• Member Since 26th Jan, 2022
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Cxcd


This is gonna kill me

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3175131
Lol, I saw. I don't read much here anymore, just chatting around. 🤗

3175129
YUP. I litterally just posted a new story, so it's funny you show up litterally the same minute I do. Hallo.

3166831
I DIDNT DO ANYTHING THE NIGHT OF NOVEMBER 13TH 1996.

Oh. You mean the story ‘The Crime.’ Of course.

I really liked it. BUT. It feels like there should be an entire novel. You wrote really, really good scenebuilding and honest to Celestia character building, but it ended after red got kicked out of the hive. It makes me drool for more story following this foal- or hatchling- or whatever. But it just ended.

What if the child ended up in Ponyville and had to try and explain he wasn’t a bad changeling despite the fact he murdered one of his own?

I believe in you, man. You gave the character really good motivation and child-like goals and understanding of the world around them. This would’ve made me read an entire novel if you wrote it out, because this story feels like a really good first chapter.

TLDR: Needs longer story.

Duces.

  • Viewing 6 - 10 of 10
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