• Member Since 3rd Aug, 2011
  • offline last seen Yesterday

Harmony Spirit


T

"Twilight Sparkle is at college age, with no life experience. Living in the castle in Canterlot for most her life, her only friends are her books and, in his mind, Queen Luna's student Harmony Spirit. Queen Celestia has decided that her young student needs to learn that there is more to life than books. So now she has to go to collage in a little town of Ponyville, but the education she will find there will be far more than she imagined she would ever learn."

Little things to remember:
- This is an anthro(Furry) story. Ponies evolved (with magick) and some races in this world are feral, but stand erect. Such as Gryphons, young Dragons, and so on.
- The story is set in a universe that is like a retelling of the FiM series. Once just an excuse to write an anthro(Furry) version of the show, because of Shon Howell's pictures of Twilight in collage, has grown into a series of stories that has a deep history, and characters mostly its own. Some events are mentioned from the show.
- I replace many words with more pony sounding words, just as the show, but I am pretty strict about it. Such as "Hoof(ves)" in place of hand(s) even if they have hands and fingers, they spent generations having only hooves.
- Celestia and Luna are Queens of their respective hours. Lauren had stated that she was going to have them as Queens, but Princess was more acceptable to little girls. (Darn Disney)
- It is a Queendom, a term I picked up from "The Looking Glass Wars" Since it is ruled by two Queens, with no grumpy males. hehe
- There are many countries around Equestria, with many races who also have made homes in the pony Queendom.
- Bay-B is the Bayland Beyond. A Multipurpose social device, like an iPhone or Android, with a laptop, and Nintendo DS mixed in. Pretty much the only thing in the market that does just about anything you can think. (Becomes pretty background after the first two chapters)
- Ponies are very open, so things like being naked, same sex couples, and sharing the land with all walks/trots/flights/etc. of life, is not a big deal. Though Unicorns are kinda stuck up about nudity in public. Silly shame.
- There are a few Original Characters in here, as well as some Background Ponies.

I have been pouring a lot into making a rich history, and develop the characters with the same passion as the show. It has made me grow as a writer. I am no New York Times Best Seller, so little things might be off, but hopefully will not ruin the experience.

Legal stuff taken out of the chapters, to make them smoother:

This story is based on characters from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic cartoon series. Characters which are under ownership of Hasbro and Lauren Faust. I claim no ownership of the original characters, nor is this a licensed work of either. This is a work of fan faction.

This is a furry(anthro) style story, so all characters are to be considered as such. It is set in its own universe, apart from the one the show is. It is a different spin on the series, set in a deep history devolved from inspiration from the original series. As such, some events are inspired by the original story, some lines and/or plots may have been used or modified for the purpose of humor, or connectivity to those events.

Story is created by Jimaza Dememder (c) 2011
My Little Pony is a property of Hasbro, originally created by Bonnie Zacherle (c) 1981
Friendship is Magic is created by Lauren Faust (c) 2010
Playful Paws, Dodgy Dice, Cloud Chaser, ZeroG Stormwing, Harmony Spirit, are owned by their respective players.

Chapters (22)
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Comments ( 92 )

1748
Hehe, pretty close.

Love that shot, AJ looks so awesome.

You called them Bay-B's just so you could make that pun with Fluttershy, didn't you?

loving this series so far please keep it up and please put more pinkie pie into it :pinkiesmile:

1877>>1929
That obvious? XP But yeah. I wanted to have that joke, but I wanted to keep Twilight so solitary, she did not even have Spike. So thus born the Bayland Beyond. Or Bay-B as ponies call em. Come in three basic models, with various styles.
Dog, Cat, Bunny, etc. pretty much the low end, but no less effective. For those who don't need so much flair.
middle ground (honestly never worked on names) But have more options and features.
Dragon, Phoenix, and couple others, named for the Legendary races. Rarest and most expensive. Not much better than the mid rang, but just one of those "So fancy have to have" kind of things. Reserved for those of highest social class. Celestia has a Phoenix model (had that planed, even before her pet in the show, irony) Twilight has a Dragon.

As far as Pinkie, she pops in an out, but plays some important roles. Hope you won't be disappointed.

Is spike going to be in this?

1963
Twilight's "Bay-B" is a "Dragon" model...I'm assuming that is Spike :/

1963>>1968

Yes he will be, and no it's not. Coloured like him, but it's not a replacement for him.

Good, but there are spelling errors and most people speak with contractions, rather than " I will not'. I hope that since there are more chapters after this, you've cleaned the story up a bit. Practice makes perfect.

