• Member Since 14th Aug, 2012
  • offline last seen Yesterday

Azure Sandora


I write sins... NOT tragedies. Link to Patreon

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This story is a sequel to Hatred


Many ponies think they know Princess Celestia. She's kind, warm, a giver and protector, much like the sun itself. What many ponies don't know is that Princess Celestia isn't as put together as ponies think she is. Actually, she's barely holding on, and during the day meant to celebrate the day she met someone important to her, someone she wants badly, she finally hits her limit and breaks down.

If she were a normal pony, this would be okay. But she's not. She's an alicorn. And Princess Luna fears that she could fall into a darkness very much like she did, becoming something much worse than Nightmare Moon. Desperate to save her sister before she falls into her darkness, she reaches out to the one pony she feels knows Celestia the most.

Her former student.

Now its up to Twilight to help Celestia in her darkest time. She's never seen Celestia in such a state, and seeing her so devastated scares her almost as much as the idea of her becoming something worse than Nightmare Moon. What she doesn't know is that the shadow around Celestia is getting stronger, and its taking the form of someone from her past. Will Twilight be able to protect her former teacher from this darkness?

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 39 )

sorry, supporting the nightmare Parasite lost my support. goodbye.

6757649 Eh, it's fine. I'm sorry you didn't enjoy it. But that's the beauty of this site. There are a thousand plus stories here, so I'm sure there's something you'll enjoy.

Thanks for giving it a chance though. Seriously, I'm not trying to troll you or anything. I'm just literally in that good of a mood. :raritystarry:

I'm sorry, but I couldn't fully enjoy the story. Far to fast paced, and writing "WTF" outside of speech killed it for me. Sorry! I hope others enjoy it more than I. :)

Gonna give like and follow, I'll read it later, but i hope this can be a large story.

It's an awesome story and I can't wait to see more

OK. I'm in for a bit longer. I'll agree that you might be going a bit fast, but that could be you just getting through some required setup before moving on to the main part of the story. I'm willing to wait and see.

Good writing so far, but some phrasings, such as the cursing, is a bit jarring for the characters but not too much for me. But others may not agree. Just something to keep in mind.

Can't wait for more. This really has my interest

6758556 Yeah, the beginning is meant to just establish the new status quo. Starting with the next chapter I'll be going at a much more even pace.

I'm so glad some one cam up with this idea. Having Celesta shone as for a lake of a better term, "mortal" and fragile like the pony she is and having twilight be the one that has to help her. this has grate potential.

It take a strong mind to weather the storm of eternity.

No one can weather the storm alone. at least not forever, and Celestia has bin alone for a vary long time.

Comment posted by nebulaegalaxy deleted Dec 23rd, 2015

You've got me interested. I look forward to seeing where you take this.

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Hmm, just let the characters, err, 'speak by themselves.' For instance, this tidbit was distracting for me:

That was a little unnerving to Twilight. She knew that she had immense power, but the idea of being a threat just seemed so odd. Still, she did have a great thirst for knowledge.

If you are narrating from a third person perspective, it is recomendable to avoid echoing character introspections. While it is not a 'sin', this is very hard to do properly, even with a omnisicient narrator. Besides, you do not need to explain your plot, especially with your character's voices; a real person wouldn't be reflexive all the time. As one person said: "stories about ponies are stories about people."
This is hard to explain, but it feels like characters are coerced to say stuff:

“I see,” Twilight said thoughtfully, “Princess Luna, do you really think that Celestia could become like Nightmare Moon?”

Either way you see it, it is poor foreshadowing or out of character dialogue. Perhaps re-think that part and move the explanatory stuff elsewhere from that dialogue, or from most dialogue: "readers aren't dumb."

And yeah, that "WTF" was WTF for me.

Well, have a nice day and don't forget your grain of salt with each comentary (good and bad) in small doses. And have fun.

