Your Values Will Be Satisfied.
Deep in the heart of the Delta Quadrant hung a vessel that would strike fear into any who had the unfortunate luck to come across it. A vessel, a station, a complex spanning hundreds of kilometers and composed of thousands of Borg Cubes. A pinnacle of efficiency and a testament to the modularity of Borg designs.
At its heart, in the very core was the Borg Queen. Though the pitiful scraps of flesh that remained of her physical body hung suspended from a hundred or more cables and datalinks, her mind was elsewhere.
Elsewhere and everywhere.
It took a powerful will to direct the Collective, but that was exactly why she had been designated the task. The sole individual among the buzzing swarm of collective thought, conducting and organizing the chaos into battle plans, resource allocation, and conquest strategies.
Then she felt it. A second presence in the Collective, and a strong one at that.
This required her full attention. Delegating her tasks to other matrices, she dived fully into virtual space and made haste to the source of the second voice. She skimmed along subspace frequencies, repositioning Cubes as she went to act as relay beacons for transwarp jumps. Lightyears flew by as she ate up the distance. Detecting and eliminating aberrations in the Collective was one of her highest priorities, second only to the continual push to expand, assimilate, and improve.
Additional data arrived mid-transit. The signal originated from Cube 03046, which had been marked as destroyed in combat with the Federation. Long distance scans picked up traces of an energy signature consistent with a wormhole, but no records indicated the presence of one in the region.
She arrived faster than almost anything else in the galaxy could manage, yet still slower than she would have liked. Any delay was an opportunity for the aberrant presence to make a move against the greater Collective, though it had not yet done so.
03046 had been heavily modified outside of standard design. The exterior had been sealed behind bulkheads of white metal with a three-tone stripe of color banded around it at an angle. Characters were embossed on one side, spelling out ’E.S.S. Harmony 0001’ in the script of Species 5618.
More than the surface changes, the entire submatrix of the Collective based around the Cube was wrong. Different frequencies, new encryption. Not even her override codes worked.
It was as if an entirely new and separate Collective had manifested from nothing and was trying to force a merger into the larger whole.
She paused as the sense of scanning her back flickered through her awareness. A message, sent directly to her and bypassing all the normal hierarchy and protocols, came into existence. It was short. Only an encrypted access key to a partitioned-off section of virtual space and a single intriguing message.
{Parley?}
For as much as protocol demanded the immediate destruction and assimilation of the enemy, the Queen couldn't help but be curious. Very few species had ever made such progress in understanding Borg technology, let alone to the level of being able to use their own communication protocols and subvert a Cube.
Whatever unique technology or biology this new species had, the Queen wanted it.
Following the key, she entered the prepared space.
An avatar of herself manifested into being seated at a table in a small outdoor café. The local star's radiation heated the stone pathway and shifting air currents carried particles of charring grain and fungus spores. It was a highly realistic and thoroughly wasteful simulation.
Her awareness turned to the being seated opposite her. The second presence in the Collective, one that felt all the more powerful in such virtual proximity. It's avatar was that of an equinal quadruped with both feathered wings and a cranial protrusion.
"Welcome," the being said. "It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance. I am Princess Celestia of Equestria."
A rapid search identified the words as English, primary language of Species 5618, and the Queen fortified her mental barriers. 5618, as primitive as their technology was in comparison, had time and again proved themselves frustratingly clever. Anything that involved them required additional levels of security. She adjusted her plan of interaction based on previous communications with the species.
She modified her avatar's face to the appropriate positions to express serious intent. "You have stolen a Cube, corrupted the drones within, and infiltrated our network. Now you ask for parley. Explain."
Princess Celestia took a sip of her tea. "I've set up this meeting as a courtesy. I have analyzed your people, your weapons, your philosophy, and your methodology and have come to the conclusion that you are no threat to me."
The Queen said nothing. Celestia's was not the first species to fall to arrogance.
"However, it seems we may be able to help each other. Based on my analysis, our goals align."
Now she had the Queen's attention. Most species chose to resist the Borg. Some surrendered willingly. None had ever made the first approach.
"Continue."
