The strange and delightful romance of Rarity and Spike, as told in the style of a Wes Anderson film. A pretentious love story with lots of shots of ponies staring out windows in the rain.
Written for LtMajorDude for Jinglemas 2023
Given prompt: Spike and Rarity. SPARITY! Spike has to be aged. A massage has to be present. Any race is allowed (original pony/dragon or human or anthro).
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Well last night you posted some Sparity
I said "It better not be pornography"
But if it is
All right
I'll read it on the train tonight
Be-di-be-di bom bom, to Appaloosa
Last traaaaaiiiiinnn to Appeloosa
Last trai-haaaiiiinnnn to Appeloosa
'Cause if you miss
This one
You'll never git another one...
[EDIT: oh, you know...]
"CURSED ARTIFACT: do not invoke except by order of Celestia"
11781759
No
Oh my god.
I'm not a film buff. Movies just aren't really my thing -- I watch them for entertainment rather than artistic appreciation. But I do like reading and I think I have some capability when it comes to understanding stories, so inhaling this story about a fictional auteur director through the framework of older mares, dragons and coming to grip with what we really want from life after we hit the halfway point was moving and melancholic in a way that movies just don't quite manage for me.
I loved the Rainbow Dash scenes. I know they weren't the focus of the story, but there was a lot of emotional resonance in there. Perhaps it's easier to relate to her situation than that of an actor and a director.
A great job, as always. I would normally put an exclamation point on the end of the previous sentence, but I don't think this story wants that sort of exuberance.
11781925
Let the cringe flow through you!
Wes Anderson.
Never watched any of his films. I thought about Fantastic Mr Fox and Isle of Dogs, but never got the chance or opportunity to watch them. But he had some weird style of filming and I can kinda see that in this story.
And oh boy, I can't believe YOU actually got my prompt. The very same person who wrote Would It Matter Of I Was (I would later make a propane parody story of that story, which I won't link because I kinda regret it now).
Definitely an interesting read and appreciated some references (of course the words Like Fine Wine brought back happy memories and recalling of old cheese) and was interesting to see the massage part done differently than I expected. This isn't the first time I've asked for this prompt and instead of Spike massaging Rarity, it's Rarity being massaged by someone else while she badmouths Spike. Of course she ends up regretting that and the story implies that part was over exaggerated.
A bit mixed on the Rainbow parts and the second last chapter. Rainbow ain't exactly my favorite Mane 6 character (nor do I like her badmouthing her mother like in the beginning.) Also, yikes, Spike and Rarity are just friends despite their interactions? Anyway, the Rainbow parts were still a nice touch (and the end implies a reconciliation between them) and the Spike and Rarity last part can be seen as part of the humor part of the story and, heck, a Wes Anderson thing.
Shakes called this Jinglemas the one with the most participants so far, and despite him being an incest loving S.O.B., I was glad to be a part of this exchange and got this interesting story in the end. (Still love you Shakes. <3)
TLDR
Thank you for the story, mate! Heck I may have to get a glass of whiskey to celebrate this Christmas Eve day.
Merry Christmas! Happy birthday Jesus!
11781925
TOM: Well that's just silly--she's not even in the original packaging!
CROW: Yeah, bubble wrap is a whole 'nother fetish.
JOEL: Guys, keep it PG or I'll have to put you in storage.
TOM, CROW: NO--NOT THE PLASTIC PEANUTS!
That was how Life of Brian got made. George Harrison read the script, laughed his ass off, realized no sane studio would touch it, and bankrolled it himself.
Man, what a strange prompt. Kudos to you for working with it. It wasn't until last year that I got anything more than a request for on or two specific characters, but that one basically spelled out how the whole plot was to go. I didn't even know that was allowed. I did the best I could with it, but I was just never very into it. So this year I explicitly asked not to be given any plot prompts. Still kinda got one, and in a way that's difficult to work with canon. Two days left to make it work...
11782106
Yeah, I spent a long time thinking of how to deal with this prompt. I don't like Sparity as a ship in the canon universe because it has creepy/groomer implications, and if I'm going to do an AU where they're the same age, it feels like I'm not shipping them at all -- just giving two new characters their names. I thought this threaded that needle pretty well.
Good luck with your story, and let me know if you want to bounce ideas off me or have me do a pre-read. :)
Bold of you to use the fandom's collective core memory comic as cover image ;)
Can't wait to read this!
You capture the Wes vibe so nicely, down to every character sounding exactly like Wes Anderson. The dialogue funnels into the last line of this chapter oh so very nicely.
I am curious to know if Rarity's take on Calico Road shares any similarities to your take on Like Fine Wine. The comic has always fascinated me as an exploration of Rarity's character, and imo there's a lot of potential parallels to be drawn between the two.
11784200
I'll give you a hint, in the next chapter you see that the first movie she and spike make together is called Like Fine Wine.
I'm not ripping off the classics, it's an homage!
Alright this is the chapter that has now solidly hooked me. It just has the je nais se qois
This has a vibe, and I quite like it, and I want to express that more eloquently but when one is in an airport bathroom half formed thoughts to convey still forming feelings will have to do, good job
*schwing*
This is brilliantly done and I love it.
11786251
You're so good to me.
11786905
I'm glad you liked it! Thank you! :D
This IS one of the more interesting horsewords stories I've read that came out this season, or maybe this year. I mean, imho. I mostly liked it, and I liked most of it a LOT. But even things that I wasn't sure I liked sure made me think.
I was so distracted thinking about the story, and reading it a second time, I forgot to post...
Recommended! 👍
No one seems to have mentioned yet that in this version of Rarity you have created a character who is interesting, virtuous and triumphant, without being particularly likeable. That's not easy to do and you do it well and cleverly and without drawing attention to your cleverness.
11787022
Yeee, thank yoooou. :D
You know I enjoy your remarks. Every comment like this warms my day.
11787411
Fans of my work will know that unlikeable protagonists are my speciality!
Jokes aside, I wouldn't say she's supposed to be unlikeable or abrasive, just as you put it "not particularly likeable". She isn't there to charm you. She's got her own thing going on.
Thanks to this fanfic, I am now standing on the rim of Meteor Crater, Arizona.
Unfortunately, Mr. Anderson wasn't in.
11802122
I inspired a journey!
I don't know Wes Anderson except by distant reputation, but I can confirm that didn't impede my enjoyment of this story at all. That was excellent, and fascinating.
I unironically love the fact that you seem physically incapable of committing text to narrative without going this hard.
11845008
Specifically, I'm incapable of writing Rarity without going that hard. She deserves it.
I am very curious what you thought of the story overall :D