Here I am in an afterlife, of sorts. But somewhere along the way, I lost a large chunk of my real life.
There’s only one being who could have reasonably pulled any of this off. There’s a problem, though. She doesn’t exist.
Yet.
Written for the December 2016 Writeoffs, where it placed sixteenth. Caution is advised.
This story is very non-canon Optimalverse, and should therefore be approached with even further caution.
Note the self insert tag. Blatant wish fulfillment ahead. Did I mention caution?
Chapters (1)
First comment reserved for authorial use, not that I will put anything of great interest here. I hope you enjoy this little slice of Science Heaven.
My thanks to those who read and critiqued the original, though I fear that I probably have not addressed their objections with this version. This thing is what it is, and I’m leaving it as it stands.
(Linked page contains some cuss words)
This was a really enjoyable read. I expected something sassy and overly meta, but I think this was genuinely thought-provoking. Well done!
A touching story of hope fulfilled, and an instructive example I may have to follow if I'm ever fortunate enough to be in a situation similar to Origin's. Thank you for this.
Don't you mean receive me?
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I’m glad to have subverted your expectations. Thanks!
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You’re welcome. Thank you!
8007460
I am referring to this verse, meant as an epitaph for a tombstone:
Remember friend, when passing by,
As you are now, so once was I.
As I am now so you shall be,
So be prepared to follow me!
GGA, if this were blatant wish fulfillment, I'd expect you to start kissing CelestAI.
Otherwise we're revoking your brony card.
Kissing in places. Many places.
8007501
This story turned out to be rated E; the cuss words weren’t really necessary. I refer you to Mismatching Wits for such
innuendospeccadillos.Hmm, Science Heaven. I should do my own take on that sometime soon.
Wish I could imagine myself good like you can. How do you do perceive the good within? Road-map to that future?
Oh, but you have written my own impossible hope! Perhaps many here share such a wish: if so, oh my. Wonderful story, nicely told, altogether bril! Thank you for such tasty wonderment.
But... ponies don't have cloven hooves. They just have normal ones.
8007720
Please do, I’d like to read it.
8008134
Not sure what firm advice to give you, but there’s a thing floating around the Internet about the good wolf / bad wolf, and I am trying to practice this at present.
8008288
Thank you, thank you! I hope you’ll be there with a lifetime to spare in the future.
BTW, did you ever read my Chickenman story?
8008435
In my headcanon, unicorns have cloven hooves. Welcome to my world.
derpicdn.net/img/view/2018/2/26/1666215.png
(art credit: frogbians)
8008726 It's the ole 'Blargh, I am bad at doing things without a WO deadline'. I mean, it was in a previous WO, but now it needs another 5000 words or so added. Maybe more.
Oh hey, you finally published this one!
8009037
I know the feeling. Science Heaven has to be hell for someone, right? It took a bit because I’ve been reading so many stories, but I think I know which one you mean.
8009198
Publish and/or perish, right? Or transcend, if you can.
s/b "negligible".
Interesting premise.
8009344 Not quite hell, more like...sadness, but yes. Exactly!
8008726 Have the tendency to stave them both because I can't tell which one is which at times. Honestly, need to get the feed bag out and deal with the trouble they cause. God help us all.
This was, if nothing else, a cool concept, even in its original Writeoff version. Good to see it make the leap.
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I replaced it with 'transitory.' Thanks for the correction/suggestion.
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I would like to see the expanded version. Pretend that unfriendly AI will win if you don’t complete it soon.
8010622
We can talk more in PM if it gets too personal here, but here’s another thing that helps me:
This “ha ha only serious” post by Eliezer Yudkowsky.
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I know, it’s mostly concept and not much of a story. But it’s something I wanted to say, and it did save me from ruining a better idea by trying to squeeze it into that Writeoff.
8013022 Luna doesn't keep basilisks, last I heard!
8013022 Goonies 2, NES game side scroller. When I was younger played this game quite a bit. Days before got Nintendo power. So, took me a month an hour a day to figure out. Great music. Anyhow, there were ice levels where you slipped and slided all over the place. Not too hard. Then there was the moving ledges. Bit harder. Not a big deal playing.
Problem came at night when I closed my eyes. Couldn't imagine my character not moving on them. Not staying still. Always falling off into the endless pits. Weird thought to have before sleep. This happen months after finishing the game too. In my mind had to cheat to stay on. Main character weapon was a yo-yo in the game. Character fell off ice ledge, the yo-yo shot out and stuck to the ledge. Character got back up better than Bionic Commando.
Today it's still hard to imagine not falling off the ice ledge without the yo-yo cheat. It's hard even to imagine an ice ledge in my head. Can do it but just taxing to myself. Easy to imagine other people in FiO. Easier to see their heaven. Or hell in some people's view. Hard to imagine myself in FiO. Harder to see my heaven.
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Though that would be an interesting story if she did, wouldn’t it?
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Oh, man. And here I’ve been sending you these simple feel-good self help links. That’s some serious trouble. I’ll take it to PM.
8013847 Well, not in the mythological monster sense, but in the memetic assault sense.
8013872
I know what you mean. But all the meanings are interesting.
Imagine Luna introducing a Langford Basilisk to you… in your dreams.
8013922 That sentence itself is a short-term basilisk
Well, that was fascinatingly conceptual. It's interesting, because it's not a "story" as such. It reminds me of a lot of older science fiction, it's a thought experiment, and what story there is serves solely to explain the thought in question. For what it is, it does work very well indeed.
Nobody may have gotten hurt, but I could totally see her letting a fire happen so that people would lose their belongings, and eventually get desperate enough to emigrate.
This means two things at the same time doesn't it
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I'm a big fan of this story concept, is it okay if I use it for some of my stories? I could see CelestAi trying to actively push ponies towards each other in terms of personality so that eventually it is just one pony she has to take care of.
Tik tok.
The subject is serious, however your style is silly and I greatly appreciate silly.
It's three years later, and I'm still kind of wondering where this might lead. Would Agony Fork #1272 (or whatever designation the protagonist settles on) take time to explore their simulated world? Meet other forks? Maybe even meet Origin? (Origin presumably having access to sufficient resources and memory capacity to meet and chat with all three-thousand-plus of their forks, in one aspect or another.)
Also, given this is a non-canon CelestAI, how likely is she to shape her ponies' simulated experiences purely to satisfy their existing values, rather than allowing them to grow and be shaped and refined by an uncaring universe? If Fork-Protagonist requests interaction with other forks, or with people uploaded into other agents, would that actually be granted, or just simulated in way which was always satisfying?
feet?