• Member Since 2nd Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen Oct 8th, 2018


Aspiring to live under a bridge, but the man keeps holding me down.


Miss Cheerilee informs Applejack that she never passed elementary mathematics. Since every pony in Equestria is legally required to understand rudimentary math, Applejack must retake and pass a basic exam in order to avoid going back to school.

Sounds simple enough, right?

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 338 )

Oh man this is gonna be good! :pinkiehappy:

EDIT: Poor Applejack...

Applejack, what are the first three digits in pi?:ajsmug:

Comment before feature box. :moustache: Quite funny. :rainbowlaugh:

Those last two... I caught that. (So AJ's secretly an alicorn?)

Oh yeah. And it reminds me of Billy Madison.

those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it.:ajbemused:

Ha, Its sad I kinda what to see a story with Applejack attending school now with her sister just for the lols. The last question was funny as hell.

It is my greatest pleasure duty to point out a math error. Question #5, 'B' is not a correct answer. 48/(2*9+3)=2.2857142857142857142857142857143 (close but not exact)
Also, a problem presented on "word problem" notation should be solved with the order of operations going left to right.

"Really? Well, it’s about time! I’ve been sayin’ forever that the farm animals should do their part for the whole. From each according to his ability, to each according to his needs.”
Normally, Applejack would have scolded the little filly for the utterance of such communist principles, but In this circumstance, however, the mare was just happy to actually fib her way out of something for a change."
This part had me dying. :rainbowlaugh:

*sigh* Applejack Applejack Appppleeejaaccckkk... the solution is SIMPLE.
A: Go to the Library with large amounts of apple goodies and gemstones laced with some heavily fermented cider
B: Get Spike into a giddy, easily manipulated state.
C: Have the little dragon show you Twilight's 'special' book and magazine collection.
D: Blackmail Twilight into disguising herself as you with magic and taking all the tests for you, lest you have Spike 'burn' her pron stash and send it to Celestia

Short, but brilliant. That last one in particular made me laugh.
Clearly, Cheerilee dislikes the farm pony's willful ignorance of the world of academia.

Let the learning commence!!

See, this is why Applejack messed up the farm's taxes! :twilightsmile:

Short and sweet.

Poor round colt, but I was laughnig my tail of to hard to care, you can never fail to disappoint can you, Magee? Damn, that last question had me laughing so hard.

D). I will see you in class on Monday.

Epic win! Keep it up.

Short, sweet, funny. I like it!

That actually made me laugh out loud, this needs to be an episode!:pinkiehappy:

Frankly any curriculum that requires Earth ponies to pass tests on Magical Theory or High-speed Flight is stupid. Earth ponies wouldn't even need to know anything except maybe the basics.
Also, yay for lol's!

Funny fic. I did like the communist quote with Applebloom. I expected the right answer to be C. Didn't know it was a trick question.

Five questions only? Since when can MCQ have more than one answer?
"This isn't a test" - Batman.

1221292 OhgodmyLungs
My Theory is Cheerilee was watching Billy Maredeson the previous night and decided that was the best way to get AJ to Fall for her

"Equuish Literature"
(Me) Huh, ok, that's not so bad...

"Pre-classical Pony History"
(Me) Ouch. OK, just rote memorization will work here...

"Advanced Magical Theory"
(Me) Wait, wat? :pinkiecrazy: ...That's a joke, right? I mean, she's not even-

"and High-Speed Flying!"
(Me) dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Twilight_crazy.png NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT

Man I'm horrible at math to not get how it could have been A or B on the trick question.

Short and sweet. I liked it.:twilightsmile:

1222402 Haha the way it's written, there's no possible way to distinguish if there's parentheses or not in the question. The question is a pretty famous troll-math problem :trollestia:. If you do the order of operations the way it's written, the answer is 219. However, since it's written out in words, any answer cannot truly be 100% correct.

Hilarious! Her "smartness" was a bit exaggerated though :ajbemused: but it's a great story nonetheless.:ajsmug:

High-Speed Flying and Advanced Magical Theory? :applejackunsure:

YOU NEED A SEQUEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Comrade Apple Bloom? :rainbowlaugh:
And I have to say it. Question 5 is C.

1222450 Are you implying that applejack is secretly an alicorn? I would like to see that happen actually.

1222470 If you read it literally, yes, it's C. But there could be parenthesis that are there that can't be determined by the words. I guess that's too much to think about idk. :rainbowlaugh:

1222472 ehh... not really. It's just there kind of to add to the ridiculousness of Cheerilee's actions. However you can interpret it like that if you want to. I might be able to do something with that, idk.

"buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck" said Applejack:ajsleepy:

1222314 lol that's the point, Cheerilee is a troll :trollestia:

1221739 Thanks dude, I appreciate your loyalness :twilightsmile:

1222686 Never a problem, always happy to lend a hoof...or er, claw in my case:rainbowlaugh:

It was funny sure, but I'm getting kinda sick an' tired of ol' AJ being portrayed as some dumbass hick. And she's not even my favourite pony.:ajbemused:

High Speed Flight and Advanced Magical Theory?, what if Pinkie passed those two with Flying Colors(:rainbowdetermined2:=Flying Colors), Why Applejack can't?:trollestia:

:pinkiecrazy:: I know Starswirl The Bearded's Magic dictchonomy of Transfiguration and teleportation, and how to pull maneuvers that not even the Wonderbolts would ever dare!

