Magical mysteries
Cicadas whined overhead, invisible in the upper branches of the library. Twilight shielded her eyes from the bright sun with one hoof. She wanted to step out of the sunlight, back into the tree’s shade, but she was still waiting to welcome the mayor to the library.
The mayor didn’t come to the library as often as Twilight thought she would have. The library was a long way from Town Hall, all the way at the far end of Main Street, out on the edge of town, past where the cobblestones gave way to dirt and mud and then to just grass. It was a funny place for a library, now that Twilight thought about it. It’s not a library.
The mayor still hadn’t looked at her except in an under-the-eyebrows way that didn’t invite talking. She kept frowning at Rarity, who had the mayor by her left forehoof and was leaning in close to tell her something. Sometimes she looked at Fluttershy and Applejack, clustered together on her right, and then down at the hard-baked dirt at her hooves, shoved up in blocks by the tree’s roots and then cracked by the sun. She didn’t look at Rainbow or Pinkie at all. The two police mares with her studied Twilight guardedly. They kept glancing at the Element of Magic around her neck, flashing in the noon sun. Probably it intimidated them. Twilight had hung it on a string that Rarity had thrown out in the trash, just until she could find a proper gold chain for it. It’s plastic, and probably also from Rarity’s trash.
Rarity tried to lean in to the mayor to say something else, but was interrupted by a particularly self-important cicada, and they both stood back upright and waited it out, Rarity cocking her head and aiming her eyes up above everypony, the mayor looking relieved. It was hard for anypony to get anything said, between the cicadas, the flies, and the mad burning sun, but nopony but Rarity looked like talking anyway. The police mares just glanced up at the sky when anypony looked at them: Can’t talk; too hot.
Twilight finally stepped back into the shade. A few flies that had been circling there settled on her flanks, and she flicked her tail at them ineffectually. She felt the restlessness she felt whenever all the Elements were together. Probably the mayor had a mission for them.
“You know it’s for her own good,” the mayor said to Fluttershy and Applejack.
“Her good? I’m the one whose business is suffering!” Rarity exclaimed. She glared at Twilight.
Twilight was going to go over and see what Rarity was so upset about, but she saw the sharp look in her eyes. So instead Pinkie hopped over, stood up, and spread out both forehooves to encompass all four ponies. “Aw, don’t look so glum! You know who needs a party?” She poked one hoof at each of the four somehow. “You do!”
“Pinkie,” Twilight said, “leave them alone for a minute. They have something to discuss.” Twilight spoke authoritatively, but she was secretly glad for Pinkie’s irreverence. Pinkie didn’t over-analyze things or worry about what other ponies would think. So often she did the things that Twilight secretly wanted to, but couldn’t. That’s why Twilight invented her.
“And all that screaming last night,” Rarity went on. “It was simply dreadful.” Rarity feels sorry for herself for having to listen to Twilight being attacked.
Applejack gave Rarity a hard thin-lipped look, then leaned in towards Fluttershy, as if shielding her. “It ain’t your fault, Sugar cube.”
Fluttershy pawed at the ground. “If you say so.” A cloud of gnats circled her head, but all she did was blink once. She thinks it's her fault.
“Well, she can’t stay here anymore,” the mayor said, “after what those two did last night.”
Twilight realized they must be talking about the two stallions who’d tried to get into the library after dark last night. “It’s okay,” she said. “They didn’t get any of the books. Then Rainbow chased them away, all the way to the Everfree Forest.” No she didn’t; she isn’t real.
“You bet I did!” Rainbow said, swooping overhead. “You shoulda seen ‘em run with their tails pulled up under their asses!”
“Rainbow!” Twilight said.
“What? They did! Served ‘em right, too!”
“Language, Rainbow,” Twilight said. Still, it was hard to hold back a grin. Sometimes she wished she could say just what she wanted to other ponies like Rainbow did.That’s why she invented her.
“You don’t have to do this, honey,” Applejack told Fluttershy. “We got room at the farm...”
“No,” Fluttershy said, “I want to.”
“It ain’t your fault!”
Fluttershy looked over to Twilight and smiled weakly, like she had the night she’d said, I want to be friends and taught Twilight the Magic of Friendship. It gave Twilight a feeling in her stomach like eating Mexican, both satisfying and ominous. Now Fluttershy, Fluttershy was a foolish and vulnerable pony. Twilight had to look out for her.
“Come on, Twilight,” Fluttershy said. “I need you to give me a hand—I mean, a hoof—with, with Angel.”Trying to go along with Twi’s pony fantasy.
