• Member Since 8th Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen 46 minutes ago


Hunter, fisher, father, son, husband, rescue Greyhound owner, and occasional fanfic writer.


Selected miscellaneous works by TheLastBrunnenG from Thirty Minute Pony Stories, all clop-free.

Apple Tart Surprise - Applejack is frustrated and feelin' frisky. Is that ever a good combination? {AJ x OCs. Saucy!}

Deep Into That Darkness Peering - Only one thing could possibly make Fluttershy brave the Everfree at night. {ZecoraShy adventure.}

Sigh and Smile - Fluttershy hopes and prays for just one more good day. {FlutterDash / DashFire. Rejected Flight Suit chapter.}

I Think That I Shall Never See - Some places can feel alive, but only if we're there to give them life. {Epilogue to Flight Suit, Luna's Librarian, and Rustic.}

Familiar Demons - On the Appleoosan Plains, four ponies shudder as they recall the Headless Horse. {Western suspense.}

Try Honesty as a Last Resort - Celestia's unicorn lover isn't who anyone expected, and nopony's happy about it. {Rarity x Celestia}

Elements of Bureaucracy - Town under attack by a 50-foot monster? Call the Elements! But leave a security deposit first. {comedy}

Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking - Appointing Luna to preside over Sentencing Court may not have been the best idea. {comedy}

The Blossoming of Annuals - Fluttershy keeps this Pinkie Promise every year, even when nopony expects her to. {sad FlutterPie}

Sundown on a Winding Road - Granny Smith and Granny Pie work to get their granddaughters together. {ApplePie, plus... GrannyGranny?!?}

The Kind Wife - Fluttershy and Luna are happily married! That's what Shy keeps telling herself. She has to. {sad LunaShy}

Forest Elder - You can bet on strange encounters anytime you take a trip through the Everfree on Nightmare Night. {Dragon Age crossover]

These stories are one-shots which do not fit into other story collections such as If the Flight Suit Fits, Luna's Librarian, The Rustic & The Romantic, or Egghead and Featherbrain.

All chapters originally written as separate entries for flash-fic blog Thirty Minute Pony Stories (TMP). I highly recommend a visit to TMP if you're looking for some of the best 1000-word gems in pony fiction. Many thanks to TMP for inspiring me to write!

Yes, the collection's title is a LEXX reference. That might be as close as I come to penning a Lexx / MLP crossover.

Chapters (12)
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Comments ( 77 )

Random collection of short stories?
Commence read.

Ugh, I'm running out of room in my "Stories I Am Legit Addicted To" box! :flutterrage:

On to-read list because I never expected to see a Lexx reference on here.

Go for it! People who follow Thirty Minute Ponies may have seen some of these before, though the ones here have been edited and in some cases expanded.

I'm still squee-ing after seeing my name in lights like that. :twilightblush:

Didn't care for the Fire and Water seasons as much, and the last season on Earth wasn't my favorite by far, but it was still Lexx. As I told someone via PM recently, I don't plan on writing any MLP / Lexx crossovers - they'd be too short:

Lexx: "I see a planet, Stan. "
Stan: "Great! Who's living there? Hot love slaves? Frisky plant-women?"
Lexx: "No, just pretty colorful ponies, Stan."
Kai: "We should avoid this place, Stanley. The dead do not 'smile, smile, smile'."
Stan: "Ugh... Now I know we're in the Dark Zone. Okay, Lexx, blow it up and eat it. Wake me when you find some space babes."
Lexx: "Anything you say, Stan."

Kind of sad, really - Even the happiest of places ultimately will be abandoned.


*For lack of better emoticons.

Really really sad.

These seem to be somewhat more melancholy than the rest of your work.

Not worse for it just different.

That last line: still great.

That goddamn tortoise.


Ah man, this as hilarious! What is it about your writing that makes me stay up so late to devour it all? Poor AJ... :applejackconfused:
Or possibly lucky AJ, depending on what kind of tools Pinkie has... :pinkiecrazy::ajsmug:


Indeed. The ponies all went on to happier places, to varying degrees, but some things... just aren't forever.

So far, I suppose they are. There are some funnier chapters coming, I promise. The only things that won't eventually make it here are the stories that just plain flopped.

Hehehe! I was hoping for that. I wanted that last line to be sort of gutwrenching as you feel the depth of Falcon's disgust, and just plain silly as you realize what's got Falcon in such a snit to begin with.

Either way, AJ's in for a loooong night.

And how do my stories trap you? Easy, like so:
"Oh look, another chapter. It's only 1000 words, it'll just take a minute. Well, that was fun. But..."
"Oh look, another chapter. It's only 1000 words, it'll just take a minute. Well, that was fun. But..."
"Oh look, another chapter. It's only 1000 words, it'll just take a minute. Well, that was fun. But..."

For a tree, you weep. Applejack and Bloomberg would be proud!

dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before

I was ‘bout as horny as a ten-peckered owl.

I lost my shit at this point
so glad I'm the only one home, that was too damn funny XD

Commence read.

Very deep. Like the imagery brought on by this chapter.

Didn't think Fluttershy could be that devious. Or you, for that matter. Here is your vanity plate.


Ouch, that's a zinger. Very nicely done.

One quibble, though: people (or ponies) don't usually write in dialect. If AJ were reciting this aloud to Celestia, it would be perfectly in character, but as a letter, it just seems a bit odd. AJ's a smart pony; she wouldn't deliberately leave off terminal Gs, etc., when writing simply to imitate how she pronounces words when speaking.

That was marvelous. :rainbowlaugh: (Admittedly, It probably helps that I handle a lot of the contracts our office processes. Stuff like this cracks me up.)

