The Drift
Celestia found Twilight exactly where she’d expected to find her.
Her crown had been placed atop the gleaming stone of Shining Armor’s grave, and she was resting on the snow with her legs folded and her eyes closed. Her breathing rose in pluming vapours into the darkling autumn sky, and she perked an ear as Celestia’s hooves crunching through the snow signalled her arrival.
“Hello, dear.” Celestia greeted Twilight with a nuzzle, settling down onto the snow next to her and taking her in a wing.
"It... it doesn't get easier, does it?" Twilight opened her eyes, not to look at Celestia but instead to stare directly ahead at the fresh engravings on her brother’s tombstone.
Celestia exhaled. "For myself? It... comes and goes, I find. There are nightmares, still, but... well, a wise and kind and loving mare has seen to those quite well." Celestia smiled at Twilight, but she didn’t seem to reciprocate it, instead still starting ahead. Sombrely, Celestia continued. "Other times, there are days when... when I think of my sister, and the memory feels... empty. As though I'm looking into a riverbed that I know should be flowing with life, but it just... isn't. I cannot even say that there's nothing there, because the absence of something is itself all that remains."
"And other days?"
Celestia managed a weary smile. "Other days, I think of a night with her, spent flying under the stars. I think of two young mares still fresh in their crowns, giggling and laughing at the silliness of a budding Grand Galloping Gala. I think of the decades of love between the two of us, and how much it shaped me into the mare I’ve become. So many ponies see me as this... this wise figurehead. This… statue, by whom so many other leaders should be measured. What they don't know is... I'm... I'm as much myself as I am an amalgamation of all the best memories of the ponies who have come and gone from my life."
"That... that must be hard."
"Sometimes it is. Oftentimes, though... it gives me peace. It tells me that... if those ponies were to meet me again, as I am now, after so many years... they might still like me for the mare I am. We might still rekindle the same love that so much time has failed to steal away. And that is humbling. It makes me feel... mortal.”
“I just... I keep thinking of all the times my brother... tried to call me. All the times I refused to answer, or refused his offers to meet, or swore at him... Celestia, it doesn't feel like I'll ever stop feeling that…”
“Regret is... early. It strikes hard and fast, and it often does so without reason. It invents or distorts situations in order to manifest itself as efficiently as possible. It is simply... the way it is, for ponies like us. Victims of our own self-doubt, you and me both. But Twilight, what I say next is the important part... Regret, hatred, anger, fear… those strike early, but they don’t always crystallize the way the other emotions do. Love... I’ve found that that crystallizes with ease.”
‘“Let's not be strangers anymore…’” Twilight breathed out. "It's... it's the last thing I can remember saying to him. I’ll never get the chance to follow up on that. Not because I didn’t want to, or because he didn’t. The chance was just… stolen from us. How is that fair, Celestia?”
“It is not. And you are right to be angered by it.”
“And then, they almost stole you from me. It would’ve been over for me if they would have. I would have had no one. I would’ve been no one.”
“Now that just isn’t true at all.” Celestia shook her head. “You would be the unicorn who would bring the Sun back to Equestria.”
Twilight scoffed. “Yeah, right.”
“You would have, Twilight. It might take you years. Decades. But you would have.”
Twilight levitated her crown off of the tombstone, turning it over and over in her magic. Running her aura over the meticulous engravings and the carefully polished gemstones. “That’s really kind of you to say, Celestia, but I’m afraid I just don’t believe you.”
“That is because you sometimes neglect to include yourself in your own kindness, Twilight Sparkle.” Celestia nodded her head to Shining Armor’s grave. “Your brother used to say that about you, you know.”
“Did he?”
“He did. I mean, granted, he was talking about a magically gifted little filly who ponies just couldn’t seem to stop from pulling all-nighters hidden beneath her covers reading, but I do believe the effect is the same.”
Despite everything, Twilight managed a little chuckle. “Yeah. He caught me a few times. Never ratted me out to mom, though, so I guess I have that to thank him for.”
