Hello!
My name is T. I was the tiniest troll in village. Trolls are mean. It is the life of troll to be mean. It is how it is.
Then I found orange pony, and pony is not mean. Pony are nice. Orange pony shows me other ponies and I like ponies. The other trolls found out I like ponies, and trolls are mean. Trolls says I love pony so much, I go live with pony. I say I am troll not pony, they say "NO!" I go live with pony, I only return if I eat pony.
But I say I do not eat pony be-cause they are nice and not mean! So they tell me to leave.
Now I lives with with the ponies. The ponies are nice and teach T how to read and write and all about friend-ship. Purple, pink, orange, white, rainbow, and butter pony are all nice to T. Purple pony tells T to keep practice writing, so I practice writing.
I said "What do I write?" They say "What-ever I want."
T the tiniest troll writing what T wants.
It makes T very happy.
-T, the tiniest troll
----
This story is a epistolary, "a story that is told through reading letters from characters to each other (or to someone else)." Thank AppleJinx for the word of the day.
It's a shame that the meaning of Troll lost its worth over the years.
I really liked this story, keep up the good work.
Hey! You published it. About time.
This is a funny and potentially very happy and friendship-affirming story. The thought of befriending something as alien as a troll is something that could only happen to the Bearers of the Elements, really.
You can get away with spelling and punctuation errors In T's letters just fine, as your notes say, but... not Celestia's. It starts at "finding" instead of "findings" and kind of continues down the road. Stuff like forgetting to capitalize Spike's name really doesn't make a good impression. (Same for not capitalizing "the elements of harmony".) Just in general the style seems a bit off to me. Do letters start with "To my..."? The very first sentence, "I am glad T, such a funny name for a troll, is behaving himself.", feels weird; would Celestia go on a tangent in the very first sentence of her letter? Are commas even the right choice?
I think this a very, very cool premise and T's first letter was an excellent start. Celestia's seemed like a letdown. There isn't really much of interest in it, and I can't help but feel you haven't even proof-read, let alone edited, which I think is a shame given the good start you had. And, to be quite honest, it's T I want to read more about, not Celestia's reactions to T's letter that he already wrote. I've read just one letter of his and I love them already.
2187819
With this story there will be letters from all the main 6. However you should be able to get the "story" if you just read T, but you will miss a lot about troll culture and physiology. Other characters will have more substance. Celestia's letter was basically commenting to Twilight and asking for more. The future letters will have a lot of the happenings focused on T from their perspective. Every other chapter of significance should be T but I will let you know that the next chapter is Twilight, followed by T.
I actually wrote this story about 8 months ago and have been waiting for cover art. So my more recent chapters should be better. And pretty soon I hope to have T's only problem be hyphenated words. The others will do this as a joke: AKA A-pull Jack will be written by the others.
Unfortunately I have a really hard time with proofreading because of moderately bad dyslexia. It doesn't help that when I was a kid I had it really bad and my ADHD hurt my learning capability. What I was taught did not stick very well and I am sure that some stuff was just missed in my education; in large part to they could cover some things multiple times. Em dashes, semicolons and other punctuation may have been talk about once but I got syllables around 4 times because other people had trouble with it.
I usually look over my stuff 8-10 times at least. It makes me a really slow author, on the bright side everything usually makes sense. As an example, I edited this post three times and it took me about 10-15 minutes. On the third time still found errors. I do apologize. I know how bothersome it can be. I edit and pre-read for others in large part to get better at editing, I am also better with correcting other's work. Unfortunately after 4-5 times it gets really hard to edit my own stuff because I "know" the story so well I just end up reading what I think is there.
I will look for the the things you mentioned. Thank you.
I love feedback especially for things I missed and can improve on. So please keep telling me. My other responses will be shorter
My work usually bounces around a couple of editors and with this story a couple bits changed after they looked at them. If you would like to assist I am a very patient author and sometimes wait as much for 2 weeks for edits. I only really bother editors if they did not get it done by when they said they would get it done and I do not hear from them. Even then it's usually just a friendly reminder in case they got swamped and forgot. I don't mind being on the bottom of the list, I just don't want to be forgotten.
2187671
Looking good so far!
2188326
No ...
You
2188207
I have nothing but admiration for anyone who works that hard, and patiently, on something they're not good at. Keep at it!
2188333
WANT MOAR STORY!!!
2188403
Basically: "Wow, good for you to have dedication for something your bad at. Keep on it."
My response sir.
2188410
MORE EDITS!
The next two chapters are ready but I should have an extra editor take another look since the story is apparently still lacking.
Wow, this story seems really interesting. Though this chapter felt a bit lacking, I really enjoyed the first. Will be awaiting more!