“Fluttershy, I’d love to, but you know the Princess said I have to look after the library.”
Rarity gave a tiny lady-like snort. “Which princess was that? Seems we have a new princess every week around here.”Seriously, Hasbro.
Twilight laughed. That was funny for some reason, though she couldn’t remember why.
Fluttershy herded Twilight away from Rarity and the library. “Spike wants to show he can take care of it by himself,” she said. “He told me so. Please, Twilight.”Dragons aren’t real.
Mayor Mare laid a forehoof on Fluttershy’s shoulder, then turned away. The police mares just watched with folded forelegs. One spat on the ground. Fluttershy was her friend, so Twilight let her guide her, away from the library, down the grassy path on the edge of town that led to her cottage. Rainbow and Pinkie came too, sometimes zooming ahead or behind. Fluttershy just walked. Fluttershy never flew. She has no wings. And her name isn't Fluttershy.
“You remember this place, don’t you?” Fluttershy said when they arrived. At first it looked long and square like a trailer, but little details filled themselves in one by one: the window lattices that looked like plastic but were in fact a highly polished exotic wood; the hulking brown square that was once a recycling bin but, she could now see, had been cleverly converted into a chicken coop; the green that had looked like mossy shingles — how could she have mistaken it? — was a fat thatched roof with grass growing on top. It’s a trailer.
“It isn’t very big, but I have a little room where I can put out a cot for you. We’ll have fun, okay, Twilight?”
“Hey, what about me?” Rainbow said.
“You can sleep on a cloud, silly!” Pinkie said.
“There’s a tub in the bathroom, it’s full-sized, and I’ve got a rubber duckie and soap that bubbles, and we can get you all washed up,” Fluttershy said. Twilight is filthy from living in a tree.
Twilight looked at the cottage, and stamped one hind leg uneasily. “Fun?” That feeling like Mexican food was back. Once she wanted more from Flutters.
“Fun,” Fluttershy said solemnly. The look on her face reminded Twilight again of that time before: I want to be friends.
Twilight rubbed her jaw thoughtfully.
I just want to be friends. That’s what Fluttershy told Twilight.
Something buzzed behind one of her eyes, like it was trying to get out. Twilight knew that feeling, and how to deal with it. She squeezed her eyes shut and searched in her head for another buzzing that could match it and drive it out. She makes stuff up to fix the truth.
She opened her eyes. “It’s okay,” she said. “Everything’s going to be fine, Fluttershy.” Because the second buzzing was one that had come to her last night, while Dash was chasing those naughty colts away, and was what she had wanted to tell Rarity and the Mayor. It was that now she was a princess too! She made that up while being attacked, to cope.
Now that she thought about it, it was funny that nopony had asked her about the wings that now lay folded tightly on her flanks. They were probably too worried to notice. Oh, but if she showed Fluttershy that now they could be together in that bright blue sky... Maybe she would take to the sky, too! They would swoop and dive about each other, and Fluttershy would smile like she used to, before...
She bounded up onto the low roof of Fluttershy’s chicken coop. From there it was a quick jump onto the roof of the cottage itself. The yard spread out below her like the bottom of a sea, a mere boundary of no particular importance now that the real world of three dimensions was open to her. She spread her new wings and crouched. “Watch this!” The wind threw her mane over one shoulder and ran its fingers over her face and through her feathers.
Down in the depths below, Fluttershy held both hooves to her mouth. “Twilight! Come down from there!”
“Go for it, Twi!” Rainbow shouted from above.
But Fluttershy had fallen to her… knees?... and was hiding her face in her hooves, sobbing, just barely audible: “please don’t. please don’t. you can’t… i mean, ponies can’t fly. i’m sorry. i’m sorry but they can’t. ponies can’t fly.”
Twilight climbed down carefully from the roof and nuzzled Fluttershy until she looked up. Twilight reached out to stroke away Fluttershy’s tears. She could see them glisten but couldn’t feel the wetness through her hooves. She wished she had some way to cheer her up. Fluttershy’s eyes were large and unfocused like those of a horse that had just been broken too hard. But who would break a horse? Twilight squeezed her eyes shut. Humans would.