“He would be so proud of the mare you’ve grown into, Twilight.”
“Yeah, well. He won’t be anymore.” Twilight looked away again, her ears sinking back down against her head. “Not ever again. I waited long enough to guarantee that.”
“Twilight…”
“No, Celestia. I need to carry some of this. Because it’s on me. Maybe not… maybe not losing him. But never finding him before, when I had the chance. Refusing to be the sister he needed? That’s on me.”
“Dear, please. I know you think it’s what’s fair to him, but...”
“I know how much Luna’s scars hurt you, Celestia.” Twilight cut in before Celestia could finish. “I know how you carry that weight. This is mine, and I deserve to carry it. Don't you dare deny me that. I can do my damnedest to make sure the ponies responsible pay--and believe me, I will--but even that will never wipe away the truth that I deserve to share that guilt myself."
“Twilight, trust me when I say that doing so is not the penance you think it is. Your brother loved you. Your brother would have given anything to protect you. And he certainly would be the first to chide you for thinking that you deserve to drag yourself down over what was done to him.”
“Then what? I just forget? I just clean my hooves of what I could’ve done to help him? Like, ‘Oh well, I tried!’” A bitter edge had crept into Twilight’s voice--it didn’t feel as though it was directed at Celestia, though. More directed at the icy graveyard around them instead.
“No…” Celestia shook her head slowly. “But… well, you already know the answer to that problem yourself. I’ve seen you do it yourself, for me. When I slip into my nightmares of Luna, or Cadance. When the demons of my guilt start to claw at me, and you swoop in to help. To save the day. You do not do so by simply purging those demons in wondrous flashes of light. You do so by reminding me that they do not have to be alone. For every vivid reminder of my failings, you’ve shown me a dozen of my strengths. For every bitter trauma reminding me of my sister, you’ve reminded me that at one point, we’d had a bond that was unshakable, with which we accomplished great things and helped many ponies."
Twilight sighed. “I guess. I don't know."
“My point, Twilight, is this; When things get too much for you, don’t retreat backwards in your own guilt. Don’t make that mistake as I did, because we all deserve happiness and nopony should have to intentionally withhold it from themselves. The ponies responsible for your brothers death will be brought to justice. And until that happens, and for as long as you need after, you have ponies who are here for you, and who care for you, no matter what.”
“Maybe.” Twilight shrugged, running a hoof across the snow. “I mean. I only have a hoof-full of friends.”
“And you trust them all with quite a lot, from what I gather. Friendship isn’t a numbers game, Twilight. There’s no ‘winning’ friendship, and certainly not something you’d hope to do so by amounting as many as possible. You’re loved, Twilight, and you’re not alone. And sometimes, remembering that is all you will need.”
“And other times?”
Celestia smiled wearily. “As I said. It comes and goes. Losing somepony is a long and winding journey. But, so long as you hold the love you felt for your brother close to you, and as long as you have fond memories of him in your heart, you will always find the path.”
“I’ll… I’ll try,” Twilight said, and as Celestia looked into her eyes, she knew that she meant it. “I’m sorry, Celestia.”
“Sorry? Whatever for?”
“For ditching you in New Canterlot. Supposed to be there for you. Supposed to be your second in command.”
Celestia laughed. “Don’t be silly, Twilight. I can handle a simple little return speech on my lonesome.”
“That’s obvious. I more meant for the emotional end of things.”
“Ah, yes. Well, your emotions matter to me as much as mine do to you. Join me when you feel ready to, and not a moment sooner.” Celestia outstretched a wing towards Twilight’s side--not to touch it, but merely to point it out. “How’s the barrel? Still hurting?”
Twilight shrugged. “A bit, yeah. Might get it looked at if it continues.”
“Yes, it wasn’t exactly a pleasant process for me, either.”
“W-what wasn’t?”
Celestia gave Twilight a coy look, folding her wings back against her side for emphasis. Twilight seemed to understand the gesture, and forced a nervous little chuckle herself.