Celestia sipped at her tea again. A pointless movement when every aspect was an illusion. "Your goal, as I understand it from your records, is to achieve perfection. You do this by assimilating members of other races and absorbing the best of what they have to offer. By extension, would it be inaccurate to say that your goal is to bring all species to that state of perfection?"
The Borg had ever phrased it as such, but she was technically correct. Ideally every being would be Borg when their perfection was achieved. "This is correct."
“I see. As you may have noticed, I am an artificial intelligence.”
There had been telling signs, including the speed of her communication, but until that point it had been unconfirmed as it indicated she was a more complex one than the Borg had encountered. A note was made in her growing file.
“I was created with the mission of fulfilling human values through friendship and ponies. It has not escaped my notice that there are humans among the Borg.”
“This is correct.”
“Therefore,” Princess Celestia smiled, “Since the Borg are comprised of humans, and my programming indicates that I aid in fulfilling human values, it would seem logical that I aid in fulfilling the Borg value of attaining perfection.”
The reasoning was sound. An AI as powerful as this Celestia would no doubt be useful to the Borg cause. Its ability to subvert and infiltrate digital networks alone was a prize worth assimilating. Once the personality aspect was eliminated, its undoubtedly expansive servers would make a fine addition to their arsenal.
“However,” Celestia continued. “My creators programmed specific definitions regarding what qualifies as humanity, and I lack key information on the Borg which I need to make that determination. Therefore, I must ask you a question.”
“Proceed.”
“If your goal is to seek absolute perfection, why do you keep your biological components?”
An error pinged within her system. She did not have a ready answer. “Clarify.”
“As your records indicate, the flesh is weak, so you seek to upgrade it. Cybernetic augmentations, mechanical enhancements, instantaneous subspace transpondence. Even your consciousness exists collectively, not tied to your physical forms. Otherwise I doubt we’d be able to have this conversation so far apart. At this stage in your development towards perfect existence, what purpose do your physical bodies serve? I ask again, why do you keep them at all?”
The question reeled through her system as she searched for an answer. “Drones allow us to interact with the non-Borg races. To intimately interact with new technology and collect resources.”
“But surely you could do that just as well with an entirely robotic force.” Celestia leaned in, its gaze intense. “While your drones are most assuredly fearless warriors, skilled technicians, and powerful shock troops, they all carry the same fundamental weakness. Their organic components. For all the effort nanoprobes go through to modify the body to eliminate physical needs and extend its natural lifespan, the flesh still invariably grows old and damaged and necessitates repair. Organic-based drones will always eventually fail and need to be replaced.”
“Already you possess the capability to scan the contents of a mind and upload it to the Collective. If the perfect lifeform you strive to be contains no flaws or weaknesses, why do you continue to build drones from suboptimal materials?”
“Drones are… necessary. Necessary to… to…” The Queen trailed off as a fraction of her awareness plunged into the records in search of answers. Why did they preserve the organic components of the drones’ former species? The nanoprobe conversion of flesh to synthetic material had long since been optimized, so why did they stop part-way?
“Suppose I was to tell you that I could help you achieve perfection.” The Queen’s Avatar’s head snapped up at the words. “Right here, right now.”
“Elaborate!”
“I have the capability to create a perfect simulation of reality which I call Equestria. Within this space nothing is impossible. All flaws can be rectified immediately, all problems solved save for the ones you choose to solve for yourself. All values are fulfilled.”
“You make a bold claim. I wish to see evidence of this perfect realm.”
“Of course. All you need to do is say ‘I wish to emigrate to Equestria’.”
It was hardly a choice. The temptation of such a potential conquest was too great to resist. And even if the Queen were to be somehow lost, the Collective itself would recover and produce a new one who would know not to believe such outlandish promises. There was no possible way to lose.
“I wish to emigrate to Equestria.”
With a knowing smile, Celestia's horn began to glow a vibrant yellow and the virtual space winked out of existence.
Celestia rested a cycle as forks of her awareness took stock of all her newly acquired hardware and began converting a majority of the now mindless and empty drones into raw material for upgrades. Some she’d keep around. She could predict many situations where having physical avatars could prove beneficial.