She saw the princesses in her mind, prancing by one by one across a dark background. Celestia first, shining like a candle in the dark, the oldest, the one who made them all possible because once you knew her, you knew that she had to exist, that a thing couldn’t be that perfect without being real, too. The others had all followed after her, then: Luna, whispering Twilight’s name in the dark, cast from the reverse side of Celestia’s mold, a cold blue glimmer next to Celestia's burning glare. Cadence, not shining like a flame but glowing like a smile, nothing like Celestia or Luna but somepony that anyone who loved them both would recognize, the third dimension that grew out from the first two, that you couldn’t imagine until you’d been there and couldn’t stop seeing after. And then she saw herself, grown, she’d been just a filly until now but hadn’t known it, and now she was graceful and desirable and had some great power that drew ponies to her and that she could control if only she knew what it was.
“It’s okay, Fluttershy!” she said, opening her eyes. “Everything’s going to be just fine!” And it would be. Fluttershy, Twilight realized, was going to be a princess, too! They would all be princesses!
Twilight galloped off down the path back towards the library to find Rarity and let her know. She would be so excited! Fluttershy ran along after her, because Fluttershy never flew.
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Joss Whedon, eh?
The premise sounds silly, yet I can't help but notice that 'dark' tag...
Then again, it IS supposed to be emulating Joss "Kill everyone you love" Whedon...
The description has me intrigued.
3663044 and Cormac McCarthy. Dark would not even begin to describe HIS work.
3663051
Actually I have no idea who that is.
3663054
The guy responsible for
The Road.
No Country for Old Men
and
Blood Meridian.
Look up those titles on Wikipedia. Read the plot descriptions. You will understand.
I only have really the faintest idea of exactly what was going on (some sort of loop or Skinner box?), but I do know that it was excellently written and I enjoyed it. Not quite close enough to be mistaken for Cormac McCarthy, but the closest I've yet seen.
3663086
OH
It's written well--which is just another way of saying it is written by Bad Horse--but I don't like it, I don't think. It's just that--I don't believe you. This is not how it goes.
I can admire it as an exercise but instead of catharsis that something [sad] and [dark] might produce, or the persistent nightmares something [sad] and [dark] written by Bad Horse might produce, all I get is a sense of annoyance and distaste, as if hearing a malicious rumor I know to be false.
So. Um. Sorry.
It's... a little confusing at first. Then you read it again and everything gets clearer. But it's still somewhat fuzzy. I get what you're doing here, and it's beautifully written, but... I don't know, it's just so hard to tell what exactly is happening at any given time.
3663097 3663312 I added commentary in the text, in white font that will show up if you mouse over it.
3663247 Sorry, I should have marked it NSFG.
I could say that I hate this story. I could say that Twilight Sparkle is a bigger Mary Sue than Bela Swan. I could say that cancelling Firefly was the smartest decision Fox ever made.
But none of those things would be true. I don't hate this story; I just found it boring and disappointing. Twilight certainly isn't as bad as Bela; it's just that most of the people on this site want to have sex with her, so they unintentionally write her as a Possession Sue. Her new pair of wings only make this more obvious. Oh, and Firefly isn't awful or really great either; people only say it's amazing because they have a romanticized idea of the seasons that we never got.
I hate that I'm only now realizing that Twilight becoming super best buddies with her friends isn't relatable to me in the slightest. I hate that there aren't really any fandoms like ours, that every other show like it is just a drop in the bucket compared to FiM. And I hate that Knighty can basically do whatever he darn well pleases, and anything I could suggest to try and change his mind would probably end with me getting banned.
None of those are really your fault, but this story sure didn't help me forget them. If anything it just reminded me, so that's why I decided to downvote it. It put me back in the bad mood I had earlier today.
3663338
First you might want to fix:
Also, now that I saw the white text...well, I'd say you channeled Cormac McCarthy pretty well, but...goddamn if I don't want to forget this story happened.
3663339 I think you commented on the wrong story. You're looking for something with ponies. There are no ponies here.
I was wondering what that Human tag was for...it was really fishy...
This is actually a pretty great story. Then again, I'm a sucker for these "figure-out-what-it-means" stories, so my opinion might rate with a grain of sand.
I think this has way too much meta that don't really help the story. The whole Whedon angle could have been dropped or ignored, and it tries to emulate Cormac, but there is no apparent point to the darkness, so it falls flat.
Also, I read it first without seeing the hidden text, and thought it involved Twilight being deluded after being witness to a murder (due to the flies around the crime scene). The thing is, the "real" version isn't much more plausible than that, and the intentional obfuscation of details didn't add much to the story, plus I have a thing against stories that require external input to be understood.
Also, the line about Mexican food annoys and intrigues me in equal measures, but was probably the most interesting thing of the fic.
3663339
I don't think you actually read this story.
