Twilight discovers the true purpose for the Canterlot Royal gardens, much to Princess Celestia's annoyance. Knowing her student will seek answers with or without her permission, the Princess gives Twilight a new subject to study, the story of five of the garden's occupants, their connection to Nightmare Moon, and the dark days of the War of Night.
Warning: Comments are encouraged, but spoilers are present in the comments.
Fic is currently undergoing a very slow revision. Revised chapters will have a (R) in the title.
I've also added chapter numbers for a bit more ease of navigation. Mostly on my part.
This is a project that I will slowly be working on Bringing my first major story up to snuff. I shall also be fixing plot holes and clearing up some issues that certain parts have that may contradict the lore later on.
This will only be worked on sporadically unfortunately as I need to be in certain mind sets to do this.
Original story was posted in 2011.
Tags: Action, Historical, Sad, Humor, Roller Coaster, Violence, Singing, Some Romance
Part 2 is here.
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/71261/stories-in-stone-memories-of-twilight
WOOOT featured on Jan 5th 2015 at 2:47 am, 4 years after it's initial publishing!
This is a great fix, I am happy to see you extend on it. I'm impatiently wAting for more
another good chapter, much better grammar this time around, and it was much easier to read. I enjoy this story and am definatly gonna keep tabs on it
I like the further picture this paints of the spirit of generosity, and the dialog between the characters had me laughing on a few occasions. ^^
Comic is Garden Party: Petrified by PumpkinHipHop on DA
loved the drill Sargent! again the characters continue to amuse me good work
I imagined every one of the drill seargent's line in R Lee Ermy's voice!
Very happy to see you continuing this, and i wish for more!
It seems the Royal Canterlot Voice was mildly annoying even back when it was common place. I must admit this story gets more interesting with each chapter. I can't wait to see how it continues.
moremoremoremoremoremore
I would suggest adding a carrige return or two somewhere in that bit of run on rambling. Looking forward to the next chapter.
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee I wanna go to the Pinkie Pie fun fair!
Rock puns ftw.
i can probably pre read for you just message me k
"Costello: I don't know".
Right before the first use of a bold Third Base.
Loving the story so far. Next chapter should be interesting, I predict chaos and tragedy.
Elder Scrolls reference
hahahahaha yay its the whos on first base skit i loved doen that skit when i worked at a boy scout camp in CO.
Some letter mixups ill just go and fix those when i go thru your stoy on google docs.
Miiiight wanna trim the "Who's on first?" sketch. It detracts from the narrative flow.
When refering to a military officer, "Sir" or "Ma'am" should be capitalized. The last portion needs some general cleaning up, ex: you're instead of your, comma placement. Good use of apples, provides better visualization of the dimensions of things. Looking forward to reading more!
how do you consistently manage to mingle humor, life and death situation and outright stupidity (moslty from rhede that guys craaazy) into this masterpiece??
i swear man this is one of the best fics i've read, definately in the top 5!
There's some tense errors here, where the story switches between present tense and past tense... in the same paragraph.
wow, bleu, your both suicidal AND insane taking lightning like that, i've only ever seen anyone do that safely a few times in videogames
On finishing read through, I loved the references I knew would hit once I read the ship's name. The Kill Bill refs were nice too.
114370 That is answered in chapter 18..... I never said they were going to be first just that that was the plan.
122554 ::Wiki's the name:: Hmm sort of.Though further along i don't think he will fit. Also keep in mind chapter one is just what Celestia remembers from 1k years before. memories fade.
127593 umm thank you
134966 Honestly half the time i will admit to flying by the seat of my pants. Where i work gives me a great deal of time to think with no distractions[my work is fairly mindless and i go on auto piolet alot] I keep a note book with me and jot down anything that pops into my head. The rest of it is just conecting the dots between the ideas. then i just think how the chars would react to those ideas. and then well you get this story.
135304 yes i have been told i have a issue with the tenses as well as grammer. though i am working on that . seems i am much better in later chapters than in the latest. So i am trying to work on that. Glad some one caught the kill bill. Honestly I put WAY to many Princess Bride refs in this one. Peril of watching the movie while I am trying to write. I tossed in A Little Prince ref as well. and I have no idea why.
135201 Bleu is based on D&D dragons [considering most dragons in the show are a mystery i thought this would be intresting] But just based on, there are things I plan to do with her that would make a DM go "no fraking way" Sufice to say nearly everything in this story has a purpose.
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The fact you had to wiki the name is a good sign.
*Sigh*
It appears to be moving away from what I thought it would be. I can only hope that the romance tag is there because of shipping involving Twilight and one of the others I mentioned in my last comment.
let me guess thats what happenend to you after writing this
Another chapter with Jer getting the bajeebus smacked out of him. Guy can't catch a break. Maybe roles will reverse somewhat and Luna will become more protective of him, similar to the stance Jer was taking at the beginning of this chapter. Probably one of the better chapters you've written so far, can't wait to see it continue.
and Luna won't open up to them at all!
great way to build a trust in youre "friends" Luna...
and catatonic jeh'rad is worst jeh'rad, althought i can see it after what those seaponies did to him...
140174 not sure why. unless it was just because that meant i never heard of him.
142759 The romance tag always shows up first on the tag list and it should be last, sorry this was not what you were expecting but the only romance so far is with OC's might have stuff in the future but that will be a while.