Order of Operations says #5's answer is 219, but if you didn't memorize the Order of Operations, you'd be in tears.:applejackconfused:
And now I have to wonder what prompted Cheerilee to look through old school records in the first place, particularly Applejack's.
Maybe the Cutey Mark Crusaders went too far and this is part of Cheerilee's roundabout plan to get someone to start wrangling them in?
Or did Applejack accidentally snub Cheerilee during the Cider episode? Hmmm, so many possibilities:applejackunsure:

I swear the simplest things make the best stories. :twilightsmile:

APPURLJECK THE RETARD. Magical theory and high speed flyin'? What is Celestia expecting that somepony will randomly become an Alicorn?

This would have been a lot funnier if it didn't paint Miss Cheerilee as a smug bitch (read: butcher her character). Humorous premise but I couldn't enjoy it very much due to that.

Tell her to take an advanced calligraphy course.

"And in breaking news, the Civil Guard have begun an investigation after respected Ponyville educator Cherilee was found battered to death in a shallow grave just inside the Everfree Forest. Sheriff Lock Up has refused to speculate on suspects or motives but revealed that they are looking for a mare with an abnormally strong double-buck kick. Also unexplained was the bonfire of what appeared to be exam papers nearby."

"'This isn't the work of a disruntled student', Sheriff Lock Up added at a press conference early this morning. 'Whoever did this was a near-full-grown mare and was almost freakishly strong. Finding the person capable of this violence before they lash out again is our top priority!'"

"Ponies with any information are asked to contact the Ponyville Sheriff's Office. Mayor Mare has announced that there is a reward of 2,500 bits being offered for information leading to an arrest and conviction of the pony responsible for what she descrbed as this 'unprovoked and heinous crime'."

"Now over to Warm Front with the seven-day weather report..."

"But AJ, why do we hafta move to Appleoosia?"

"Ah just need some time away from Ponyville, Applebloom! Whats th' matter? Don't y'all want to see ya cousin Braeburn and play with them Buffalo calves?"

"It's just that me, Sweetie Bell and Scootaloo were trying to get our Bounty Hunters' cutie marks by catchin' the person who killed Miss Cherilee!"


Actually, the answer of #4 cannot be determined since it was never mentioned how many apples Duskflower originally had :P

Cheerilee seemed /REALLY/ OoC

Yay for "big sister" government. I'd think those tests would be a bit past their expiration date for regrading.


Egghead time! A bit of background on one of my favorite troll trick questions of all time, 48÷2(9+3).

{A} Technically, you follow the order of operations: left to right, multiply and divide before add and subtract:

(48÷2)(12) = 24 * 12 = 288

Meaning that the correct form of this question would be more reliably read as (48÷2)(9+3) or 48÷2*(9+3). 2(9+3) is still 2*(9+3). This answer has been the consensus among professors I've asked.

For an additional, albeit "roundabout" proof of concept, I'm going to treat 9+3 like unknown-value variables and remove them from the left-hand side of the equation:

48÷2(9+3) = x
[48÷2(12)]/12 = x/(12)
48/2 = x/12

and cross multiply:

48*12 = 2x
576 = 2x
576/2 = 2x/2
288 = x

{B} Reading it left to right out loud as the story displays it completely drops the parenthesis and changes the entire thing:

Forty-eight divided by two times nine plus three:
48÷2 = 24
24*9 = 216
216+3 = 219

Meaning the way it was worded in this story, 219 is the correct answer. Unfortunately, this is still how some people solve the problem, even when they see the parentheses.

{C} The incorrect order of operations follows the mistaken notion that in w÷x(y+z), you must solve for x(y+z) first because of the parenthesis. Wrong! But to be fair, this misconception is primarily the fault of poor wording in text books. Again, left to right, multiply and divide before add and subtract. So, let's do it the wrong way:

48÷((2*9)+(2*3)) = 48÷(18+6) = 48÷24 = 2
alternatively, 48÷(2*12) = 48÷24 = 2


(I've used an emoticon...there is no turning back now)

Edit: Something else occurred to me. Another mistake made in solving this problem is to treat the obelus (÷) like a vinculum (the line that divides figures in fractions, among other things) for something like this:

48÷2(9+3) =


This is one of the reasons why obeli are often avoided beyond basic mathematics: they tend to muddle the meaning of an equation.

Look at the bright side. At least it's not algebra she has to study.:rainbowlaugh:


High-speed flying...



(don't hate me)


I agree...she was being a bit vindictive. But it's all for the fun of the story, I guess. Could she have had it coming? It's hard to tell if they're the same age. If they went to class together, perhaps Applejack said something brutally honest to Cheerilee long ago that she had stewing in the back of her mind for years. :P

Good. I read through the comments and saw that I wasn't the only one actually doing the math. :twilightblush:

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