“Okay then, Celestia.” Twilight swished her tail, rising to her hooves only to shake off the snow that had been gathering there, before sitting back down once again. "How did I do with the Sun?"
"Wonderfully, Twilight. I had meant to say; the sunset was particularly gorgeous on the flight in."
Twilight smiled. "Still a little bummed I can only lower it."
"Please, don't be so critical of yourself. You will build a connection with it in the months to follow. At the rate you are learning, I would not be surprised to see you raising it in a year's time, Sunstone or not."
Twilight looked away, a sheepish little blush on her face. “I guess we'll see."
Silence fell between them again. Somewhere in the cemetery, a pair of crows were bickering, and the wind blew softly through the wispy tree branches now naked of their leaves.
"How about you?" Twilight glanced over to Celestia. "How are you faring?”
Celestia waved a hoof. “I… think things are going okay.”
“You think?” Twilight rose an eyebrow. “But…?”
“I don’t know.” Celestia shrugged. “It’s a silly worry, and only an occasional one.”
“Trust me, I know how those feel.” Twilight smiled. “Go on, Celestia. I’m listening.”
“It just… feels like the world went… wrong, somewhere. Like we somehow got shunted off course, and no matter how much we try to correct our path, what’s done has already been done. Maybe we had time to change where we’re going, but part of me worries… part of me worries that it’s still too late, even with myself in power once again. I worry that no matter what, the happy ending I want is… is a dream of mine I’m telling myself is true to keep the pain of the end from stinging too much.”
Twilight bit her lip. “I know what you mean. Where do you... think that point was? Where we got off course?”
“I do not know for certain. I’ve had plenty of time to think of it, though, and in that time I’ve had a few theories. Tirek seems a turning point, certainly, but I think it all went wrong before. Before Nightmare Moon’s return, even.”
“Well. I can tell you where my life went wrong. The bloody entrance exam. Everything up to that point… my future was just so bright. And everything since… it’s like nothing has turned out the way I wanted it to. Everything keeps breaking apart, and I do my best to put it back together again, and everytime I do, I lose another piece. I’m terrified that one day, there’ll be nothing left to put back together anymore.”
Celestia gave a single nod. “Well. For what it’s worth, Twilight… I wouldn’t change a thing about you. Everything that makes you up, all these things you claim to be failures or cracks or imperfections… to me, they are each part of an ever-growing list of things that make you the most perfect mare I’ve known in all my days.”
Twilight glanced at Celestia with a doubtful look, though her skepticism slowly vanished as she met Celestia’s eyes. Celestia had been wary of so many things in her life, but there wasn’t a shadow of doubt or exaggeration in anything she could possibly say about Twilight Sparkle.
Twilight herself did not answer, and the two fell silent. Celestia hacked out a single cough which might as well have been a grenade going off beside them, for all the response it earned from Twilight.
A sideways look, as sadness and sympathy replaced her skepticism.
“I still want this to last, Celestia. This… this thing we have. I can’t shake the feeling that it’s more short-lived than it deserves to be.”
“It’s just a cough, Twilight. I’ll get better.”
Twilight looked away.
“Why is it so hard to believe you?” she whispered. "Why do I know that you're only telling me what I want to hear?”
“Perhaps it is because you are right, and I don’t want to admit it. But… perhaps it is simply because you still don’t believe that you deserve a happy ending.”
“As if you believe you deserve one?” Twilight managed a chuckle, but it was strained and sad instead of lively and breezy. “You hypocrite.”
“Yes, well. We’re both learning, aren’t we? We’re both helping each other.”
She received no response from Twilight. She continued staring straight ahead at her brother’s tombstone.
“Twilight,” Celestia said. “I promised you I wouldn’t give up. I promised you I would fight forever to stay a part of this world. Now, I’m not trying to be rude, but I see little else before you but a choice. You can trust me in that regard and do your best to help me achieve that goal, or you can continue assuming the worst will happen and letting it drag you down into yourself. But I meant what I promised you. I will fight forever.”
