Silent Whisper
Joined 23rd Apr, 2017 ·
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Lovely story, and from such a lovely little Whisperling..~ Expect snuggles from me later!~
Delicious!~
I vote for him to take her to his bedroom and go again.
Definitely want that cuddling - and sequel - and threequel, maybe!
Has anyone else noticed that Twilight's father looks like Dunstan Thorn from Stardust (2007).
This was a good read, hope to see more of that stuff.
Deliciously sinful <3
So a mother/daughter follow up, would it be "Twilight Time" then? heh
Love it! Excellent work as usual, Silent.
Not bad at all.
One thing though:
That final part you should lose. Twilight wouldn't be thinking things like that. She would be caught up in the moment. Maybe have fear and excitement paralyze her or something.
Also her going desperate for his cock happened a little quickly. You should have more internal conflict there as she sees his cock and admires his strength in various ways.
8707237
I appreciate the input, but I like how it reads now.
8707353
I get that. But I seriously think you should consider the first thing I said. You should describe what Twilight is experiencing to help draw in the reader better.
Hello!
I have reviewed your story as a part of the Reviewer Café! As always, thank you for the time, effort, and hard work you have put into the creation of this story, and I hope you find my review of it to be at least somewhat helpful. Keep up the good work.
https://www.fimfiction.net/group/211585/reviewers-cafe/thread/308771/reviews?page=9#comment/6350997
I demand a 2 chapter!
Bring Velvet in for a Threesome
I've never been one for S&M, but I did enjoy the ending.
Liked, commented and already following^^
More please
This is fantastically dirty and cute at the same time.
I... Wow, this was incredible. This story hooked me in immediately and refused to let go. Almost from the first line, my pulse quickened, and with each paragraph leading towards the end, I couldn't look away. Indeed, near the end, before Twilight and Night Light actually start having sex, I could hear my heartbeat in my ears! That is to say, this was fantastic. I don't think there's much that you went for that didn't land flawlessly.
The brat/daddy dom dynamic (complete with Twilight's real father) was natural, and genuine feeling, and given an extraordinary edge thanks to incest. The progression from this into a stellar scene between the two was also done without wasting much time. Without a doubt, everything built towards that last scene, which was nothing short of perfect. I could see and hear everything you described with clarity, and it felt like a genuine spur of the moment passion. The flame between the two that burns three times as hot for a third of the time. Breeding always scratches a particular itch for me, and including more kinks on top of that makes the scratching of said itch that much more weighted and satisfying. That is, the combination of brat-play, breeding, and incest all created something that was greater than the sum of its parts. I know I don't leave comments like this usually on stories of this nature, so I risk coming across as a very weird person or a very genuine person, and I sincerely hope I don't come across as the former. In any case, excellent work Silent! I've been told your work in the NSFW was fantastic, and that recommendation gleams in golden spotlight!
Oh, let's see what this guy writes. Dark, dark, cute, silly, PORN, cute...wait what?
Why not all three at once?