• Member Since 20th Sep, 2015
  • offline last seen February 20th


Late-blooming fan with way too many story ideas in his head. Have written before, but this is my first serious foray into the world of fan-fiction.


With as many books as Twilight has on magic, one would think she could weather the loss of one. So long as it's not that particular book on forbidden transformation magic that could wreak havoc if it fell into the wrong hooves. But what are the chances of that happening, especially when she has such an efficient, detail-minded assistant like Spike?

(Rated teen for language and mild sexual innuendo)

Chapters (6)
Comments ( 68 )

If this ends up being a TCB story due to the first half of the book then I'm going to hurt you so bad.

No, this is definitely not a TCB story. I'm actually not that fond of the TCB universe as it currently stands. If I ever get it in my head to write a TCB story (not likely anytime soon unless someone reboots the whole damn thing to something more palatable), I'll properly flag it in the title like I've seen other authors do.

You have my attention, please continue.

I fully intend to, thank you for the comment :twilightsmile:

This story does sound actually interesting. I mean, surely a contrived coincidence like someone being able to make use of that magical book of spell would never happen. Just like stacking three books by accident.

...Nah, okay, I really thought this one was funny. The banter between Spike and Twilight felt really good. They were in-character, and the just randomness of some lines and developments made me chuckle. (Of course, Twily would wonder, seeing all those muscle-bound stallions in uniform around the castle for all those years.) The dragon orphanage line was also quite amusing. Good job.

Thank you for your detailed comment :twilightsmile:

I know I've set myself a bit of a challenge here in writing a comedy story, as comedy is one of the harder things to pull off right. So I've tried to also make it an engaging story as well. I'm really glad to hear that the dialog is working out. My stories tend to be big on dialog rather than action overall.

I almost have the expectation that the magical pony part of the book is a red herring and when humans show up they'll be using the OTHER part of the book, whatever is in there.


...well, that seems to be off to a good start.

Yes, well, if I did that, I'd likely have to bump up the rating to mature :trixieshiftleft:

Thank you!

sooo an occult nut found the real book of magic with REAL MAGIC principles... Said nut now has a viable way to apply all human knowledge/ ideas of magic into practical use. WHEN THE FUN GONNA START?:pinkiecrazy:

She already seems to be having fun, considering her reaction to her magical accident :raritywink:

Now I have a vision of Discord sitting off to the side with some popcorn enjoying the fun :trixieshiftleft:


Oh god, all the jokes in this chapter.

I wonder how many fillies would like to be Princesses if they knew it meant having to attend economic summits on banana imports.

Sorry for the delay in responding to comments, been a busy week. I hope to get another chapter out in a few days.

At this point I think Cadance would gladly give up that position to somepony else :pinkiesmile:

Thanks! :twilightsmile:

Glad you liked it :pinkiehappy:

Truth be told, the "bits" scene in chapter 3 was one of the first scenes for this story to spring into my head more or less fully formed when I first thought of the story idea.

Well, since Amy's obviously gone off the deep end and gone all evulz, let's see if she thinks fast enough to knock Twilight out.


If Amy and Trixie were to ever meet, how big would the resulting explosion be?

Depends on how much like Trixie she really is. Trixie did have some power, but she wasn't exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer :trixieshiftright:

Though watching them try to one-up each other would be amusing. :pinkiehappy:

On another note, I do see this story is picking up a few more dislikes than my other works. I encourage those disliking the story to leave comments as well as to what you didn't like, or send me a PM if you don't want to invite debate here. I want all comments, please, either in praise or criticism, so I can become a better writer.


They might be angry over the forced transformation trope. 'Tis a touchy subject, especially with the conversion bureau stories being what they are.

I suppose that's a possibility, too. In my writing I try to balance what I think people want to read with what I like to write, but I don't ever want to give up any particular subject matter due to a vocal group against it.

"Especially since this was supposed to be rated 'teen','" Spike muttered.

Ha! 4th wall break.

The totally not squeal bait epilogue

Seems legit.

I have a feeling this is going to end in Amy breaking out her mother.

Gee Twilight, it's not as if you haven't been wrong before or anything.

I hope not too many people minded Spike's bit of fourth wall breaking on occasion. I know traditionally that's more Pinkie Pie's territory, but where I had Spike being the deadpan snarker of the story, I thought it was appropriate.