Twilight was silent again, for nearly a minute.
Finally, she spoke again, her voice a tiny little whisper.
“Okay.”
Twilight rested her head on Celestia, and Celestia in turn took Twilight beneath her wing. The cemetery was desolate, and sombre, and the night grew colder and darker by the moment, but Celestia would have been content if it was the last moment she was ever afforded.
Click here for a brief afterword.
And here we are at the end. Thank you all so much for reading, after all these words and all these years it's taken me to finally get to this point. This story developed into more of a passion project than I ever would have imagined, and it hasn't always been easy to bring it forwards.
Regardless, thank you all for reading and for commenting and for being an infinite source of support while I've been working on this story. It means more than I could ever say.
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Thank you so much for this world, Norris.
Norris! What a journey. Congrats. :)
Thank you kindly for the story.
it was an absolute joy following this story over the years. thank you for a lovely experience!
And it hurts to see such a beautiful piece end.
What a story. I don't even know what to say, other than: Thank you so much for writing it. I'd lost hope on it ever continuing after the hiatus it was on... I kinda don't want it to end... I dunno if you'll write any more stories, or continue the ones left unfinished, but I know I'll read them for sure, if you do.
This is a great story. Thank you very much for writing it.
I saw a couple of typos, but this one amused me most. Such sacrilege.
10767111
I loled.
Thanks.
I'm leaving an upvote because you stuck with it and the dedication and writing quality deserves commendation.
But. It's... narratively a mess. Not a story of optimism; a story of blind, unreasoning optimism. And also an AU tag is missing, there's core differences from canon.
1. Luna. A distinct entity from Nightmare Moon, 'torn apart by dark magics', sealing a bit of her soul into the Sunstone (for some reason?..), dead for longer than her supposed exile. There's no way the Elements could help her in this situation.
2. The sapients of Equis. They don't exist. There's ponies and changelings, nothing and nobody else. Neighsay's paradise.
3. The Sunstone. Luna's out of the picture, so what does Celestia do with her back-up plan? Let it fade into obscurity. And, naturally, when it was needed, nobody was there to take advantage of it. The original ritual to manage the Sun, however imperfect it was, was also forgotten. The only possible reason for this much negligence, besides blind optimism, is to deliberately cause the exact kind of situation Suntrotter project was designed to solve.
4. Celestia, concerned with the fate of an ailing world, just about trades herself for a handful of ponies, one of whom is also her mortal enemy. She gets fantastically lucky, and instead of dying and taking the world she cares for with her* she just puts a very limited timer on herself.
4.5. She does this a lot, taking unnessesary risks with no backup plan. The Sunstone retrieval was even worse, it wasn't urgent, she just got bored and decided to throw a coin on the fate of the world. The world got lucky, that time. One can't help but wonder if this is why Tirek fight and it's consequences went so badly.
The story's also being deliberately vague on if Celestia is actually healing or not like she expects she would. Maybe she needs decades, maybe it's more of the 'unreliable narrator'`s unreasoning optimism. Meh.
I'm also kind of wary of the described pace of technological development. For example, what does the nation eat, if the soil and air is poisoned and magic is considered archaic so the earth ponies shouldn't grow things like they did basicly forever? What do the factories produce, and for what purpose? Only thing that seems to exist is corporation members and workers, and the latter can't really afford anything. I can imagine people willing to abandon magic after Tirek; fear would make it seem unreliable. But how would the entire species achive that in 11 years? Or, realistically, much faster than that since this state of things is implied to exist for years already. It would make more sense if Celestia's time-skip could be a century, but here it really is jarring. You can't even build enough stuff for all of this to work without magic in the alloted timeframe.
*
'Belief' doesn't matter here as none of this matters. Moondancer describes not two weeks ago the Sun destabilisiing exponentially. In two weeks they had barely enough power to get it back on track together. Failing that, it would be over. And even if not, the only way Twilight would even get years or decades is by turning into a lich. Only to return the Sun for her alone, among the frozen wasteland.
