Its over? NOOOOoOoOoOo

........ REVIEW TIME!

Pros
Well written
Character are likable and in-character
Superb grammar

Cons
Pointless sex scene
Discord's appearance was pointless
Chrysalis was set up at the beginning to be the villain, but when Sarah is rescued, Chrysalis is never mentioned again (Thanks to some helpful reminders, it's because she and her hive got slaughtered.... even her daughter.... holy)

The main problem lies with the fact that you keep on writing scenes that end up being pointless, that leave almost no impact on the story and are almost never mentioned again

But other then that it was a fun read and i enjoyed it despite the major flaw i listed above

5116118 i agree, like damn... i was hoping for a "Big Bad" to show up and that would lead to some truly great things, but this... it leaves me a little hollow.

5116118 you do realize that chrysalis was mercilessly impaled then beheaded by her sister right? also, thanks for the grammar compliment, me and Swirling do try to clean up after Eds abhorrent grammar practices.

There has to be a sequel, it just as to. So many unanswered question so many mysteries, and what about discord we haven't seen, or heard of him since he transformed Nim back into a Draconnequus.

Best Wedding Ever!
Also, please tell me your doing a sequel?

Bravo! I loved it.

Well shit... it always kinda sucks when a story ends, especially when there could have been so much more, but we all knew it had to end somewhere.

Little disappointed that there was no major opposition for the protagonists other than Chrysalis at the beginning. It's like you made the story start out great, but then devolved into random banter and shenanigans at the end. You pulled Discord out, but he ended up getting beaten down and resealed in no time at all, so he was easily forgotten.

The story, and its prequel, were both great. I loved reading about Sarah, Luna, and Nim's adventures, even if some of them were cutting it a bit close to copy and paste Fallout 3 script. I loved reading about the way the different people in the game reacted to Luna, and what they did because of it. However, as I stated above, you just kinda petered out at the end. You started it off with action, drama, ambiance and thrills. But your story just kinda died out at the end.

It's a shame that I enjoyed the beginning rather than the ending, because in all honesty, endings are supposed to give us closure, make the story memorable for us so we don't forget it and move on to the next thing without ever looking back. It's... well, I'm still keeping this on my favorites, but I think I'll be taking away my upvote. It started good, but it ended bad.

Anyways, hoping to see more from ya, as your stories are really great to read. As well, if you ever need any editing help, I'd be happy to help. But until next time, ciao.

Well damn. Can't take away my upvote unless I were to give you a downvote, and I really don't want to do that. This story was too good to deserve a downvote.

5116327

Yeah, that's an old fimfiction issue, and I understand, i did start with what I probably should have finished with. I think one of the problems was that I was just kind of tired of Sarah and Co, maybe if I'd taken a break from them between WM and WMR I'd have felt differently. *shrugs* Oh well, I hope you got some enjoyment out of it as a whole.

A black dress to a wedding?

That's... inappropriate.

So wait, theres no "compleated" tag any more?

And to true Ed fashion he posted it before I could edit xD

No matter, I barely had to do any editing anyway when I checked it out, BlackWindinSocks did a good job. Besides, I totally understand the whole posting before I can see it thing anyway, especially considering this is the last chapter.

Anyway, it was fun, I guess now I might go find another story and writer to edit for. If anyone is interested, tell me and I'll think about it (depends on how many people ask and if I'm interested in the story).

5116807 There is. Look at the top right corner of the story, beneath the views, comments and like/dislike ratio.

5116327 Click the upvote button again always works for me

5116531 Well wearing a white dress to a wedding is supposed to represent the bride's purity, and seeing as she's from the wasteland (and has had sex with Luna/Nim) she is hardly pure. Not that thats a bad thing, most brides really arn't when they get married.

*sighs as I reads the last words* Aw well... Time to play the waiting game... *closes the hatch to my festively decorated tank and begins blaring music from the loudspeakers mounted to the side*

WHY YOU END NOW!?

5116899 Oh! Thanks

Well that ended rather abruptly. We had a antagonist for like two chapters then he's gone, there weren't even many shenanigans in this. Come to think of it this story felt a bit rushed from the middle on, we had Discord for a few chapters messing with Nim but then got sealed away...

What a bang up wedding if I don't say so myself.

Nice final chapter... but I wouldn't put it past Luna and Nim to make up some Elixir of Life or something for Sarah so she lives as long as they do. But did Sarah and Nim ever meet Joshua???? I would have loved to see what he thought of his daughter in laws.

5116914 Already tried. Didn't work.

5117006 No prob. Don't know why they decided to take that away from where it was easy to see before.

where is discord!!!!

where is discord!!!!

That was quite the way to end it and it makes me want to go back and re-read the first one again.

5116950
That wasn't what I meant. Black is most often associated with mourning and grief.

What color do people wear at a funeral?

welp, time to start reading Absolution.

5116337
It does feel like you kinda hit a bit if burnout here, I mean, you shifted gears hard and cranked out all of those chapters for your crossover of that one Pokemon/MLP story here. I mean, the Changeling bit and Discord both sorta just... fizzled out, shoved into the background never to be seen again. And this also includes the post-Chrysalis bit with the Changelings. Still, I mean, it was a good story despite its flaws, just not an amazing one like the preceding story was.

I'd probably still put it around a 6.5 - 7.5 overall, as fuck, it was still fun to read. I'll be keeping an eye out on your other projects, Ed, so far I've thoroughly enjoyed those I've read, even if you do seem to have a lot of filler chapters that are simply there to exist in all of the stories. They're enjoyable, and really, that's all that matters.