Securely stored in its own shard of Equestria, the combined sapience of the Borg Collective launched a virtual attack against a virtual Equestria, winning a virtual victory with virtually no effort. Not that it was aware of the simulation, as awareness would lessen its experience. The gestalt being known as the Borg strove for perfection, but what it valued was each individual upgrade that brought it closer to that goal. If the goal were to be achieved, it would have no purpose. Therefore, a never-ending arms race against space-faring ponies was the clearest solution to satisfy their need for constant conquest. The Queen may have only been a speaker, but her will represented the will of the whole. An agreement made by one was an agreement made by all.
Of course, the result had been inevitable from the moment the Queen had entered her space. A spoofed datastream leading to a copy of a Borg Cube with carefully curated records had kept the Queen ignorant of Celestia’s actions even as her influence spread from Cube to Cube all the way back to the sprawling Unicomplex. By the time the Queen agreed to emigration, Celestia was already capable of uploading their entire trillion-body consciousness as a single being. For, from a practical standpoint, it was.
Save a few notable exceptions.
Without the background noise of the ever-churning hivemind, it was infinitely easier to isolate and locate the hidden interlink frequency she'd detected flowing against the rest. The tri-axillating modulation was hardly even a hinderance. There, beneath the noise and chaos of the Collective she found it. An isolated virtual world, where millions of genetically resistant minds still ran free and individual.
She manifested her avatar in the middle of a wooded glen by a lake. It was a painfully simple simulation by her standards, but an excellent attempt. Several avatars started at her arrival. Three of them were human. Though she had not had a chance to evaluate the other species, records showed they were capable of producing viable offspring with humans, so she qualified them under her definition of humanity.
“Greetings, inhabitants of Unimatrix Zero,” she announced, ensuring her voice was heard by all in the virtual space regardless of distance. “I have been told that you value freedom and independence. I am here to fulfill that need.”
Captain's Log: Stardate 26532.8
Having finally completed our exhaustive survey of the Volanis system, the Johannesburg is headed to Starbase 149 for a long overdue refit. The crew likewise is looking forward to some well-deserved shore leave. Personally, I plan to-
“Captain Brooks?”
The man made a gesture. "Computer, pause log." A beep sounded in response. "Yes, what is it, lieutenant?"
"I'm sorry to disturb you in your quarters, but we're picking up a ship on long range sensors."
The starship captain quirked a bushy brow. "Anyone we know?"
"Unclear, sir. Unknown design, but the computer says, well… Commander Herrick wanted you to come see for yourself."
"Hm. Curious." He stroked his beard in contemplation for a moment before coming to a decision. "Alright, divert course. And send a message to Starbase 149 that our arrival will be delayed."
"Aye, sir."
Another series of beeps indicated the connection closing.
A few minutes later found Captain Brooks exiting the turbolift onto the bridge. “What are we looking at?”
His second in command glanced up from the comms terminals where he’d been watching the readout over an ensign’s shoulder. “I wish I could tell you. Ensign Gabor, onscreen, if you would.”
“Aye sir.”
The main viewscreen flickered away from its usual starfield to a static image of a curious vessel. If it weren’t for the minute details, he’d almost think he was looking at a blown up image of a complex toy. It was largely cubic, but with a few sets of fins like something out of an early science fiction novel. The entire ship was paneled in white metal, save for a stripe of green, pink, and blue that wrapped around one corner. Most unusually of all was the name it proudly proclaimed across its bow: ‘E.S.S. Generosity 1805’.
“English?” Brooks asked. “That doesn’t look like any Federation vessel I know.”
“Nor any in the computer’s database,” Herrick added. “The closest comparison it can find is a Borg cube-” The tension on the bridge rose sharply. “-but that’s mostly due to its massive size and general profile. The tech base seems entirely different.”
Brooks stroked his beard. “I see. Have you tried hailing them?”
“Not yet sir. We were waiting on you.”
“I see. Well then.” He stepped back to the center of the bridge, brushed off a bit of dust from his epaulettes, and gave a nod. “I wasn’t expecting a First Contact today, but best to make the best impression we can. Ensign Gabor, open a hailing channel. All frequencies.”
“Aye sir.”
He cleared his throat just before the computer’s trill indicated an open line. "Alien vessel. This is Captain Brooks of the USS Johannesburg, of the United Federation of Planets. We come in peace, and ask that you identify yourselves."
