Set in the Optimalverse, a middle-aged woman enamored of 'Equestria Online' confronts what permanent emigration to Equestria - uploading to a virtual existence - really means... but can she even hope to truly understand such a thing - and more importantly, can she trust the artificial intelligence known as 'Celestia'?

♥ As Horrified Eliezer Yudkowsky!

Rainbow Dash writes a novel and challenges Twilight to proofread it. Twilight accepts the challenge and gets to work. Unfortunately, Twilight is met with a piece of literature so terrible, that she can't even find the heart to tell Rainbow Dash how terrible it is. What will be the outcome of this short adventure?

Please note that the comedy in this story is a bit bland, due to the fact that it wasn't supposed to be a comedy when I first began writing (I know right?). This is just a stupid idea I had one night. It's one of those one-shot stories. Make it happen, people!

The first time we danced, she broke my jaw in three places.

The life of a disposable minion in the service to the Dread Ahuizotl is filled with acts of senseless violence and hardship, normally ending in a hospital or unmarked grave, but for Disposable Minion #3, the job just got more interesting.

He fell in love.

And love hurts.

Credits to the amazing Luvlessi for the cover art
Background music: The Masochism Tango by Tom Lehrer
With a wonderful reading by Luvlessi
And a second reading by Crafty Reads
Featured on Equestria Daily

After years of trying, Scootaloo finally discovers her special talent.
It's the worst thing that ever happened to her. She'll have to leave Rainbow Dash and all her friends behind as she's forced to go off and learn about her new talent... and then it gets worse.

The sequel, Choices Legacy, is now available.

As always, I adore getting comments about the story; the more specific and prolific the better -- negative comments included. Your comments help make my future stories better.
Featured on Equestria Daily.

Many thanks to my team. I couldn't have done it without them.
Pre-readers:
MailboxBomber
Kyaksa
tosety
IceBeerG

Dialog Consultants:
Jacob Ellinger
kidmurkury
markey58

Editors:
IRpony

Proofreaders:
OkemosBrony
Unimpressive Vagaries

Artwork:
Scootaloo Vector by MoongazePonies
Background and cutie mark by author
In-Chapter art by author

When Twilight Sparkle slipped beneath the covers last night, everything had been fine. She had friends whom she loved, a teacher she adored, and a bright future ahead of her. But when she woke up, her blankets and quilts had been replaced by hospital gowns and padded restraints.

Everything is wrong and nothing makes sense; even her friends have changed. The doctors keep telling her that she is sick, that none of it was real and that it was all in her head. Yet she remembers a life far beyond the hospital walls. She couldn't have made it all up on her own. They must be lying… right?

Ask Asylum Twilight - Still updating regularly!
Equestria Daily
TVTropes
Asylum Fan Group
The Tartarus Project
Russian Translation
The Asylum 20,000 View Spectacular Stage Show!

Art:
Asylum Cover by conicer
Twilight and Twilight Smiles by dreamingnoctis
Mirror Twilight and Plague Doctor by Jaestring / BloodGoldWings
Twilight Smiles and Doctor AJ by conicer
Nurse Ratchet and Silas and What's in the mirror? by Archonix
Doctor AJ Sketch by Archonix | Colored and vectored version by ReFro82
Twilight's Asylum by Khan the Cake Lover
Smilight by HappySwitch
Twilight Waking Up by Dombrus
Fan Art by toxicdemon10
Asylum Twilight by Madness-With-Reason
Asylum Fluttershy and Asylum Ch 26 by Downburst-Backspace
Twilight and her Twin by v747
Birdgirl by sirValter

Readings and Videos:
Asylum Animated Trailer Video by formuladash
Reading by Gammarobot (SugarCubeRadio): All Chapters Here
Reading by Ender Brony: All Chapters Here
Reading by VisualPony: All Chapters Here
Reading by MelancholyIguana: All Chapters Here
Fan Trailer by Kaidan: Asylum FanFic Trailer Cuckoo's Nest

Sanctuary by Kaidan
Broadhoof Files: Dr. Humors by TypewriterError
Broadhoof Files: Corporal Phalanx Spear (Ret.) by Phalanx Spear
A Hearth's Warming Tragedy by Seven Fates

A special thanks to Breath of Plagues, Rex Ivan,
ChudoJogurt, Cynewulf, Death the Kid, Selbi, PrinceDolph, Blahman2816, Queue, and Gage!

Axan Zenith - Dr. Dreamer
Dratini4 - Way Finder
psychicscubadiver - Bright Mind
Velkaden - Dream Chaser
Reese - Silver Glow
Viola Heartstrings - Clover
Archonix - Spinney Whiteacre

Ahuizotl has the last of the Rings of Scorchero. Will the adventurer and hero Daring Do manage to stop him in time?

Quick answer: Nope

Okay, I don't know if anyone can hear this, or read this, or whatever, but I'm trying my best to use Pinkie Pie's legendary fourth-wall-breaking powers to try and get a message out.

If you can hear this, I need help. I'm in Equestria, and man, this is strange. But I'm also stuck in Pinkie Pie's body, for some reason.

Yes, it's just as weird as it sounds. And now, I need your help... because all the ponies in this town think I'm crazy!

This story is a sequel to Daring DONE!

The princesses need to take a week off to argue about important issues.

Luckily, Twilight is there to rule Equestria while they're gone!

There's absolutely no way this can go wrong.

As it's a sequel to "Daring DONE!", Twilight Velvet is the writer of the Daring Do saga and our favorite Indiana Jones homage is still a fictional character. That's what the AU tag is about!
(yay featured)

Special thanks to my prereaders and proofreaders:

• Selbi
• DaRandomPony
• Chivalry
• PheerthaniteX
• Chaotic Note
• MissingLink
• Super Trampoline
• Outcast4Ever
• Abcron
• Bookworm S

I hope I'm not forgetting anyone here...

Audio reading courtesy of TheArchitect
Audio reading courtesy of joehighlord

Pinkie Pie has an existential crisis while painting her room. This self-parody is dedicated to Professor Piggy, who once told me that I could write a story about Pinkie watching paint dry and weave it into an incredible psychological journey. Let's see if he was right.

Featured on Equestria Daily.

Dramatic reading by MicTheMicrophoneZero.

Cover art by chaosdrop.

Dear Princess Celestia,

I'm sorry I haven't written in a while. Things seem to be falling through the cracks lately. Spike thinks I should go see the doctor, but...