10767198
I'm grateful for the comment and upvote all the same, and sorry it wasn't your cup of tea. Cheers.
10767087
During that Hiatus, I made a few attempts to continue this story and they always felt like I was just kinda shitting it out just to wrap it up. It didn't feel fair to my readers, and I wasn't in the best place with it, creatively and such. I know I probably could've trucked through then, but better late than never, I guess.
The Crystal Pony fic will definitely get finished since it's only supposed to be four to six chapters long anyways. After that I've got a few other longfic ideas that I'll probably shift my focus to, as well as a few oneshot ideas. I don't plan on abandoning writing anytime soon, this project has only served to rekindle that interest for me--despite consuming much of my attention, haha. Regardless, Thank you kindly for your interest, it really means a lot.
Thank you so much for this story, one of the greats in my mind.
10767246
Hm, maybe you got the wrong impression; I definitely don't blame you for taking a break. Sometimes the creative process takes awhile, and I'd rather have a quality story than a half-baked one done out of "obligation" to the readers. It's just that I've seen far too many great stories not get finished, and I was thinking that might be the fate of this one and maybe your others. That said, I'm happy to hear you're going to be pursuing more writing. I'll look forward to your stories :)
finally, another story to add to the pile of "best fanfictions."
thank you
Based finished story writer. You may now rest again. Just don't think too hard about your other unfinished works now.
this was beautiful
As someone who has been reading this story since 2015, thank you for the beautiful ending. When I saw a new chapter posted after 2 years I was overjoyed, because I genuinely thought this story had died. To not only finish this story after a 2 year hiatus, but to give it such an amazing ending is phenomenal and shows your incredible skill as a writer. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for completing this work of art.
It’s been a wonderful, emotional journey, and I can’t thank you enough for seeing it through to a satisfying finish! This story moved me and provided me with so many hours of enjoyment and emotional investment.
Well, it was a ride. A very rare entry into the "Flim Flam Villains" future of Equestria, which may be the rarest of the Cutie Remark alternate timelines to be depicted, though my favorite will always be from a dimension hopping Sunset fanfic.
10738489
it’s fiction my guy, clearly their world doesn’t match our own.
Now THIS is a story! I remember clicking on this back in the day and thinking “Hey, this is a cool idea!” and being sad when I would check back in every now and again and notice that there were no new chapters to read.
And now that it’s over, I just wanted to say thank you for putting this out there. I can’t wait to see what you do next :)
Normally I would say I'm sad to see a story this majestic and wide in scope end, and yet this leaves me quite content - in a good way. It's an ending, if that makes sense - an ending to this story, but not to their story, which you've woven plenty of potential future for and even if it remains untold the fact it exists is there.
Though I do find it a teensy bit humorous the heavy implication being the next arc is Twilight Sparkle advances medical science by decades in a race to stop Celestia from succumbing to lung cancer but I have no doubt she will succeed, so while it's clear Twilight's fears are justified, I have faith her hopes will triumph.
And in that regard, thank you - I see much of myself in her, given the world we find ourselves living in today. After all, we see time and again how often justice is not served and how that same limitless greed is busy setting our world afire.
It sucks to know that there's more awful trials coming, and I am not looking forward to the pain, and yet - we endure, and we push forward. Hope endures. Darkness encroaches and yet the light continues to defiantly flicker.
So continue shining on as well, and thank you for the long journey you've led us on.
10767455
derpicdn.net/img/view/2013/3/15/270948.gif
A wonderful story coming to a wonderful conclusion! Thanks for the world you shared with us.