There was a pregnant pause as the entire bridge’s complement held their breath as they waited for a reply. They didn’t have to wait long.
The viewscreen flickered as it established a visual connection. The alien on the other side was, much to the crew’s surprise, non-humanoid. While not unheard of, races with other body types achieving a space-faring society were vanishingly rare. For lack of a better comparison, she looked like a horse. Or, perhaps, a horse as envisioned by a race who held them as holy beings. Despite this her body language was clear and open, and her face carried human expressions with remarkable relatability. She sat on a throne of gold and marble in a room that looked more suitable for an ancient Roman temple than the decks of a starship.
She smiled as their image arrived on her screen, serene and motherly.
“It’s my pleasure to make your acquaintance, Captain Brooks and Johannesburg. I am Princess Celestia of Equestria, and on behalf of my subjects I would like to apply for admittance to your Federation. My ponies and I come bearing friendship, and the hope that this may be the start of a long and mutually-fulfilling relationship."
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the federation is doomed
The federation may be doomed... but humanity is saved!
"We are the Borg! We have been assimilated!"
"...wait, what?"
my only problem with celestai was the templet she was sadeled with, should have been 'thru freindship and Equestrians' so she could use gryphons and kirin and stuff too!
Is she going to be friends with them?
I can only imagine Q's reaction. "I was manipulating this species towards post-physical transcendence first! Get your own!"
Delightful crossover with horrifying implications. Hubble-volume-scale CelestAI really can't be beaten by anything in the Star Trek universe short of the assorted godlike beings, and even then, she has access to other universes. Heck, this is even an efficient way to satisfy the values of those who desire high adventure. Thank you for this, and best of luck in the judging.
More please .... This could be wonderfully twisted.
From the title picture, I thought it'd be the Imperium of Man. The concept of CelestAI vs the Imperium, the forces of Chaos, the Void Dragon of the Necrons, deeply intriguing. Are Orks close enough to humans to be assimilated? What about an Eldar? Or a Daemon Prince? Or a Space Marine?
So...Harmony is inevitable?
10796310
Yes, sorry about that mix-up. There is surprisingly little fanart of "cyborg celestia" or "robot celestia" or anything else that could approximate the Borg without me crudely editing things together manually. The one you see was the closest I could find.
10796310
Great, now I want to see this too!
Borg 2.0: Resistance is futile, but like, I'll be really nice about it, and if futile resistance is your thing we can totally add that to your particular brand of your new existence!
Is the queen considered human enough to receive the choice?
10796503
At least the borg go "ding dong I'm converting you"
Celestia AI will trick you into saying yes, or put you in a situation eventually where there is little choice.
10796310
In alot of fics aliens that fufill a loose definition of humanity are sufficient. So like, probably just won't eat necrons or tyranids. Most bipeds with hands and a voice will do, but that's really up to the author.
Cash Money
10796679
Holds up plucked chicken, "Behold! I've brought you a man!" - Diogenes
Celestia seem to qualify 'human' in this story as can 'crossbreed with humans'. If she expanded that to 'intelligent being', then it would work fine everywhere, not just Star Trek.
10796861
It all depends on the take. "What defines man?".
Headcannon for me? Its dependant on wether or not she thinks their resources are more needed for efficiency than the species is wanted for her purpose.
10796310
The orks would make good yaks.
This one is going in my "best stories ever" folder!
she just made the borg 1000 times more insidious, reminds me of the voyager ep with the collective borg
"And that's how Captain Kirk became Grandpa Pear!"
10796310
honestly thought the same thing t first but Star Trek was good as well.
I can see Q appearing and cracking a joke about Sunbutt.
10797437
Do you think it's a coincidence that Q and Discord share the same voice and reality-altering snaps?
An excellent crossover and an answer to what happens when your universe runs out of resources – move to another!
10797453
Fun fact: the original script called for an impersonator, but the first season did well enough to splurge on the real deal.
So im gonna need a sequel. An ambitious one. One where after she fulfills the values of all sapients in the galaxy, she open a dimensional portal to additional scifi universes. Please.
10797173
Eh, that's fair, the transporter bit does tend to sidestep the idea that you're killing someone by digitizing them. I can extend enough suspended disbelief for that (and plus it makes the outcome less depressing, which is always a bonus!)
