom, the most important quality to possess is a passion for your work. No princess can rule her nation if she can't find it in herself to give her best effort every day and night. Luna knows this better than anypony, and puts her whole heart into everything she does.

But passion, unless tempered by restraint, has a way of biting one in the flank.

Twilight and her friends are approached by Princess Luna who presents them with a set of questions that trigger a long and perilous journey.

Did you ever stop to wonder what became of Trixie, Gilda and Blueblood after your encounters? What did these episodes truly mean to you? What role will they yet play in the lives of the Elements of Harmony?

Last, are these questions as relevant as the journey towards the answers? Who will benefit from seeking these answers - you, them, or I?

This story is a sequel to The Moon Glows Gently

When you're the immortal ruler of an entire kingdom, the most important quality to possess is self-control. No princess can rule her nation if her emotions rule her. Celestia knows this better than anypony, and mastered them long ago.

So long ago, she may have forgotten that a little bit of passion can come in handy now and again.

Wake up. Go to work. Save Ponyville from unimaginable horrors beyond time and space. Have lunch with your PFF.

Ditzy Doo lives in a different world than her fellow ponies. She sees things nopony else can see—like higher-dimensional spatial anomalies, fae creatures, and eldritch abominations. And she uses what she sees to solve problems that nopony else even knows about.

But this time, Ditzy may have bitten off more than she can chew. Something very unfriendly is trying to enter Equestria through Ponyville’s Town Hall. An earth pony with an hourglass cutie mark has taken an unhelpful interest in Ditzy. The Princess’s personal student has grown suspicious. And, most irritating of all, her alarm clock radio is acting strangely.

Ditzy must race against the clock to save Ponyville—a clock that keeps playing the same song over, and over, and over ...

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Traducción al español por SPANIARD KIWI aquí.
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Many thanks to everyone who preread and edited my WORDS WORDS WORDS:

Japanese Teeth
Sessalisk
Sereg
Kuroi Tsubasa Tenshi
CDRW
Clever Pun
Connelly
Justanotherbrony

Cover art assembled by yours truly, using a Derpy vector by Sierraex.

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Shoop boopy boop boop doop bedoop.

Daring Do seeks a favor from her sister in Ponyville. Due to buried grudges, things quickly get out of hoof. She soon finds herself on her most perilous mission yet... with her biggest fan in the world. In the midst of truth and lies, loyalty and treachery, love and hate, one thing is clear ― some family situations are stranger than fiction.

The story extends in Through the Looking-glass and What Pinkie Found There and The Daughter Doo: Honorary Cutie Mark Crusader.

Many thanks to Honey Mead and statoose for their watchful and helpful pre-reading.

Ckat_Myla and statoose (CatNStat) have started an excellent reading of TSD.