All In
“I... I don’t know, Rainbow Dash.” Scootaloo shuffled her forehooves, the fur of one leg scritching nervously against the other. Her eyes looked off to the side, seeking escape.
“It’s not a big deal, squirt,” Rainbow Dash assured in smooth tones and with a winning smile. She even threw in a teasing eye-roll before locking back on her mark. “Tons of ponies do it. It’s one of the best-kept secrets, but all the greatest athletes got to where they are this way. I’d list off half the Wonderbolts’ roster just naming the ones I’m one hundred percent sure about.”
“Can’t I just train harder?” the filly pleaded.
Rainbow allowed her grin to fade into a sterner expression, while still keeping it open and understanding. She wasn’t the enemy; merely an educator. “Look kid, you wanted me to coach you to be the best you can be. And as your coach – and your big sister – I’m telling you: If you want to reach the next physical level, this is what you need to do.”
She once again extended a hoof, and in it – the product. The thing that could give Scootaloo the edge she needed. The thing that her parents and her school had warned her never to even touch, let alone partake of. To the filly, it was as if the offered hoof, despite its familiarity, were coated in infectious sludge, and she recoiled instinctively. Rainbow didn’t press any further, but neither did she retreat.
“Isn’t it illegal?” Scootaloo looked from side to side, jogging her memory. “I– I mean, isn’t it banned in official competitions?”
The older mare rolled her eyes again and gave a dismissive snort. “It’s not illegal. Nopony’s gonna throw you in a dungeon.”
“But, in competitions–”
“Only in some of the nationals. Maybe in a few places like Canterlot or Manehattan. But there’s nothing they can do to stop it. Long as you quit for forty-eight hours, there isn’t even a test that’ll peg you. You just use some for training, to give yourself more energy and build up stronger muscles. The day before the competition you eat plenty of oats and drink plenty of water, everything gets flushed out of your system, and you’re good to go. There’s no way for anypony to tell.”
The young filly had heard the warnings – the effects on a pony’s body could be devastating.
“But– but... it’s dangerous, isn’t it? It makes you sick.”
A touch of impatience was worming into Rainbow Dash’s demeanor. “I’ve been doing it for years. Do I look sick to you, kid?”
“N– no.” Scootaloo watched her hoof scrape weakly at the dirt. “You look great.”
“Exactly!” Watching her student-slash-little-sister practically tearing herself in two over this decision, the mare tossed her spectrum mane back, looked to the sky, and drew a deep, calming breath before trying again. Adjusting her approach slightly, she withdrew her foreleg and placed the current threat back in its brown paper package and out of sight.
“Okay. You’re right about one thing. We’re not talking about children’s chewable vitamins here. What we wanna do is change the way your body works. But that’s not a bad thing. You’ll get to be faster, grow bigger and stronger. Make yourself into a real sportsmare.” The corner of her lips turned up near-imperceptibly. “Maybe even get those wings of yours knocked up a couple of sizes.” She gave Scootaloo’s feathers a friendly poke.
At this, the little orange filly snapped out of her inner battle. “You mean... I could fly?!”
Rainbow began to smile in earnest once again, but stopped short of declaring victory. “I dunno. I can’t promise you that, squirt.”
Scootaloo’s ears drooped.
“But, I do know it’s your best chance. And I think you owe it to yourself to at least try. Life’s about pushing yourself harder and taking every chance you get.”
And just like that, the little pony was back inside herself, the war still waging.
If she gave in, it could put her in the hospital. It could even kill her. That’s what all the lessons and the lectures and the posters and the roleplays and the “Just say ‘No!’” campaign at school had taught her. She was playing with fire here. Ponies had died.
Died.
Croaked. Pushing up daisies. Worm food. All because they thought they could beat nature and fast-track themselves to ill-gotten victory.
But here was Rainbow Dash – her idol, her mentor – telling her the exact opposite.