Who knows, maybe one day you'll be revitalized on these three and we'll see another tale for them... who knows what the future holds?

5118797

Yeah, I get hit by burnout with some ideas and then switch to something else and go hard until I burn out there and then get left with trying to push things back into place *shrugs* but I keep trying and that's what matters to me. Anyways, thanks for the kind words Spacecowboy, it's nice to hear and always makes my day

..I want to see the aborted story arc in which Sarah busts up some jaws. Not a whole arc, maybe a bonus chapter..Unless you get inspired to make it an arc about dealing with the nobility.

I really want to see some guy go complete scumbag and just get sent FLYING backwards. (For example, saying that Nim belongs with her father or that Sarah belongs in a zoo.)

I take satisfaction in assholes getting grade-a blunt force trauma.

Other than that, a good ending.

5116118 Dude, Chrysalis was killed. Brutally. Along with her ENTIRE HIVE. They were SLAUGHTERED.

Felt like there could have been more and it was clipped short.As for the "filler" chapters, I think he got out certain points for later or I could be remembering them with hindsight or even blurred lines but still a great read all around. Either way I hope this mean that in following year we get a continuation of "High school Wanderings" and perhaps even "Fallout Equestria: Equestrian Wanderings". Though any bit or work you put out would be a nice way to pass the time.

Is the story done? *sigh* Want to set moar!

5116118 Sometimes, people like to call those chapters "slice of life." I for one enjoy them.

Alright. This is just awesome.
I am not realy at good terms with writing on english, so I won't make nice and grammaticaly/punctuationaly right review, but I feel like overfilled by emotions, so I just MUST say, that The Story was Damn awesome.
Both of them actualy. All the things - The characters and their development, their emotions and their acting in diffirent situations - while in first story were few moments realy close to original Fallout 3, there WAS a diffirence that make it realy interesting to read. Reactions of characters to Luna, Her and Sarah interaction and their relationship. A lot of things... and I should probably mention that I realy like the style which you had in writing - your fanfiction is realy easy to read even for not-native reader, and at the same time it is realy, realy interesting, filled with details and had... well... you had autor style, and that makes your fanfics even more awesome and amasing thing to read.
I can't say that I like sequel more than original. But at the same time, I like it no less than first - you realy got my attention with abduction ark, Nim is just so sweet as character that I can't find a words and love triangle between Sarah, Luna and Nim is realy, realy good.
Yeah.
Also, I can't agree with most of readers at the point that you should write another sequel. I think that while you "probably" passed few ideas and possible story arks, the ending is just - RIGHT. I can't explain, but it just feels like the most -right- one of all them possible.
I think that you created and properly ended one of the best fanfics on fimfiction.
Sorry for my bad english. I prefer to read, not to write.

5135367

Hey, your English is fine, I only make it through with the help of a pair of Editors, hehe. As for your thoughts, thank you so very much for taking as much time as it did to put them down in a comment, it means a LOT to me, I hope you enjoy some of my other stuff as much as you enjoyed these two stories

This has been some ride.

You did a fantastic job. You took two very different universes and tied em together almost seamlessly. While I'm not a fan of changing this much of the cannon your universe was interesting and very well constructed. As for the characters just wow. These characters really came to life and left an emotional impact on me. I loved ever moment of dialogue between our heroic trio. I'm gonna remember these three for a long time. Your re-imagining of Nightmare Moon was probably my favorite part of this entire series. The romance was spectacular and I could just feel the love eminating from these three. I'm glad I spent the time "meeting" them.

Thank you for writting both the original and the sequel. You're a damn good writer and it was an amazing journey.

Random fact of the day: The Equestrian Royal Archives are home to an estimated 8 million books, tomes, scrolls, and other various works. Approximately 23 years after Luna's return a scroll was discovered that held the knowledge of summoning cake at anytime. In response to this disturbing revelation Luna sealed the scroll away in order to protect the sanity of her sister.

A resounding 'eh' on that ending. I guess it was fitting enough. Well done otherwise.

Will you ever do a part three to this like have her exploring etc.

I have one thing to say to this story... I forgot what Nim looked like... I mean, I know she's a draconequus, but I know she's not looking like discord... She's more night-y and mystical

So sad it's over mate....

Wow... what an ending 8D
Man its been one hell of a ride I'll tell you that much. This story, and the one before it... wow, just wow.
SO MUCH AWESOME!

I love it all.
Man, good work, good job beta readers and whatnot.
and to ya'll I bid good day, and happy writings in the future! :D

PEACE OUT HOMEBOYS!

//flies away on a butterfly
GIDDYUP SUCKA!

Eh, My major gripe with Return is that it feels more like it belongs at the end of WM, than as its own, standalone story. As its own story, I find myself wanting more MEAT, but as an arc within WM, I think it makes a decent - if somewhat eclectic - ending.

5947683
She's surprisingly genocidal in some fics I read. But then again I'm not surprised, who wouldn't be after experiencing what she did?
I admire that quality about her, its awesome.

5927282 Unless the antlers are narrated as 'fuzzy', then I don't accept the caribou argument.

I liked this story wish Sarah had her weapons and gear and meet dogmeat

6313586 Truuuuuuuuuee, but I honestly think that mass murder the understatement of the century in this case.

6313577 That would be the entire point of my comment, I was pointing out that they must have had a hydroponics bay in order to have survived at all, so she should definitely have eaten some fresh food due to growing up in a vault.

Let there be cake

Even back when I was a brony I considered this sequel to be a mistake, there was still a bit more noteworthy content in the game.
Still, glad I finished it at least as to tie this loose thread.
You gave me much enjoyment back in the day.