2024

For the character's speech, I try to break up the fact Twilight and the Queens, are more proper in their word choice, where as those in Ponyville are leisurely. I only recently tried to rid my sentences of those, but felt it better that the characters kept them.

Biggest problem, is my dyslexia is more in how I read things, and I do not really have an editor. I'm very defensive in my stories, (cause of the dyslexia) so I like it to be some one I know and trust, who can deal with my being whinny. First choice, is swamped with other things.

I hope not to disappoint, cause I have more chapters written and posted elsewhere, but here I have been trying to clean up more. Really want to grow, and become better.

I love the story, but there's one thing throughout the whole thing that has been bugging me. The correct spelling is "College". Not Collage. Just please fix those in the upcoming chapters, and you'll have yourself one of the best of the best!:rainbowkiss:

2858

Hehe, oops. I will try to remember to fix that. Will go back and fix the posted chapters too.

Thanks for the interest in my story.

I do like this story, well I mean, there are spelling and grammar errors but it's a GREAT story.. I look forward to reading upcoming chapters :twilightsmile:

Write lots more please :)

MAN, i can see this being an AMAZING manga! please make more, i really enjoy this

made an account JUST so i could tell you not to stop. See, now even if you DO stop, youll feel guilty about it because i went through ALL the trouble to make an account and tell you about it and tell you this and stuff.:rainbowlaugh: more pwease!!

I want to enjoy this story. I really do. I can look past a few grammatical errors here and there, but there becomes a point where it gets unberable. However, that is not the biggest reason why I can't get into this story. And that is reason, or the lack thereof. You gave absolutely no reason or explanation for why they suddenly became anthros. And, no, just saying it was some magic bullshit is NOT a valid reason. But, hey, that's just my opinion.
1/5 stars. Sorry.

I have really enjoyed reading this story <3 Carry on with the good work :pinkiesmile:

3405 I do make mention of it happening a long time ago in the history, plus the fact this is an alternate universe. I point this stuff out in the story description.

I do this stuff for fun, and share it with other pony fans. Yes it needs work, but I'm also not trying to become the next Harry Potter, or what have you.

Give critique, it helps me grow, but wording like "You suck, but if you learned English, it would be bearable" does not.

Have you stopped this? I hope not :(

i hope you havent stopped this story! i really love it:twilightsmile:

I like this episode a lot, though I am a little bummed out it wasn't going to be a Spike x Fluttershy, though no big deal just my fanboy opinion. I love your writing!

Man this is awesome. the grammars rocky, but it's mostly just unneccesary comma's, so that's not too bad. But the stories are entertaining, which totally makes up for the small stuff. :twilightsmile:

good story some selling errors but i dont mind i will read more:twilightsmile:

ha i dint expect the priness i mean the queen to go to the party

this is pretty amazing story

so what happend to them that they cant talk to each other?

so this story is a mixture of humman and pony?

i thought it would be harmony and twilight not twilight and AJ

enjoying the series pretty good

ha that what happend to all of us well

i havent bought a mlp fim toy but i prusume it happend to alot of people

this story i geting better and better

man now fluttershy in a relastion ship and spike building one with applebloom like i said "getting better and better"

this story is good make more chapters i like the series :twilightsmile:

13577

Am trying to improve on them. year 1 is almost half done, the next chapters after 12 will be more cleaned up than what I have now. If I can find time, will go back and fix these early chapters. Thanks for taking interest ^^

13577

Am trying to improve on them. year 1 is almost half done, the next chapters after 12 will be more cleaned up than what I have now. If I can find time, will go back and fix these early chapters. Thanks for taking interest ^^

13682

Just have to wait for that ~.^

13701

Ages ago, they were magickally evolved. More of that will be told in my Pony Tales series, set in this universe.

14175

Friend actually has it pretty down, and he only has the mane six, and a couple I bought him.

8785

Thanks, actually wasn't for my sis, would have been Rarity and Spike. She really made me love Spike and Bloom.

14583

Actually never really intended all the pairings. Just happens xP

5942>>7899

Back in action! Just needed to take some time.

12075

Thanks, I am trying to work on those commas. Found a grammar check in my program, and hopefully with a bit of comma-n sense, I can improve on it. ^^

Gah! I was going to have a chapter with a title like that D:, oh well can't wait to read this!

Spent the last 2 hours or so reading all the chapters that are out so far and I can't wait for more. I've tried to get into some of the longer stories on this site but never could really get into them but this story has pulled me in like few before ever have. Last time a story caught my attention like this was the Wheel of Time book series and I didn't find out about those books until the 9th one was released and now I have all of the books and waiting on the last one.

I really can't wait to see the story continue.

oh god you updated! with a cool chapter too! :moustache:excellent.

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