13. Wrought its Ghost Upon the Floor
Celestia lurched sideways into a tree. “I’ll n-n-never get used to that,” she muttered to herself. Jumping across timelines disoriented her. It felt like teleporting while on a torture rack, like her body stretched and broke as she stood in a single place. She took a deep breath.
She looked up. The sun and moon had shifted, of course. She focused on them, and their position and the stars confirmed the date and time. She looked up. The Everfree Forest smelled the same as always. Her old castle loomed ahead of her.
She shook her head. Even if she had the timing right, she needed to focus. She cast a vision spell, and looked towards the window that she knew must be Luna’s bedroom. She inhaled sharply.
Luna was there. Nightmare Moon stood next to her. They were talking, gesturing. Luna cast a spell, and a lash of magic cut across Nightmare Moon’s chest.
Celestia looked away. “Too m-m-much magic might draw attention to me,” she told herself. She waited. She knew what was about to happen, but that didn’t mean she had to watch it.
Seconds passed. Minutes followed. The sun’s position ticked slowly, but surely, ensuring she knew exactly how much time had passed.
She winced. The scream sounded faint, even to her magically enhanced hearing. But it wafted out the window and down to her spot nonetheless.
She waited again. She recast the vision spell. Nightmare Moon had left the room, blue flames licked at the corners. Now was the time.
She teleported into the room, right next to Luna’s side. She winced at the sight. Luna’s blood had already coated the floor, her eyes had rolled upwards, her wings and legs poked out at odd angles.
Celestia took a deep breath and knelt down. A minor spell would keep the flames away. And no doubt her alternate self and Nightmare Moon would be too distracted by each other to notice her magic.
It took a while. Celestia had to coax air back into Luna’s lungs, fix all her broken limbs. She had to straighten every bone, every tendon, every vein and capillary that had been damaged.
She leaned down, gingerly lifted up Luna’s head. Luna’s lips still felt warm, the heat of life still clinging to her body.
Celestia kissed her. She poured magic into Luna’s body. Her lips and horn tingled as they rubbed against Luna’s. It only lasted a few moments, but for once, Celestia ignored her connection to the sun and let herself lose track of time.
Luna screamed. Her eyes snapped open and she screamed again. After all that, Luna lay there, sucking in breath after breath. Finally, once she had enough strength and air, she screamed a third time. Each one sounded so quiet, so fragile.
Celestia embraced her sister. She leaned down, put her mouth right next to Luna’s ear. She used the gentlest, most comforting tone she could muster. “D-don’t worry, s-sister. I’m h-here. Now let me t-take you home.”
They disappeared in a flash of light.
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So she raised Canon Luna as a lich like herself and took her back instead, well guess she got her wish in the end after all.
Bravo!
Ahhh. The Raven. Very clever choice of chapter titles!
The first two stories were both tragedies in this.
And now, the trilogy has a bittersweet happy ending. I am glad.
An interesting bit of justice. Luna became the Nightmare, killed Celestia, then tried to save herself in another time, and was forced to murder herself. In effect, serving justice on Luna for the crime she was about to commit.
Now the revived Celestia has returned to claim the other Luna who does not have the benefit of time and endless penance to redeem her. She will help atone for NIghtmare's crimes in the same way that Nightmare tried to atone for Luna's.
Man, this is one of the most thought-provoking pieces of literature that I've read in a long, long time. I haven't seen something of this quality in years, and I'm ashamed that I haven't found this story earlier. I just binge read the trilogy of this series and through all the tragedy, I've never seen an ending that has quite fit a story such as this. Truly a masterpiece. I'd love to see more work from you!
You keep kiving your readers cookies and milk.
. . .
And our hunger continues to grow.
Keep up the great work!
Who would win in a death battle? Chaos-powered Celestia, or Nightmare Luna with thousands of years more magical knowledge?
Her stutter is distressingly, adorably, terrifying.
If this is the end of your fan fiction career, it is a darn fine ending!
That was perfect... I wish there was more but if this is how you are going out. Bloody well done!
Wow.
Incredible sequel.
Well done!
I think I need more. Like an extra chapter or a small fic set years/millennia ahead when things are slightly better. Princess Nightmare Moon and Princess Celestia are finally almost perfectly friendo again, and Lichlestia and Lichuna are past the "ima hurt you real bad" phase and are just rebuilding Equestria.... then we can have an Undead Equestria vs Equestria war! jk.
7470997
Sequel
7471133
It must be added in end of this story!
Superb dialogue and characterization as always. Looks like my favourites tab is getting a new addition.
Oh, hey, I just saw that artwork last night and the comments mentioning how it'd need a story. It's good to see a longer story giving it justice, I'll definitely give it a read now.
So Zombie luna and celestia...
Holy hell, this was amazing!
Hey-la, CleverPun,
I tried to write something witty or amusing here, or even a sonnet as I sometimes do when I am particularly touched by a story. My Muse, however, was too busy processing the complexities of said story and its emotional impact.
This is a powerful piece. It moved me to to tears, and also reminded me of the spark of hope that lives within me. Further, it reinforced my personal choice to avoid holding onto pain or vengeance, and to seek reconciliation - or at least some form of peace - with those who have harmed me... at least, where such is a reasonable response. It isn't always, and that's okay, too.
Honestly, I don't know what more I can say than that this tale had a significant impact on me. I've become rather sparing in my marking of stories as Favorites, but it was an easy choice with this one. Thank you for creating and sharing it.
Light and laughter,
SongCoyote
I managed to guess exactly where this was going about halfway through it, which in this case I think was an indication of it being well-designed.
My question is whether they will start over or simply resurrect everyone...