>>Bad Horse
That's pretty helpful. I didn't catch the subtext about how it was a tree and not a building.
3663485
Oh, I never downvote a story unless I finish it. Though I suppose there's no way of proving to you that I read it.
3663515
Try reading it AGAIN.
This time catch the subtext and watch your mind implode.
Like a detailed photography exhibit of a famine, this is not what I wanted.
I can't criticsize the writing itself; you craft is flawless. I won't critique the theme; it's a valid theme.
But I will note that I'm left with no sense of your purpose? I wonder, 'why did you bother telling me this story?'
I could say that you wanted me to feel something, but I'm left unsure of what I'm supposed to feel. It's tragic. Fine. But it's not unexpectedly tragic. It's just a snippet of someone's life that has no meaning. I... oddly, as I'm fairly forgiving... left with no care or concern for these people. Even though I can feel sympathy for them, I cannot create space in my heart for them, as they are yet strangers to me.
Maybe that's it? These are not the ponies (or even people) I know, so who are they? What do these events mean, to me? You, as the writer, did not answer that. I, the reader, did not either.
So is this a story that failed to engage me, or a story meant to engage someone else?
I don't think it was a bad story, but I sort of have to agree with 3663772 in that I don't really get why it exists. It is a thing, but I've read other stories about it all being imaginary.
It isn't downvote worthy, but I didn't really feel like I cared enough for it to upvote it either. It just kind of is. *shrugs*
I did like the cover image, though.
My tendency to randomly highlight text as I read served me well here though.
And then it turns out the whole thing is being imagined by an autistic boy looking into a snowglobe.
And then Bob Newhart wakes up.
i use dark theme
... this may have ruined it for me
3664096 Rats. I was afraid of that.
3664018
Am I a pony dreaming I am a snowglobe, or am I a snowglobe dreaming I'm a plate of sashimi?
3664391 Just stay asleep until I can finish this sashimi. Mmm.
And so, my habit of highlighting the words I'm reading comes back to bite me.
I didn't understand it without reading the clues, then going back to read the tags and look at the picture again (because I am incapable of doing things in order and a lot of times I don't read the description/look at the picture anyways) and then fully reading the plot for Normal Again. Even then, I was still confused by some parts (of course, I'm hardly the most discerning reader). It took a good 10/15 minutes longer for all the clues to sink in.
The revelation was worth the effort though. I'm not going to complain about the perceived pointlessness of the story because sometimes that's just how life works out.
EDIT: if there's one thing this story really succeeds in, it's that I was much more deliberate in my decision to upvote and favorite this story in comparison to almost all of your other stories.
I wrote a story like this once (Gharry Pony), so I feel ya. Sometimes an idea demands the exorcism of life and won't be suppressed by normal means. Mine was less of a subversion, though: for all that it was more gruesome, it had more hope and more justice in a sense.
Here's your trouble—too many veiled specifics. The whole REAL story here is made up of tangible details that are specifically hidden from the reader. There's too many of them and they're all hidden, so the story becomes a puzzle with each discovery both unpleasant and only loosely related to the next. I appreciate the artistry of the new alicorn actually being a human Tragedy Sue with a series of hints highlighting how every detail is a new horror or despair, but there's no justice for anyone or anypony here, including the reader.
And that's not a picture of the world, even a world like Twilight's. It's a picture from INSIDE Twilight's human world, and as an author you can do more, and you didn't. Particularly with the white asides you've made it plain that you buy Twilight's side of all this completely, and that's what's so heartbreaking about Fluttershy's love here. It really does mean something but Twilight has it mean nothing. Maybe that's why Shy has wings that she doesn't use, though of COURSE then Twilight has to have wings too which she amusingly isn't good at using except when she is…
Maybe Shy is the only real one. Maybe it's Shy and Rarity with Rarity about to abandon RL!Twilight in frustration, and Rarity busts the fantasy wide open with an out of context meltdown, suddenly referencing human things but stubbornly still viewed (by the narration) as a unicorn getting in misadventures that it's Twilight's job to fix as the Pony Sue? That was a big opportunity to telegraph the underlying concept while denying it.
Hell, you could've capped it off with Twi napping under Fluttershy's wing (Shy behaving fearfully) and then brushing Twi's mane out of her eyes with a gentle 'hand' for a gutshot on the last word, and had it work out more complicated than that because the gesture of love tells a conflicting story. I don't think you really reached for it here. To some extent this story is low hanging fruit because you did not explore the validity or meaning of Shy's feelings, even in the absence of her ability to help.