2189808
The next 2 chapter and and first side story are all gold. The side story will be a 1 shot that will eclipse this story.
Good so far, and while the story being a epistolary is a more creative, I'm hoping future chapters explain the whole story like how T first encounter with Applejack, befriending the main 6, and leaving the trolls. I like to read the whole plot from the chapters rather then from the summery.
yes i agree more of this story please i rather enjoyed it
it's storys like these ones i read and enjoy and actually read everychapter enstead of reading half way and reading the rest after a couple of months its cute its funny and this is the first troll fic with an actual mythological troll not the other type of troll we have nowadays
2190768
The next chapter I have to write, so 3 chapters from now, will cover more in depth the meeting between T and AJ.
I read this fic in the voice of Dagwood from seaQuest DSV. He'd make a great stand-in for T.
I like this.
2196795
So do I
Coni was right, this was indeed very adorable
I hope it continues to grow into something nice and more filling.
Looking forward to the third chapter.
2197322
I plan on having this turn into story that is similar to the episodes in content but with more contiguous focused character development. Most of the situations after chapter 5 will be covered by both T and the most relivant pony in the same chapter. It will be independant from the show (AKA no T inserted into the episodes.
Woo update!
2206550
Sorry, I ignored your warning and read the chapter.
I'm now wondering if Equestrian Trolls get smarter the colder it is, like Discworld Trolls, since they're both made out of rock.
Me:
>"Woohoo, new update!"
>Reads warning
>Walks away disappointed.
2206669
2206637
Thats what I get for posting at the end of the day
You literally sugar coated a troll
, if this was an intentional pun bravo, if unintentional it's possibly even funnier
Will all chapters be in the form of letters written to and from the princess?
2209796
yes
The troll is called Mr.T...
...He pities those pony fools
2211844
THE GLASSES IN YOUR PIC MAKE THAT STATMENT SO MUCH BETTER
2208514
CAUSE SERIOUSLY, I'M MISSING SOMETHING.
What did anypony know about trolls before? Nothing, it seems, and that may have cost lives. Well, things seem to be changing now. I hope that T is happy with his new home and his new friends. After all, he isn't the littlest troll anymore, is he?
Aw man, I feel so bad for those trolls, unable to move forever, while the other trolls wait for them, and use them to make more trolls. I-con seems to be a god-like figure, massive and barely moving.i hope T can live just as long.
What strange beings these trolls are! Of course, I bet that T thinks that ponies are weird, and he'd be right! A prank war appears to be brewing...
2212370
I have no idea what to call their reproductive cycle though. They arn't a sexual because they need help from others to creat young, but no genetic transfer is involved.
There is some extra information that will be be included later but in general it stumpedme.
2212362
There will be more explination later. I keep coming up with more troll facts, though the information will be slowing down a bit.
2208514
*rimshot*
2212490
Sounds like mitosis, since mitosis involves cells dividing and splitting off (like bacteria). If you think of the chunk of rock as a clump of cells, it makes sense. Maybe it's assisted mitosis, with the split cell behaving like an incubated egg when buried in the ground?
Psuedomonotremoid lithomitotic reproduction. There you go!
Trolls are starting to sound alot like Tiny from Dota 2...
Can't wait for more
.
2212306
A literal sugar coating
2206704
Twilight Sparkle making spelling errors? She must be using the broken enchantment pen!
2212725
I'll look at a few different things to see what it would be called.2213642
2212925
Damn. And I thought I was being original. Oh well, guess I will just have to change it to something I wanted to do anyway.
2213642
Ok. I just thought I missed something else.
2214670 Well thing that i got was the rock guys growing to be mountains... It was just a funny similarity between the two.. i doubt trolls can lift the ground up and crush demons, water elementals, gods and other assorted badies like tiny can. though i think the two tinys would get along swimmingly.
well im glad everything turned out ok
i was wondering how the trolls multiplied
I like Celestia's letter but it feels a bit off as T doesn't mention experiments at all so it comes from left field. Her crack about not needing intelligence to eat rocks felt out of character. She knows Spike eats gems which are a form of rock and he's likely to hear or read this letter. It feels very narrow-minded for a deity who has supposedly lived for centuries.
As well her comment about not being able to teach an intelligent pony to read and write in a week feels kinda funny. It sort of suggests that she implies T isn't very smart and then in the next breath suggests he must either be very intelligent to learn so fast or that Twilight sheds intelligence like dandruff.
Really enjoying it and can't wait for catch up.
Couple typos in there that surprised me unless they're meant to be deliberate from the enchanted pen. I like this chapter but it really feels all over the place. I would've preferred each letter detailing a specific event rather than glossing over them. It makes it feel shallow and hard to enjoy ebcause we're still learning about T so to only briefly mention his adventures puts things at cross purposes.