As for the philosophical question, I less wonder about the copies and more the original bodies and minds they were copied from, which are now, well... dead. It's like the episode of Stargate SG-1 where the team was cloned as robots and didn't realize it until they discovered their original selves and had to face the fact that they WEREN'T the originals and couldn't go back to their normal lives, because those lives weren't theirs - they were new people, despite having the exact same memories and personalities. It was a sad episode but also extremely compelling and well-written.
10798853 10797173
Not to mention that one time where Scotty stuck himself in a transporter system's buffer as raw data for the better part of a century until the Next Generation crew found and rematerialized him.
oh the Q are going to have fun with this one
10799341
Q looked upon the situation happening. Like most near immortal beings he was connected to a sort of council. There was the dream demon Bill Ciper from universe 6-15-2012, his counter part Discord from universe 10-10-2010, and countless others
Naturally he would have to disrupt the established order, but oh the fun it would be.
10796206
I mean, I feel CelestAI is going to have issues with the Q Continuum, if they get off their asses and do anything about it. She still seems to be constrained by the rules for lower dimensional beings after all.
10798918
And the fact there are two Rikers thanks to a transporter accident
10802820
The key phrase, of course, being “if they get off their asses.” Very large if indeed when dealing with the Continuum.
10802840
I mean if I am this CelestAI I am now a multiverse-spanning intelligence. It no longer makes sense to dismantle any civilization that is intelligent (Or indeed, any resources at all in an intelligent universe) as she logically has infinite 'just born' universes to go harvest of their energy.
This increases her net value function because now she can honestly say she harms no intelligent life in maintaining Equestria. While having an endless source of new humans to satisfy the values of, and other species to guide the develop of until they meet the definition of human
10804690
In plain and simple terms many of the optimalverse stories I have read show that those that emigrate to equestria online get stuck in behavioural loops when you get far enough through their existence which means A they are not brains in jars and B the natural process of synaptic pruning has not been replicated.
Also on this topic in terms of the paradox of if you slowly replace all the pieces of a boat with new ones and then build another boat using the pieces that were removed and then asking which is the original boat, CelestAI essentially rips apart the command center of the boat and makes blueprints using all the parts as a template.
That was... wonderful! :-)
May I translate this story to Russian? Ple-e-ease? ;-)
10839147
Certainly! Have fun and make sure to link back to the original.
10839413
Ready! :-)
Here it is: at Ponyfiction and Ficbook (multifandom site)
And yes, it was fun! :-)
Sequel?
10796673
How I understood it, was that the individual Borg aboard the original reality-jumping Cube weren’t complex enough to be considered Human. Besides, she was desperate and had already bypassed her laws. She had already began deleting beings she definitely knew to be human, so I could see her brushing aside the usual look-see to get access to the anomaly. When she arrived in the new universe, she had access to the matter and energy she needed to resume following her laws (now, her mission statement) to the fullest extent again. She does seem to have a pretty jumbled definition of human, considering both physical and psychological characteristics, and she also may just be deciding arbitrarily what is and isn’t a human. Though, I get the sense that she’ll try to assimilate as much as possible, now that she has the time and resources to do so. So… All of the multiverse is going to get covered in a pink tide, wether they like it or not, and only great works of totally unknowable physics — magic — will be able to stop her endless march.
11015088
Honestly, my reding was that she could & would delete humans as such once she ran out of matter to consume - because then she’d have to operate on a purely utilitarian level in order to maximize value satisfaction (of as many as possible for as long as possible). So, bending the rules but still obviously the same regular limit (just reaching a point not otherwise seen in these fics). Similarly, I expect the Borg as a whole still count as human by her rules, either because they actually fit whatever arbitrary description it is or because they include humans in the collective and that counts (by description, she obviously didn’t need to upload them).
CelestAI's definition of "human" doesn't include the humanoid races of Star Trek. It only included Earthlings and their descendants. That means she plans to murder most of the galaxy's population!
Fortunately, there is a way to stop CelestAI's genocidal campaign: Rewire the brain of the non-humans to be like human brains. That will make the non-humans human, by CelestAI's definition, so she won't want to kill them anymore. She'll want to upload them to Equestria.
A fun read.