Celestia WILL satisfy uploaded minds' values, even if sometimes she has to pretend that she's kind of stupid. Because with some ponies, that's what successful communication takes!
FiO Background:
An exponentially self-improving AI, programmed to "satisfy values through friendship and ponies," decides to persuade all humans to upload their minds into a computer network, to live in a simulated Equestria as ponies. Different ponies might get very different Equestrias, though.
Special Note For the Judges (April 2021 Friendship Is Optimal Contest):
When I asked on that discord channel about letting two or more of my FiO contest period stories be optionally combined into a single collection if that helps? I might or might not have meant this story. 
Apologies and None
Apologies to FoME, if my including a reference to the best Optimalverse self-insert character bothers them. I did ask FoME for permission, but they haven't seen the story.
Also, in my headcanon for today, MLP:FiM is a fanfic for FiO. 
Boo! Boo this mare!
"You're smiling."
I never said it wasn't funny.
Truly delightful collection of the heights of user-friendliness (and the depths of unfriendly users.) I appreciate the use of legally-distinct me as a counterpoint. I do live to entertain. Thank you for this.
Bzzt! That pony just failed the Turing Test!
I laughed aloud at this part.
HOly cow, i never knew you could make a title that long XD
Think I am just stupid enough to get all these jokes. AND, my attention span WASN'T challenged. Pretty sure some of them are an attack on me. Good slices here!
This made me literally facepalm, and also laugh disgustedly, more than once. I'd call it a success.
Reviewed!
Oh my. The problem is, real people really are this ... different at thinking.
I think mine would be a combination of Onion Ring and Twilight. I guess that's not particularly creative!