• Member Since 21st Feb, 2013
  • offline last seen Aug 17th, 2018

Mudkipman98


I'm a passionate brony throwing some words at you all, hoping to give you a good time. My hobbies are reading, cramming at the last minute, and gaming. Come watch! http://www.twitch.tv/mudkipman98

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Source

The final battle between Sora and Xehanort was a failure. Sora is on his last legs and his friends have all been captured. When he refuses to help Xehanort, he is sent into darkness. What he finds on the other side surprises him above all else.
SORA IS NOT A PONY!

Keyblade images provided by Xelim on deviantart. Here is the link to his profile page.
http://xelim.deviantart.com/
The keyblades can be found in his gallery under the 'keyblades' section on the left panel.

Also, feedback is always appreciated, especially if it's constructive criticism. If you leave a downvote, please tell me what I screwed up on so I can fix it. :pinkiesmile:

EDIT: Holy crap! Featured?! Thank you so much guys! (1/14/15)

Chapters (20)
Comments ( 212 )

Kinda short for just one chapter, dont you think?
:facehoof:

2445246
Yeah, but I needed to put in some actual MLP content so that the story could be initially approved.

I think it will be more difficult than beating a Purifier Warmech with nothing more than your bare hands/hoofs. Just so you know Fluttershy. :raritywink:
solaris7.com/files/members/4898/Purifier.jpg

Last line was the best :rainbowwild: *giggles*. MOAR! :flutterrage:

The premise of this story is great, but you spend too much time eplaing the story instead of telling it. I think you should rewrite this using the first person perspective to tell the story (IE telling the story from one of the characters perspectives. You can even switch between characters to tell different parts of the plot.) use internal monologue to illuminate past events and remember that with a story like this you don't really need to explain the set up as your audience will have played the games. If you do need to explain anything do it at the end of the fic in an authors note so that it doesn't interrupt the flow of the story. Again I like the premise but to do the story justice it needs to be told not explained.

It was good, but you seem to be skipping forward a lot.

Looking good..... Like and fave! :yay:

2446634
I see what you mean. The reason I threw in the past of the games is because I personally know a few people who haven't played all of the games. It was there mainly for those who needed the rest of the information and build up to where the KH plot is so far. Also, I understand what you mean about telling it and not explaining it, but I'm having a hard time doing that with a third person story. I'm not too good with first person, and the plot revolves around many characters, not just a few, so I thought it would be better to go with third person this time around. Thanks for the feedback though. It always helps. :twilightsmile:

Can it be?!
A fic where sora is not a pony?! :pinkiegasp:
HUZZAH! :yay:
Please don't let me down! :rainbowkiss:

-Kiryu :moustache:

2447434

You're welcome. I'll definitely check out your other stuff.You know they say practice makes perfect so keep at.

Pretty good, only one problem: Kiari isn't a keyblade wielder. When riku gave her the "Destinies Embrace" keyblade he was using the same ability that lets sora summon two keyblades while in valor, master, or final form. the second keyblade can be used by other and non keyblade wielders for a short amount of time.

a prime example would be riku using roxas' Oblivion.

other than that pretty good so far :twilightsmile:

2449110 technically Dream Drop Distance happened

2449110
Ah. Good to know. It still fits into the story though, her being captured by Xehanort and all, because originally, the X-Blade was forged using the 7 princesses of heart as the 7 pieces of light. It's fair to say that Xehanort could've used Kairi to replace the missing slot for the keyblade wielders. Continuity remains! :rainbowdetermined2:

I am looking forward to this

This fic can turn out really good, Though, I suggest not having image dumps in here. Chances are that if you have not played any KH game you would not be super interested in this fic and even if you were a writen description of the object/character in question would be enough. (If people really want to see what it looks like there is always google.)

The reason I say this is that it very much so breaks the flow to have to scroll past images to keep reading!

I'd also like to see more detail description of what is going on in the future chapters to make it easier to follow. :P

KH 1.5 HD is the next game. It will be on PS3 and have 1, 2 and 358/2 days.

FINALLY!

A GOOD KH crossover.

2449110 What do you mean, Kairi's not a Keyblade wielder? Did you not see the secret ending of KH3D? Of course she's a wielder! If she weren't, then that Keyblade Riku gave her would have gone straight back to him instead of let itself continue to be wielded by Kairi. Even before Riku obtained the "Way to the Dawn" Keyblade, he didn't just stop being capable of wielding a Keyblade altogether; it's just that the Keyblade that was supposed to be his didn't feel like being his Keyblade anymore when Sora proved he was a better wielder than him.

The reason Kairi can use a Keyblade at all is because she touched Aqua's Keyblade as a little girl in BbS. Aqua was an acknowledged Keyblade Master at the time, meaning she performed the Keyblade Inheritance Ceremony on Kairi much like Terra did with Riku, except completely by accident with no fancy speeches or anything. Perhaps the point of the secret ending was to imply she doesn't have the power to summon a Keyblade of her own and has to learn how, like Lea did.