“But...” the losing side made a desperate push, launching the last of its weapons. “But even if you’re right, what about all the toxic stuff they put in it? I mean, the ones who sell it – to make more money, they fill it with all sorts of junk that’s bad for you, don’t they?”
The adult mare was back in confidence mode, knowing that, whether the filly was aware of it or not, she’d already come to the right decision. She just needed to understand it.
“You’re talking about filler. Yeah, it happens – if your supplier’s some shady creep. You don’t have to worry about that. Gilda hooked me up with a guy years ago. I trust him. He only supplies top product. And the griffons know their stuff; heck, they invented it!”
Scootaloo bit her lip and said nothing.
“Besides, I wouldn’t ever give you something I wasn’t using myself. This stuff’s good; I guarantee it.” Rainbow looked at the poor filly still putting up a hollow front of resistance.
She sighed. “It’s your decision, squirt. I’m not going to force you to do anything. If you wanna play it safe... I can roll with that.” The emphasis was delivered with expert precision.
Scootaloo lifted her head, eyes fresh with determination.
Rainbow Dash unwrapped the brown paper.
That was it. The struggle inside her had come to a close. In reality, the outcome had been determined years before, when Scootaloo had first laid eyes on the pure marvel of athleticism, adventure, and attitude that was Rainbow Dash – and decided that she would do anything to be like her.
Despite her age, the filly was not blind to the truth. She knew that Rainbow Dash wasn’t perfect.
But ‘perfect’ didn’t mean the same as ‘awesome’.
And Scootaloo wanted to be awesome.
Her young hoof reached out, and received.
“So... what exactly is this called, again?” she asked as she brought the dark-red-and-white-mottled stick to her mouth, and took a determined first bite.
“Salami.”
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Don't do it, Scootaloo!
Wait a minute... could it be? A vague summary that suggests something untoward will happen in the fic, but manages to avoid mentioning it directly? Oh boy, a fakeout fic! I love this game! ^_^
EDIT: Rats, you win this round. I wasn't able to guess the nature of the fake-out until it was too late.
Rainbow Dash. The Lance Armstrong of pegasus
Oh my gosh you got me. I guess fool me once shame on me...
You really got us there! We all thought it was steroids, but it's actually meat. Good one!
5617138 so nether of you drink coffee tea or soda? Avoid chocolate and other caffeinated beverages.
Fun Fact: Most herbivores can, in fact, digest meat, but lack both the instinct to hunt for it and the right kind of teeth to chew it, which is why they stick with plants. However, red deer are an exception to this rule, and will go out of their way to hunt birds and other animals of that size. They've actually been called the world's most bloodthirsty herbivore.
5617192 Yup. That said, horses, deer, etc are opportunistic carnivores. Deer are routinely caught eating carrion, and there is plenty of youtube coverage of horses eating chickens or other birds as examples.
Now the salami thing was a great twist though.
nice twist lol i was totally convinced it was something else lol
Dat protein though.
Jeez, getting the kids started so early. Rainbow, how could you! What;s next huh? Huh?! Ham? Burgers!! BACON?!
Next thing you know, she'll mainlining egg yolk. Another life destroyed by Rainbow Dash.
Delicious!
Also, you pretty much pegged my headcanon here. Namely that ponies can eat meat and in fact it would give them greater strength and such, just it's a cultural thing resulting from all the intelligent little animals in Equestria. So good jorb there, Homestar.
Nice twist! Fav'd.
And here in this story we have a Rainbow in her natural environment, smoothly preying upon the smaller Scootaloo. Using her hero worship to convince her, Rainbow coaxes the smaller pegasus into putting her salami in her mouth
5617747
Well, at least it wasn't chicken...
img4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120412022055/mlp/images/thumb/f/fe/Twist_extremely_happy_S1E12.png/300px-Twist_extremely_happy_S1E12.png memecrunch.com/meme/13FIX/what-a-twist/image.jpg
5618021
BURN!
Pfft, this is totally meaningful! Dash is a terrible influence and it's gonna bite her in the butt.