Okay, I'm just gonna ask: Who came up with the quesadilla thing? I don't remember and I've been seeing it EVERYWHERE!!!! Well... maybe not "everywhere" but close enough. SOMEBODY TELL ME PLEASE!?:pinkiesad2::fluttercry::applecry::raritycry::raritydespair::fluttershbad::fluttershysad:

6946730 The episode "Party Pooped" with the Yak's. It's actually cannon.

6946769 But it's been around since before season 4... Does that mean... THEY READ THE FANFICS!?!?!?!? *Head implodes from shock*

note, I say season 4 because I read a story that came out just after season 3 where the quesadilla thing was a thing.

6946797 Huh I never heard of it back then but maybe. Of course I've heard a rumor that the writers are forbidden from reading fan works. Something about not wanting to get into any disputes about who created what and such.

6946823 WHAAAAA!?!?!?:pinkiegasp: THE CONSPIRACY!!!!! IT THICKENS!?!?!? BLAME THE ZEBRAS!!!!!

oh btw, have you heard the quesadilla song?

6946823 A little late to answer, but on the chance that no one has said it already: as I understand it, officially the writers and staff are forbidden and/or heavily discouraged from watching or participating in fan material due to legal concerns if fans were to claim they stole something. That said, it seems like a lot of staff (in both mlp and other franchises) pretty much ignore the rule. FIM's staff in particular seem to make a lot of references to fan works, and from what I've heard, plenty of the ones who go to cons clearly get references that fans make during Q&A sessions.

So officially, any similarities to fan works or theories are just really convenient "coincidences." Unofficially, odds are it was an intentional nod to the fans.

7133160 It might just be they know the references due to their popularity. I've never actually read cupcakes but I've seen enough tertiary references to it to know the story.

7133430 Considering Larson participated in "Bronies React to the Season 5 Premiere" and that Nowacking - popular in the fandom for voicing Vinyl in several fan works - was (allegedly) contacted by someone in casting about possibly voicing the role in SoL, I'm still inclined to think they just ignore it.

Please continue this story, it's so good.

This is nice I love how you put the comics into this. Reflections was a good idea to start with.

This seems very interesting, but I'm surprised that she cracked over this, and the way she talks about him makes me think they were closer than she was with luna it might just be my imagination

Well I wonder can the map be a troll too? But anyways, Celestia monarch of the sun will she turn Red of Hatred or Blue of Hope. That's what to see now. Good work on this and your other story's I'm hoping to see a wonderful ending.

There is depression and then there is DEPRESSION! Problem is, is that tia hit DEPRESSION! years ago and has kept going.

7487914 Yep, that is LITERALLY what happened here.

Is this ever gonna get updated again? :fluttercry:

7608860 It will. I'm just stuck on chapter 3.

7609246 Oh, yay! Well, you take your time.

I just really like the story :rainbowkiss:

ok my other sereis have all died so this is one of the few remaining good ones. but I'M STILL WAITING FOR AN UPDATE ah well i'll just have to wait longer

This is terrifyingly close to how I would imagine Celestia going dark. The mask starts to crack, the serenity begins to turn harsh and then all hell breaks loose when someone says or does something to cause that last, vital thread to snap. :twilightoops:

Don't mean to rush you but do you have any ideas about when the next chapter will come out or if fit ever will this story is very intriguing!:pinkiesad2::twilightsmile:

Ooh~. This is good. I’m putting a watch on this.

6757649
Pfft, and your support means what exactly? Please, regale us of your might, Oh Great One.

Too bad this is canceled...

11229499
Not cancelled. Just, on hold. I've got other stories to focus on, and this one I'm a bit unsure where to take it.

But unless it says "cancelled", then I'm liable to get back to work on it at any time, if inspiration hits or if I get an idea for it.

I really like this so far. Celestia has had to watch her friends get old and die and be separated from Sombra for centuries. It makes sense she would get to a point where she couldn't hide it anymore. I'm looking forward to more chapters! :twilightsmile:

11229552
Everyone need to rest sometimes, take care

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