MORE!
Also, as far as sequels go, this was AMAZING.
Oh wow. I have no words. I didn't expect this at all, even after what happened, but... I suppose I never would have. Lichlestia was a fantastic character, and I'm so happy that after such a dark series, all characters got a matter of reconciliation with each other, in spite of everything. It's not perfect, and it'll never be perfect, but it'll get better.
(I would love to see Lichestia's Luna healing, though, because she's still quite insane, even if getting murdered might have jolted a tiny bit of sense back into her.)
More than I could have hoped for, all in all. An amazing conclusion to an amazing concept.
Damn, what a trilogy.
I'm going back and fave-ing all three.
I kind of would like to see what happens after lichlestia brings li'l Luna back to alter-Equestria... think you might be up for that?
7473316
That WOULD be something to see.
This is an awesome story!
The only thing I find odd or out of sorts is the lack of reaction from most everyone involved.
Twilight should have at least flinched or gagged at the undead form of someone she cares about...same for Cadence.
It is still a good story I am just saying it feels like the reactions that they would have to an undead Celestia that ripped out Discords still beating heart, and is now seeking revenge is so subdued that I wondered if they all took a dose of medication before hand.
I am not telling you how to write the story of course, I am just simply giving my feed back.
That was not the ending I was expecting. Bravo.
All three of these stories were tragically beautiful in their own way.
7473319 ah, ok. I can see that.
This is nice.
Wow. That was intense. After I finished reading, I just sat there, staring at the screen.
+ Nice characterisation.
+ Plot twists
- Alicorns do not seem wise enough
- + But they do not in canon either
- The main conflict is rather plain, and the climax of the story is anticlimactic
- + the story isn't about it.
.....
Well, definitely above average, but not a thumb up.
7473800 when you deal with existential and world bending terrors on a weekly basis, you kinda get a bit jaded to things like an undead version of yourself coming to take her baggage back to her own dimension.
7474485 your too used to linear stories, that rely on basic story writing principals. A great story doesn't need basic writing algorithms to define it's path.
7470789 Flavor text.
7472426 Fiction can be very powerful. There are some stories and scenes and even lines from works that I still remember, that spoke to me in a very fundamental way. I consider them a part of my soul.
Knowing something I wrote affected someone else in that way, that's one of the highest things an author can hope for. Thank you for sharing it.
7471729 The art didn't inspire the story. I was looking through derpibooru for "Corrupted Celestia", and this picture seemed the closest to what I was going for.
That was something different, somehow distanced and dreamlike. Nicely done.
For me, the story would have a larger impact without the last chapter.
There's your perfect, quiet, thought provoking ending.
Anyway, I thoroughly enjoyed this. Very nice characterizations and an unhurried, contemplative narration. Have a green thumb.
That push my mind to the edge of understanding.
Finished all three.
All are fantastic.
...okay, wow, honestly this was the best one of the series, if only for it being much darker than the other two.
Kudos.
7474485 What did you perceive the conflict as?
I read it as both Celestias struggling to accept that the Lunas that they had built up in their minds were false, and that they had never really understood their sisters at all. Both of them despised Nightmare Moon not for what she had actually done (for which she had suffered for a thousand years twice over, and had worked to amend), but because they felt personally betrayed by her not really being the Luna that they had chosen to believe in and love.
In the end, the local Celestia is able to come to terms with the real Luna as someone she doesn't love but doesn't deserve her hate because of it, while the alternate Celestia is able to accept that there was no fundamental difference between the Luna who was going to betray her and the Nightmare Moon who already had.
Read your trilogy. Glad that I did. Very well written.
7477492 Prequel is linked in the description, and that itself is a sequel.
So... the formerly dead Celly revives the recently killed Luna and takes her in penance to the one from her Equestria?
A brilliant story about loss and revenge.
10/10
5 Stars
Sincerely,
MorningStarTheMage
7478719 Not penance, but, since one Celestia was killed by Princess Nightmare, only fitting that she come to when it happened, and take back the Luna killed as well. Then, they both go to the revived Celestia's world and rebuild it.
7470883
The viewers. Wiz and Boomstick wouldn't be able to process the possibilities.
7480141
Seems screwy. As painful as it would be to do so much dimensional travel, trading the recently revived Luna for the original from the other timeline would be the most appropriate. Why should the essentially innocent Luna suffer to rebuild a dead world with one who is her sister, but isn't, while her murderer lives comfortably, if miserably, in the world that she belongs in? Although I suppose a few hundred years wouldn't make much difference to alicorns.
7476361
Of course, this points stands as reasonably valid even if I think the individuals would suffer a bit less the other way round.
7480461 This world's Luna was about to murder this world's Celestia and then every other living thing, and would have done so if she had not been interrupted. She isn't innocent, and belongs in a dead world far more than the Nightmare Moon who has sought atonement.
So the ending to this story makes either a another alternate universe or prevents the events post story from occurring to begin with
7480621 Well that raises some interesting questions. Would Luna have succeeded if Princess Nightmare Moon hadn't intervened? If this story takes place in the show timeline, then Celestia would have eventually overpowered Luna. Even if it doesn't take place in the show timeline, that timeline does indicate that Luna winning was not an inevitability.
Further, intent is only one part of crime. Intending to do something horrible isn't the same as following through on it. Is someone who intends to commit a crime (but has not yet) any more or less guilty than someone who has committed a crime and then atoned for it? That's one of those apples and oranges things that cannot truly be compared.
This is all further complicated by the fact that the major parties involved are all less than sane.
Easily one of my favourite series on this site.
~Have a good one.
That fucking ending. So beautiful.