2450676 well no, I haven't seen the secret ending, hell I haven't beaten the game yet!

What I said in the comment was what I got from The Keyhole (KH wiki), however that was before 3D was finished so the page may have been updated.

Also never played BbS...

2451416 An important lesson to learn on using outdated information. If it will help, watch this video and you'll be all caught up. I hope you have a half an hour to spare and/or don't mind massive spoilers.

Hmmmm...... On the whole, I'm intrigued by a KH/MLP crossover. It seems very plausible, given the way KH games are and that traveling to other worlds are a large part of the game.

Unfortunately... This didn't really do it for me.... Short, confusing, and, on the whole, rather hastily written (Kinda have the same problem myself, which is why I'm redoing my own story) I see the potential in it, I really do, but I feel that it needs a bit more polish. The recap chapter, was a little bit more complicated than it needed to be. the pictures didn't really help, in my opinion. Descriptions of the characters and setting would go a long way towards cleaning up the story.

Now, before my profile gets over run with negative comments and such, I'm not trying to be an asshat and degrade you in anyway. Just pointing out things that, to me, were things that could be done better.

2453946
I see what you're saying. I used the pictures because I didn't trust myself with accurate descriptions of the characters or their keyblades. At least, descriptions that would give readers the exact look of the characters. I'm having a heard time trying to write in more detail for length, especially since it isn't always needed for fans of the show or games who already know the areas well without description. Thanks for your feedback. :twilightsmile:

I find my self at a bit of an impasse with this story. I want to like it, I really do, but the writing style is a little choppy, and I feel as if it's rushed a bit. I'll stick with it if you, the author, can convince me. I know I must sound like a douche right now, but I'm just undecided on this one.

Besides, listing reasons why people would like this story would most likely help your own understanding of what to write in for later chapters.

2469840
That's an issue that I have with some of my other stories. I think I get a bit anxious to see the next event my self, so I go ahead and put the next event without much detail. It's a habit I'm trying to get out of, and I think I'm almost there.

2469840
and no, you're not a douche. All feedback I get, be it positive or negative, is good feedback because it helps me grow as a writer. :twilightsmile:

wait how does fluttershy handle the keyblade only the chosen ones can use it so unless shes a keyblad warrior it should not be possible

2491784
there is a video in the comments below that explains how non keyblade wielders can use/wield a keyblade of their own. If you don't feel like watching a 30 minute video, then just look up "keyblade inheritance ceremony".

I am automatically hooked. You must include one more important, crucial, KH2 element in this before I go freaking out:
Anti-Form kicking some serious flank.
Maybe 1000 Heartless Event...?
You must do this for me ( I mean us.)
You Must.
YOU MUST!!

I'll go along with this. It was rather funny since Twilight got hit in the head by Sora. :rainbowlaugh:
But try to keep the story flow.

Awesome story happy to see it updated.
as dor the drive forms, i thought that using a party member was more a gameplay mechanic.
This to prevent abuse just like anti-form.
The form change it self is just sora self (story-wise) i think, just like story wise anti-form exist because sora went heartless.

Aye, that wasn't supposed to happen!

2527646
Is that good or bad? X)

2449415
Just to get facts straight: if you wathced the secret movie from KH3D, it is made known that Kairi does in fact have the ability to wield the Keyblade.

2545064
Yeah, I'm a tad bit embarrassed by that comment. I watched the secret movie after posting the comment, and my initial belief was confirmed.

So am I right to assume that my keyblades are going to make an appearence next chapter? :ajsmug:

2577257
Yep! It'll soon be out. :rainbowdetermined2:

Celestia stared in wonder at the two keyblades. They were definitely unique, and wherever the design for them had come from, the universe certainly did an excellent job. ;)

Oh narration, you flatter me! :pinkiesmile:

Boy oh boy, I certainly didn't see where that was going. Please update soon, I want to find out what happens.

Roxas just appears and is like "Yo what's up?"
Then he beats the crap out of a massive heartless and disappears.

2586715
And that's Roxas for ya! :rainbowdetermined2:

Nice to see that red eyes (or hunter of the dark, whatever you prefer) is more than just a random enemy that is beaten quickly, I personally would have hated that. It is easily the most powerful heartless in the series (except maybe world of chaos).

2591176 I agree that thing was hard! Especially on critical mode and expert mode.

heh, heh, didn't expect Twilight to be beaten to a (metaphorical) pulp, nice touch. :rainbowlaugh: Will they be defeating the Hunter of the Dark permanently in one of the future chapters? :twilightoops:

Sora... I WANT TO GET HUGGED BY TWILIGHT TOO!!! :flutterrage:

2579950 you did awesome on the key blades if i ever do kingdom hearts crossover i'll use a your awesome keyblades

good start for the story the first world is completed

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