After Opalescence gives birth to a litter of kittens, Rarity is happy to show them off to her friends, but when someone takes “They’re cute enough to eat!” to the next level, awesome things happen… or not.
—Now with 20% more kittens!
—Delicious, bite-sized chapters for better digestion!
—Fortified with Vitamin Aquaman for 120% more Awesome!
—On more than 50 favorites/bookshelves; and more than 3 trackers!
—Now with a horribly deficient TVTropes page!
While it's not really a crossover, the [Crossover]-tag is included because of the appearance of Spike, Aquaman, and possibly Nicolas Cage. (The [Random]-tag is there for a reason!)
We'd be happy for you to join us on this delicious tail tale.
Chapters (16)
Typo: you say fo instead of for. Good luck finding it.
I liked it a lot. It could use more description relating to the kitten swallowing. That's the best part.
Had to read this to see which direction you were going to take. Strange that this didn't upset me as much as I thought it would. Must be the way you played it so no one actually was aware of what Rainbow did so no one got traumatized.
5659456
Thanks for the typo-warning; already fixed.
I'll see about putting in more description in when I upload the second chapter...
hooves*
s2.quickmeme.com/img/15/15f50ce547e1548b3752897f8c2320f9f873cd9977f4c5ec86ce1801af0aae9b.jpg
Spacing could be better but oh well.
This story is weird. I like it!
5659573
True, but 'feet' isn't incorrect... after all, shoes go on feet, right?
Wow -- Thanks for the catch... apparently my spell-checker thinks "dah" is a word. (Probably because I added "Ta-Dah!" somewhere or something like that.)
Yeah, it looks better in my word processor.
(
) Me too! / (
) Thank you!
5659628
They don't wear shoes though; they wear horseshoes.
What a delightfully weird fic, but the Kitten swallowing is going to need more description, as it is indeed, the best part of the fic. I'm also glad no one found out about Rainbow Crashes new... Appetite, despite the interesting reaction Rarity would give.
I'm also predicting this is where Rainbow Dash falls off the slippery slope, becoming the evil Overmare... MUAHAHAHA!
Very, very odd. I am intrigued to see where this one goes.
5659628 Technically a hoof is more like an extreme toenail. Most of a horse's true feet don't come in contact with the ground; they effectively walk around on tiptoe.
"That was enough to cause Rainbow Dash to inhale/gasp in surprise, swallowing the poor defenseless kitten".
That escalated quickly.
But this was... interesting. Well-written, to be sure. And a very original thought.
Good story.
5659888
Horses have feet. Just like how our feet include our soles to our ankles, a horse's includes from the hoof to the . . . whatever else. The hoof is the equivalent of a human toe, not the name of a horse's feet.
ARGH!! I was wondering why Spike was described as having blonde hair earlier...
5668369
— Thank you!
That Gummy picture is downright nightmare-inducing...
5670593
-- All the better for interrogation, no?
GUMMY WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU
As far as crackfics go, this looks decent. I haven't even read yet, but what's drawing me in is the fact that there's multiple chapters.
5675213
Well, I hope you like it when you do get around to reading it.
Finally! Been waiting for this!
5688108
The new chapter, Rainbow Dash getting caught, or the reveal that the Chinese place was using cats?
5688167 All of them.
I was wondering if Burn at the Steak was a misspelling or not...
5690426
It was at first, but then I thought let's roll with it.
(After all, it's a judicial system put in place by Discord...)
And that is how you retcon something!
What... just... WHAT?
Still, very good chapter anyway. Can't wait for more!
5690742
5668369
These comments make me laugh every time I see them --- Thanks guys!
Sequel please
An African or European swallow?
5695185
African.
THIS NEEDS A CROSSOVERTAG DAMMIT.
It also needs more Upvotes. MOAR!
5695549
Well, alright...
I dunno; add it to a group maybe?
Recommend it to a friend?
Also, did you like the zipper?
5695603 Yes. Yes I did like the zipper. Now RD can eat a kitten over and over and over and- well, you get the idea.
I'm getting a "I Know an Old Lady" vibe here.
5695911
-- I was hoping someone would.
Vampire Spike?
5696547
Did you miss chapter 3, or forget about it already?
5698502
I was momentarily confused :P
Good thing I'm reading on a tablet.
5702733
Blast! I've been reverse-trolled!
What, no bear suit? For shame.
Now the real question is... is Dash truly cured of her kitten addiction, and what will Mr. Cage say to that?
(Here's to Cage and Dashie kitten-munching love)
5703630
You just want to see a game of kitten-poker involving Spike, Winnie the Pooh, and Nicolas Cage in a bear suit... admit it.
5704561
only if you add RD in Nic Cage suit and give Spike some kind of costume as well.
Gotta keep the theme.
5704678
Now I'm tempted to make it a shark costume... and add in Spike getting thrown in a burlap sack, somehow.
5705699
Go for it. The who superbowl shark thing is in right now.
5705699 BECAUSE SHARKS, BITCHES!!!!!
5690426
Apparently it's a joke.
They're not burning at stake like normal, instead they're burning at steak by being forced to eat a burning hot steak.
5696547
No, just Spike from Buffy the Vampire.
Heh, a good one. Only recommendation would be for the first section, in the restaurant, add in a bit more and have the food arrive. Give Rainbow's thoughts (again about how her kitten craving goes away) and then Nic's about how he enjoys the flavor of the food and "whatever kind of meat they use here."
5708673
Ok, I expanded the first scene a bit, changed the link for the alternate chapter-title, but couldn't quite fit in the meat comment.
Thank you for the ideas.
5709016
Cool. I see the new song link (Oh god...), but don't see new material.