She's dictating it to Spike, and Spike is transcribing it accurately, just like Twilight taught him to. :trixieshiftleft::trixieshiftright:

Ah, the bad old unrequited seeking comfort in 'close-enough'. That stings, alright.


After their next tryst, Rarity discovers the letter, and angrily storms back to Ponyville to confront the four:

"Did you perhaps consider that I know exactly what I'm doing, what I've gotten myself into? Did any of you think even once that maybe I'm the one using her? That just maybe she isn't the only one whose intended has been snatched away?"

It just comes to me, I can't help it. But now it's decided: there's going to be Lunity as a sequel/side-story to my next Twilestia. :pinkiehappy:

I was using lines from The Raven for half a dozen prompt titles in a row.

Loved that line from Heathers! I've been waiting to use it for ages and I could only hear it in Applejack's voice.

Thanks! I tried to pull off a mostly descriptive piece, with zero dialogue and almost no narrative. Hope it worked.

ZecoraShy has some interesting forest-and-woodland-creature dynamics to it. How much would it surprise Shy's friends if they knew that not only was she shacking up with their local Zebra sorceress, but that she was willing to brave the Everfree alone at night to do it?

True. I tried to keep her from writing phonetically (Ah / Mah / Yer / Thar for I / My / Your / There) but still have her write it in her own way. Her response would be, "That there's the way I was taught, and that's the way I'm writin' it, y'all hear?"

This almost became a longer story series on its own, where the Elements were a villain-smasher-for-hire group.

Oh, that's beautiful - that response is exactly what I can hear Rarity saying. That quote is almost a one-paragraph sequel all by itself. And if you write RariLuna, Lunity, MoonRare, whatever it is - count me in! That would be delicious, especially coming from your pen.


I feel like I should point out that it's not in quotation marks, meaning that no-one is speaking, but I won't. That would be terribly picky.

I'll just say I agree that this probably shouldn't have been in dialect.


NOTE: Rewards are not required for services rendered by the Elements of Harmony. Tips are appreciated.

Seems like a good idea to tip.

That formletter was awesome. Goes to show how often they get deployed that they had to get such a form thing going ^^

Right, it's not in quotation marks because it's not dialog, it's a letter.

2093451 so much love for gothic poetry XD
and how do you find these quotes?
I someday want to fit in an obscure firefly/galactica quote into a fic sometime (possibly when I have the ability to write fic XD)

Commence read.

Ah. A trope story?

“Jaywalking? No, they go straight to the Moon. Come with me, I’ll teach you the spell.”


God damn that was deep, and rather sad (and happy in its own way).


Commence read.


Squirrel Girl = OP!


You're probably right. That's just how I pictured her writing - in partial dialect (thinkin' an' feelin') but not phonetically (Ah fergot mah suppah.)

Depends on if you ever expect a return visit. If so, tips = appreciated.

Please take a number. The Elements will be with you shortly.

Quotes help me through my writing process. Sometimes I get a quote stuck in my head and it won't go away until I use it in a writing prompt.

I might spend a slightly inordinate amount of time browsing TVTropes. Maybe.

Thanks! I try.

Glad you liked it!

Sometimes I need to try something new, and, well... this is what I get.

Doctor Doom, MODOK, and Thanos all agree. Oooh, Squirrel Girl x Fluttershy shipfic - GO!

Awww, cute. :rainbowkiss: No one gon' beat you at da fluff, Brunnen. No one.

Bureaucracy is magic :pinkiecrazy:

This is what you get when you haven't given Luna the updated Equestrian Unified Criminal Code and told her to memorise it for future reference. Of course, knowing Trollestia, she probably deliberately didn't do this, just for the lulz. :trollestia:

Nicely done. Now that I think about it, there's a lot of unexplored territory -- and untold backstory -- when it comes to Granny Smith.

Love never really dies and, because of that, neither does the pain of losing the one you love.

That was lovely. :ajsmug::heart::pinkiesmile:

Congratulations, sir. You have convinced me of ApplePie as a viable ship. FlutterJack now remains the only mane six ship I'm unconvinced of. :applejackconfused::fluttershysad:

Commence read.

That was a pleasant read. :scootangel:

Here's a paragraph pulled from a recent piece I submitted to TMP. It sums up my feelings on FlutterJack / AppleShy (Twilight's doing the talking):

"So who’d have thought that Applejack and Shy would move in? Turns out that Fluttershy needed that routine, the gentle comforting repetitiveness of farm life and rural schedule, and the general lack of daily drama that came with being a farmer’s marefriend. Applejack needed a mare who wasn’t afraid to walk the forest or the garden to get her hooves dirty, and who understood the ebb and flow of nature and agrarian life. I’m willing to bet that pegasus understands more about growth and fertility and the cycle of life than any dozen earth ponies you care to name, AJ excluded, of course."

Assuming Twilight and Rarity move back to Canterlot (Twi for Princess-hood or to romance a Princess, Rarity for her business), and Dash joins the Wonderbolts, then I picture Fluttershy and Applejack gravitating toward each other while realizing they should have done so much earlier.


I'm convinced. I guess FlutterJack has been overshadowed in my mind by FlutterMac. Similar scenario, but one of them would have to go into assertive mode to get the relationship going. Not so with AJ although that discounts foals (without some kind of assistance) and I always pictured Flutteryshy and AJ to some extent as the type to want to start a family.

But with magically assisted foals fairly common, little Applebutter would come along soon enough. :yay::ajsmug:

So much fluff XD
Brunnen you're the best,
Read a set of sadfics, got myself in a right ol' state, then ya got me brighter than a button and happier than pigs in mud
Oh my. Guess it's getting late if my brain's going to mac mode again XD
Toodle pip

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