It's Flurry Heart's seventh birthday, and her parents have told her she can have anything she asks for (so long as she eats all of her crystal veggies, which she did). They expected something extravagant, but obvious - a fancy dress, a room full of candy, maybe even her own little throne between theirs. What they did not expect was the one thing she wants more than anything for her special day. Princess Flurry Heart... wants a pony of her very own.

[EDIT]: Wow, on the front page in less than a day! This is amazing!

Ballpoint Smudge has one job. It's not an easy one, but it's one he's determined to do to the best of his ability. The only problem is that as soon as he meets Twilight Sparkle, everything he's ever learned about princesses goes flying out of the window. He was expecting her to be regal, haughty and bossy. Instead she's warm, friendly and welcoming. Perhaps she's genuinely a nice pony? Nah. It's got to be a test.

Based on an idea by Ambrose Bierce, from his excellent Devil's Dictionary. Just look up 'Insurance'.

Featured at 12.30 GMT on 15/06/2016. I am very pleased indeed about that.

This story is a sequel to Derpy Intentionally A Portal Gun

Or, Derpy Accidentally a Presidential Campaign

Due to a rather strange clause in electoral process added by Thomas Jefferson, ponies turn out to actually be a large voting bloc in the American Presidential primary.

Upon discovering Equestria, the current candidates begin campaigning in Equestria.

It doesn't go as well as you'd expect.

This is the worst thing I have ever read
--Theodore Roosevelt

The Tasty Treat becomes a successful restaurant, despite not having the three-hoof rating that makes all the restaurants in Restaurant Row successful. The Queen of Cuisine, Zesty Gourmand, will not let this stand without criticism.

Unfortunately for her, somepony else will not let her flawed method of critiquing restaurants go unpunished. And he's not holding back anything. No way in Hell, especially in his own kitchen.

Spoilers for Season 6 Episode 12

Random Oneshot Idea that just popped in my head.

Contains vulgar language and verbal bashing (Judging from the cover art, you can tell why).

A new restaurant has opened Ponyville with one really interesting attraction. And as we all know, there is one language friends, foes,and all races speak: Dance. Watch as all the ponies and characters you know and love show off their dancing skills (or lack of) in front of everypony!

One-shot.

Featuring: Princess Luna, Celestia, Cadance, Shining Armor, Braeburn, Little Strongheart, Vinyl Scratch, Octavia, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Spitfire, Soarin'.

In combination of "The Birds and the Changelings" and "Know Your Mare"

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kISjRO3L2U]

Guarding a library at night is one thing,
but waking up a princess that's over ten times your size...

Author's (strange) inspiration: I'm kinda hittin' a brick wall with my other stories, so here's one that came to me during a late at night browsing of pictures.

“Anything that happens, happens.
Anything that, in happening, causes something else to happen, causes something else to happen.
Anything that, in happening, causes itself to happen again, happens again.
It doesn't necessarily do it in chronological order, though.”
- Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless

Twilight and Minuette discuss Starlight Glimmer's timeline disruptions.

Twilight just wishes the conversation had happened in chronological order.

Yesterday, Dinky Hooves learned a new word. Today, she's going to share that new word with her two best friends at school.

Fluttershy really should've watched her mouth a little more.

[Based on you-all-know-which scene from S6E11: "Flutter Brutter". Thanks to Tayman and themaskedferret for pre-reading.]

Something is causing the pegasi to follow an irresistible urge to hug their ground-bound cousins, leaving Ponyville foundering in a mildly annoying emergency. Twilight Sparkle ventures into the no-more-dangerous-than-usual town in a desperate attempt to solve the cutesy crisis and finally get her study time back.

Inspired by shortskirtsandexplosions' story Herald.

Celestia comes to visit Twilight and Starlight after Hearth's Warming Eve festivities die down for the night.

Starlight, figuring she'll never have a chance like this again, asks the immortal alicorn about what went down all those years ago.

Reading by TheArchitect!

Second reading by _NeighlyReads_!