Sunset Shimmer drives Twilight Sparkle home after a late night at the movies.
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blue harvest
Joined 7th Oct, 2012 ·
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Featured In8
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That was just beautiful. But then again, the instant I saw my fav alt account post a Sunlight story, that was to be expected.
I hope you'll explore this pairing a bit more~
My goodness, that was adorable.
SunLight? Hell yes, please!
cute
HeeeheeeheeeeeheeeHHEEEEHEEEHEHEEEEEEEEAAAHHHH--
I did an actual double-take when I saw this story. I thought this account had been put out to pasture. Glad I was wrong.
And goddamn if it isn't cute. There's something about this pairing that just... works. And this story does it justice better than many that I've seen. I'll echo Misago in saying more would be welcome.
This was a treasure. A fantastic and amazing treasure.
I can't even begin to explain just how much I loved it. From the vocabulary, to the characyerization, to just -everything-.
I just wish there was a way to have more. I just love this so much that I'm left unsated. Gasping for more. Gosh, this was just... a treasure.
Currently one of my favorite ships. Thank you. This was an extremely entertaining story to read. You seem to have a way with words that can make the simplest story beautiful. Gosh!
That... Ending... My... Heart... So... Cute...
*flatlines*
this is so cute but,,,, WHERE'S THE KISS I WAS WAITING FOR?!
Was hoping the next blue harvest post would be another AppleDash story, but...
...this was a cute read nonetheless -- I can't lie. Felt natural, had the warm fuzzies, and it was worth a chuckle or two from sheer cuteness overload. I give it to you: When you write romance, you never fail to deliver.
Hot damn. I'm not the biggest fan of your paragraph structure or the way you use ellipses, but I'll be damned if some of the prose here wasn't downright beautiful.
The way you write make me feel like a billion sun all imploding and creating another world that than proceed to explode again.
I love that....
I want more....
Please do more.....
6586103 This is what is so beautiful with this story right now
They don't need to kiss...
Not yet...
I laughed so hard at the name of this. One of my friend's nicknames is pigeon toes because he has them.
This was interesting. Very well-written.
6588054 That can wait until the sequel.
Since I was just rereading this:
I think there are some quotation marks missing in the middle.
To be honest, I was a bit thrown off by the 2nd Person perspective at first. That style isn't my usual cuppa tea.
However, I got to say I liked this. It's very subtle and it flows really well covering a tiny set of actions. You wring quite a lot of drama out of very few ingredients and that's just beautiful in it's own right.
There are a few word choices here and there that make Twilight's inner metaphorical monologue sound just a touch too poetic, but that's a quibble and an exceedingly small one at that. Overall it sounds good. Sounds natural and unforced. The lead up to the ending is sweet and I enjoy how it can be interpreted multiple ways for the readers and the characters.
That's some pretty tight storytelling.
good story but i just cant picture sunset with out her jacket plus she did change jackets between the 2nd and 3rd film any ways (or did she change after the first )
6638272 It's first person, not second person. The POV is being referred to as "I". Second person refers to the POV as " you".
6669243 Well, actually it's both. Twilight is telling the story from first person, but at the same time she refers to the reader (In Sunset's position) as you. This is confusing.
6669486 The reader isn't Sunset. This misconception arises from the fact that the "you" pronoun is rare in first-person literature, but it DOES happen occasionally.
Have you ever had internal thoughts about someone in your life, and subconsciously formatted them into a hypothetical conversation, as if you were speaking to them, even though they weren't there? We might stomp away from an argument, fists clenched in furious regret, asking "Why don't you understand?" Or kneel at the grave of a dearly departed, whispering, "I miss you so much." Or sit at a table for dinner, hands clasped, praying, "Thank you for this meal".
People do this, some very often, because we silently wish that the thoughts we were feeling, the things we were saying, could actually be heard by the person we were directing those thoughts to.
This is what Twilight is doing now. The "you" is referring to Sunset, but the usage of "you" does not mean Sunset is us. It is merely the narrative style of Twilight's internal voice, and its purpose here is to express how much Twilight desires to say these things out loud to Sunset, even if she can't quite work up the courage to do so.
In fact, earlier someone compared Twilight to Helga Pataki from Hey Arnold, and I thought it was an astute comparison for this very reason.
She refers to Arnold as "you", but we are not Arnold.
I loved the story having these little details which gave so much more to it. That little background story of her friends around the pair. The description of Sunsets eyes.
Reading this is like viewing a beautifully composed painting. Lovely work.
In hope that this all leads to something and doesn't end here.
Okay I just want to say that the perspective you chose for this story is freaking painful to read. You can't do first-person AND second-person narrative perspective. If the story is first-person narrative from Twilight's POV, it shouldn't be narrating TO the reader as a second-person observer. It's just...weird, wrong, and all kinds of awkward to read.
That said, this is a sweet, touching little shipping fluff story. I would upvote and fave it, but I can't because of the bizarre 1st+2nd perspective thing. It was just too much of a chore to deal with.
6677969 It's not second-person, yo. I refer you to my previous comment: 6669518
6715926 It's first-person with the reader understood to be second-person. Which is just a terribly confusing way to write.
6715942 No it's not. It's first-person with Twilight narrating in poetic second. When she says "you", she's referring to Sunset, not the reader. The reader doesn't exist.
Did you watch the 30-second video I linked? Or read the post I linked? Should I just--? Ah fuck it, I'll just quote it.
6715993 Believe it or not, I am aware that the "you" in the story is Sunset Shimmer. You seem to be hung up on that fact as an excuse for this "poetic second person" style, and are determined to ignore my point, which is that it is awkward to read.
6716027 And I quote:
I'll accept the backpedal though.
Moar of thiiiiiis. I neeeeeeeed it.
Simply beautiful. Every word is so delicately placed, and the mystifying feeling of Twilight's metaphorical journey through her own thoughts is on point. The perspective is interesting; it's rare to see a story written as though the protagonist is telling the tale to a second person. It all works. Very sweet, had me damp-eyed at the end. The only other thing I would've asked for is a kiss, to affirm each other's feelings, but that's just my insatiable appetite for romance talking. This story's atmosphere is perfect without an outright act sealing the deal. Although, if you ever decided to write a follow-up story to this one where the two girls officially get together, I'd be very, very happy to see it.
Celestia, I wish to see this happen
I loved it, all of it.
But, all the epic daww aside, this line?:
This is the best thing I've read in a long while. Bloody marvelous.
Oh god. SciTwi is, to put it in your words, adoracute.
And that's definitely not the shimmy she wants to be doing.
Show him up?
Don't forget to end the speaking dialogue with ( " )
Not a bad story, but i agree that it was "painful" to read. though, i have heard of other stories written like this, this would be the first i have read... but i like the story enough to give it a fave and up vote it.
(just in case anypony is wondering, the writing style, unless i am mistaken, is called "character x reader")
You are truly the prince of purple prose.
Beautiful, my friend. Gorgeous.
6843003 You ain't the only one, buddy.
You keep his(her) shirt(jacket), (s)he keeps his(her) word.
There was a slight stumble in the beginning until I realized Sci-Twi was the narrator and I, the reader, was Sunset Shimmer (or at least, she was narrating as if to Sunset anyway). This was fun and a super endearing and cute thing.
That was freaking cute