• Member Since 26th Sep, 2011
  • offline last seen 5 hours ago


"[FoME] manages the impossible combination of being an actual legitimate nerd while staying unabashedly pleasant." —Aragón


His great-great-great-great grandfather was a unicorn. Her great aunt's second cousin twice removed was a pegasus. So he claimed.

Some saw this as the desperate justifications of a cuckold in denial. Others saw a metafictional wink at an anthropoid audience. The truth, as is so often the case, is far, far stranger.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 35 )

Oh, this sounds like it'll be good for a few laughs, time to read.

Having been physically (but not mentally) present at the birth of my children, I can state without question that the delivery scene is extremely accuracte, right up to and including the mention of the word 'insurance' before the labor pains have even ceased.

Note for humans: Make sure the wife trims her nails before delivery. Short. Really short. Otherwise, all they are is talons. I still have the scars. She was remarkably without sympathy for my pain.

maybe because she was angry at you at the time because she was screaming in pain while pushing a living thing out of her

The phrase "headcanon accepted" is so overused these days. Nevertheless... :twilightsmile:

And now Redheart and COldheart are living it up in their enormous palatial mansions, waited on 24/7 by steaming hunky stallions in thongs and bow ties. Because why not? :pinkiehappy:

EDIT: And oh yes. Dr Itor. What you did there, I see it.

I hope the Nurses enjoy their one million bits and new fancy airships because I would be pissed as hell!

Head canon accepted, good sir!

Still a little creepy Cupcake and Carrot love each other that way.

Personally, I still think that the sire is Princess Celestia. It happened during the Bird in the Hoof party -- Mrs. Cake was overwhelmed by her love for the Princess, and Celestia was overwhelmed by her love of pastries, and the magic of love did the rest. :twilightsmile:

2708924 Oh I can see how that would go.

"Your Highnesses, we demand a million bits and a new airship!"
"Hey Redheart, what are we doing in Canterlot?"


Ah yes. The Men in Black pen trick. That would explains so much about pony behavior.

2709236 "Everypony gather around and look at the horn."
(puts on sunglasses)


This is my new favorite thing to quote out of context.

2708814 2708924
:rainbowhuh: Wait, seriously? I'm not complaining, but... really? Why is it always the silly ones that seem to gain traction in readers' minds?

"What you saw was the aurora from the Crystal Empire reflected off of a weather balloon and refracted through some swamp gas. Happens all the time."

Yeah, when I wrote that, I stopped, reread it, and said to myself, "I really just wrote that." You can see why I suspect blunt force trauma was involved in the formation of this idea.

2712298 Not seriously, no. The reason the silly ones stick in the mind is because they're so outside the norm. :pinkiesmile: However, I do like the idea of alicorn Cakes regardless of origin just because it's so silly...

almost a form of love.

Well, not "love", per se, but arguably romance. Specifically the caliginous sort. If you value your sanity, inquire no further.

your two cakes we,e, in a very literal

Um... Not sure what to say about that

2713359 My first thought was that it was more of kismesissitude. Could just be me though. :33

And being an ADD-prone pony, so distracted was I by "Hey, I was thinking that too! :rainbowlaugh:" that I forgot to comment on the story itself. Normally I get distracted by something in the featured box long before I can scroll down to the "Hey hey hey this just got submitted, you should look" box. I'm very, very glad I did this time. I was giggling madly at the opening of the story, and it didn't stop throughout. The exchanges between all characters involved were a thing of comedic beauty. I can't put a hoof on it but there is something that feels a bit off about the ending. If I could offer more insight on that, I would. It's far from weak, and from a story perspective it concludes everything nicely, so I feel silly even bringing it up.

Consider thyself watched for future things!

2714616 :facehoof: Kismesissitude is the caliginous quadrant!

2714740 *facehoof 2x combo* Don't mind me. I keep thinking of auspisticism when I should be thinking caliginous. The pony who got me reading that-which-shall-not-be-named in the first place will surely have words with me regarding proper comprehension of blackrom.

This was... strange. But it was good nonetheless.

Oh my God, this is just BRILLIANT :heart::heart::heart:

I like it!
Eheheheh, "Ali-Cakes". How come I've never come across that term before?

Probably because the Cakes as alicorns isn't a terribly common occurrence.

This is so crazy, it starts making sense! :pinkiehappy:

pinkie already knew

Also a lovely one shot.


Awwww, I was guessing 'Tria was short for triage. I apparently neglected to notice the ' was before not after. And the fact that Triage Redheart/Redheart Triage just sounds silly.

That... was strange. But with dialog like:


it's hard not to love.

And then they just show Celestia's letter to the Mane Six.

(Celestia) *jawdrop* But ... but the geas!
(Redheart) Not our fault you wrote it out yourself. All we did was share the letter.
(Celestia) *RAEG* >:C ....You used my own letter against me. I do not appreciate these shenanigans. >:C


Neither was even particularly surprised when the letter burst into heatless flames, not even leaving ash.

She thought of that. :trollestia:

5415874 I had missed that part; my bad.

Still..... Letter blocks, then. Lots of letter blocks. XD No rule, no law, no compulsive behavior is without exception.


But I can only IMAGINE how she would react when/if they found the loophole. XD


Still a better explanation than "lolcuck".

(Also, you've a b0rked [size] tag at the beginning of Dainty and Taproot's game of insult tennis, likely thanks to a site update.)

Thanks for the heads up on the size tag update. And this certainly explains why Celestia hasn't already knighted the Cakes and swept them away to Canterlot.

Divine desserts. :pinkiehappy: I had to say that.

Okay. this actually makes MUCH more sense.

I haven't laughed so hard in a while. The creativity here is amazing.

Celestia blinked, puzzled. "I accidentally caused a pair of desserts to ascend to sapience and unfathomable magical power because of their sheer deliciousness.

The more I think about it... the more hilarious it gets... :rainbowlaugh:

Login or register to comment