144934 FUS ROH yay.......
146446 Thank you. There is quite a bit i have planed with all of them. Needless to say stuff will get intresting once the conflict begins.
147710 hard to open up when everyone you know and love has grown old and died around you or simply been killed while you can do little more than watch. Likely that would scar anyone. I have plans to build on this keep in mind really most of them have been more business like than actualy friends save in small parts. Luna does not want to open up because shes found that brings pain. The rest realize this are still trying and putting up with it. Though in Rhede's case its mostly for Jer'rahd's sake that he puts up with her. The pair have sort of a rarity applejack dislike for one another and it takes another pony to get them to deal well with each other.
Honestly the sea pony thing was a spur of the moment deal. I had a whole other set of missons for them and then the idea hit me and i ran with it. well this is the result.
149568 that chapter was mostly there for a few people who claimed the story was predictable and they knew what was going to happen, that and the idea amused me greatly.
What the heck is a duresseven? I've never heard of the word, and I can't find it in any dictionaries.
Knights! I bid you welcome to your new home! Let us ride to CANTERLOT!
Oh I love the end of this chapter. Luckily for Jer he can have rain on demand. Imagine trying to do that kind of training when you have no control over the weather.
Nice use of "Monty Python and the Holy Grail" reference
PICK A TENSE PLEASE!
Every chapter better then the last.
Mmmmm.... Bacon.
Sucks they are all mostly vegetarians.
Jer'rahd has to be THE Alpha Badass of his time. I can't see anypony even remotely being able to out badass him at this point. Now what happened to Dash at the end of the chapter was hilarious. I've had friends who have gotten into states like that before and I have used the cold water barrage to wake them. Granted it never was a barrel full of said water but still.
yep nothen of great importance yep nothen at all care for a brew after this. lol
Wow, 21 chapters is a lot of reading. Your storytelling skills are amazing, but your spelling and grammar are terrible! THe last three chapters or so have shown improvement, but it's still really bad. Despite that, I like this story.
You really need a proofreader. If the problems were fixed, I would give you five stars. Until then, I will hold off giving it a rating.
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168661 172061>>180128>>183123 I have said before I am currently in process of having the whole thing edited and repaired. The bigest problem is I put out the chapters way faster than the proof readers can handle them [ie: the furthest one of them is along is chapter three. ] I am always looking for more people to look over what i have set up in google docs to help me out. I am curently reviseing chapter 5 to post there but chapter 22 is in the works as well. I need to keep rolling with any groove i have.
177878 thank you
178021 its all crushed under brick and dust so you likely would not want any anyway.
178656 Jer'rahd trots a fine line. I am trying quite hard to make sure he does not go over board with what he does, but at that same time certain situations he gets put into require it. Lets just say that he will not get many like this.
178703 well a trip to the bar after an exstended hospitol stay. he never recovers , just like that. Even though i tend to time jump over most of the healing.
183123 I prefer comments to stars to be honest. and thank you for the compliment. I know I need proof readers and editors.Creativity i have , gramatical sense .... not so much.
183442 I just realized that If it weren't for the fact he is massively injured from that fight Jer would be a Mary sue......
183483 I am doing my best to avoid that with all of them.With the exception of the princesses [cause seriously?] they are all just normal ponies. [and a dragon and zebra] they get hurt, tired, there's trauma,scars. Of course they are going to do some impressive things but a war story about ponies who do nothing would be boring. I was waiting for this to come up, and i am doing my best to avoid letting them become that. Some people will still see them as such and i accept that. Even the mane 6 do things that could place them as MS but the reactions and consiquences are what keeps them from becoming such. I tried to mimic that a bit with SiS. yes they are going to be strong but thers reasons why they get that way. Though one has to keep in mind. No matter how strong you are , no matter how skilled, there will always be some one better.
183513Exactly....unless you are Kaldor Dragio.......... seriously......
183442 A brew does sound good nice homemade Irish brew mmmmm.
The next book that Rainbow Dash checks out
" Daring Do versus the tentacle monster of Venus" 
Daring Do and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.
"A bucking fridge? Really? No, Really???"
183545 I wiki'd that. and i just kinda stared for a moment. Then i saw that was canon and i
198226 last moment edition that i found amuseing just because some one mentioned Lara Crop as the ponified version of Lara Croft.
200368 Some one beat me to that in comic form.
205111 I am just as impressed some one even got the refrence. I try to do that and blend everything I still need some work on bits of it.
I am well aware my tense compleatly sucks. i am currently looking for Grammar police to run through my work but i am also redoing some of the earlier chapters to blend them a bit better with the later ones. No drastic changes so theres no need to reread them[unless you want to] but enough will be changed that you can read something new and go back to look at the mentioned part and go "oh yeah" rather than "Wait what?"
I really like this story. The grammar is poor at times (which I know you are working on), but is does virtually nothing to detract from the actual story. I must admit, though, I don't like the "real time" segments involving the "Mane 6", and usually skip them over just to get to the next set of flashbacks. I'm starting to get this feeling of dread, though, since I know that as soon as the whole dragon thing resolves itself Luna is going to go bat- s*** and the whole "Nightmare Moon" bit is going to go down. Also, I really like the subtle references, chief among them Biggs Hosun. THAT one gave me a good laugh. Get the next chapter up soon.
wth i just got done reading the last chapter wow dude you work fast.