I did toy with the idea of bringing in Amy's mother, but decided the story had enough characters, and I didn't want to bring in another OC that late in the story. And yeah, Twilight never messes up :trixieshiftright:

Anyway, thank you all for taking the time to read and comment on the story! :twilightsmile:


6763131 Well, Amy's mother *could* always be in the sequel...

This was a really funny story with all the not so subtle sex innuendos joke that had in it as well as all the stupid hypocritical lazy attempts of all the characters to try to cover the tracks of the mistakes they did. This is part of the fun of those type of comedy which goes in jokes with out needing to go into explicated sex jokes to be funny. I hope you will a sequel to this story and I hope the crazy mother of the family will be in it as well. I was also wandering what happen to the father of the group, did he left them because his wife was becoming increasingly weird in her behaviors or is there an other reason to this?

Whelp, hadn't noticed the updates. It seems the level of comedy was maintained throughout. I really liked this one. And oh Brad, that poor well-endowed soul.

I mentioned her enough, I probably have no choice :rainbowlaugh:

Thanks :twilightsmile: What's interesting is that I had not originally intended for there to be a sequel. I actually had intended chapter 5 to be the last part, but while I was looking at that chapter while editing for posting, I realized it just had to have an epilogue which sort of wrote itself. The sequel will likely have to wait a bit, as I have a backlog of other story ideas to attend to first. But yeah, I should tie up that loose end about the father.

Thanks! :twilightsmile: I was initially concerned that the humor had peaked near the middle and was not quite as funny near the end, but it was really more of a case where the focus of the humor changed. One can make only so many innuendoes concerning bananas :rainbowlaugh:

Eh, sanity is overrated :raritywink:

The dragon orphanage burned down? I think I might see where the problem with that might be. Fire breathing reptile youths contained in a structure capable of burning.

It was something that I dared not aspire to for fear of my reach extending my grasp.


Granted, that bit was more for the lolz than being serious.

Yep, thanks for pointing that out. Fixed!

some mere contrivance or coincidence!

ummmm... yeah, sorry to mess with your delusion of grandeur but.... that was the title of one of the books that sent that thing..

Her alicorn senses were tingling.

I see.... So Peter has to be bit by a spider, and she gets a pair of wings and a crown. Somehow that doesn't seem fair. Especially since her sense work way better.

Luna is best troll.

6728399 Oh come on, they could just sit next to Luna. That would make things....lively.

The show did so little to really flesh-out Luna's personality that I chose to portray her as the more playful one. I don't think I'm the first author to do this, though. Granted, where this was a comedy, I did portray Luna a little more over the top than I might in a more serious work.

Thanks for the comments :twilightsmile:

Thanks! :twilightsmile: I'll have to wait until I have inspiration for a sequel before I can do more on this, though ... :trixieshiftleft:

Thanks for the comment! :twilightsmile: I do hope to write a sequel to this someday.

Are you going to do a part 2 ?

I do intend to write a sequel to this story eventually once I get inspired for a good plot.

Thanks for the comment! :twilightsmile:

Well that was cool. May have relied a bit too much on innuendo for comedy, but still got guilty chuckles. Restrained itself from stooping to self-awareness or internet lingo any more than a couple of times, and clicked on at a nice, brisk pace.

Rating for scale :twilightoops:: i.imgur.com/2HeWPET.jpg / 10, would read sequel.

tommy chapels
atomic chattels
llamic mantles


"I mean, yes, the only dragon orphanage in Equestria burned down last month

Well, that's just sloppy. :rainbowlaugh:

Amy is kind of an asshole. What a witch.

Celestia's eyes widened, and a red glow touched her cheeks. "Luna! H-how did you ever learn about such ... naughty magic??"

"When you've been banished to the moon for a thousand years, you have to find something to do to pass the time."

A thousand years of nothing at all to do except peeping in on people's freaky sex dreams. It's no wonder Nightmare Moon was completely off her rocker after going through that kind of experience. I'd consider freezing the world a small price to pay for an end to all bodily fluids, too.


...Is it bad if I was totally rooting for Amy the entire time, no matter how hard you tried to make her the villain..? :twilightblush:

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