I Destroyed a Universe

by TheLastBrunnenG

The Kind Wife

Wednesday the 3rd

Dear Diary,

Luna is so very good to me! For our anniversary she took me on a week-long safari to Zebrica. It was business and pleasure, I know, but it was still nice of her to bring me along, Oh, the critters and sights we saw! Tea under the acacia trees with the Camel chieftains, petting the cute fuzzy little badgers, meeting the family of crested caracaras – it was amazing.

She brought back a few gifts, too – a mask for Celestia, a mated pair of zebra finches for me, and a book on the history of Zebrican magic. She didn’t say who the book was for. After we came back to Canterlot today she kissed me and called me her “little Fluttermoon” – I love it when she does that, she says the kindest things. Then she dropped me off and left again. Said she had to deliver the book, and that she might be a day or so. I think she went to Ponyville.

All my love, Fluttermoon (yay!)

Tuesday the 9th

Dear Diary,

Luna finally came back this morning. She must have raised the moon, where ever she was, because it was especially beautiful the last few nights. I’m used to spending the night alone, it’s okay. I always did in my cottage, so it’s just fine. I go visit Angel Bunny a lot at his hutch in the garden. Luna enchanted it so it’s heated in the winter and cooled in the summer, and it’s rainproof and windproof. That was so very nice of her! I think Angel likes it.

At least, I guess he does, because he still won’t talk to me. The last time he did, he said I was a pushover and he left in a huff. I realize I’m a pushover, and I tried to explain to him that we have to make sacrifices sometimes. There are times we just have to accept that what we have is as good as we deserve and get on with our lives. He threw a carrot at me and hasn’t spoken since. Luna hasn’t spoken much either. I told her I’d like to go back and visit the girls sometime, especially Twilight. She says the Royal aviary and petting zoo need me, and maybe we’ll go next month. Oh, well. Anything for my Luna!

With love, Fluttershy

Friday the 12th

Dearest Diary,

Twilight came to visit! I only got to see her for a minute but it was very nice. She’s doing well. Owlowiscious is too, and Spike. She’s coming to visit with Luna to study, um, what was it? Oh yes, the effects of moon phases on magic! Luna’s the expert, after all. The best telescope in Canterlot is Luna’s, and she has texts on moon magic that no pony or library has access to – Twilight said so herself - so they’ll be studying here in Luna’s suite. Our suite. Luna apologized, she’s so very sweet like that.

I think I’ll give them room to study. I haven’t slept outside in years, not since I had to stay up all night when those three baby raccoons were all teething at the same time. The weather’s lovely for it, and the stars are really sparkling tonight.

Sincerely, Flutters

Saturday the 20th

Diary,

Twilight just left for Ponyville. I thought she’d stop to say goodbye, and I saw her boarding the train, but when I tried to wave she just ran really fast to the back of the passenger car. She was probably just very busy, she always has been. I’ve barely seen Luna this week. Finally I saw her at breakfast and she looked so happy! I do love her, especially when she’s like this. I’ll bet she’s very tired, and she has a lot of work to catch up on – she cancels Night Court a lot lately. I want to spend more time with her, but if she can’t, that’s okay. I understand. She gave me a good morning kiss before heading to bed.

What’s the word for when you get your senses mixed up and you start hearing colors and feeling smells? Synthetica? Synthemesh? Sin is Easier? I bet Twilight would know. I’ll have to ask her, because Luna’s kiss tasted the way lavender smells. I tried to snuggle up to Luna while she slept, because it’s always so warm under her wing. I wasn’t sleepy, I just enjoy the feeling, and I’ve been spending the night in other rooms while they had all the books scattered around. There were purple and pink hairs on my pillow. Luna’s mane is starry sometimes, and sometimes sort of indigo, but not really purplish like this. My pink mane-hairs are much longer than this too. That’s okay, it’s always okay. Everything’s nice. It has to be.

Shy

Monday the 29th

Oh, how I want to talk to Twilight, but I can’t. I might say something, well, not nice, and then we might not be friends anymore, and then the Elements might not work right, and what if Princess Celestia needs them? Needs us? Breaking the Elements and putting Equestria in danger wouldn’t be very kind, would it?

I can’t talk to Luna either. If I confront her, she might leave me, or I might stop being a pushover and leave her – oh, Iron Will, you bad, bad, minotaur, why did you have to show me what I could do? But we can’t do that. After the big wedding – Moon Princess and Element of Kindness – the whole kingdom started to love her, to really appreciate her. It made her seem more real, more, um, normal, instead of being a cold, distant Pony-who-used-to-be-Nightmare-Moon. If we split up, ponies might think Luna acted impulsively and rashly in marrying me, and they might not be so nice to her anymore. I remember what facing Nightmare Moon was like. I still have – well, nightmares about confronting her. I can’t take the chance that Nightmare could come back just because ponies stopped loving Luna again, because I couldn’t put my feelings aside to let her do… well, to do whatever makes her happy. I have to let her do anything that makes her happy, if that’s the kindest way to handle all of this.

So I can’t talk to my friends and I can’t talk to my wife and I can’t leave because none of that would be showing kindness. Is this what kindness feels like? I don’t think I like it very much anymore.

Yours, Kindness

Author's Note:

TMP Prompt # 165. The Prompt: Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!

The word for getting your "senses mixed up and you start hearing colors and feeling smells" is synesthesia.

This story was never part of the Luna's Librarian universe, of course. Consider it an AU "what it?" story.

Comments

[Avid Reader]

Commence read.

So I can’t talk to my friends and I can’t talk to my wife and I can’t leave because none of that would be showing kindness. Is this what kindness feels like? I don’t think I like it very much anymore.

[Silvernis]

Ouch ouch ouch. I adore TwiLuna, but this hurts.

[Jondor]

Right in the feels

You do brilliant work no matter what genre.

[Happy_Jack]

I think this is the first time I've ever hated Twilight or Luna, I'm really not used to feeling this way. I seriously wanted to reach in and crack their heads together.

[Hobbestc]

Why did i read this???? Dammit Luna! And Twilight!!

[JetstreamGW]

Y'know... I can't buy it. Luna, sure, but Twilight? Naw, I can't see it.

[RaptorCalloftheShadows]

You made a Fluttersad. D: Goddammit, now I have a sad.

[Quicksilver000]

and

[Cynewulf]

Jeez man