I realize I'm calling this low hanging fruit on FIMfiction, and I'm ashamed of myself for not contextualizing it better—I guess I just expect much more from your thoughtful self
I got it right around the first misplaced hand/hoof the tags helped. The only questions I had was whether Twilight was Pony Twilight or Human Twilight-- not that it matters-- and why are Pinkie and Rainbow dead-- not that it matters.. Of course those questions may be answered in the white text... I'll have to go back and see.
All I really got out of it was a general sense of ennui (which only makes me sound pretentious). My only real thought is that you could have strengthened the contrast between the beginning and end, making the former feel more pony and the latter more obviously human.
Edit: And that solved those questions.
Final thoughts: Things were pretty ambiguous-- not that I'm one who can complain about such things-- but it all worked out in the end. I don't see why everyone else is so negative about it.
sadly everything has a reason
Well, this is...
Something.
It's uh...
Yes.
Anyways, my only problem is the assertion that Twilight 'made up' these characters and places. That's not how these kinds of mental illnesses work. It's not a question of making something up, that implies an action on their part. I mean, it obviously does come from their mind, but not in the sense of 'I'm here to fill a role that you can't.' I mean, people are known to escape into fantasy to escape from a trauma, but you've heavily implied that this isn't new, so one can assume that Twilight has a mental illness, which, again, this is not how they work.
I can respect the art, but given the current cultural perspective on mental illness, I feel like art must be used to inform the subject.
3663086
Uh? The Road is not that dark...
I mean, it's post-apocalyptic, and many, many people die, but the note it ends on is more hopeful than I've seen in just about any other post-apocalypse movie for a while. If The Road is dark, I'd hate to see what you think of Fallout. The raiders must have you in conniptions! Nevermind the Pitt...
Excellently written sadfic you have here. Kinda proves that featured one-shots come about through the authors current followers liking a certain genre. Regardless,a unique well written idea that elicits actual sympathy, fantastic. More of these please?
There is a special place in hell for those who suck all the wonder out of Peter Pan, Harry Potter and MLP and explain it away with "it's just a confused (read "mad") person trying to escape into a magical place". Now please excuse me, I'll re-watch "Sucker Punch". At least that movie had a dragon.
"When critics disagree, the artist is in accord with himself." -- Oscar Wilde
Hang in there, Horse!
3664927 That's not a bad idea, focusing the end on Fluttershy. I think I still don't know what this story is about. I thought it was about dealing with mental illness, but it isn't really, because I'm more interested in Twilight's feelings than in Fluttershy's. And it isn't a realistic portrayal of mental illness.
Now I think I may have been more drawn in by the notion of Twilight having so many reasons to pity herself, but being more concerned about everyone else. She might be a metaphor for my mother. My mom is very religious, and this governs her life and warps the way she sees everything, and keeps interfering in her relationship with me. Nonetheless, her religious fanaticism seems to make her happier, and a nicer person, than I am.
3664099
Likewise, but I still liked it. Didn't get why people were confused at first though.
Something can be unsettling without having to ahhe any great resolution, reminds me of some of Neil Gaimans very short fiction.
3666429
Hm. Given what you've said, perhaps an alternate title might be "Those Who do not Hear the Music" as in "Those who do not hear the music think the dancers mad." It's Nietzsche--a bit of a misquote, but still, Nietzsche, man!
Hm. I like it as a story, in that the subtlety of the human reality is masterfully kept to an undertone, keeping a lightness in narrative despite the very obviously dark underpinings of the tone. I also like that it wasn't about forcing Twilight to accept reality as a human, in that I feel that it would have detracted from the sadness of it all.
It made me squirm to read it, but that's not a fault, considering the rating and genre. Well done, sir.
I had a lot to say about this before, but I don't know anymore...
I will say that I was sincerely frightened when I realized what was going on in this story.
I was confused the first time I read it, but the second time I read it you had added those highlighted tags that make the story still subtle, but now comprehensible. I really liked it, the story has a feeling of quiet desperation that really draws you in, and makes you wonder what else that Twilight's world is like.
I figured out what was going on, with the picture, Fluttershy not flying, and
. But I'm glad I read the white text, the white text is written like i did not get any of it at all. Seriously Hasbro
Also I'm very concerned about your confession about some-one wanting to rape her and putting a spin on it, that's not a 'meta Christian' thing. I hope you simply don't know the whole story since that is not healthy in any way. I can't say too much else constructive, not my cup of tea but this wasn't hald bad. Keep it up.