Yes! I managed to guess what was up when Dash mentioned griffons. Poor Scootaloo -- once you've tried it, you'll always want it.
For a moment I thought it was going to be an energy drink or something like Red Bull.
Cause you know, Red Bull give you wings.
5616702 Ah, that's the term I was looking for all this time: "Fakeout fic"! And, yeah, I love those.
5617512 I wanted to throw in something about working Scootaloo up to beef brisket at the end, but it would've been too tacked-on.
5617192 Correct. In some historical cases horses being prepared for long expeditions where fresh food was scarce were trained by humans to eat meat, since it was easier to carry.
5617580 Thanks, coach!
That is my headcanon as well.
5617747
5620219
As soon as we gained the ability to make bookshelves, I made one dedicated to Fakeout Fics.
5619512
You magnificent bastard.
I was expecting an anti-drug message at the end as the fakeout, like Scootaloo opens the package and there's a note that says "You shouldn't look up to me so much that you'd comprimise your morals" or something like that.
Instead, comedy out of the blue (or more like ruby-beige)!
Nooooooo!!!!!!!!!!
how did rd get that!!!!!!!!
I was expecting Rainbow would tell Scoots to binge on protein bars or something else that was stupid and probably unhealthy, but that a really obsessed athlete would do.
I do like this twist better though. Even if I personally don't buy that there would be a stigma against meat in Equestria, I also don't buy that Rainbow would give Scoots something illegal, and that sure doesn't make it any less funny.
And where exactly did that salami come from, Rainbow Dash? We are dealing with a dangerous possibly illegal substance here.
So...was it Tawny Flower? (hint: read her biography)
I have written a review of this story; it can be found here.
Nice.... Very nice..
5617192 Other, only tangentially related fun fact--the panda actually has a carnivore's digestive system. They move so little and eat so much because they get virtually no nutrition from bamboo, and can't spare the energy needed to hunt (although they'll eat small animals that get too close).
More on-topic, there are a number of points in history where meat-eating horses pop up. The most famous/awesome/horrifying was the Man Eater of Lucknow, who killed and ate a number of people in the Kingdom of Oudh in India during the British Raj. When he was eventually captured, the maharaja ordered it to be fed to a tiger--except the horse kicked the tiger's ass and sent it running away.
¡Ponies! ¡Salami is made of ponies!
5617560
I can't imagine that the ponies would have a taboo against eating eggs. Against eating FERTILIZED eggs, yes, but normal eggs would be fine.
5617747
troll.me/images/thumbs-up-jesus-says/i-see-what-you-did-there-and-i-like-it.jpg
5628067
Indeed. Pinkie uses them for baking. I was originally going to bring up the fact that eggs/beans/soy/tempeh could take the place of meat in her eating regime but that'd just undercut the story's joke.
Got me. Now you just need to correct spelling mistakes.
5649657 I will if you point them out.
5650069 As you wish.
*looking
*your
5651958
Thanks. I changed "you" to "your".
The first thing you mentioned is not an error, though. You can lock on to something with your eyes.
This... actually makes perfect sense. Suspenseful, yet entertaining. Well done!
5616732
OK. Just looking at the story, I knew it was going to be a fakeout, and I suspected something terribly stupid. This is actually pretty clever, though. I am disappointed I didn't catch the Griffin thing, which is the biggest hint towards what the fakeout is.
Also, your specific word choice on that last line is spot-on: you're right about the viewers are morons bit. I wouldn't have gotten it otherwise
really meat and here i was hopeing it was steroids
I got as far as the Gilda before I figured out it was meat. Good story.
This story continues to amuse me more than it should.
Nice fakeout. Now I'm gonna go and eat some salami.
Don’t do meat kids.
Heh, you had me guessing for a bit. The Random tag tipped me off to the fact that it wasn't what it seemd - made me chuckle nonetheless. Good job.
5617100
No drugs for mental stimulation? What about the red dyeing Sappho root and Spice Melange...