This is beautiful. I haven't cried so much for a fic since... Well, yesterday. But yesterday I was reading Austraeoh, so my point stands
Fantastic story. Thank you.
love a sequel, there plenty of interesting ways it could go, you could have equestria divided by former high ranking executive and the working classes, acting like a new form tribalism, ponies who cant adapt to post company life, ponies who refuse celestia rule and go into willing exile to go form a separate nation and the fallout of that, celestia slowly dying and desperately trying to stabilize equestria for that day, non pony races deciding to interfere, discord returning etc
what im saying is i am sad it over and want more
Hot dang am I behind on reading this. I guess I know what I'ma be reading once summer break comes 'round. :P
Congratulations!!!
This was amazingly done and worth the wait.
Thank you for this.
Congrats on finishing this story, as that in and of itself is something to commend. So many start but don't finish, but you did and for that I can only be eternally grateful for it. Well done fine author well done.
This was such a good story and I'm kinda sad to see it end, but at the same time I'm not. If that makes sense. Really good job, thankee sai verra much for putting it to words Norris the Pony
Omg. I blew through this story in... two days? And this was a great read. So many things... And when Luna finally showed up, I was so happy. Chekov's gun fired.
Just... so good. I had read Dusk Falls before, but didn't realize it was you, so that little eatser egg came as a surprise.
I hope Twilight will reconnect with her parents.
I thought this universe's Starlight would play a role and maybe I just missing her working in the background, but I guess she was never that important. And Sunburst, too.
Ahh, whatever. Great story. I'll stop rambling.
(P. S. When you said Fluttershy lived above a baskery, I totally thought she was with Pinkie Pie. Fine Line attending Celestia's funeral was a nice misdirection, totally filled me. And I didn't missed Celestia calling Twilight her marefriend back when she was talking to the thestrals.
Reading this story from the beginning was a privilege and thank you for allowing us to witness it.
Congratulations on finishing! so many projects of mine that lay unfinished...
Thank you again and may the future be bright.
10776009
Theyre just socially distancing bro
10776041
Nice.
So I'm rereading this because I haven't since I have that review years ago.
I'm caught up to where I stopped and I'm still loving it. A true dramatic thriller.
This was a great story from start to finish. The atmosphere and tone work a treat. Hope for the future and all that
They fired the thing and I'm just shocked.
You done good, I'm almost biting my nails here too see where it goes.
Fantastic story, worth the wait.
10776999
Thank you kindly
10777355
You should write a short story about Celestia passing and Twilight's reaction. Stoic and ready, but vulnerable and afraid for the future.
From start to finish this was a wholly engrossing tale and I only wish I had started sooner. You've done an excellent job with it man, truly and honestly some incredible work.
10786367
Thank you very much, I really appreciate it.
Well, it's been quite a ride. Has it really been that long since the beginning? Wow. Thank you, Norris. What a world you've made.
This story suffers from a lack of description. Almost did not pick up this story, as I had no clue what it's about.
The setting is quite interesting and I feel more people would read it, if the initial underground arc would have been mentioned.
Absolutely wonderful! I'm so glad to see this through to the finish, it's been a long journey and this fic will forever hold a place in my heart I can tell you that.
I just woke up so I can't really say too much other than I loved it lmao. I think the biggest strength of this fic was the worldbuilding for me. I can tell there was a lot of care and effort into crafting an Equestria that makes sense in context but that still felt like Equestria. Not always an easy feat!
My greatest critique is probably consistent characterization, more of a nitpick really because overall you do a very good job, just at times things feel a little shallow or rushed, particuarly Celestia and NMM at times. But it's understandable given how long the fic is, how long it's been going, and just how many character you have to keep track of xD.
Thank you for the great journey!
It's been an absolute pleasure to read this story, thank you for writing it :D
Six weeks.
I have waited to finish this thing for six weeks.
Over six weeks actually, and "waited" is just a fancy way for me to say I put it off. I am not ashamed to admit I was terrified to see how you concluded this. That fear is what led to the SIX WEEK wait I put myself through before reading this to the end.
I don't really have any words that would due this story justice in my eyes. It gripped me from the first chapter. It tore my heart out throughout its duration in so many ways I never thought possible. It was funny. It was heartbreaking. It was utterly astounding. It made me laugh and appreciate and think more than most stories I have ever read. And it pulled me along through the many breaks between chapters, always making me come back for more.