3666429
Then may I suggest:
Taking the metaphor even further? Maybe in Twilight's eyes, it was Discord who attacked her the night before. She'd been hoping that he would settle down when he started hanging out with Fluttershy, but since that isn't the case, she's now got no choice but to round up the other Elements of Harmony, track him down, and reseal him in stone.
'Cause structurally, I'd call what you've got here just short of half a story. And it's nowhere near as devastating as it could be if you wanted to follow the concept all the way out as far as it might go.
And thanks for the grammar and punctuation: I've never managed more than a few pages of any Cormac McCarthy book 'cause I feel like I'm back in college trying to translate something out of Greek...
Mike
This still makes no sense to me, even with the white text. What is it even about? I just don't get it.
I'll give this story a look and review. The comments suggest that this will be interesting.
God, this is fantastic. Need to be working on stats, but I wanted to take a quick break for a story and this was on my mind for some reason.
I've never read Cormac McCarthy, and I don't know that I'd particularly tag Joss Whedon on this. And I'll admit, I didn't catch everything you were doing. Took me about halfway to pick up on the human side of it (at the point where, IMO, it becomes painfully obvious – with "Fluttershy" making the error and everyone suddenly using their forehooves for things). At that point, it all became pretty clear, including the situation with Rainbow and Pinkie, which I can see readers missing, because it's particularly subtle and I think you really have to be paying attention to their use in characterization for Twilight. A bit like painting with whitespace, in that their absence from other perspectives isn't glaring. I think I figured that one out about when you first mentioned "Fluttershy" never flying.
What I never caught was the role "Fluttershy" played in all this, and the implication of what happened the night before the story. Though I never properly connected the dots on Twilight living in an actual, honest-to-goodness tree since it was narratively distant by the time I figured out what you were doing.
So, there's a response to your question about how the reading went. Now for my own commentary.
The first thing that really jumped out to me with this story was the detail at the start: the cicadas, the hard-baked earth, etc. I'm usually not a fan of heavy detail (I'm kind of in awe of Skywriter's ability to do it well, without detracting from the story), but here it did a lot for setting the mood in my mind. Having lived a long time in Albuquerque, my brain processes this sort of summerish imagery very naturally. And I hate summer.
I also really liked how you closed it out. I was desperately hoping that you wouldn't end it on some cheap punch line (like I so often feel compelled to do), and you didn't. Of course you didn't—you're a better writer than that. The Princess Fluttershy beat serves an analogous role, but it's unexpected enough that it felt more organic and less authorially intrusive. And it doesn't have a proper ending; and it shouldn't. It's not a story that ends—or begins, really.
Finally, I want to say that I'm very glad for the white-text annotations. I'd actually considered mentioning to you that the paragraph spacing on your story was screwed up, until finding out that there was a reason for it. But getting the extra layer relative to what I missed about "Fluttershy" and the attackers was good. That's really kind of the heart of the whole thing, but I think it's also probably the hardest bit to catch in a first reading (or then again, maybe I'm prejudiced because it's just what I happened to miss).
I feel like I should really comment at greater length. There are so many things about this story I loved. The bit about who breaks horses. The fact that so much of the pathos is played so subtly (really nice in the mawkish realm of fanfiction). I suspect this is second only to Skywriter's "Heretical Fictions" in making me feel so uncomfortably inadequate about my own writing—but I don't particularly mind today. This was too pretty for me to get worked up about something like that.
As for this being unworthy of you, I've got to disagree with Ghost on this one, though we've got different tolerances for stuff like this. I really need to spend time working through your back catalog, but this is definitely one of my favorites among what I've read. I don't particularly care that there's not much point to it all (in much the same way that I didn't care too much about the lack of narrative direction in bits of Obiter Dicta). This piece is beautiful, and deserves to be read on the strength of that alone.
So twilight I'm assuming had gone through some trauma and now she's made up this ponies to cope with life?
Aww
Poor Twilight
When I first saw the pic I thought it was Twilight being an alicorn and outliving all her friends. I've read one like that before. It was really sad. Then I started reading and the erm hooves thing I'm just like ohhhhh
Then ib rag the white stuff and everything cane into focus.
Aaaanyways
Great story!
I regret to say this Mr. Horse, but you are a monster.
A literary monster
A bona fide literary monster.
Toodles ^.~
3744780 Did you read it twice? I guess you're a glutton for punishment.
3745380
Mmm... yummy nummy.
On the day it was posted.
Third time was far less traumatic, yet still agonizingly far from mundane.