So much care and thought was put into this story. The characters, though different from the ones we know in many ways, never felt forced or wrong or anything like that. Every alteration you took felt right, deserved even. Despite the drastically different continuity, everyone (or everypony) still felt so real and sincere that they seemed more grounded in reality than other stories. The twists and turns on the lore thrown at us just added flavor to this already colorful (that word is kind of ironic for this story) cast of characters that we love and love to hate.
Strangely, for being such a dark story, I also found it oddly optimistic at the same time. Many of the sadder and more tragic things happen offscreen and are only mentioned, but that never subtracts from how gut wrenching they feel through their portrayal. And yet, I couldn't help but smile and applaud the courage you were able to give each character and how you allowed them to grow. The drive you gave these characters to persevere through the horrible things that had been done to them (mainly talking about Celestia, Twilight, and Nightmare) and the world is utterly awe inspiring. Never before has a story affected me in such an unexplainable way that I cannot even understand my own love for it.
The ending is so bittersweet it makes my heart both leap for joy and cry out in agony, especially with Nightmare. My god, I love how you wrote her, but I'll allow myself to be a bit bitter at how I didn't get to see a goodbye. She is, without any doubt, my favorite character in all of this. Marvelously tragic, that.
When this baby finally hit over 1,000 likes, I couldn't help but smile. Certainly, this story deserved at least that if not more.
My god. . . what a ride, what a journey.
I am certainly not happy that it is over, but god damn am I happy that I was able to read it. Bloody fantastic, Norris. Absolutely fantastic.
Cheers to you, mate. Cheers to you.
p.s. If you ever want to explore this continuity more, you'll get no complaints from me.
p.p.s. Sorry for the long comment.
p.p.p.s. Seriously, though, I hate you for that Nightmare thing. My heart.
10833335
Maybe one day, and probably just as a oneshot. There's still so many ideas in this world I never found the right place to touch upon, but whether or not the desire to write them eclipses my desire to move onto other projects I don't know.
My friend, long comments, negative or positive, are the ultimate reward to me as a writer. Don't apologize, because I'm extremely grateful that you not only took the time to read, but comment as well.
She's my personal favourite in this fic, as well. Having her fate feel sudden and abrupt was intentional, though, because I wanted the reader to be forced to empathize with Twilight's own reaction to it.
Anyways, thank you again for the warm comment. Brightened up my day.
I remember writing a lengthy comment on one of your other stories (Dusk Falls), which I didn't really like. I'm pretty sure that at the time, I was already tracking this one, and I had to choose between untracking or continue to track and hope for the best. I suspect the tags and the fact that it was in the Twilestia group have influenced my decision.
I'm so glad I continued to track it. Come 2020 I had pretty much forgot about it but then it started getting regular updates again, and I could feel myself getting hyped for when it hopefully eventually completed every time there was a new chapter, if only because there's just not enough Twilestia.
From the beginning I was hooked, and it only got better from there. It has caused me to stay awake reading longer than I really should have on more than one occasion, which is a good sign.
My main critique(s) from Dusk Falls are also not present here. Of course, this story works geographically different from that one, but there's still travel involved, and building exterior/interior descriptions, and so on. But here they Just Work.
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Hey I was thinking about this this story should also have a prequel and also a sequel. How do we know how the film flam brothers got so powerful? Were they smart enough to plan their takeover? How did it affect Sweet Apple acres and how did it affect other business like rarity’s boutique and sugar cube corner? All of the people who read your story do have questions. I actually am wondering about sweet apple acres. If you are planning a prequel and or a sequel we should see the aftermath and celestia rebuilding equestria. But if you’re not planning a sequel or a prequel it’s okay with me but maybe you should think about it. Take your time with planning and if it doesn’t work it’s okay you don’t have to make a sequel or a prequel.